Less Alcohol - MAY 2020 - One Day at a Time
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forestdweller1 wrote: »Sigh....Can we have a June page now ?? I'm heartily sick of the way my May has gone.
Not trolling for hugs, just venting.
I'm ready for June too,June 2021 that is! I'm soooo over this year and how most of it's been a waste and full of fear, ANXIETY,stress,sadness and heartache, although I haven't been drinking I still have that"emptiness" feeling that drinking gives me, hopefully heading into next month will be an upturn in how things have been going ((hugs)) 6:39 am in Vegas another 24,hope everyone makes the most outta this day💗
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My wife decided to get back on the weight-loss wagon and told me to that I had to quit drinking on workweek nights while she was "being good." Game on!
Night 1 - slept like a baby.
Night 2 - last night was awful.
Please wish me luck tonight! I have done this before and it seemed that after 5-7 days I was sleeping like a teenager on a rainy Saturday morning. Probably need to be dry through the weekend to get to the magical day 5-7.
Suggestions welcome...12 -
@looneycatblue You didn't blow a streak, you set a personal record. In just 4 more days you can beat it! In any event, the idea is to drink less so you already did that for this month when you consider your first post mentioned you were drinking every day. Therefore, you are already a winner. Not sure how I would react in your situation with the Step as her behaviors are nothing you can control. You can control how you react to her behavior or your hub's response. I personally hate conflict and am one to give a response that is totally opposite of the way I feel. i.e.: smile or laugh instead of shout or cry; respond with a pleasant, "Well how about that?"; or - "You know, it's beautiful outside. Think I will go for a walk..." Sounds like you could use a big batch of endorphins right now. So that walk (away from the bottle) might be your best option. Hope this helps in some small way. Sheila
Thank you for the kind words... I have done more that 3 in a row before, but it was maybe more than a year ago. I do not like conflict or drama either, and neither does her Father... but my Step-Daughter seems to thrive on it. I think that she, like many others in her generation are too focused on social media, and comparing their own lives to it. What she doesn't understand is that most people are posting just the fun & positive stuff about their lives, and you cannot see the whole picture.
Last night was much better, no drama. I think sometimes she maybe bipolar, her mood swings are really out of control. Day 1... AF
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forestdweller1 wrote: »@looneycatblue thanks for the hug, anyway !! Back attcha (((
)))
I used to write long letters about problems that seemed without solution...then rip & burn or flush before anyone else could see them. Like, IMMEDIATELY. Sometimes the writings spawned some good work arounds. At the very least I got to speak my mind without picking a fight or offending anyone.
Your comment about a counselor might be just the ticket. A pastor ? A trusted friend who could act as a life coach for your perpetual teenager ?
No money to move out ? Surely she has a job ? All my daughters flapped their way out of the nest by age 18, and landed feather side up, so I got no advice. They were "Children Of Divorce", and survived.
ventured into the beer store [first store of any kind] this week and replenished my AF beer supply. June will be looking up !!
I love the idea about the long letters, I really could have blown things up more, if I followed through on what my emotions were telling me to do. Lucky for me, I wasn't so drink impaired that I thought things through, decided to hold off on saying anything more until I slept on it.
She did have a job, working at a child daycare center for minimum wage, and only about 20 / hours per week. She was furloughed back in March when all of this Covid 19 hit. Hopefully they will re-open soon, maybe sometime in June or July. Then we will see if she an hold onto this job, I think 6 months is the longest she has stayed with a company. She didn't work at all in 2019, just started this job in February. She has not gone back to school since High School, and barely graduated then. She has a hard time staying committed, and jumps from one idea to another quickly. She lived on her own for a while a couple of years ago, with roommates, but that blew-up, she just doesn't know how to deal with any issues or people. This is a problem.
Day 1... AF last night.
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@looneycatblue ...my heart hurts for you. A person will change only when they want to, not for someone else, or even if they need to.
Only half kidding, have you threatened to book an appearance on Dr. Phil ??
Congrats on the Day 1. I see ya' , and will join you for Day 2 tonight. Again. One. More. Time.7 -
@forestdweller1 You are funny! Yes, planning on Day 2 AF! 5
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19 AF days/27 days....behaved myself last night....even went to Trader Joes yesterday and didn't buy wine....the little dark chocolate peanut butter cups were more appealing...
@Bari_Tone: I remember nights 2-5 not drinking being a really tough challenge. I thought I was going to die. It was either nightmares all night long or waking up at 1am with palpitations and not falling back to sleep. My evening prep was maybe not the best solution but I managed with getting to bed early, eating chocolate, healthy carbs for dinner, lots of mineral water, and an occasional melatonin gummy or two to get me sleepy. During the day, I tried to exhaust myself with exercise, not sure if that worked but mentally I thought it would help sweat out the toxins and speed up the process....6 -
Lots of great stuff going on in here. And big welcome to our new posters.
Getting close to the end of the month (agreed need to get to June and out of May) which means stay tuned for the new link to the June Less Alcohol Thread coming soon.
Big hugs to you @Doxmum. I have had close relatives with the same issue. Not easy to watch. I know it is as hard on them knowing things are different. Be strong.🙇♀️
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Three glasses of wine while watching the Great British Baking Show and I’m about to run to the kitchen and bake up a storm! Luckily the wine is making me sluggish, bc I’m sure I’d make a mess with nothing delicious to show for it. The rest of the bottle is calling for me, but I’m determined to sit tight and drool over the TV bakers’ creations!👨🍳9
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As usual, I am going to try for 16-20 AF days for the month.
My goal used to be 8AF days per month, I am pretty happy to try to cruise between 16-20 so as not to put too much pressure on myself. If I get more that is just gravy.
I managed 22AF days somehow in April!!
Thanks @MissMay for keeping us going : - )
Saturday May 16 - 3 drinks. Didn't make it to my 2 AF days in between, but no regrets whatsoever.
Sunday May 17 - AF - Felt like having drinks, but resisted.
Monday May 18 - AF - Fancied a drink, delayed enough times to resist.
Tuesday May 19 - AF - Felt like having drinks, also felt like having Ribs or Pizza, but didn't have any of those, I can have them another day.
Wednesday May 20 - AF - Another day of avoiding alcohol. I might have drinks tomorrow or Saturday, or both. Getting close to my 16AF days.
Thursday May 21 - 3 drinks. Rainy, cold and windy here. It was really nice to have a Cointreau mixed with Bailey's, and some Port Salut. Calling this a "cheat" day. Really nice.
Friday May 22 - AF - I felt rough all day from those 3 drinks last night. I guess that I am not used to it anymore.
Saturday May 23 - AF - I have some guys coming to work on my property tomorrow, so I want to be bright and alert. Otherwise I would have had drinks today.
Sunday May 24 - A bunch of drinks and music making with the work crew. Drinking some water now, hoping not to puke, and hoping not to feel like *kitten* tomorrow. I like the drinks while they are happening, but the after effects are not really good. Could be that I have grown to be not used to it anymore.
Monday May 25 - AF - I didn't feel great today after drinks yesterday. I pretty much don't eat during the daytime except for berries and coffee in the morning, so when I do indulge in alcohol it it usually on an empty stomach. I don't feel lousy the next day every time I have drinks, but moreso than I used to.
Tuesday Mary 26 - AF - Felt like having drinks after going very hard in my yard today. Yep, the 6 minute trick repeated quite a few times. As I look at my posts, I didn't feel well the next day the last 2 times out of 3 that I had drinks.
Wednesday May 27- 3 drinks. No particular reason except that I worked my butt off in my yard all day and felt like having a couple of drinks. Trying to accomplish as much as I can around the house and garden before I have to go back to work next Monday. Peppers and Tomatoes are all in the ground now : - )
Thursday May 28 - AF - I woke up feeling fine today, so 2 hangover days out of 4 drinks days. Maybe I drank more water after my drinks. Not planning any more drinks days for the remainder of the month, mostly because I would like to see a 1 pound weight loss this month.
20AF days out of 28 days so far7 -
All that was planned was a quick peek at tomorrow's weather report, and got sucked into cable news. In 70-odd years on this planet I've seen it all before...just another horrible repeat. Well, maybe the kids skateboarding through tear gas is new.
Poured a generous measure of Amaretto into a glass...stared at it...stared at the TV...the Amaretto stared back...poured the spirits back into the bottle...grabbed Catpuccino, and I'm going up to bed, letting the world go to Hell in it's very own handbasket.
Still AF on Day 2. [because I told @looneycatblue I would be].12 -
Ok gang, as promised, the link to our June thread. Come one come all to support those who want to DRINK LESS
https://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/discussion/10798277/less-alcohol-june-2020-one-day-at-a-time#latest5 -
Oops - missed the check-in last night. AF 10/27 and 7/8 on Take a Break.5
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@forestdweller1 I also thought of you and our commitment to get 1 more day in... it was tough, my husband was cooking dinner, and therefore drinking a couple of beers... he then moved on and poured himself a shot of Crown... which he knows I hate, so lucky for me it wasn't offered. I was in the middle of my 10 minute time-out, waiting for my own urges to pass... actually took about 20, and it worked, I was able to pass on pouring myself a "little" (((lot))) of something. We went for a nice walk before sitting down for dinner, which was fun, because I was totally sober, and my husband a little buzzed, which got him talking up a storm. He is usually very reserved.
I am happy that you got another day in too. I am hoping to get to 3 again, being Friday night, this might be a little tough. However my weigh-in day is tomorrow, extra motivation not to indulge... I will most likely have a couple on Saturday, just hope it won't trigger my back into nightly drinking mode.
Happy Friday Everyone!
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20 AF days/28 days...Happy Friday! Been busy putting in the miles - walking and running outside this week...like a lot, at least 7 miles minimum daily...it's so good for me....free therapy and it makes me happy too....now if only travel restrictions could be lifted and I could get on a plane to do the tour du mont blanc hike, that would be nice. Or just do sections of it as day hikes and spend the evenings at rentals and eat really good food. From there head over to Provence and eat some good mediterranean seafood near the ocean. Dreaming.....8
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AF 11/29 for May and 8/9 on Take a Break. Busy day getting my "look" back. To quote Lizzo: "Hair toss, check my nails. Baby tell me how you doin'? Feelin' good as hell!" Today: Brow tint, facial, pedi. Still need a haircut, botox & a massage
Have a great weekend everyone!6 -
As usual, I am going to try for 16-20 AF days for the month.
My goal used to be 8AF days per month, I am pretty happy to try to cruise between 16-20 so as not to put too much pressure on myself. If I get more that is just gravy.
I managed 22AF days somehow in April!!
Thanks @MissMay for keeping us going : - )
Monday May 25 - AF - I didn't feel great today after drinks yesterday. I pretty much don't eat during the daytime except for berries and coffee in the morning, so when I do indulge in alcohol it it usually on an empty stomach. I don't feel lousy the next day every time I have drinks, but moreso than I used to.
Tuesday Mary 26 - AF - Felt like having drinks after going very hard in my yard today. Yep, the 6 minute trick repeated quite a few times. As I look at my posts, I didn't feel well the next day the last 2 times out of 3 that I had drinks.
Wednesday May 27- 3 drinks. No particular reason except that I worked my butt off in my yard all day and felt like having a couple of drinks. Trying to accomplish as much as I can around the house and garden before I have to go back to work next Monday. Peppers and Tomatoes are all in the ground now : - )
Thursday May 28 - AF - I woke up feeling fine today, so 2 hangover days out of 4 drinks days. Maybe I drank more water after my drinks. Not planning any more drinks days for the remainder of the month, mostly because I would like to see a 1 pound weight loss this month.
Friday May 29 - AF - I did the 6 minute wait quite a few times. Worked my butt off in the yard again in the hot sun today. At one point I opened the fridge and there was a Labatt .5 (na beer). I had that on my front porch in the shade, and it did the trick! I will have to get some more of those. I am never a beer drinker, but it tasted good and really quenched my thirst for a treat drink after such physical hot labour. (I would have had a rum punch). I said that I was planning not to have any more drinks days the rest of the month. 2 more to go.
21AF days out of 29 days so far7 -
So losing a big post that I was writing in here is, is more than reason to drink😣
Let me try this again. Lost count of my A/AF days in May. If I had to roughly guess, it was around 8 days of drinks and around 20-25. This has not happened in a long time.
Myfitnesspal demoted my 846 days accountability back to single digits for not logging in a few days. THAT HURT and sucks.
Looking forward to June with better accountabilty and a clearer head.
Have a fantastic weekend. Make good choices.
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Wanted a bit of wine while preparing Friday's dinner. Why not? Just a glass while prepping. Just another glass to "go with". Just a bit more while cleaning up.
Just grabbed an AF beer first and only.
AF Day 3.
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I am impressed... I gave myself 30 minutes... but then caved. I will be AF today!8
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108 degrees today and Sunday over here...ugh...I'll be in the pool (no drinking this weekend)....see you all in "June"!7
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It looks like May will be basically alcohol free. I didn't drink any directly.
I like the flavour of wine, so I use it in cooking occasionally. So it wasn't 100% alcohol free, but I use a long cooking time, so the alcohol content will be quite low. (For example, with roast chicken I put some wine at the bottom of the roasting pan to make the gravy, and it is cooked at a high temperature for at least 90 minutes.)9 -
It's not even dark yet, and they're already burning police cars here. Not a good night to be anything but sober.
This will be Day 4 AF.11 -
forestdweller1 wrote: »It's not even dark yet, and they're already burning police cars here. Not a good night to be anything but sober.
This will be Day 4 AF.
The world was already in a mess and now this has been added to it. 2020 is not getting my vote for a good year. Stay well @forestdweller1.8 -
forestdweller1 wrote: »It's not even dark yet, and they're already burning police cars here. Not a good night to be anything but sober.
This will be Day 4 AF.
That is awful. What city are you in?2 -
@forestdweller1 Where are you? Wishing for peace and safety for your community.4
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SouthSide Pittsburgh. Thought I would have a snack & a glass of vino [banished that bad bad thought] then sleep while the dumpster fires flamed downtown. Just a minute ago a car ran through SS , guns pointed at pedestrians, dropped off a group who are now smashing store windows, while the car sped back over a bridge, back downtown. Police broke off the chase due to too many protesters. I'm a quarter mile uphill, figuring its way too steep for anyone to bother. Anywho, there's a lot of legal firepower on this hilltop...deerhunters with scanners.
Feels like I'm back in DC, 1968.
Still AF #4...8 -
forestdweller1 wrote: »SouthSide Pittsburgh. Thought I would have a snack & a glass of vino [banished that bad bad thought] then sleep while the dumpster fires flamed downtown. Just a minute ago a car ran through SS , guns pointed at pedestrians, dropped off a group who are now smashing store windows, while the car sped back over a bridge, back downtown. Police broke off the chase due to too many protesters. I'm a quarter mile uphill, figuring its way too steep for anyone to bother. Anywho, there's a lot of legal firepower on this hilltop...deerhunters with scanners.
Feels like I'm back in DC, 1968.
Still AF #4...
OMG!!!!3 -
As usual, I am going to try for 16-20 AF days for the month.
My goal used to be 8AF days per month, I am pretty happy to try to cruise between 16-20 so as not to put too much pressure on myself. If I get more that is just gravy.
I managed 22AF days somehow in April!!
Thanks @MissMay for keeping us going : - )
Friday May 29 - AF - I did the 6 minute wait quite a few times. Worked my butt off in the yard again in the hot sun today. At one point I opened the fridge and there was a Labatt .5 (na beer). I had that on my front porch in the shade, and it did the trick! I will have to get some more of those. I am never a beer drinker, but it tasted good and really quenched my thirst for a treat drink after such physical hot labour. (I would have had a rum punch). I said that I was planning not to have any more drinks days the rest of the month. 2 more to go.
Saturday May 30 - 2 1/2 drinks - really had planned on AF until the end of the month, delayed and delayed...then ... didn't. Couldn't finish my 3rd drink. Normally if I am not going to have an AF day I will have 3 drinks, just for the little "buzz", but I was starting to feel drunk, not buzzed, and drunk means that I puke, so I put it in the freezer. Still happy to have exceeded my 16-20 AF days per month.
21AF days out of 30 days so far8
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