Exercise makes me depressed. Anyone else this way?
sam33a
Posts: 31 Member
I just cannot get myself to exercise. I joined the gym with the aim of going 5 days a week. However, the first week I managed to go 3 days, the second week, again I went for 3 days. The third week I went 2 days and so far this week I haven't been once. I just hate going. It's so time-consuming, it can easily eat 2.5-3 hours out of my day. Plus, the gym is a good 15-minute walk away from my house and I hate walking there and back. The whole thing is just stressful.
I know people will say to do something else instead, but that just never happens either. I have an exercise machine at home and weights, they rarely get used. I have exercise videos I can do, again, never get used. How can I learn to love exercise?
I've had to lower my calories to 1250 so that I can hopefully, still lose weight, but weight loss without exercise is terribly slow. I lose maybe 2 lbs a month if I'm lucky.
I know people will say to do something else instead, but that just never happens either. I have an exercise machine at home and weights, they rarely get used. I have exercise videos I can do, again, never get used. How can I learn to love exercise?
I've had to lower my calories to 1250 so that I can hopefully, still lose weight, but weight loss without exercise is terribly slow. I lose maybe 2 lbs a month if I'm lucky.
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Replies
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Personally not being able to exercise depresses me.
As would eating such a miniscule amount of food - you have my sympathies!
Is there no outdoor exercise you enjoy? Maybe it's the gym environment you dislike?
PS - it's not clear why you hate walking for 15 minutes or why it would take up to 3hrs out of your day. What else would you be doing with this time?7 -
It sounds like you just need to figure out which type of exercise you can get excited about.10
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Maybe do something fun instead? Join a sport or learn a martial art or sign up for a dance class or something.
I loathe exercise for exercise sake, so I play a rhythm video game that makes me dance, duck and jump. Crazy cardio.4 -
Not sure why it's taking up to 3 hours. 15 minutes there plus 15 minutes back is 30 minutes and your cardio is done. Spend 60 minutes on strength training and you are done in 90 minutes.
Do you have an MP3 player? That can make the walk and workout more interesting. I like listening to NPR when I am walking or gardening, and I have an awesome playlist for lifting weights.
Reading between the lines I think it's possible that exercise itself is not the problem, but rather depression and anxiety. Has this been an issue for which you have sought help in the past?
I have struggled with depression and anxiety and what helps me these days more than talk therapy or meds is...exercise!* I often have to force myself to start, but am always glad I did. Are you fine once you start heading towards the gym?
* I am aware that not everyone with depression benefits from exercise, but statistically speaking studies have shown it is indeed beneficial for mild-moderate depression.6 -
Personally not being able to exercise depresses me.
As would eating such a miniscule amount of food - you have my sympathies!
Is there no outdoor exercise you enjoy? Maybe it's the gym environment you dislike?
PS - it's not clear why you hate walking for 15 minutes or why it would take up to 3hrs out of your day. What else would you be doing with this time?
I dislike all forms of exercise. I wish I didn't. Maybe I'm just lazy. As for why I hate walking there. That's 30 minutes there and back in a busy area. I hate crowds of people. I work during the day and I'm also writing my dissertation in the evenings and weekends. I would much rather be studying than working out. I honestly just don't understand how people can enjoy it.10 -
I do my exercise at home because I also can't find motivation to keep going to a gym.
A side effect of that is that my house is filling up with exercise equipment.6 -
I hated to exercise too. I forced myself to do it because everyone else seems to love it, why don't I?? Now that I'm seeing results with the strength training program Ive been using, I'm enjoying working out a lot more. I still don't LOVE it like some people, and if I had to leave my house or be around other people I would never do it. You just need to find an activity you like to do.3
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Also I workout first thing in the morning. If I put it off until later in the day I would never do it.3
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kshama2001 wrote: »Not sure why it's taking up to 3 hours. 15 minutes there plus 15 minutes back is 30 minutes and your cardio is done. Spend 60 minutes on strength training and you are done in 90 minutes.
Do you have an MP3 player? That can make the walk and workout more interesting. I like listening to NPR when I am walking or gardening, and I have an awesome playlist for lifting weights.
Reading between the lines I think it's possible that exercise itself is not the problem, but rather depression and anxiety. Has this been an issue for which you have sought help in the past?
I have struggled with depression and anxiety and what helps me these days more than talk therapy or meds is...exercise!* I often have to force myself to start, but am always glad I did. Are you fine once you start heading towards the gym?
* I am aware that not everyone with depression benefits from exercise, but statistically speaking studies have shown it is indeed beneficial for mild-moderate depression.
I've been a little stressed over the last year but I think exercise makes me depressed. I know, apparently, it's meant to have the opposite effect but not in my case. I can't think of doing it long-term. I'm okay once I'm there and working out. Usually, I spend a good while exercising to make the most of my visit but then I think of all that time it's taken and regret it. I can't say I actually enjoy any of it because I don't.6 -
Personally not being able to exercise depresses me.
As would eating such a miniscule amount of food - you have my sympathies!
Is there no outdoor exercise you enjoy? Maybe it's the gym environment you dislike?
PS - it's not clear why you hate walking for 15 minutes or why it would take up to 3hrs out of your day. What else would you be doing with this time?
I dislike all forms of exercise. I wish I didn't. Maybe I'm just lazy. As for why I hate walking there. That's 30 minutes there and back in a busy area. I hate crowds of people. I work during the day and I'm also writing my dissertation in the evenings and weekends. I would much rather be studying than working out. I honestly just don't understand how people can enjoy it.
If you truly can't find anything in the massively wide scope of exercise/sport/physical activity you can enjoy then maybe just think of it as an investment of time for a reward of improved health and fitness.
A bit like investing in your further education / degree is an investment in your future career?
Not seeing how a gym workout and 30 mins of walking adds up to 3hrs though.
If you don't like being amongst people then maybe getting out and about in the countryside would appeal more?4 -
It is a common misconception that exercise has to be running or weight lifiting or in some other way a big deal. In reality, anything that you do above and beyond your normal routine is exercise. If the gym is too daunting a task (or you just plain hate it), are their little things you can add into your routine? Walking one bus stop farther? Taking the stairs in your school/office/apartment? A social group for an activity you like? A park you could walk to and study? A series of YouTube dance videos with your favorite music?
It’s ok if the gym isn’t for you, but there are lots of ways to incorporate being active into your day. And if you are feeling depressed, demotivsted, or stressed out, a lot of schools (in the US) have counseling centers that are free for students (even grad students, assuming that your dissertation isnpart of grad studies) as part of the student health department. It helped me out a lot when I was in school.7 -
I hated to exercise too. I forced myself to do it because everyone else seems to love it, why don't I?? Now that I'm seeing results with the strength training program Ive been using, I'm enjoying working out a lot more. I still don't LOVE it like some people, and if I had to leave my house or be around other people I would never do it. You just need to find an activity you like to do.
That's what I was hoping. That even if I don't love it, I'll still do it because of the results. However, I don't stick with it long enough to see any. Maybe I should try a class. I've never been to one before because I'm not as fit as I would like to be and would hate to be the only one not able to keep up.2 -
I hated to exercise too. I forced myself to do it because everyone else seems to love it, why don't I?? Now that I'm seeing results with the strength training program Ive been using, I'm enjoying working out a lot more. I still don't LOVE it like some people, and if I had to leave my house or be around other people I would never do it. You just need to find an activity you like to do.
That's what I was hoping. That even if I don't love it, I'll still do it because of the results. However, I don't stick with it long enough to see any. Maybe I should try a class. I've never been to one before because I'm not as fit as I would like to be and would hate to be the only one not able to keep up.
Group fitness is great. I have never been a self motivator. Even now, despite being almost a year into my exercise, I still have trouble motivating if it is just me by myself exercising (I've gotten better, but still struggle). But in a group fitness environment is where I excel. All I feel like I need to do is show up. Once I do that, the motivation gets taken care of fore me.
Don't worry about not being able to keep up. Nobody keeps up at first. If everyone could, there'd be no point to the class. You'll get better.
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everyone is different and I really dont think exercise helps that much with my weight loss and I love exercise, biking hiking, zumba with the gals. I went to the gym for a year and never lose a pound. I got my eating right and lost 30 lbs. I have a friend at church who went to all kinds of active things with her grandchldren, active stuff and had to force herself. She had rather be studying something. I wished I liked to study but accept myself, I am more the active type.1
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kshama2001 wrote: »Not sure why it's taking up to 3 hours. 15 minutes there plus 15 minutes back is 30 minutes and your cardio is done. Spend 60 minutes on strength training and you are done in 90 minutes.
Do you have an MP3 player? That can make the walk and workout more interesting. I like listening to NPR when I am walking or gardening, and I have an awesome playlist for lifting weights.
Reading between the lines I think it's possible that exercise itself is not the problem, but rather depression and anxiety. Has this been an issue for which you have sought help in the past?
I have struggled with depression and anxiety and what helps me these days more than talk therapy or meds is...exercise!* I often have to force myself to start, but am always glad I did. Are you fine once you start heading towards the gym?
* I am aware that not everyone with depression benefits from exercise, but statistically speaking studies have shown it is indeed beneficial for mild-moderate depression.
I've been a little stressed over the last year but I think exercise makes me depressed. I know, apparently, it's meant to have the opposite effect but not in my case. I can't think of doing it long-term. I'm okay once I'm there and working out. Usually, I spend a good while exercising to make the most of my visit but then I think of all that time it's taken and regret it. I can't say I actually enjoy any of it because I don't.
Try shortening the time so you don't resent it as much
Are there any audio books related to your dissertation you could listen to while you are walking/working out? Or something to make the time feel more productive? Or podcasts you like to simply make it more enjoyable?
I too don't like crowds so when I had a gym membership timed my visits to be off peak times. Yes, it was harder forcing myself out of the house later at night, but I was glad for the almost empty gym. As my schedule has changed, I've also gone first thing in the AM and at lunch, but never peak times. I moved and don't like any of the gyms near my new place so now work out at home, which does take more discipline.3 -
brenn24179 wrote: »everyone is different and I really dont think exercise helps that much with my weight loss and I love exercise, biking hiking, zumba with the gals. I went to the gym for a year and never lose a pound. I got my eating right and lost 30 lbs. I have a friend at church who went to all kinds of active things with her grandchldren, active stuff and had to force herself. She had rather be studying something. I wished I liked to study but accept myself, I am more the active type.
I lost almost 60 lbs a few years ago just by sorting my diet out. Ate 1200 calories for 1.5 years, got down to 107 lbs and kept it off for a couple of years. I then gained 35 back. Very quickly. Within a matter of a few months. I just got tired of eating such a low amount and the weight shot back up. I'd love to exercise so I don't have to limit the calories as drastically this time around.2 -
Maybe you like
moving but not exercise which is kinda boring unless you don’t feel like your exercising. You could try something like putting music on at home and see if it helps. Dancing seems to come pretty easily if the music is great. And a great song can get you motivated while exercising.0 -
I just cannot get myself to exercise. I joined the gym with the aim of going 5 days a week. However, the first week I managed to go 3 days, the second week, again I went for 3 days. The third week I went 2 days and so far this week I haven't been once. I just hate going. It's so time-consuming, it can easily eat 2.5-3 hours out of my day. Plus, the gym is a good 15-minute walk away from my house and I hate walking there and back. The whole thing is just stressful.
I know people will say to do something else instead, but that just never happens either. I have an exercise machine at home and weights, they rarely get used. I have exercise videos I can do, again, never get used. How can I learn to love exercise?
I've had to lower my calories to 1250 so that I can hopefully, still lose weight, but weight loss without exercise is terribly slow. I lose maybe 2 lbs a month if I'm lucky.
What the hell are you doing that the gym takes 2.5-3 hours out of your day. A 15 minute there and back is 30 minutes. Another 30-60 exercising...
At any rate, you don't need a gym or exercise equipment or DVDs or whatever. My primary exercise is riding my bike...I also do a little hiking, some rock climbing here and there, and I spend a lot of time playing with my kids in the pool. I don't really do exercise for the sake of exercise...most of my exercise is what most people would consider recreational activity. I'm not real big on the gym at the moment, but even when I was hitting the weight room, it was 3x per week...zero reason for me to get to the gym more than that.
To me, it sounds like you're trying to do too much too soon. You don't have to exercise for hours on end and you don't have to spend 5x per week in the gym.6 -
Personally not being able to exercise depresses me.
As would eating such a miniscule amount of food - you have my sympathies!
Is there no outdoor exercise you enjoy? Maybe it's the gym environment you dislike?
PS - it's not clear why you hate walking for 15 minutes or why it would take up to 3hrs out of your day. What else would you be doing with this time?
I dislike all forms of exercise. I wish I didn't. Maybe I'm just lazy. As for why I hate walking there. That's 30 minutes there and back in a busy area. I hate crowds of people. I work during the day and I'm also writing my dissertation in the evenings and weekends. I would much rather be studying than working out. I honestly just don't understand how people can enjoy it.
If you truly can't find anything in the massively wide scope of exercise/sport/physical activity you can enjoy then maybe just think of it as an investment of time for a reward of improved health and fitness.
A bit like investing in your further education / degree is an investment in your future career?
Not seeing how a gym workout and 30 mins of walking adds up to 3hrs though.
If you don't like being amongst people then maybe getting out and about in the countryside would appeal more?
I include all the time it takes from getting up to go to the gym to coming back home. Take Sunday for example. I headed to the gym at 4pm and returned home at 7pm. I do cardio for around an hour and then another 45-60 minutes on weights. I don't drive and so heading out to the countryside whenever I fancy isn't exactly feasible. I live in a city in England. The countryside is miles away, unfortunately.1 -
I dislike all forms of exercise. I wish I didn't. Maybe I'm just lazy. As for why I hate walking there. That's 30 minutes there and back in a busy area. I hate crowds of people. I work during the day and I'm also writing my dissertation in the evenings and weekends. I would much rather be studying than working out. I honestly just don't understand how people can enjoy it.
I tend to agree, although I keep my thoughts to myself because many people here simply don't understand. If you hate it so much, I think that you have bitten off too much, simply stop going. Given that the vast majority of weight loss is caused by controlling what we eat, just control your intake instead.
I do understand how people can enjoy exercise, but I'm not one of those people.
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Maybe don't worry about it until you finish your dissertation. That has to be a source of stress on its own. I will say three hours seems excessive even with 30 minutes of walking. That means you're working out for 2.5 hours. That's a lot for someone who hates exercise. I think I'd hate that too.2
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Honestly, I feel ya. I go to the gym pretty regularly but if I had it my way I'd never exercise.
I have tried nearly everything over the years and the gym for me is the one that's stuck simply because it fits my lifestyle. However, even after 10 plus years of going on and off, it's still a struggle to get up and go.
I do enjoy walks, but right now where I live is super hilly and it's so easy to simply not go. Haha.2 -
Personally not being able to exercise depresses me.
As would eating such a miniscule amount of food - you have my sympathies!
Is there no outdoor exercise you enjoy? Maybe it's the gym environment you dislike?
PS - it's not clear why you hate walking for 15 minutes or why it would take up to 3hrs out of your day. What else would you be doing with this time?
I dislike all forms of exercise. I wish I didn't. Maybe I'm just lazy. As for why I hate walking there. That's 30 minutes there and back in a busy area. I hate crowds of people. I work during the day and I'm also writing my dissertation in the evenings and weekends. I would much rather be studying than working out. I honestly just don't understand how people can enjoy it.
If you truly can't find anything in the massively wide scope of exercise/sport/physical activity you can enjoy then maybe just think of it as an investment of time for a reward of improved health and fitness.
A bit like investing in your further education / degree is an investment in your future career?
Not seeing how a gym workout and 30 mins of walking adds up to 3hrs though.
If you don't like being amongst people then maybe getting out and about in the countryside would appeal more?
I include all the time it takes from getting up to go to the gym to coming back home. Take Sunday for example. I headed to the gym at 4pm and returned home at 7pm. I do cardio for around an hour and then another 45-60 minutes on weights. I don't drive and so heading out to the countryside whenever I fancy isn't exactly feasible. I live in a city in England. The countryside is miles away, unfortunately.
Maybe exercise far more efficiently and for shorter time periods?
There is no reason for you to be doing two hours of exercise in one go.
I live in England too, on the outskirts of the London urban sprawl. I can be in a peaceful environment without crowds very quickly. Most cities have parks, public transport or countryside within easy reach.6 -
I've joined a lot of gyms over the years and followed the same trajectory of starting off strong with 3+ visits a week, and then a few months later having to deal with the "customer retention" teams and the cancellation penalties.
Clearly the solution, assuming you are not willing to be a person who just doesn't exercise, is to get a home machine that you can tolerate. That will knock your three hour investment down to 30 minutes plus a quick shower.
And just as clearly, you need a machine you can use while watching TV so that you don't have to pay attention to the fact that you're exercising, or enjoy it, or really, do anything other than get it over with.
Exercise isn't just for weight loss, and at some point in your life whether or not you kept in shape will become crucially important, and if you didn't, you'll pay dearly. It's better to suck it up and find a way to make exercise happen, whether you enjoy it or not. There are lots of things you do without liking it. Do you like paying taxes? Fixing a flat tire? Going to the doctor? You just do them because you have to. Add exercise to that list and get on it.
A machine you can use while watching TV is probably the ticket for you. Recumbent bike, treadmill with a panel screen, etc. Or, load up your phone with tunes you like, get a good pair of headphones, and put on those walking shoes. The louder you make the music, the less you'll notice you're walking LOL
1250 is not a realistic number of calories to eat. Have you ever heard of a single person who ate 1250 and stuck with it over time? That kind of diet doesn't last. People who do 1250 are the people who a year later have gained it all back and are posting about yo-yo dieting.
I disagree with the posts above that say exercise isn't very important to a diet. Actually, it is. If you're running a 500 calorie deficit on a 1,500 calorie diet and doing 300 calories of cardio per day, depending on whether you eat the exercise calories back the exercise accounts for either (a) 38 % of your total weight lost, or (b) an additional 20 % more food. Either way, the impact of exercise on a diet, just mathematically speaking, is absolutely huge. Beyond the numbers, exercise is a habit that keeps you on track as far as feeling like you're working on your own health and well being, which helps a lot when dieting starts to seem tedious, which it will. Yes, you can diet without exercising, but it's harder and slower, and easier to just fall off the diet as soon as there's a life interruption or event. Exercise keeps you plugged into a larger self-improvement project that gives the dieting context and purpose.7 -
I sometimes don't feel like exercising but the thought of exercising (or doing anything else) never makes me feel depressed.
Actual mental "depression" is a clinical condition that may or may not require professional treatment that probably has a lot more to do w/just than exercise.
Consult a psychologist if it is something that feels overwhelming to you. Otherwise, like the rest of us, just assess the problem and deal w/it the best you can.
The key is to have clear and realistic objectives, make a plan to achieve them and stick to the plan until you do6 -
It sounds like you just haven’t found an activity that will hold your interest. You don’t have to love it, but you should be able to find something that is at the very least tolerable. Try a new activity every week until you find something that is a good fit for you. There are millions of things you can try: tennis, swimming, walking, rollerblading, dancing, rock climbing, frisbee, jumping rope, CrossFit, boxing, weightlifting, running, aerobics, basketball, soccer, etc.
In addition, I think you may need to change your attitude toward exercise. If you start out thinking negatively about how much you hate it and how much it sucks, it makes sense that you won’t want to do it. Reframe your thoughts and the way you talk to yourself about exercise. Invite a friend to join you and make it into an adventure.
Alternatively, you can continue on your current path forcing yourself to go to the gym and being miserable until you finally give up and become one of those people who pay for a gym membership that they never use.2 -
Exercise isn't depressing you. Forcing yourself to do activities you don't enjoy is depressing you and I can't think of anything more depressing than dedicating hours of my time doing something I hate.
The solution is don't "exercise". There's nothing anywhere that says that you need to "exercise" in order to be healthy. What you need to be is "active" and being active can be achieved in loads of different ways.
Personally, I find the best way for me to stay active is to have a bunch of different things to chose from.
- I have a bicycle for when I feel like going for a ride.
- I have weights at home for when I feel like pick up heavy things and putting them back down again.
- I have swimming gear for when I feel like going for a swim.
- I have scuba gear for when I feel like going for a dive.
- I have a bodyboard for when I feel like going to the beach.
- I have a backpack and walking shoes for when I feel like going for a walk/hike and I have golf clubs for when I feel like going for a walk that makes me very angry
Point being is that every one of those things gets me up and moving and not one of them feels like "exercise". Forget about exercising for exercising sake and find one, two or ten different hobbies/pastimes/things that you want to do and just do them.8 -
I love gym group classes but I used to hate going. I found stuff I enjoyed instead like hiking and horse riding and focused on that until I found a gym I loved. Now you can’t keep me out of it0
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We all need balance. It does no good to persue health at the expense of happiness, or happiness at the expense of health.
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I wouldn’t say exercise makes me depressed but it’s certainly so stressful to fit into my life that I rarely do any form of ‘purposeful’ exercise.
Stressors include:
1. Unsupportive sarcastic husband who works from home so is always around.
2. Distance from nearest bearable gym. Also see point 1.
3. I’m not a ‘joiner’ so can think of little worse than classes. If there was yoga anywhere near me I’d think about it, but see point 1.
4. It bores me to tears! I can get 3 or 4 reps into something and want to scream with the tedium.
So, I just try and increase my daily activity where I can...housework, gardening, decorating, walking the dog (small dog so distance is restricted), some resistance band stuff while reading/watching Netflix etc on my iPad alone in my bedroom after I’ve gone to bed(we don’t share a bedroom because he’s overweight and a dreadful snorer). I’ll park right at the back of a car park, shop like a moron in the supermarket so I can go back and forward through the aisles rather than being logical. 😂, take the stairs anytime I can in preference to a lift or escalator.
Maybe once a month I’ll go for a proper walk with a friend, maybe 14 to 16 miles when we do this, but she’s 20 years younger than I am so still has small children at home so opportunities for this are limited. Even this is met with derision and scorn from my husband ‘so you’re off for one of your little walks eh?’....🙄. I told him a couple of days ago I was going to go pick a prescription up at the doctors and would be walking so I’d be longer than expected. His response was to say ‘Alexa’ is Barbara insane’ to his Amazon Echo on his desk....
Honestly, if it’s depressing or stressful I’d suggest you don’t do it, the benefits are probably not sufficient to counterbalance the way it makes you feel to do it.7
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