Lies, Lies, Lies
your_future_ex_wife
Posts: 4,278 Member
Tell me your experiences with lying. Your most interesting. Your most subtle, profitable, or mutually acceptable. Tell me about when you got caught in a lie.
Tell me the ones you’re ashamed of and the ones that secretly make you gloat.
I’d like to hear your reasons and excuses, but mostly I want to hear the juicy stories.
Please stay within MFP guidelines.
Tell me the ones you’re ashamed of and the ones that secretly make you gloat.
I’d like to hear your reasons and excuses, but mostly I want to hear the juicy stories.
Please stay within MFP guidelines.
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Replies
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your_future_ex_wife wrote: »Tell me your experiences with lying. Your most interesting. Your most subtle, profitable, or mutually acceptable. Tell me about when you got caught in a lie.
Tell me the ones you’re ashamed of and the ones that secretly make you gloat.
I’d like to hear your reasons and excuses, but mostly I want to hear the juicy stories.
Please stay within MFP guidelines.
I sometimes pretend like people said something different than what they said. That being said I love pies. I'm all about pies. Pies, Pies, Pies!
It's the best.2 -
I’m not going to say who because it’s a really effing terrible thing I did and I’m ashamed. But in high school I lied to my psychology teacher and said someone dear to me passed away so I could get out of the exam. She let me write it 3 days later. So in someways I am where I am because of that lie. I aced the exam because I had more time but it isn’t something I’ve really let go.6
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My best lies, the most convincing, have been half truths. Or half lies. However you want to say it. Lies of omission are pretty effective too.
And in my younger years I was the master at preemptive confessions. I’d be just about to be caught and deliver academy worthy confessions. “Mommy, I know you said not to have anyone over while you were at work but she just stopped by and is really upset because her parents are getting divorced.”
As a teenager I’d leave my diary lying around with bogus entries in it because I knew it would be read.0 -
your_future_ex_wife wrote: »My best lies, the most convincing, have been half truths. Or half lies. However you want to say it. Lies of omission are pretty effective too.
And in my younger years I was the master at preemptive confessions. I’d be just about to be caught and deliver academy worthy confessions. “Mommy, I know you said not to have anyone over while you were at work but she just stopped by and is really upset because her parents are getting divorced.”
As a teenager I’d leave my diary lying around with bogus entries in it because I knew it would be read.
Dear Diary,
Today I ate 14 worms. A new personal best. I also think I can fly.7 -
One of the best lies I ever told was to my cat. I was like, "Cat, you're dumb".
Still laughing about that one.3 -
most recent little white lie was when i told someone "I think this is a great idea." pretty good one imho
the times i cheated were pretty bad though i guess. the marriage ended eventually for other reasons really. and she is much happier now and doing much better than we ever were together. i had some amazing years with the last person i'd cheated with afterwards, and i don't regret having her in my life in any way.
but idk if i'd do it again if i had the choice. it's hard to say because i've changed so much from who i was, the guy who proposed. i barely remember that guy's motivations anymore and i don't think who i am now would have gotten married to begin with. too much is different now.
can't change the past though. gotta keep moving forward.
the married/otherwise attached girls i've cheated with in the past though i never really felt bad about. if it hadn't been me it would've been someone else, so it might as well have been me, who actually cared in some kind of way5 -
tl;dr ❤️most recent little white lie was when i told someone "I think this is a great idea." pretty good one imho
the times i cheated were pretty bad though i guess. the marriage ended eventually for other reasons really. and she is much happier now and doing much better than we ever were together. i had some amazing years with the last person i'd cheated with afterwards, and i don't regret having her in my life in any way.
but idk if i'd do it again if i had the choice. it's hard to say because i've changed so much from who i was, the guy who proposed. i barely remember that guy's motivations anymore and i don't think who i am now would have gotten married to begin with. too much is different now.
can't change the past though. gotta keep moving forward.
the married/otherwise attached girls i've cheated with in the past though i never really felt bad about. if it hadn't been me it would've been someone else, so it might as well have been me, who actually cared in some kind of way
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When I was about 8 I opened a package of chocolates I saw in the kitchen. My mom got mad and asked "WHO OPENED THIS BOX OF CHOCOLATES?" Apparently they were supposed to be a Christmas present for someone. I said "I don't remember, maybe I did it when I was asleep." She said something like "I think somebody knows who opened the chocolates", and then dropped it.
I felt so bad, every time I've consider lying since, I remember this.2 -
When I was about 8 I opened a package of chocolates I saw in the kitchen. My mom got mad and asked "WHO OPENED THIS BOX OF CHOCOLATES?" Apparently they were supposed to be a Christmas present for someone. I said "I don't remember, maybe I did it when I was asleep." She said something like "I think somebody knows who opened the chocolates", and then dropped it.
I felt so bad, every time I've consider lying since, I remember this.
you are so rare and i can’t find a good enough emoji1 -
I just told a client I had to take this other call so I could get off the phone and then I didn't answer the other call. I just didn't feel like listening to the client whine. That's the first lie I've told today.1
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I had one friend who used to wear some crazy hairstyles and outfits. When we were younger I stretched the truth telling her she looked nice when she didn’t.
Other than that, I don’t lie.3 -
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most recent little white lie was when i told someone "I think this is a great idea." pretty good one imho
the times i cheated were pretty bad though i guess. the marriage ended eventually for other reasons really. and she is much happier now and doing much better than we ever were together. i had some amazing years with the last person i'd cheated with afterwards, and i don't regret having her in my life in any way.
but idk if i'd do it again if i had the choice. it's hard to say because i've changed so much from who i was, the guy who proposed. i barely remember that guy's motivations anymore and i don't think who i am now would have gotten married to begin with. too much is different now.
can't change the past though. gotta keep moving forward.
the married/otherwise attached girls i've cheated with in the past though i never really felt bad about. if it hadn't been me it would've been someone else, so it might as well have been me, who actually cared in some kind of way
You're such a cowboy 😂🤣1 -
I know! I hate that!
I think I just say things and they sound so ridiculous that people think I’m joking. I get away with a lot that way.
Now I think of it, that’s what everyone on MFP does - I’m joking if you are.
I was serious about believing you.
Though it is just exactly what a liar would say. hmmmmmm.1 -
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i gotchuJustReadTheInstructions wrote: »Just don't believe anything I say, how 'bout that
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Basically everything I say should be taken with a grain of salt because I lie like a cat in the sun
Can’t really trust anything that comes outta my mouth3 -
Sometimes I don’t know if I’m lying or just being optimistic3
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Reckoner68 wrote: »Basically everything I say should be taken with a grain of salt because I lie like a cat in the sun
Can’t really trust anything that comes outta my mouth
So what you just said is bs and you’re really a truth broker ??1 -
your_future_ex_wife wrote: »
I know! I hate that!
I think I just say things and they sound so ridiculous that people think I’m joking. I get away with a lot that way.
Now I think of it, that’s what everyone on MFP does - I’m joking if you are.
I was serious about believing you.
Though it is just exactly what a liar would say. hmmmmmm.
I think I would do better IRL. Tone is hard to gauge here, and I can be overly literal and a tad naive.
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When I was about 8 I opened a package of chocolates I saw in the kitchen. My mom got mad and asked "WHO OPENED THIS BOX OF CHOCOLATES?" Apparently they were supposed to be a Christmas present for someone. I said "I don't remember, maybe I did it when I was asleep." She said something like "I think somebody knows who opened the chocolates", and then dropped it.
I felt so bad, every time I've consider lying since, I remember this.
I had a similar experience. I forgot to do my homework in grade 4 and the teacher went through to class and got us to read our answers out loud. She got to me and I stammered and blushed and said I couldn't read my handwriting. She said, "You didn't do it, did you?"
No ma'am.
Shame. Shame. Shame2 -
"Don't worry. I'll tell you before."1
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FeelinFooFoo wrote: »My face, when I'm lying, has a look on it. That says "Im lying to you right now". So I kinda gave up lying. I just tell the truth even if it sometimes has the potential to cause me issues. I don't care cos it's the truth and I haven't got the energy to lie. But, of course I have told lies.
I have lied, once I think to work. Pretended I was ill. I was hungover. But I knew I could deafeat my giveaway face the next day, cos I did have a bit of a cough and I looked like *kitten*. Ok. This may have happened twice.
Iv never really been 'caught' in a lie just cos it's not something Iv done a lot.
A work mate asked me to answer some personal questions about her character. I didn't lie perse, I was economical with the truth, but it was like walking a minefield. I just filtered my answers 😂 ok. Lied. But didn't exactly blow smoke up her *kitten*.
Another 'lie' is how me and my bf met. We met online dating. But we have never told his family that, or his friends. I dunno. We both just kinda felt sensitive about it. Luckily, and strangely they have never asked. Now we have been together so long, I guess they will never ask. But I better come up with some 'we met at the fruit and veg isle in the supermarket, our eyes met over the isles, between the gauva and avocados'.....
Told lies to my dad without issue as a teen! Especially once I was old enough to date boys. Ok. The guy I was meeting might have been 28 and I was 16, so ya. My dad thought I was out for drinks with the 'girl's'. He knew, he knew. I took 5 hours to get ready. He knew.
One lie I am ashamed of. Probably always will be. My relationship with my mum had been broken down. She was acting all kinds of crazy. I left home around that time and some time later, was finally in my own flat (my first flat). My bf knew about how she had been acting towards me and was naturally protective. One night, without warning, we were lying in bed, all the lights out just kinda chatting. It was like 3 am. My buzzer starts ringing. And ringing. And ringing. Then my phone lights up. It was my mum. She called and called. I knew she was outside and wanted to come in, her lifestyle was a bit chaotic so it wasn't out of character for her to be up at 3am. I went to get up and let her in. Of course. It's my mum and I knew she had driven for hours as she lived a distance away. But my bf stopped me. He said she had no right to be turning up like that. I knew the lights were all out so I hoped and preyed she would assume I was asleep, or not at home. I lay in bed and the guilt washed over me. I pictured her having to drive all the way home. Alone. Upset. Feeling like crap. I told her I was sorry, and that I had been to my bf house that night I think she knew I had lied on that text message.
She passed away not long after that and I always think that would have been the last time I saw her and I just lay there while she buzzed the buzzer and she had to go and be alone.
That last one. I have one similar. I can’t really talk about it yet. 💔
But I love the phrase “economical with the truth.”3 -
"Oh, I must have missed! But, I mean as long as I did..."1
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This one is kinda funny, because it didn't even make sense. Damn I felt embarrassed when I thought about it as I lay in bed for an extra hour, and then had to show my lying face at work.
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People on here have told me I’m “stunning” and “hot”. But then I went to the gas station and said I don’t have to pay for this candy bar, I’m stunning. And the dude said...no, I don’t think so. Lies!!!!3
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