Why do girls like jerks? Why do they put up with them?

BillyMays0

Tell me why?

BonnieandClyde29

Daddy issues and insecurity...

and yes I'm the wife in the picture lol I know my stuff

BillyMays0

Some days They pick the bad boy

BillyMays0

That's true

BonnieandClyde29

Bad boys are exciting obviously in general it's more exciting to do something your not supposed to do but the feeling is short lived, aaaand still comes down to personal issues (daddy, mommy, siblings, or whatever) and insecurity

choijanro

thats what i wanted to know,, why mostly girls want jerk guys than nice guys like me,, , sad but true,, but also depends or vice versa,,


im waiting for the people to comment positive or negative,,so that i will take my time to read and comment if i have idea ,opinion,etc,, and to know a lot of information regards about this ,, anyway u sir are making threads that are very famous,debateful and with sense,, i like that haha

43932452

Idk .. maybe the rebel types .. sorry, no real answer.

Lovelovesme

Well... from personal experience I've tended to fall for the smooth talkers, then as things unravel and real personalities shine through it can be hard to let go of that initial impression of the nice guy, regardless of current behaviour. I was always just waiting for that person to show again while putting up with things I never would've believed I would. Took me awhile to realise that initial person was the lie and wasnt coming back. Its hard to come to terms with as you feel like a real idiot that you could fall for that person in the 1st place, and tend to convince yourself if you wait long enough or change yourself that person will show again when they never actually existed at all :flowerforyou:

Pookylou

I don't like jerks and I won't put up with them - I did in my late teens/early twenties, but I have more self respect than that now.

herblackwings39

I think, if you're lucky, it's something you grow out of as you get older. While dating a "bad boy" might be exciting at 20 it gets old fast.

neandermagnon

I don't like jerks and I don't put up with them. I married a non-jerk, though I'd like to point out that there's a lot more to him than simply being a non-jerk. Being a non-jerk goes along with being human, being alive and good personal hygiene, i.e. basic, non-negotiable requirements, but for a relationship to work, there has to be a lot more than that.

When I was young and had no self esteem whatsoever, I put up with a jerk for a while, because I didn't have enough life experience to know that not all men or relationships are like that, and I didn't have enough self esteem to know that I deserved better. I did dump him eventually though, because his level of jerkiness got to the point where I refused to put up with it any more, in spite of zero self esteem and lack of life experience.

I think the take home message of this should be that if/when you are the parents of daughters (or sons for that matter) bring them up to have high enough self esteem and a good idea of what they should and shouldn't put up with in a relationship, that they don't end up putting up with a jerk because they think all men (or women) and relationships are like that.

talamer

I don't like jerks and I don't put up with them. I married a non-jerk, though I'd like to point out that there's a lot more to him than simply being a non-jerk. Being a non-jerk goes along with being human, being alive and good personal hygiene, i.e. basic, non-negotiable requirements, but for a relationship to work, there has to be a lot more than that.

When I was young and had no self esteem whatsoever, I put up with a jerk for a while, because I didn't have enough life experience to know that not all men or relationships are like that, and I didn't have enough self esteem to know that I deserved better. I did dump him eventually though, because his level of jerkiness got to the point where I refused to put up with it any more, in spite of zero self esteem and lack of life experience.

I think the take home message of this should be that if/when you are the parents of daughters (or sons for that matter) bring them up to have high enough self esteem and a good idea of what they should and shouldn't put up with in a relationship, that they don't end up putting up with a jerk because they think all men (or women) and relationships are like that.

Totally agree with you

and I guess that some women who always looking for jerks doesn't wanna get in real relationship! they always looking for fun !!

amy1612

I think Jenna Marbles said it best......

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3VXXXX9iVPI

karenertl

I don't like jerks and I won't put up with them - I did in my late teens/early twenties, but I have more self respect than that now.

Same here. I'd much rather be alone than with a jerk. One of my neighbors has acted like a jerk to me before (I'm thinking it was his way of trying to get me into bed) and then was completely confused as to why I was never interested in him.

richardbaldwin87

when i was 17-23 i played about and was a jerk to be honest. I slept about and treated girls with no respect at all but they liked me kept coming back. there friends would want me. it was a feeding frenzy on nights out. I never settled down because of this reason why are these girls coming to me when i treat them so badly so it made me think if i treat them properly they would get bored of me.

When i say treat badly i used to cheat, not care about them, ignore calls etc, be offish and openly try it on with other women.

I got lucky though and i found one decent girl who was not easy and i worked hard to get her and now i been with her 4 years engaged and have a child in our own home. who would have thought....

Cindyinpg

If by jerk, we are talking about the strong, confident, arrogant bad boy kind of thing..... Then I believe it's an instinctual thing. In nature, the females are attracted to the Alpha wolves of the pack because of her survival instincts and the fact she wants her pups to have the strongest possible bloodlines. But, if we are talking about just plain jerks, well, then I'm as puzzled as you are.

grrrlface

If by jerk, we are talking about the strong, confident, arrogant bad boy kind of thing..... Then I believe it's an instinctual thing. In nature, the females are attracted to the Alpha wolves of the pack because of her survival instincts and the fact she wants her pups to have the strongest possible bloodlines. But, if we are talking about just plain jerks, well, then I'm as puzzled as you are.

I was just about to say this myself. They're all the traits we need for survival; strength, confidence (could be seen as arrogance). It's just science. Haha

SamanthaClarexo

If by jerk, we are talking about the strong, confident, arrogant bad boy kind of thing..... Then I believe it's an instinctual thing. In nature, the females are attracted to the Alpha wolves of the pack because of her survival instincts and the fact she wants her pups to have the strongest possible bloodlines. But, if we are talking about just plain jerks, well, then I'm as puzzled as you are.

I was just about to say this myself. They're all the traits we need for survival; strength, confidence (could be seen as arrogance). It's just science. Haha

I believe this too! I have no idea why I am attracted to idiots, I just am!

sjanejack

Honestly, I don't know. But I am a girl and I would rather not date a jerk. I haven't dated much, so I can't say that much about it, but when I was hit on it wasn't so much that the guy was seeming to be a jerk, as he just seemed to want to date me or maybe just get in my pants.

jenilla1

I don't like jerks and I do not put up with jerks - never have. A-holes are the biggest turn-offs to me. I like a confident guy who stands up for himself and knows how to treat himself and others with respect. I always feel sorry for girls who pick jerk guys, the same way I feel sorry for guys who pick jerk girls. It's really sad, actually.

Macgeek74

I think this is true with many good women, not all but many. it is common that women dont initially go for the nice guys but they sometimes will fall for one. I get it, jerks tend to be more fun, more alpha like, outgoing, show more confidence, and makes women feel safe and invincible. I am all those but jerks are just louder and in their faces. Jerks love good women as well because they have have them as their safety net and take advantage of their caring and loyal nature.

My life has been hell because of the many I have met. Before anyone says anything, yes, they are really amazing women but just love the bad boys. Yall have heard this before "he needs me or somebody cause he has had a rough life or has no one". Yeah, because he is a jerk to everyone. I love this one too, "I didnt know he was a jerk". Sure you didnt, your friends all told you and you couldn't tell he was when he was peeing on the sleeping homeless guy?

Not try to generalize at all and I know many will attack me and the OP but I am sorry, it is common. Some will say pick a new kind of women, well, I dont like to generalize women but I am having a hard time finding a good one who doesn't like them and they are single. Also, many say they dont like jerks but then later you find out they do.

I will admit this, I have been on both sides of this. I was the bad boy for years and then turned good because I grew up and let me tell you, life was easier and way more dating options being the bad boy. The key is confidence and getting there first.