After 65 lb weight loss.. NOW being called fat?

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  • slim4health56
    slim4health56 Posts: 439 Member
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    Your transformation is truly amazing, and what's most amazing is the difference in your body language between these 65 pounds...look at that smile in the second picture! You have a goal, you're working toward that goal. Don't let any empty-headed, rude, insensitive, shallow person or persons derail you. Really, you're amazing!
  • divacowgirl
    divacowgirl Posts: 54
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    Steph,

    You are fabulous!
    You have worked so hard to get to where you are.
    I am so sorry for the cruelty of mean, jealous people.
    I cannot imagine how I would feel if this had happened to me.
    Find a new friend who shares your interest in fitness.
    You will encourage each other.
    REMEMBER WHO YOU ARE DOING THIS FOR!!!!!!!!!
    You felt great when you exercised, you look so, so happy in your photo, get that happiness back, because, YOU DESERVE IT!!!!
  • xoeva
    xoeva Posts: 209 Member
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    I see you smiling in your '265' picture. Keep smiling. This is your health and your body!

    Those girls are jerks! I've been asked millions of times if I was pregnant - even when I weighed 135 pounds (I'm 5.5 feel)... just because of how my belly sticks out. People can be so stupid...it's something they can't take back...I understand how you are feeling because one time I joined this gym, and on the second day was doing sit ups and the trainer that worked there came up to me and said 'you shouldn't be doing sit ups' I thought he was going to tell me I was doing them wrong, or I should do them at the end of my workout or something...and I asked 'why not?' and he said 'pregnant ladies shouldn't be doing sit ups' I looked him in the eye and said 'I'm not pregnant, I'm here so try to get healthier' . He had an 'ooops' feeling... so I went to the manager and demanded my money back because I told him I wouldn't be able to come back ....and he apologized (the manager) and I went to another gym.... this happened a long time ago and it obviously still bothers me...also co-workers come up to me (in front of other co-workers) to say 'congratulations!!!! I didn't know you were pregnant' "I'm not!".....ooops again... idiots.... but those girls in the gym were probably just jealous that you could go on the treadmill for so long.... I don't know what else to say... but hope this helps. It happens to lots of us and just keep at it and feel good about yourself.
  • Saydra13
    Saydra13 Posts: 6 Member
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    I am so sorry for other peoples behavior. I think you're beautiful! You should be proud of your body and how far you've come. Don't let anything throw you off course. You just have to brush them off and say to yourself, "once I reach my goal, Ill look and feel better than them". And go buy yourself a bathing suit girl!! I am 222 lbs and I jiggle and I wear a bikini because its nicer than being weighed down by a baggy t shirt and shorts. If they don't like the sight they can leave, because this is my body and I'm proud. As you should be!! Congrats on all of your hard work :) Keep it up!
  • ecanales52
    ecanales52 Posts: 74 Member
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    Darlin", you look awesome, and have done an amazing job getting healthy! Why, oh why would you let two idiot, heartless women destroy what you have worked so hard to achieve?? It takes tremendous strength and fortitude to loose all that weight! Take some of that strength and stand up for yourself when the people of this crazy world let you down. When people make rude, heartless comments to others they are only showing their true colors....completely devoid of kindness and compassion. WHY allow them to dictate who you are, your self worth, your ultimate goal. All you have to do is look them straight in the eye, smile, and say...I'm doing an awesome job....now get the hell out of my way!
  • Deipneus
    Deipneus Posts: 1,862 Member
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    the one girl said 'hey.. no offense, but we were wondering how you do it?' I asked do what? and the other girl (while the first one started to laugh) said 'well, you're really, really big... dont you wanna pass out or something?' I was devastated. I just turned around and walked out.. I never did go back.
    I would like this story better if you'd punched her in the throat first. If I were on a jury, you'd be acquitted.

    Congrats on your weight loss. You look great.
  • ilizzyd
    ilizzyd Posts: 24 Member
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    You look wonderful in both pictures but especially at 265 (I am looking at that pic thinking no way is she really 265) Are you really tall?? Don't get discouraged by as$hats and "no offense but you seem too stupid to actually remember to breathe" might have been a good comment??????
  • xoeva
    xoeva Posts: 209 Member
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    I had practically the same thing happen last week. Two uppity little things looked, laughed and then one said to the other (in an uppity, sing-song voice) " I don't think it's woooooorrrr - kkkkking" with a wink and nudge to the other.

    I was THIS close to heaving a barbell at them .... or dissolving into tears ... or walking out ... or walking out and driving to the nearest Taco Bell.

    All those things hurt ME though (except the barbell - pretty sure that would have hurt them), so instead, I took a drink, mopped off my beet-red face to make sure that no tears had escaped and replied "Actually, I've lost more than 100 pounds so it is working. I'm sorry it's not working fast enough to spare your delicate eyes from the disgusting sight of my fatness, so I'll just suggest you check back in another couple months"

    Then I stopped. Didn't say another word. And stared.

    They left

    So keep your head up!

    I love this! :flowerforyou:

    OOOOOHHHHH !!! I loved the part that you stopped, didn't say another word and stared...... cool!
  • nedtoloseme
    nedtoloseme Posts: 98 Member
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    You should feel good about yourself. You've done so well and will continue to do well! I go to a gym where most of the people are very fit. I believe some of them were making fun of me also, but you just have to block them out. Now that I've lost 50 pounds the people who were staring at me and laughing now say nothing, and there are are others who are really supportive who I didn't know were even paying attention. The best revenge is to be successful. Keep going - YOU CAN DO THIS!
  • faithdanyell
    faithdanyell Posts: 30 Member
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    Hi Sweety,
    I am so sorry that you had those experiences and know has the right to treat you that way. I would suggest working on the inside as well as the outside, take some self esteem classes or read a book about how to gain higher self worth. This weight loss journey should be about you and not other people, because you can be a size 0 and someone will call you "fat". I currently weigh more than you do and no one has ever come up to me and said anything rude or disrespectful...and if they did I would let them know what's up. I don't except anyone talking to me in a disrespectful manner...this is what I project. Please don't give up on your journey because of a few rude people, your health and life is worth so much more. If someone says something like those girls said to you, it's okay to tell them they're being rude and it is none of their damn business what you do. Also let the people at work know you do not like those comments and you feel harassed because you are larger. Last tell your friend that you don't like when she refers to you as big and to please stop saying it. I am wishing you all the best. Please feel free to friend me for additional support.
  • McCrabby
    McCrabby Posts: 77 Member
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    I think sometimes we get stuck on the bad stuff that happens, because its almost as though someone out there has just confirmed the most horrible things that we have been telling ourselves for years. We're less likely to hang on to an encouraging smile, or brief word of praise, because it's not a reality in our regular internal dialogue.

    What those girls did was rude. What they said was not helpful or true. Fat is not a state of being, or a permanent attribute. It's easier to lose fat than it is to alter an attitude (especially one that is full of judgement).

    You are beautiful, and have made incredible changes in your life. Try to remember all the positive things that you might brush off throughout your day, and try to make the helpful, encouraging encounters the forefront of your musings.

    You're not here for anyone's viewing pleasure or personal amusement. Sometimes you need to remind them of that.
  • PoisonElix
    PoisonElix Posts: 39 Member
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    the one girl said 'hey.. no offense, but we were wondering how you do it?' I asked do what? and the other girl (while the first one started to laugh) said 'well, you're really, really big... dont you wanna pass out or something?' I was devastated. I just turned around and walked out.. I never did go back.
    I would like this story better if you'd punched her in the throat first. If I were on a jury, you'd be acquitted.

    Congrats on your weight loss. You look great.

    I like the throat punch myself. That would have been awesome. Really though you look amazing and have been doing an awsone job. You should go back to that gym and let karma take care of it for you.
  • annempg
    annempg Posts: 10 Member
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    People can be so mean!
    I am pretty sure these girls were just jealous because they can't run as fast or as long as you can.
    Besides, you look great! :smile: keep up the good work!
  • conniemaxwell5
    conniemaxwell5 Posts: 943 Member
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    Holy cow, 65 pounds made a HUGE difference! Way to go!

    Do NOT let what ANYONE else says make a difference in what you are doing for yourself. People who are insecure in themselves will ALWAYS find something in you (or someone else) to belittle so that they can feel better about themselves. It's adult bullying, plain and simple, and just as unacceptable (but tolerated) as it is for kids. No need to be rude back to people either. You can be the bigger (no pun intended, really) person by smiling and walking away.

    DON'T GIVE UP!!!!
  • AglaeaC
    AglaeaC Posts: 1,974 Member
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    1. They wanted a reaction from you showing hurt and/or anger; don't give it to them. Ignore, tell yourself their minds are clearly more troubled than yours, so you forgive their hatred. They are not worth your time nor energy, so the question is will you use them as an excuse to give up?
    2. Eleanor Roosevelt: "No one can make you feel inferior without your consent." Exchange inferior with other, suitable word.
    3. Your work so far is amazing. Do you believe it is amazing?
  • conniemaxwell5
    conniemaxwell5 Posts: 943 Member
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    Sounds like you let a couple of @ssholes get to you. Unfortunate really, as you said, you were doing great. Why was one comment able to derail all the hard work you had done? I would spend some time in introspection if not counseling to examine why. (And no, I am NOT being snarky, I am completely serious.) This is not on them honey, it's on you.

    I definitely understand what you are saying... but it wasnt just that. that was just the start of it. I broke up with my boyfriend of 11 years in that time also, so that was hard on me, had to move back into my parents with my almost 2 year old who is having a rough time adjusting, i found out my father has two types of cancer, plus he had a minor heart attack... its just on and on. that comment just started it all. I got back into being comfortable being miserable. I'm getting back into good thinking though. Just took some time to get back there. :)

    I just saw this after I posted my first reply. You are dealing with a lot of things at once. Make sure when you're hurting that you reach out for help instead of turning back to old / unhealthy habits. If you don't feel like you have people in your 'real' life that you can trust with those things, you have a great network of people here. Get a solid friends list and let them / us support you when you're in need. Part of this weight loss journey is identifying why we got fat in the first place and healing / correcting those issues. That's the only way we can make the success permanent.

    Feel free to add me as a friend!
  • tmauck4472
    tmauck4472 Posts: 1,785 Member
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    Sadly, they didn't know you before and they don't care. And you have to remember you are doing this for you and you need to continue doing it. Don't let them scare you from the gym. You should have told them to tell all that to the 60 someodd lbs you'd already lost and if they have nothing better to do than to ask stupid questions then they need to get a better life cause theirs suck and reality is theirs does suck and you are trying to make yours better. Don't let haters rule you.
  • ElizaGeorge
    ElizaGeorge Posts: 140 Member
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    Omg! DO NOT give up because I'd b*tches... you look amazing and I would kill to look like you! I hate people sometimes -_-
  • WildlyCurly
    WildlyCurly Posts: 151 Member
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    You look amazing and look like a different person. I was so heartbroken to hear what these bullies said to you. You are beautiful and people want to tear you down, don't listen to them. Just remember how far you have come. People are probably intimidated by your energry and confidence. I have seen that when people lose as much weight as you have, they gain so much confidence and have a beautiful energy and brighness to them. Those bullies see that power in you and they are so intimidated and JEALOUS!
  • megsmom2
    megsmom2 Posts: 2,362 Member
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    I think I'm looking at this incident a little differently. Yes, those girls were tactless and insulting...but you know, I can't help but wonder if what they meant to be asking is..."why can YOU run like this when I can't?" Because they noticed that you were able to do your exercise routine longer and better than they could, and maybe wanted some help on how to develop the level of fitness that you had. Yes, I agree, they were very tactless. Kids can be like that. But is it possible that they weren't being intentionally mean?

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