Frustrated, even furious

TheSlorax

I take back what I said about counting calories. I am actually highly concerned at what I am reading.

OP, please seek counseling. The questions you are asking are not normal nor are they healthy.


To the other posters, I would hope you would encourage her to do the same. This is not funny.

ihad

It's probably harder for some than for others, and who knows what would happen if you started logging, or raised calories as some have suggested, but if it were me I would just continue doing what has already been working for you, and resign myself to the fact that yes, it's going to be difficult the whole time. Most things in life that are worth having are hard work. Maintaining my weight is hard for me too, I'm in the same boat as you are where I never eat till I'm totally full and pass up many things that would taste good because if I eat them, I'll probably gain weight. If I have a day where I slip up, usually I'm up 2 lbs the next day (which is usually water weight and goes away pretty quick if I get back on track). Sometimes I wish it were easier, but mostly I welcome the challenge.

You probably nailed it here. Thank you for bringing me back to reality.

So the advice you do want to listen to is "keep doing exactly what you've been doing," even though the vast majority of feedback you've gotten suggests that you need to rethink your approach, and you yourself cannot stand what you're doing after experiencing it only a relatively short time?

The best advice I can give you doesn't have to do anything with diet, exercise, or calorie counting.

I believe you would greatly benefit from openly listening to people's feedback and thoughtfully considering it for a while without immediately arguing why it won't work for you.

Cultivating a little patience would go a long way.

If you can't do that, I think you are going to struggle greatly in achieving and maintaining additional progress, because you are setting some very big and unnecessary obstacles in your own way. It doesn't have to be like this.

WinwillLose

Log your food and your drinks! You might be surprised by what you learn. But you have to track everything, and pay attention to portions. Are you eating enough protein, that keeps me fullest. Keep at it, your body wants to stay at your heavy weight so keep fighting. I lost my first 40 pretty quick, the rest is at a snails pace. I didn't start MFP till after I lost my first 20, two years later I need to loose the last 10 or 15. It's worth the fight, the little gains are annoying but it's usually hormones or sodium at the root of it.

Rays_Wife

In for the whining, moaning, groaning and excuses

PikaKnight

I would suggest counting calories. It's not a waste of time.

^This

How do you know you are eating around 1200-1500 if you aren't weighing/measuring and logging your food? That makes no sense.

TavistockToad

No one has posted a 'flogging a dead horse' gif yet, so my advice is to count your calories!

Calliope610

Trying to lose (or gain) weight without counting calories or logging food is kinda like trying to stick to a budget without balancing your checkbook.

PikaKnight

Unless you're eating a lot of things that aren't in the database (and don't have nutritional data available), it's borderline effortless.

I DO eat a lot of things that aren't in the database. I did track very briefly on this forum in the beginning and it was not something that I wanted to continue doing. Very time consuming for me.
I am not American born and raised and I cook many recipes learned from my mother and grandmother - many adapted to be low in calories (less fat, salt, never sugar). There will be no such dishes in the database - only approximations - which I can do with my own eye balling.
I also sometimes graze just a little bit throughout the day given that I am restraining myself so much with the portions at meal times. Could be a few almonds, flax crackers or a fruit, or a little taste when I cook, etc;
so trying to track all these little bitty things would drive me up the wall.

Let's put it this way: when I buy shoes I favor those that I can slide my foot into in a matter of seconds. Tying shoes instead of sliding and running is time-consuming for me; between work, kids, cooking-from-scratch and trying to go to bed at a reasonable hour, my leisure time is measured in seconds. Yes, I am abusing it and pushing my luck right now by being on this forum.

So it is out of the question that I WILL add an extra "calorie counting" task to my daily routine. There's got to be a way to continue to lose weight without calculating every bit that enter my mouth every day.

You've been doing that and it isn't working. Track your food and come see how things go for 6 weeks. If you aren't progressing, then come to MFP and ask. If you aren't logging, no one is gong to be able to tell you what's going wrong.

fitmomhappymom

I noticed that the ONLY way for me to lose ANY weight at ANY time is to seriously under-eat relative to what my appetite would ideally want. As in serious "calorie reduction".

If I have only one day of more decent eating, as in feeling my stomach reasonably full - I pile two pounds back in a heartbeat.

I do not count calories because it seems like a tremendous waste of time for me. I do, however, have very good understanding of nutrition in general, of calories per various portions, I know very well what foods are higher in calories - and I simply approximate. Generally speaking, I let myself be guided by my stomach.

As soon as I eat around 1200-1500 or a bit more calories ( more like normal people do on a daily basis), not only do I stop losing weight, but I immediately see two pounds piled back up in a heartbeat.

If you dont count calories, how can you possibly know that you are eating 1200-1500 a day? Without knowing what you are eating, and how much of it you are eating I doubt you can pinpoint why you are not seeing any weight loss. I can "eyeball" my daily food and think I'm doing great on calories, until I get to the end of the day and forgot to actually log anything. Thats when reality hits that my internal calorie counting method doesn't work as well as I would have thought.
My advise is actually log and track what you are eating and look at the number of calories that you're actually taking in. If its too few then of course you will see a gain as soon as you start eating at a normal deficit because you have been underfeeding your body. It may turn out you are eating a lot more than you originally thought. Also, I didn't read your whole post, but are you working out at all?

WinwillLose

Also might consider changing your work out, and if you eat the same type of foods switch it up a bit ! That is what I'm going to try next week all new workouts and food.

PikaKnight

1. You don't want to count calories

Correct.

2. You can't make time for exercise

Are you serious? Where did you get this from?

I already am exercising 4-5 times a week, sometimes even 6 times - and quite intensively. There's no room for MORE or more INTENSIVELY - this is what I meant.

By the way, the idea that time is "MADE" has limits. I can be expected to MAKE TIME for extra exercise, just like I am expected to MAKE TIME for extra projects and accomplishments at work, just like I am expected to MAKE TIME for helping children with their academics and to volunteer at their school, just like I am expected to MAKE TIME to cook from scratch, just like I am expected to MAKE TIME for reasonable bed hour. You can only make PRIORITIES out of so many tasks.
When you try to make PRIORITIES out of too many things, some of them will simply no longer be priorities.

3. You don't seem to want to hear that a 2 pound fluctuation is perfectly normal DAY BY DAY even

I heard loud and clear...but that still doesn't explain the fact that I haven't lost any more weight.

How CAN we help?

The purpose of the initial post was to be able to:

1. rant

2. get some extra tips/ideas besides counting calories.

3. Find out what happens if I continue to do what I have been doing. Will the weight eventually come off even if my body goes into thermogenesis or my metabolism becomes slow?

If all you want to do is rant - then there are blogs on MFP for that.

If you are looking for other ideas beside calorie counting then....why ask MFP? It's a calorie counting website. you'd do better to try forums that aren't based on a calorie counting tool.

miniversion

I can understand your feelings about logging your food intake. I too find it too much of an effort to do daily, my reasoning is that I do not plan to do it regularly for the rest of my life so I need to learn to live wihout it and not gain weight. I logged for the first time ever years ago, lost about 20 pounds that I gained in 6 years, learned about the number of calories in food and then just lived my life after without logging any food in. 5 years later, gained about 20 lbs and I had to start logging in my calorie intake just to get my mind to pay attention to my eating. I did not do any fasting or eating less during that 5 years, enjoyed all the food as much as I could eat at buffets and fast food almost daily. I'm thinking if only I was not sedentary and exercised the last 5 years I might have gained less. So far logging my food intake is what I think helped me get to the mindset of losing, but I do it now only when I feel like it lol, only 2 days in the last week, lost only half a lb then, but beter down than up Good luck to us.....

wisdomfromyou

Also, I didn't read your whole post, but are you working out at all?

Yes. 4-5 times a week. Sometimes 6.

kiramaniac

So you're asking for a green light to chronically and knowingly starve yourself? Ok, then the answer is no.

What happens if I continue to eat below saturation point (that is, always feeling somewhat hungry?.
I mean, what are the risks I am running?
Stop loosing weight even on a meager amount of calories? If yes, for how long?

99% of the foods I eat ARE very nutritious, so I do get the maximum nutrients I can get out of what I eat.

I saw a link to this article on another MFP thread this weekend. It discusses the changes your body makes in order to preserve energy when you undereat. The little video embedded in the article answers the question you are asking.

http://www.leighpeele.com/starvation-mode

AllonsYtotheTardis

I have found that with the many cooked-from-scratch foods I eat it is simply not practical to calculate how may calories my portion represents. I don't eat food that comes from labeled packages and for me it would just take way, way to long to figure out exactly how many calories a certain bite has.

You know what? That's an excuse. A lazy one at that. I cook from scratch most of the time. I entered my favorite recipes in my recipe section, so it's super easy to use them again and again and again.

If tracking is too much effort, I'm not sure what you expect us to do to help you.

HappyStack

I am just want to be a normal person.
Normal people have their bodies regulated, they eat until they are not hungry anymore, they don't gain any weight and they never log.

I think you might have issues with understanding how "normal" people regulate their weight.

A summary of how they do it is: they don't. They just don't obsess over small details and don't they don't weigh themselves often enough to know that they've gained a smashing total of 2lbs.

On the other end of the spectrum is the "non-normal normal people" who DO obsess over every small detail and either drive themselves mad, or they realise they've gained .5 of a pound in a day and decide to practically starve themselves for a week.

Nobody, ever, in the history of the world has maintained a solid number on the scales every single day of every single week of every single month, even if they're the fittest person you know.

The most helpful advice I can give you is to TAKE a small weight increase, stop making yourself miserable by eating so little and allow your body the chance to self-regulate like "normal" people. Your body is trying to tell you something. Listen to it.

fivethreeone

I'm just insulted that you think you're the busiest person here.

MOST people here have lives and still manage to count calories.

It's a miracle, I know.

DragonSquatter

I'm just insulted that you think you're the busiest person here.

MOST people here have lives and still manage to count calories.

It's a miracle, I know.

^ This.

In the time you've taken to argue about how "time consuming" logging is on here, you could've logged an entire week's worth of food. Or you could just keep doing whatever you're doing that isn't working. Cuz, that should totally give you a more desirable result.

R4eBro

I understand your frustration and desperation but you need to realize you are being highly resistant. You have received numerous responses to help you and are a member of site that provides weight loss strategies spelled out for you. Yet you have replied to almost every person on here with a reason why you cannot or will not follow their advice and you ignore the weight loss parameters set up for you on a weight loss site. What you are doing is not working. If you want change you need to change something.

I've changed my personal eating standards a number of times. I have listened to advice and honestly gave it a good shot before saying that it doesn't work.

You need to track what you are eating. Period. If you don't want to do it forever then don't but right now things are not working and you need to get a clear picture of what you are eating. Maybe for two weeks you can try not cooking so many gourmet meals that have so many ingredients you feel it is impossible and a waste of time to log them.

It would probably also help for you to re-evaluate your goals and make sure they are realistic.

If you would like some ideas and need more information feel free to message me but you really need to be ready to do something that might be out of your comfort zone.

histora

Ma'am, your biggest problem isn't losing weight or counting calories or remembering to blink.

It's that you don't value yourself.

Prioritization is a skill, and you seem to not have it or care to use it. You will not prioritize yourself and your health over the rugrat's school project or 5 mins of sleep. You don't care to change anything but still demand immediate gratification.

If your life is as busy as you claim, it was of your own doing. Get a nanny, an assistant, decline an extra project, hire a tutor, or just take something off your plate. No one can add minutes to the clock, so you need to learn how to use them best. Doing everyone else's jobs and then *****ing and moaning about how you never have any time is useless and pointless.

You have given no actual reason to not count calories aside from "I don't wanna" and "naturally skinny people don't have to". Well, the first is dumb and the second is patently false.

Thankfully, very few people here will pat you on the head and say "Yes, do eat like a freakin rabbit and continue stressing yourself into an early grave".

Get thee to a counselor to discuss your challenges and get a much-needed breath of fresh air.