Frustrated, even furious

1235712

Replies

  • FerretBuellerr
    FerretBuellerr Posts: 468 Member

    But this where common sense steps in.

    I'm terribly sorry, but I think you're really lacking it in :laugh:

    ETA: Okay, maybe not common sense per say, but I think you're just being WAAAAAAAAAYYYY too stubborn, and being very hypercritical to what everyone is saying. Don't be so defensive, and nod and agree with a difference in perspective once in a while - it could help you in the long run in many ways.

    Now this thread is just hilarious to see what excuses you keep responding with.
  • PikaKnight
    PikaKnight Posts: 34,971 Member
    If you are looking for other ideas beside calorie counting then....why ask MFP? It's a calorie counting website. you'd do better to try forums that aren't based on a calorie counting tool.

    To be honest, I was under the impression this was more like a place of support for people who are trying to lose weight, get in shape, and be healthy, generally speaking - regardless of the specific method they use to reach these goals.
    I did not realize it had a "religious cult" dimension and that only those who zealously log their food intake every day can participate.

    I respectfully specified from the beginning that calorie counting doesn't work for me, personally. This should certainly not give people license to assume that anyone for whom calorie logging doesn't work is "lazy", "stubborn" or just all-around an "unreasonable" person. Neither should people assume that just because their schedule and family structure appears to be largely the same with someone else's, that means they are equally busy. Despite all of us being generally busy nowadays, there are incredibly variations in the amount of "business" and pressures each of us deals with.

    FOR ME - and again, I emphasize FOR ME!! - calorie counting is not just unpractical and time consuming (yes, I have tried it on this very site and it is very time consuming), but also psychologically unhealthy. I do not want to obsess over a specific "food journey" or "weight loss" journey every day.

    I want to adjust my eating habit to a point where I eat healthy, I lose all the weight I need to lose, then I just maintain - without thinking much about it.
    Do I expect to be able to stuff my face with pizza and cake all day without giving it a thought - and maintain a healthy weight? Obviously not.

    But this where common sense steps in.

    Wow...insulting the people trying to help. Nice OP. really, we are a cult because we use a forum based on the tool it provides and therefore stick to being able to help based on that tool? Ummmm......

    Best of luck OP.
  • wisdomfromyou
    wisdomfromyou Posts: 198 Member
    OP,

    I looked closely at your profile pic. I would be less worried about your calories and more worried about the fact that your face is devoid of a mouth, nose or eyes!

    On the Net, I prefer my face disfigured. :-)
  • PikaKnight
    PikaKnight Posts: 34,971 Member
    ......
  • shayemimi
    shayemimi Posts: 203 Member

    I want to adjust my eating habit to a point where I eat healthy, I lose all the weight I need to lose, then I just maintain - without thinking much about it.

    I wish it was possible, and maybe it is, to lose all the weight and then maintain, without thinking much about it. If it was, none of us would be here, and I think that's what everyone is trying to tell you. If logging doesn't work for you, or you can't work it into your day, find something that does...BUT I'm pretty sure your going to have to think about it. A LOT. You are worth it tho, don't you think?

    I hope you find the motivation you need to do this, for you. It's gonna take hard work either way...Good luck! :D
  • jen81uk
    jen81uk Posts: 177 Member
    I log out of habit now. I also do it to add alcohol or a big meal the day after if I know I'm having one to let me think about better options for the day. I could easily maintain my weight now as I'm so used to the portion sizes. I've maintained for a year and know its now exercises turn but we do not Seem to be friends! I have been signed up on here for over 2 years but have only used it since January... I maintained before fine but like chatting to people and generally noseying at their diaries. Add me, I much prefer this site now I use it as a networking tool to meet people. I also have some good eggs of friends my list who are not too pious or in your face! Xx
  • AmyRhubarb
    AmyRhubarb Posts: 6,890 Member
    I have found that with the many cooked-from-scratch foods I eat it is simply not practical to calculate how may calories my portion represents. I don't eat food that comes from labeled packages and for me it would just take way, way to long to figure out exactly how many calories a certain bite has.
    Then you must not want it bad enough. :huh:

    Practical schmactical - the recipe creator is a super easy way to put together recipes for foods that you make from scratch. I just entered tonight's dinner before I read this topic. Took me all of five minutes, and now it's in there for the next time I make it. And it's easy to go in and adjust the number of servings, or change an ingredient if it's a little different next time. Yes, it takes a little time the first time to enter it (five minutes? tragic! :tongue: ) but then it's saved your Recipes and easy to use from here on out.

    It sounds like food is your number one issue, but you don't want to take the time to count calories, enter recipes, or take a few extra steps to narrow in on figuring out your intake. The SWAG method (Scientific Wild-*kitten* Guessing - which is good for estimating unknown restaurant cals on occasion, but not every day!) obviously isn't working for you, so it's time to make a change. Or don't, and remain frustrated and furious - your choice.

    Good luck!
  • shayemimi
    shayemimi Posts: 203 Member
    oops lol

    @Joyjoy

    I love your profile pic!

  • To be honest, I was under the impression this was more like a place of support for people who are trying to lose weight, get in shape, and be healthy, generally speaking...

    It is. But you're not that person.

    Any grown person who eats 900-1200 cals (apparently, since you don't count them) a day consistently is hurting themselves and most likely needs more help than a calorie counting website could possibly provide.
  • Mainebikerchick
    Mainebikerchick Posts: 1,573 Member

    I am a creature of extremes, on the passionate and high-strung side, I love food and have a naturally large appetite. :-(

    Given this, you really should be counting your calories and should log daily. You've tried things your way and aren't seeing the difference you were hoping for. So, give logging a try. It works for me and LOTS of other people here on MFP.

    Good luck! :flowerforyou:
  • AmyRhubarb
    AmyRhubarb Posts: 6,890 Member
    Just noticed the OPs username - wisdomfromyou.....you've gotten quite a bit of great wisdom from people here who are doing it right - I'd take it and run with it! Live up to your username! :flowerforyou:
  • pinkstp
    pinkstp Posts: 220 Member
    Ditch the scale. Despite people saying 2# is impossible fat gain and you refuting that you are reading what everyone is saying and quasi-agreeing, it's entirely too much back and forth coming from you to figure out what you're actually agreeing with or just blatantly ignoring. So ditch the scale.

    Measure your progress by how your clothes fit, by using a measuring tape; weight is not the end all be all. Second to that, I would suggest maybe spending your exercise time in the weight room (although you would have to specify what it is exactly about yourself that you are trying to change - and weight isn't an option for that answer. Tone? Add muscles? What are you trying to get out of YOUR specific journey?).

    If you're not going to track, I would troll the forums for general fitness and nutrition tips but I probably wouldn't (as you may surmise from all the responses) advertise that calorie counting doesn't work and don't play nicely with others (on a calorie counting site... insane? maybe. cult-like? maybe. effective? totally).

    Additionally, I would consider seeking therapy. Having an addictive or obsessive/compulsive personality can make this journey a living nightmare, especially if you're making body image remarks (like you are). Being healthy is one thing but once you start putting out a scent that smells even vaguely like thinspo talk, it's time to find someone to help.
  • wisdomfromyou
    wisdomfromyou Posts: 198 Member

    Wow...insulting the people trying to help. Nice OP. really, we are a cult because we use a forum based on the tool it provides and therefore stick to being able to help based on that tool? Ummmm......

    No - if you read the thread, the insults were directed towards me: lazy, stuborn - because I don't do calorie logging.

    Refusing to adopt a certain method of losing weight is not an insuilt. Calling soomeone lazy is, especiually when knowing virtually nothing about their day to day lives, about their commitments, obligations and schedule.

    It sounds like a cult not because you use a tool provided by a forum, but because you resort to personal attacks if someone does not use said tool.
    It sounds like an "if you're not with us, you're against us" type of place.
    I do understand that many people are excited about this method, about being able to measure exactly what they eat, and about attaching numbers to bites.

    I am not and I refuse to leave this way. I have lost 29 pounds so far without calorie logging. I hope I will be able to continue to lose 20 more pounds until I reach my 144 goal - ALSO without calorie logging.

    It is indeed frustrating to always eat below saturation level but it looks like this is the way it works.

    Thanks a lot for all the inputs...particularly to those who have provided non-judgemental feed-back.
  • NeverCatchYourBreath
    NeverCatchYourBreath Posts: 197 Member
    I feel like you don't really have much of an understanding of the human body if you think those two pounds are FAT whenever you eat "just a bit more" than what you normally eat.

    I think that the fact you believe calorie counting is a "huge waste of time" is going to hurt you in the long run. You're always going to be in a state of hunger eating the way you are and trying to lose weight the way you are. You have to try counting calories and seeing what you're really eating. If you're always so upset about those two poounds why don't you jump on MFP (since that's what this website is for) and COUNT those calories and see what you actually put into your body that day. Then, on a day when you feel you did good, count those. And compare. I think you'd be shocked, honestly.

    Listen, you aren't any different than the rest of us. It's not possible to gain two pounds of fat out of 3 days of eating "not so great." The scale doesn't tell you how much fat youv'e gained so you have to stop being so heavily reliant on it.

    Just try counting for a bit. And if you don't want to do that because you feel as though your brain is so darn accurate that you don't need it. Then have fun with your state of hunger.
  • PikaKnight
    PikaKnight Posts: 34,971 Member
    oops lol

    @Joyjoy

    I love your profile pic!


    Hahahaha




    No



    Just kidding :tongue: Thank you! :flowerforyou:
  • SezxyStef
    SezxyStef Posts: 15,267 Member
    If you are looking for other ideas beside calorie counting then....why ask MFP? It's a calorie counting website. you'd do better to try forums that aren't based on a calorie counting tool.

    To be honest, I was under the impression this was more like a place of support for people who are trying to lose weight, get in shape, and be healthy, generally speaking - regardless of the specific method they use to reach these goals.
    I did not realize it had a "religious cult" dimension and that only those who zealously log their food intake every day can participate. You really didn't just go there???????? REALLY

    I respectfully specified from the beginning that calorie counting doesn't work for me, personally. This should certainly not give people license to assume that anyone for whom calorie logging doesn't work is "lazy", "stubborn" or just all-around an "unreasonable" person. Neither should people assume that just because their schedule and family structure appears to be largely the same with someone else's, that means they are equally busy. Despite all of us being generally busy nowadays, there are incredibly variations in the amount of "business" and pressures each of us deals with.

    FOR ME - and again, I emphasize FOR ME!! - calorie counting is not just unpractical and time consuming (yes, I have tried it on this very site and it is very time consuming), but also psychologically unhealthy. I do not want to obsess over a specific "food journey" or "weight loss" journey every day.

    I want to adjust my eating habit to a point where I eat healthy, I lose all the weight I need to lose, then I just maintain - without thinking much about it.
    Do I expect to be able to stuff my face with pizza and cake all day without giving it a thought - and maintain a healthy weight? Obviously not.

    But this where common sense steps in.

    No you expect to be able to come and ask advice and when given the same advice over and over tell us we are cult like...

    That's where common sense took a vacation....

    If you wish to loose weight then maintain without thinking much about it.....without logging calories and assuming your are eating 1200-1500 a day and can't figure out why you aren't loosing then[start sarcasm] I suggest you keep doing what you are doing as you apparently know what works best for YOU YOU YOU :noway: :noway: :noway:
    /end sarcasm
  • NeverCatchYourBreath
    NeverCatchYourBreath Posts: 197 Member
    I am not and I refuse to leave this way. I have lost 29 pounds so far without calorie logging. I hope I will be able to continue to lose 20 more pounds until I reach my 144 goal - ALSO without calorie logging.

    You lost 29 pounds without logging, but you aren't happy with the WAY you lost it.

    I haven't read ANY other responses to your OP, but, I'm simply giving you an alternative that I've seen work over and over again. Seems to me like if you hate the METHOD you're using for losing weight that you would attempt another one. That's all.
  • HappyStack
    HappyStack Posts: 802 Member
    I do not want to obsess over a specific "food journey" or "weight loss" journey every day.

    It seems like you're already being quite obsessive over the same thing.

    Why would you want to force yourself to be miserable and continue with something that obviously isn't working?

    Yes it takes time and effort to log your food, it also takes time and effort to continually do the wrong thing. Every day you sit there frustrated with your lack of progress is a day you could spend building up a personal food list here.
    And hey, the mobile app comes with a nifty barcode scanner to make that stuff even easier and quicker! even if your food packages don't have NI, surely they have a barcode?
  • miqisha
    miqisha Posts: 1,534 Member
    You really should think of counting calories, especially if you are eating as clean as you say, then there isn't that much calories in veggies and unless you are weighing your meat, you may not be eating a significant amount.

    You really should give the site your 100% and you may be surprised that you are probably even eating way less than you even think. I eat relatively good, I follow a Paleo lifestyle and I count calories because I want to ensure I have enough calories each day, especially with the workout I do. You might be surprised at what you find.

    Apart from eating enough, make sure you are eating often enough, by the time you feel hungry it is probably too late, because you are probably putting your body in starvation mode so when it does get the food it holds onto it and stores as fat. May want to try and get int he habit of eating every 2-4 hours

    Good luck!!!!!
  • Calliope610
    Calliope610 Posts: 3,783 Member
    I have been following this thread (I know, I'm a glutton for punishment) and I still don't know what the OP is looking for.
  • pinkstp
    pinkstp Posts: 220 Member
    I have been following this thread (I know, I'm a glutton for punishment) and I still don't know what the OP is looking for.

    She directly asked if your body ever adjusts to starvation mode and allows you to continue to lose weight (on two occasions, that I can recall). And since most people here don't advocate (nay, abhor) starvation, I'm not sure she's going to get that answer from us :)
  • HappyStack
    HappyStack Posts: 802 Member
    you are probably putting your body in starvation mode so when it does get the food it holds onto it and stores as fat. May want to try and get int he habit of eating every 2-4 hours

    I could cry, I really could.
  • ZombieEarhart
    ZombieEarhart Posts: 320 Member

    I want to adjust my eating habit to a point where I eat healthy, I lose all the weight I need to lose, then I just maintain - without thinking much about it.

    How are you going to achieve this goal? Most people here have the same goal, and we have tools and smaller action goals that can be used to achieve this big goal. It sounds like you have a nebulous desire (be fit and healthy) and the only action goal you're willing to adhere to is to guestimate calories and undereat.

    You say you want to eat intuitively, but what I think you're not hearing is that you have to build that "intuition" with specific tools and habits. Which takes both time (yes, there is no getting around it) and a willingness to hear and consider the experiences of people who have lost weight.

    I say this with sympathy- I came to this site with plenty of kooky, disordered ideas about how to lose weight- I thought that dedication meant dedication to deprivation, and I've been pleasantly surprised to learn that I'm wrong. And I'm pretty willing to just straight up tell you, OP, your thinking and way of approaching your goals right now are dead wrong. Best of luck, take good care of yourself.
  • I have been following this thread (I know, I'm a glutton for punishment) and I still don't know what the OP is looking for.

    She's looking for someone who has a secret way to not eat, not exercise, not be hungry and still make the perfect body appear.

    Wonder if they'll show up.
  • histora
    histora Posts: 287 Member
    If you are looking for other ideas beside calorie counting then....why ask MFP? It's a calorie counting website. you'd do better to try forums that aren't based on a calorie counting tool.
    To be honest, I was under the impression this was more like a place of support for people who are trying to lose weight, get in shape, and be healthy, generally speaking - regardless of the specific method they use to reach these goals.
    I did not realize it had a "religious cult" dimension and that only those who zealously log their food intake every day can participate.

    Ma'am, you keep using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means. This is like me coming to a Weight Watchers meeting and then throwing a fit because they expected me to use their points system and weigh in once a week.
    I respectfully specified from the beginning that calorie counting doesn't work for me, personally. This should certainly not give people license to assume that anyone for whom calorie logging doesn't work is "lazy", "stubborn" or just all-around an "unreasonable" person. Neither should people assume that just because their schedule and family structure appears to be largely the same with someone else's, that means they are equally busy. Despite all of us being generally busy nowadays, there are incredibly variations in the amount of "business" and pressures each of us deals with.

    You did not give reasons why it doesn't work. You gave reasons why you don't want to. There is a difference, oddly enough. I think a good example would be your constant hunger and irritability vs actually losing weight in a healthy and enjoyable manner. YOU ARE NOT THE ONLY BUSY PERSON ON THIS PLANET. You created your own schedule, so either defecate or get off the pot.
    FOR ME - and again, I emphasize FOR ME!! - calorie counting is not just unpractical and time consuming (yes, I have tried it on this very site and it is very time consuming), but also psychologically unhealthy. I do not want to obsess over a specific "food journey" or "weight loss" journey every day.

    You already spent all the time it would ave taken you to log your food sitting in this forum arguing with everyone about why you are such a special snowflake that nothing we advised, advice you actually asked for, will work. My 7 year old often does that, and he's just now getting the idea that if he just does the work without grumbling, its over before he knows it.
    I want to adjust my eating habit to a point where I eat healthy, I lose all the weight I need to lose, then I just maintain - without thinking much about it.
    Do I expect to be able to stuff my face with pizza and cake all day without giving it a thought - and maintain a healthy weight? Obviously not.

    If this worked, none of us would be overweight, would we? I don't know how to explain it to you any more clearly without breaking out the crayon box, but here I go again: you have to put effort in to gain reward. You can not just *wish* yourself thin. And in regards to obsessing, you are already obsessing. You slave over these gourmet meals that are nearly impossible to log, just so you can eat less. You are obsessively arguing about how little you can eat without becoming an ill person, which draws unintentional irony from the fact that you came here because of a health scare.
    But this where common sense steps in.

    One would think, yet here you are explaining why nothing will work for you!!
  • FerretBuellerr
    FerretBuellerr Posts: 468 Member
    I have been following this thread (I know, I'm a glutton for punishment) and I still don't know what the OP is looking for.

    Not advice that differs from her own perspectives, that's for sure :indifferent:
  • BeachIron
    BeachIron Posts: 6,490 Member
    I have been following this thread (I know, I'm a glutton for punishment) and I still don't know what the OP is looking for.

    She's looking for someone who has a secret way to not eat, not exercise, not be hungry and still make the perfect body appear.

    Wonder if they'll show up.

    And some wonder why snake oil salesmen make money . . .
  • wisdomfromyou
    wisdomfromyou Posts: 198 Member
    I have been following this thread (I know, I'm a glutton for punishment) and I still don't know what the OP is looking for.

    She directly asked if your body ever adjusts to starvation mode and allows you to continue to lose weight (on two occasions, that I can recall). And since most people here don't advocate (nay, abhor) starvation, I'm not sure she's going to get that answer from us :)

    I would still want to know.
    What happens if you keep going like that - eating in such a way that you are always slightly hungry?
  • auddii
    auddii Posts: 15,357 Member
    I admit, I haven't read most of the responses. Some of the people have been saying that you may be eating more than you think, but if you're gaining on a *slight* splurge of 1500 calories, you are not putting on fat. You seem to have developed a very unhealthy relationship with food.

    GoKaleo has just done a series of dieting and when it doesn't work. The first post in the series sounds like it was written specifically for you. I'd recommend you give it a read and then check out the rest of the series:

    http://gokaleo.com/2013/08/16/what-to-expect-when-you-stop-dieting-part-1-who-is-this-post-for/
  • PRMinx
    PRMinx Posts: 4,585 Member
    If you are looking for other ideas beside calorie counting then....why ask MFP? It's a calorie counting website. you'd do better to try forums that aren't based on a calorie counting tool.

    To be honest, I was under the impression this was more like a place of support for people who are trying to lose weight, get in shape, and be healthy, generally speaking - regardless of the specific method they use to reach these goals.
    I did not realize it had a "religious cult" dimension and that only those who zealously log their food intake every day can participate.

    I respectfully specified from the beginning that calorie counting doesn't work for me, personally. This should certainly not give people license to assume that anyone for whom calorie logging doesn't work is "lazy", "stubborn" or just all-around an "unreasonable" person. Neither should people assume that just because their schedule and family structure appears to be largely the same with someone else's, that means they are equally busy. Despite all of us being generally busy nowadays, there are incredibly variations in the amount of "business" and pressures each of us deals with.

    FOR ME - and again, I emphasize FOR ME!! - calorie counting is not just unpractical and time consuming (yes, I have tried it on this very site and it is very time consuming), but also psychologically unhealthy. I do not want to obsess over a specific "food journey" or "weight loss" journey every day.

    I want to adjust my eating habit to a point where I eat healthy, I lose all the weight I need to lose, then I just maintain - without thinking much about it.
    Do I expect to be able to stuff my face with pizza and cake all day without giving it a thought - and maintain a healthy weight? Obviously not.

    But this where common sense steps in.

    You want to adjust your eating habits, but you don't have an accurate assessment of what those habits are...check.

    You want to eat healthy, but you also want us to support you by agreeing to your low calorie approach....check.

    Everyone is busy, but you are so much busier than everyone else that we can't possibly know what it's like so we can't possibly give you decent advice....check check.

    You know what? I'm on these boards a lot (way more than I should be but, then again, I have time to tie my shoes). Every day I read a story about a single parent (mothers AND fathers) who work, take care of the kids, cook healthy meals and exercise.

    Maybe you should talk to them about busy. You can explain what it's like to have a partner to help with the kids and a job that (I assume) pays well enough to get some help. And then you can try to convince them why you can't do what they can do because you're just so darn busy.