After 65 lb weight loss.. NOW being called fat?
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Simply put: screw the haters. Who are they to judge? They aren't perfect either. You've made amazing progress so keep your chin up and ignore anyone who doesn't support you 100%! You can do it! By the way, I'm like 190 and I can't run a mile and a half so YOU ROCK!!!0
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There is no cure for stupid unfortunately.....don't let others bring you down..you have done an amazing job and you look great....you need to become your own hero..you have done this by hard work and willpower, it belongs to you don't let them or anyone take this away from you.....you can lose weight, you proved that..and they are stupid and insensitive and there is no cure for that....0
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Don't let a handful of sihtheads sabotage you. You are the owner of your emotions. Laugh at those jerks. "I'll lose the weight, but you'll still be a d*ck!"0
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OP - I think you're being a bit too sensitive on that comment from back in October. As others pointed out, you have PAGES of positive posts and support here. One post by an obvious troll from months ago is NOTHING. Please, ignore it, and if you're going to comment, maybe comment on all the great stuff people are saying! And maybe let us know how it is going for you
I read your post and then some of the replies....look, no matter what, you are still obese. But, you know that you are WAY LESS obese than you were. You know that you are doing the right thing for you. And when we see the starting pic and your 265 pick, we too can see the progress. That's your clue -- you're doing the right thing! Those girls at the gym? They didn't know where you started from. They didn't have a handy picture to see "oh wow, she started even larger and now look at her, she's doing great." So to them, you were just someone fat working out.
Now, should they have commented like that? Uh, probably not. It sounds rude in the telling. Especially if they were laughing. We can't cure people of rudeness or idiocy or meanness, etc. You have control over you and how you react though. Remind yourself that while you're still obese, you're doing the right things, you're making progress, and no one and nothing will derail you. Repeat that over and over to yourself and make it the truth.
Always also bear in mind that they may also be sincere in truly wanting to know. So an answer like "well, it was hard when I was 330, but with 65 pounds gone already, it's getting easier every day." And let it go. If they weren't sincere, it won't matter WHAT you say. If they were, at least you weren't a jerk to them. When I first started, walking up the 3 flights of stairs to where the treadmills were wasn't happening. I took the elevator. I came with all 4 of my teenagers one day and rather than take the stairs, they stayed with me. A woman walked by, saw us waiting, started to go through the door to the stairs and then said "uh, you know there are stairs, right?" and then kept on going. She sounded VERY snarky to me, and I was annoyed but didn't let it get me down. I saw her in the locker room afterwards and I came up to her and asked her nicely why she felt the need to say that. She was instantly mortified. She had meant it as a way to inform, because a lot of people never saw the stairs apparently, because they were through another door. She apologized profusely. I felt better because i asked nicely and didn't attack her first, giving her the benefit of the doubt, and I felt better because I had confronted the situation rather than seethe about it for days, weeks, or months.
So remember - they may have been laughing at something else (or had a weak moment of inappropriate laughing) and they may have been impressed with what you were doing and just immature at how to handle it but wanting to know.
You are doing a great job. Remember that and keep going.0 -
Life will be so much happier if you stop dwelling on the negative. You have 13 pages of wonderful supportive comments. Read those again. Ignore the asshat who deserves to be ignored.0
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I think there is a very sick reality in this country that when a person reaches a certain size due to morbid obesity, the comments (of any type) slow down or stop. People avoid all contact - even the sick insults.
In some crazy way, people who make these comments to you (and posters above/below) who've lost so many pounds feel safe doing so because you've moved from obese to "fat", whereas before, they might never have commented. I'm not saying it's right or even fair, but they feel more comfortable to do it now than before.
I think that's right. I think that is absolutely correct. It's awful, but it's correct.
And I don't know how to keep those comments from hurting. I still don't want to go outside sometimes, even though the last comment I got was years and years ago. I'm so sorry that you got hit with the sh*twagon, as someone else said.0 -
Dude those people are just jealous of the kick *kitten* job you are doing. Do not let them get you down. Its not about what they say or think its all about how you feel and what you want. Keep doing a good job.0
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You are doing an AMAZING thing for yourself! You committed to get healthy! I've been there...I've been called fat and had children say insensitive things to me...it hurts really bad. You are a beautiful worthwhile women! We here are MFP supporting and cheering you on!
I feel the same way. Do this because YOU are going to feel better. There is a big difference between the pics you put up - you've done an amazing job, are pretty, and should not listen to what those girls said. Please don't allow their words to keep going in your head. Fight it, and put good things in their place. Seriously, you look good, and you're going to be so much happier if you keep doing your best to be as healthy as you can. Those girls must have been very insecure themselves to be so bent on making another human being miserable. You can do this!!!!!!0 -
The gym is a joke......and you now know why...As Tony Horton would say other peoples machines..doing the same boring stuff...and people watching people, some are there just to socialize. I don't want anyone to see me push that last rep...spend your gym members on some dum-bells and some work at DVDs.....there are so many out there...And work on your on self discipline.....keep logging you stuff on mfp. And then get ready for the unveiling.......0
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The only thing you can control in life is you - what you DO, what you think, how you respond to out side influences. You can't control anyones comments - you can only control how you react to them. Shrug them off. Give up that negative energy and focus on all of the good! Good people here helping you! Good advice! Good progress!
I agree with a poster from months ago - your 256# pic looks healthier than I do now at 227. Keep it up!!!!0 -
Do not stop. Keep going. It's for you, not them. You are not alone.0
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OP, I think you look great! Ignore the haters--or get them back with comebacks like " Oh, wow, how do YOU do it? I could never be such a vicious little ***** to a complete stranger like that!" You say it with a big smile, and really nicely, as if you're giving them a huge compliment, and then just walk away.
Maybe it'll make them think before they open their sick little mouths next time.
Just my 2 cents.0 -
The gym i used to belong to if management found out about that kind of behavior they would of thrown out the girls and banned them0
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There will always be d!ckheads. Letting them control your happiness is a formula for making yourself miserable. Do what you need to do for you and don't let others' opinions be your excuse for not moving on. You'll never win that game.0
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Some people are just mean (girls at the gym) and little kids don't have a "nice" filter (my kids say stuff to me that hurts my feelings, but they don't mean to they are just stating the obvious, i.e. my belly is big). You are doing an AWESOME job!! You look fabulous! Don't let the others get you down. Only YOU can give up, get back on it and lose that weight. "Don't look back, you're not going that way" You got this!
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Okay, people like looking good. But forget about 'looks'. You are young. The motivator is the money and health issues overweight lbs will cause as you age. Diabetes, heart disease, arthritis. Do you want to remain independent? If you are heavy balance issues on ladders to do your own home chores. Health and quality of life should be first and foremost and who cares about strangers? Look at all the hateful things said to people about race, religion and sexual orientation, so keep going on the road to health for saving your own life. Love yourself.0
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First of all, reading your story I began to tear up, it breaks my heart that people can be so cruel when you are doing what you need to do to increase your cardio vascular health, learn how to work your body and feel better about yourself. I am so sad you were not able to go back to the gym. I encourage you to continue on your journey, looks like your doing amazing and go back to the gym. I wish I had something useful to say about the girls at the gym, but I find myself too upset to say anything constructive about them. Your amazing, do this for yourself...but to answer your original question, no that did not happen to me, no one noticed my weight loss for about the first 50 pounds though.
YOU GOT THIS!!!0 -
You look amazing! Sure, you may still have some more to go, but you are doing it and looking good. Don't ever let anyone stop you from being healthy. Keep up the good work because you are worth it.0
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I definitely do not want any of you to think I don't appreciate every single amazing word you have taken the time to write here. You all are who have gotten me back on my feet and going at it again! (5 more lbs down in a week!!) i was just really upset the other night.. About things not related to weight loss.. And remembered this thread and how amazing the responses were. So I got on to pick myself up, only to read that jerks response as my first. It angered me and I lashed out without thinking. I was being too sensitive, yes. I'm sorry.
Thank you so much for everyone's comments. I am still obese, as someone pointed out.. But I'm getting thinner everyday. And that's more than I could say a year ago!
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Hey everyone! I'm Stephanie. I'm 26, and just recently got back on MFP. I was doing a great job.. really kicking *kitten* at losing weight. I lost 65 lbs in about 6 months, and was not slowing down. I love exercising, I love eating well.. just love the way it makes me feel!
So whats the problem you might ask? Well, shortly after I reached my 65 lb mark of my weight loss, I was at the gym running on the treadmill... was at about a mile and a half, when I looked over and seen a couple of girls looking at me and laughing. I tried to push it out of my mind, telling myself that they weren't laughing at me.. it was just my insecurities getting the best of me. Well, when I was done, I went to the trash to throw away something and they came up to me. the one girl said 'hey.. no offense, but we were wondering how you do it?' I asked do what? and the other girl (while the first one started to laugh) said 'well, you're really, really big... dont you wanna pass out or something?'
I was devastated. I just turned around and walked out.. I never did go back.%
Since then (about 7 months ago), I have very slowly gained 10 lbs back. I have also had 2 people ask me when I was expecting, a child ask me why I was so fat, another child tell me nobody wants to see my fat body in a bathing suit (which is why i do not own tone), and someone at work tell me not to sit in a chair in case it broke. My best friend also is big, and she always says shes happy she has a fat friend because all her other ones are skinny, pretty and perfect.
I dont understand... I NEVER got anything said about my weight when I was 330+ lbs, now that I'm 275 I'm hearing it all the time. I know it should motivate me to keep going, but its like ok.. ive come so far, now what? NOW I get called fat? Its killing me.
has anyone else experienced anything like this before? I dont know what to do... I feel like its pointless to continue.
330
265
What you accomplished is amazing.
Now, with being said you need to work on your confidence and self worth. Do not let some rude strangers stop you from achieving your goals. They are nobody! Forget them. As far as kids they will be kids and I blame their parents for not teaching them manners and also to respect their elders.
You can't go through life or live your life based on what others think or say. It's all about what you think and feel. They aren't relevant. They only have that kind of power if you allow it.
Now pick yourself up and make yourself happy! Got to keep it pushing. Nobody is going to do it for you. Its your life and its up to you to make changes.
You got this! I know that for sure.
edit: glad ur feeling better. Just seen ur response above mine. 0 -
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You look amazing, don't let the comments ruin the progress you have made! There are stupid people in every environment, you are so much better than them :-) X0
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What people "think" about you, is not your business. You're doing great, right?! Feeling better, NSVs out the wazoo?!
Keep going. You can't worry about someone else's insecurities being bounced off you.
You are amazing. Don't ever forget that.0 -
I used to get bullied by some a**hole when I was younger and really fat. He got blown up by a bomb a few years ago in Afghanistan. This might sound morbid, but **** always gets flushed away.
Don't let little punks get in your way of being great. They will always be there on the side, saying this and that, but sooner or later they will lose and you will win.0 -
I just want to let you know, YOU ARE ABSOLUTELY BEAUTIFUL!!!! I would forget those people that are being rude!!! You have lost so much weight, and are now able to live a healthier life, you are doing amazing!!! I don't know you but I am still proud of you!!!!!!0
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You look amazong! You inspire me, please don't give up.0
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Also I have some tips about dealing with bullies like that. I've seen it all, and I know some of the worst things you can do and some of the best things you can do:
1) Never challenge them to do what you are doing. Never say, "Well, can you do it?" Because if they can, it just buries you even more.
2) Don't use scripted comebacks. They will know you planned ahead and realize that you are mad.
3) Never try to challenge their intellect, especially when they are in a group, because intellect means nothing to them.
4) Do not fight them. Bullies often know how to fight.
5) They are often not hiding their own faults. They are not jealous. They are just **** people who don't have anything else to do. Don't try and rationalize why they are acting the way they are.
6) Ignore them completely until they die. Then you can say whatever you want to them at the open casket.
Follow those steps and you're golden.0 -
Steph you're a pretty girl and you look good right now (not just saying that). Just keep going until you get to where *you* want to be.
People are dip ****s. I understand how it would get you down. I'd feel the same way although these days I'm more inclined to swear at people for not keeping their stupid little mouths shut.
Just get angry more. It's probably not good for you but it feels better than being hurt.0 -
RE: scripted comebacks, I actually think having a generic, forceful comeback 'in the chamber', ready to fire is a good thing. A good and quick "f*** off" or "shut up" right after someone says something dumb is a good start.0
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I am so sorry to hear that! No one, I repeat, no one has the right to judge you. You worked your *kitten* off to get to where you are! Those girls don't know that, they don't know you have made a huge effort to lose the 65 lb but you do! Don't give up hun, you will hate yourself for it. Don't let some thin b*tches discourage you and if anyone ever questions you, tell them how much weight you've lost and ask them if they could say the same! That should shut them up! 65 lb is a lot of weight hun. Keep at it and prove all those who doubted you or laughed at you that you can do it! Don't let them win! You'll always have someone on here to support you if it's needed. x
Edit: I just saw your recent post on here. Well done! I'm glad you are getting back on track! Don't worry, I'm overly sensitive too. :P0
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