Regaining weight, struggling to motivate for round 2.
CorvusCorax77
Posts: 2,536 Member
(ETA: i didn't realize i was posting in "Success Stories"... and now I can't figure out how to delete it. Sorry!)
I started MFP in 2010 at approx 182 lbs (I'm 5'4). In four months I got down to 155. A few more months, I was 145. A year later I was down to 123. I decided at that point to start lifting weight, and slowly gained back up to 135-145, which I consider to be my healthiest size. In November 2016, I let myself creep into the 150's, which then crept into the 160's. I was hospitalized in 2018 and got back into the 180's.... anyways.... Today, I'm floating around 165-170.
Here's what I am interested in talking with folks about.... I managed to lose 50 lbs and maintain a healthy weight (under 145) for at least six years, but obviously my food addiction issue has come back. I have for the last two years been saying "enough is enough!" and tracking calories and working out, and then obviously not doing it enough to really make a change. I just don't see why else I would still weigh this much- I know I have no medical excuse. I'm simply finding it harder to do this a second time around. I don't know if it's age, or if I am just less bothered by the weight or what. I am less bothered because I know I'm smaller at 170 now than I was before because I still exercise and lift. But I also know I can't fit into my old clothes- I feel a lot of fatigue, i feel less attractive than I did at 123, and I know it isn't as good for my health as it would be to be at a healthy weight.
Has anyone else experienced this? Any tips on how to overcome? FTR I'm 42 years old now. Maybe it's just age? HELP!
I started MFP in 2010 at approx 182 lbs (I'm 5'4). In four months I got down to 155. A few more months, I was 145. A year later I was down to 123. I decided at that point to start lifting weight, and slowly gained back up to 135-145, which I consider to be my healthiest size. In November 2016, I let myself creep into the 150's, which then crept into the 160's. I was hospitalized in 2018 and got back into the 180's.... anyways.... Today, I'm floating around 165-170.
Here's what I am interested in talking with folks about.... I managed to lose 50 lbs and maintain a healthy weight (under 145) for at least six years, but obviously my food addiction issue has come back. I have for the last two years been saying "enough is enough!" and tracking calories and working out, and then obviously not doing it enough to really make a change. I just don't see why else I would still weigh this much- I know I have no medical excuse. I'm simply finding it harder to do this a second time around. I don't know if it's age, or if I am just less bothered by the weight or what. I am less bothered because I know I'm smaller at 170 now than I was before because I still exercise and lift. But I also know I can't fit into my old clothes- I feel a lot of fatigue, i feel less attractive than I did at 123, and I know it isn't as good for my health as it would be to be at a healthy weight.
Has anyone else experienced this? Any tips on how to overcome? FTR I'm 42 years old now. Maybe it's just age? HELP!
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Replies
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Maybe you have some hormonal things happening that make it more challenging now? I know that I've been up and down the scale through my adult life, more than once. In maintenance now, but have been eating way too much for the last week. I know I have to avoid "looking back", or I get discouraged, throw my hands up, and say what the heck....You know the drill, make a good habit, try to build on good habits, and don't get freaked out about scale fluctuations when you are on track. Look at yourself "at a distance" and coach yourself the way you would coach a friend.
BTW-- it is good that you posted in success stories, because you have maintained some of the weight loss and exercise habits.9 -
I really sympathise, and am also back and losing back to the weight I maintained for several years. There is a great thread in the motivation section with inspiration for people starting again. The link is here: https://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/discussion/10798521/inspo-for-people-that-lost-and-gained-again-post-here/p1.4
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I'm not sure if you're only looking for female input but I'm the same age as you and have had a similar history. I got in shape back in 2011 and had a great time doing it & actually ENJOYED it but eventually let it slip away and ended up as large as I started. I decided "enough is enough" back in 2017 and lost lots of weight again and have kept it off but honestly, it was rough.
We all know it's not easy but it was harder than the first time. I feel like age is a huge factor and although I wouldn't have the same potential hormonal deal as you (someone mentioned as a possibility above), testosterone production in men goes way down after 40. Plus, we just get old! I often wake up sore for no reason and it takes me longer to get going in the morning. Can't just spring out of bed any more.
Another thing that made the process more challenging for me the second time around is the fact that I knew how hard it was and my fat self ruined it by having to do it all over. I eventually just forced myself to exercise at least 4 times per week and log everything that went in my mouth. I lost the weight in 6 months and have (thankfully) kept it off but it was a long 6 months.
It's different for everyone but no matter who you are, it's a challenge.9 -
BobPulaski wrote: »I'm not sure if you're only looking for female input but I'm the same age as you and have had a similar history. I got in shape back in 2011 and had a great time doing it & actually ENJOYED it but eventually let it slip away and ended up as large as I started. I decided "enough is enough" back in 2017 and lost lots of weight again and have kept it off but honestly, it was rough.
We all know it's not easy but it was harder than the first time. I feel like age is a huge factor and although I wouldn't have the same potential hormonal deal as you (someone mentioned as a possibility above), testosterone production in men goes way down after 40. Plus, we just get old! I often wake up sore for no reason and it takes me longer to get going in the morning. Can't just spring out of bed any more.
Another thing that made the process more challenging for me the second time around is the fact that I knew how hard it was and my fat self ruined it by having to do it all over. I eventually just forced myself to exercise at least 4 times per week and log everything that went in my mouth. I lost the weight in 6 months and have (thankfully) kept it off but it was a long 6 months.
It's different for everyone but no matter who you are, it's a challenge.
Thanks! I wasn't just looking for female input. I'm in denial that there may be some sort of perimenopause thing happening. I also have PCOS which is a pain.
It helps to know that it's just a little harder as you age. I have chronic fatigue and I'm not sure if the fatigue is from stress, if it's from age, or if it's from the extra weight. I'm going to send you a friend request!3 -
I really sympathise, and am also back and losing back to the weight I maintained for several years. There is a great thread in the motivation section with inspiration for people starting again. The link is here: https://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/discussion/10798521/inspo-for-people-that-lost-and-gained-again-post-here/p1.
Thank you so much! I'm going to join this thread.0 -
Maybe you have some hormonal things happening that make it more challenging now? I know that I've been up and down the scale through my adult life, more than once. In maintenance now, but have been eating way too much for the last week. I know I have to avoid "looking back", or I get discouraged, throw my hands up, and say what the heck....You know the drill, make a good habit, try to build on good habits, and don't get freaked out about scale fluctuations when you are on track. Look at yourself "at a distance" and coach yourself the way you would coach a friend.
BTW-- it is good that you posted in success stories, because you have maintained some of the weight loss and exercise habits.
You're so sweet. Thank you. I wish I could blame all my regained weight on my hospitalization, but I can't lol. Still, I did get back into the 160's after being in the 180's when I was sick.
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I have no tips other than to say I'm in a similar boat right now. I started out at 179 (I'm 5'3) and got down to about 135 last December and have been creeping up lately and am sitting about 146-148 right now. Its really tough, the world is hard right now and it's easy to just eat and not hold yourself accountable. Happy to be a friend and an accountabili-buddy if you need one I'm trying to do what i did when i first started which is to focus on eating well and tracking everything, for me, when i stop tracking is when i gain. If I am consistently tracking I am being consistent about what i am putting in my body and therefore it's not a costco sized bag of chips! So, thats what I'm focusing on right now, just going for a full month of non-stop tracking. 3
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I feel you! I started my weight loss journey in 2010 at 298 pounds and over the course of that year I lost over 100 pounds. I was super motivated, totally disciplined and loved it although I never quite got to my goal weight. Then, at the beginning of 2011 the wheels started coming off. I found out my position was being eliminated at work, I lost some friends and support. A lot of things about my life changed and I coped by returning to food and started regaining. I have gone back and forth, losing and gaining getting down to the same weight (right around 175-78) before struggling again over the last ten years. I have come to the conclusion that there is some kind of mental/emotional block preventing me finally achieving goal weight and maintaining it. I have no answers for you – I only share in your frustrations.5
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Round 1 is exciting because every pound & inch lost and every new piece of clothing further motivates you.
Round 2+ is more like, "I suck because I did this to myself again and I know how hard this is going to be."
Anyone can do it but it ain't easy.12 -
Nothing for it but to turn this into a continuing success! Aside from doing the things that you know work, I'd also suggest talking to your doc. Specifically they should check your thyroid hormone levels. Low levels of those can make you very tired, and make weight harder to take off. It can do interesting things to your metabolism. If you can, also have them check if you are low on any important nutrients. Deficiencies can have a similar effect.
No matter what though, it's not hopeless. You can totally do this.5 -
I feel you! I started my weight loss journey in 2010 at 298 pounds and over the course of that year I lost over 100 pounds. I was super motivated, totally disciplined and loved it although I never quite got to my goal weight. Then, at the beginning of 2011 the wheels started coming off. I found out my position was being eliminated at work, I lost some friends and support. A lot of things about my life changed and I coped by returning to food and started regaining. I have gone back and forth, losing and gaining getting down to the same weight (right around 175-78) before struggling again over the last ten years. I have come to the conclusion that there is some kind of mental/emotional block preventing me finally achieving goal weight and maintaining it. I have no answers for you – I only share in your frustrations.
I have been thinking a lot about "emotional eating." I have to admit, I feel very comforted by watching fantasy shows (or action flicks) and eating carbs. It's my escape from all the stuff in my head (read: anxiety). It doesn't really make sense if you pick it apart though- that eating doesn't end what ails me. It releases endorphins which are comforting, but it doesn't change my situation. I just realize that my food addiction isn't all that different than any other chemical addiction people use to self medicate- like alcohol for example. I'm lucky i'm not an alcoholic because it runs in my family, but I always felt like alcohol would make me feel ok for a bit, but ultimately my problems would still be there and then I'd have a hangover too. I just need to recognize that my food addiction is similarly not solving problems, but creating problems (my body having too much excess fat).
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Yep. I started back in 2011 (earlier if I count Weigh Watchers) at 190lbs. Made it down to 143-145 4 years ago, moved to a new country, settled my teenage boys in their new environment, lost my dad, CoVid happened and my weight started creeping up. At first 149 “oh it’s still normal fluctuations, I’m sure it’ll be down next week” (tried that free NOOM trial and NOPE). And then 152lbs “OK, it’s still within my original 155lbs -goal from 10 years ago!!!” (Started loosely tracking back here, but not consistently)... 159lbs!!!!! “HOLLY KITTENS girl you better get your act together”... been at it for almost three weeks again, and I’ve gone down to 152.2!!!!
I think for those of us with an attachment to food as a calming mechanism -AKA food addiction- it’ll be with us forever. And quite honestly, it is so easy to fall back into bad habits or poor lifestyle choices. Accepting that has given me some peace and has made Me come to terms with the fact that it’s ok to have life moments that mess with our stability (illness, moving, death, you name it), we just need to find that balance again, no matter how many attempts it takes. When I first reached my 145lbs goal, I decided to accept that I would probably someday have to face gaining some of the weight back again. And that is OK. Life happens!!!6 -
Yep. I started back in 2011 (earlier if I count Weigh Watchers) at 190lbs. Made it down to 143-145 4 years ago, moved to a new country, settled my teenage boys in their new environment, lost my dad, CoVid happened and my weight started creeping up. At first 149 “oh it’s still normal fluctuations, I’m sure it’ll be down next week” (tried that free NOOM trial and NOPE). And then 152lbs “OK, it’s still within my original 155lbs -goal from 10 years ago!!!” (Started loosely tracking back here, but not consistently)... 159lbs!!!!! “HOLLY KITTENS girl you better get your act together”... been at it for almost three weeks again, and I’ve gone down to 152.2!!!!
I think for those of us with an attachment to food as a calming mechanism -AKA food addiction- it’ll be with us forever. And quite honestly, it is so easy to fall back into bad habits or poor lifestyle choices. Accepting that has given me some peace and has made Me come to terms with the fact that it’s ok to have life moments that mess with our stability (illness, moving, death, you name it), we just need to find that balance again, no matter how many attempts it takes. When I first reached my 145lbs goal, I decided to accept that I would probably someday have to face gaining some of the weight back again. And that is OK. Life happens!!!
I remember when I maintained between 2010 and 2016 I felt like I was constantly "dieting." Not "dieting" really, but constantly counting calories. I think that is what maintenance is for those of us with "food addiction" issues- constant vigilance. I used to be embarassed by the fact i logged everything i ate. Now i just accept it. I need a tool to help me be self aware about how much i'm consuming.6 -
I'm going to chime in on this because, once again, I'm at my lowest weight. I started MFP ten years ago and, in two years, lost 100 pounds. It wasn't the first time - I'd lost 50 to 80 pounds at least three earlier times in my life and then gained it all back plus some. Eight years ago, at my lowest weight, I swore I was not going to regain again. But my mother fell and broke her back, I had to spend three weeks alone in her house visiting her in rehab twice a day and...well, it's the same story as everyone else has told. It took 10 months to regain 30 pounds and another three years to regain the remaining seventy. Miserable, depressed and starting to have real health problems, I came back to MFP two and a half years ago. Now I've lost all the regained pounds and am once again swearing I will not regain it. How many times in one lifetime can a person do this?
Truth is, I don't know what the answer is. I gave up sugar and wheat products this time and, so far, have not had that craaaavvvving you get when you just have to eat. I've worked hard on my emotional health in the past two years. I've worked hard to not only have self-control but to believe I have self-control. I've worked really hard to have a positive body image. But I can't tell anyone that this is what works because I have no idea if it will or not. I know someday life will throw me a curveball and I have no idea if I will send it flying back or if it will knock me out.
I have read the research that says my body will fight to regain the weight - I will get hungry more often and I'll eat more before I feel full. The mental tape that makes me feel sorry for myself, that tells me food will lift me up, has not stopped running. I work hard to not listen to any of those weight-gaining demands. I'm hoping that, in time, not listening will get easier. Until then, I weigh daily, I log throughout the day, I work out to lift my spirits and I run little self-admiring tapes all the time and I try to ignore the "you're so self-centered" tape.
The only advice I'm willing to give is this: work on the eating part not the losing part. Work on what and how and where and when and, most especially, why you eat. Work on it the way a recovering alcoholic works on drinking. I've had to tell myself a thousand times: yep, you're going to be controlling your eating for the rest of your life. So what? It's not love or celebration or comfort or enjoyment. It's just eating. Find love, celebrate, be comforted, enjoy life in some other way.
Best of luck to you. Losing weight is the easy part - not gaining it back is the hard.
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CorvusCorax77 wrote: »(ETA: i didn't realize i was posting in "Success Stories"... and now I can't figure out how to delete it. Sorry!)
I don't know if it's age, or if I am just less bothered by the weight or what. I am less bothered because I know I'm smaller at 170 now than I was before because I still exercise and lift. But I also know I can't fit into my old clothes- I feel a lot of fatigue, i feel less attractive than I did at 123, and I know it isn't as good for my health as it would be to be at a healthy weight.
Has anyone else experienced this? Any tips on how to overcome? FTR I'm 42 years old now. Maybe it's just age? HELP!
For what it's worth, I was on a health kick in 2017 (and in 2013, as my username suggests), working out every day, eating right, losing weight. Thought I was going to do it for good that time. A few months into it, my dad died. I fell off the wagon, and it's taken me until now to muster the motivation to get back on. I also find that it's getting harder and taking longer to motivate myself as the years go on. I guess life just gets in the way.
What's working for me right now: I'm starting slowly. I'm not working out to start. I'm not doing any restrictive diets -- heck, I had a bowl of Doritos tonight because I had the calories left. All I'm doing is CICO: staying under my caloric limit for the day, but otherwise not depriving myself of things I really want. CICO isn't a magic bullet, but helps with portion control. The result? So far, 12 pounds down in a few weeks, which is motivating. I'll improve my nutrition and add exercise as time goes on and as my motivation increases, but for now I'm losing weight without feeling like I'm dieting at all.
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Been there! I'm in my 50s. I dropped 100 lbs in 2014. I maintained for a year. Over the next 4 years it all crept back. You mentioned comfort food; that was a big part for me. I did a reset about a month ago, and started a "diet" where I eat the number of calories needed to maintain my target weight, working out foods that are nutritious, filling, and stay within my allotted calorie count. My intent is to focus on a food mix that I can sustain permanently. I allow myself one comfort food meal and one dessert per week. It doesn't feel so painful this way as total avoidance did. I dropped a quick 20, but going forward I'm happy to drop 1 lb per week as I head back toward my goal. Best of luck!0
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I feel your pain - I have done very significant weight losses (over 100lbs) 3X in my life- each time committing that I would not let the weight back on. Most recently was 2018 - and I have kept most of that weight off since then - although that is only a year and half - I am taking some solace that I have realized where I am and taking action now and committing to getting back to my goal weight in the next few months.
I have no magic ideas - just going back to what I know works for me - which is pretty basic - eating right and staying active with some sort of daily workout either a run, a bike ride, or even a good walk.
As you can see - this is a big club - take pride in that actions you are taking - that is a victory right there. You have done this before -you know you can - take pride in the little victories - every day you stick to your plan, every workout you do - rather than staying in bed, every dessert you pass over - you will get there - as will I.3 -
The one thought I do like to hold on to is that all of the work I have done has kept me as healthy as I am. Had I not lost 50 lbs ten years ago, I'd probably be 50 lbs heavier now.
I also think perimenopause is real and affecting things. Last week I was 165. THis week I am 172. I feel awful- nauseous, bloated, my breasts hurt like they have been filled to max capacity. It's water weight. I know that. It's also miserable and it wasn't like this in my 30's. PMS has gotten harder too with age. So there's fatigue, PMS, aches in joints... but there's also looking in the mirror and seeing a chubby me as beautiful so... 40's are quite a trip.3 -
You can do it! You did it the first time. You can do it again. I know that you can! I believe in you
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Hi, I lost 8# in 6wks and was off to a good start. I had my labs checked after my 8# loss and all my numbers improved signifigantly. Over the last 2 weeks I gained the weight back. I let my guard down and stopped tracking on MFP and didnt exercise 5x/week as I had done over the 6 weeks of weight loss. I am so down. I am starting back at square 1 and tracking and exercising 5/week or more. The best thing is I know I can do it again. I just wish I wouldn"t have slid back into my old eating habits!
Also I had stopped alcohol for those 6 wks and that really helped my weight loss... Thanks for listening!2 -
hildegard7 wrote: »Hi, I lost 8# in 6wks and was off to a good start. ... Over the last 2 weeks I gained the weight back. I let my guard down ...
I really feel for you! This was me at Easter: down to 81kg, then I ate Easter eggs and went right back up up to 88kg. i am below 81kg now but I really wish I hadn't let it all come back. However, I did. The good news is it does come off again. Such hard work, all this weight loss: who knew?1 -
hildegard7 wrote: »Hi, I lost 8# in 6wks and was off to a good start. I had my labs checked after my 8# loss and all my numbers improved signifigantly. Over the last 2 weeks I gained the weight back. I let my guard down and stopped tracking on MFP and didnt exercise 5x/week as I had done over the 6 weeks of weight loss. I am so down. I am starting back at square 1 and tracking and exercising 5/week or more. The best thing is I know I can do it again. I just wish I wouldn"t have slid back into my old eating habits!
Also I had stopped alcohol for those 6 wks and that really helped my weight loss... Thanks for listening!
not drinking alcohol was key to my first successful weight loss- not just because of the calories, but because it is easier to say "f it" and binge when I'm drunk.
I think losing 8 lbs in 6 weeks sounds like a rate that is actual fat loss. Gaining 8 lbs in 2 weeks sounds more like water weight. I'm trying a new thing of weighing myself every day to get used to the fluctuations and using programs that average your weight over 7 days to see patterns. I am hoping I can stop taking it so personally when the scale goes up a few lbs, and just stay true to my course.4 -
I relate to all of this. I feel like I am constantly starting, stopping, recommitting to healthier eating, then giving up and watching Netflix in bed. Since COVID started and I'm wfh, I don't walk that much anymore. I've been up and down (mostly up) my whole life. Food is a very emotional thing for me, and also I just like to eat. Thinnest I ever was in my adult life was 145, after a lengthy illness. I was trying to get back to 150 (my healthiest weight) but since becoming a mom at 45, moving across country for work, and going into menopause, I crept up to 175; I've gained 10 lbs since March when our office closed. I start every day with best intentions and end up at night with a spoon in the peanut butter. Such a see-saw. Anyway, thanks for everybody's honesty. Nice to know I'm not alone.6
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CorvusCorax77 wrote: »(ETA: i didn't realize i was posting in "Success Stories"... and now I can't figure out how to delete it. Sorry!)
I started MFP in 2010 at approx 182 lbs (I'm 5'4). In four months I got down to 155. A few more months, I was 145. A year later I was down to 123. I decided at that point to start lifting weight, and slowly gained back up to 135-145, which I consider to be my healthiest size. In November 2016, I let myself creep into the 150's, which then crept into the 160's. I was hospitalized in 2018 and got back into the 180's.... anyways.... Today, I'm floating around 165-170.
Here's what I am interested in talking with folks about.... I managed to lose 50 lbs and maintain a healthy weight (under 145) for at least six years, but obviously my food addiction issue has come back. I have for the last two years been saying "enough is enough!" and tracking calories and working out, and then obviously not doing it enough to really make a change. I just don't see why else I would still weigh this much- I know I have no medical excuse. I'm simply finding it harder to do this a second time around. I don't know if it's age, or if I am just less bothered by the weight or what. I am less bothered because I know I'm smaller at 170 now than I was before because I still exercise and lift. But I also know I can't fit into my old clothes- I feel a lot of fatigue, i feel less attractive than I did at 123, and I know it isn't as good for my health as it would be to be at a healthy weight.
Has anyone else experienced this? Any tips on how to overcome? FTR I'm 42 years old now. Maybe it's just age? HELP!
What kind of foods are you eating? When i start having problems with appetite i will lower carbs and sugar so as not to have that spike that falls fast and triggers hunger. If needed ill eat like that for some days more along the keto way of eating and it has benefits as a eating strategy to help you regain footing then switch back afterwards. Just one thought on the subject. Ive been losing for a little over a year right now and have a bit of trouble from time to time.3 -
I’m in the same position, I’m in my early 50’s and 18 years ago lost 6st but it (and more) crept back on after 2 redundancies, a divorce and a sedentary job. 3 years ago I decided to do something about it, started on here and lost 5st but then COVID hit and working from home made me more sedentary than ever before. I also started drinking loads more and then binging and I’ve put 2st back on. I’m so ashamed and cross with myself, I thought I’d beaten the food addiction but obviously not.
I restarted (again) this week and so far have done an exercise class, a session on my new cross trainer and logged most of my food. I’ve bought into the plan and feel mentally ready to tackle this for the 3rd time, hopefully this will be the last.4 -
I have come to the conclusion that I need to think of this journey as an on-going commitment to eating healthily, exercising regularly, and thereby staying at a healthy weight.4
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Love this thread...My personal mantra is "Back Again".
Basically, I've been on a diet since I was 11. Thin mother, chunky child. I'm able to stabilize for a while, then I say, oh, I've got this under control- I can eat what I want. Ha. Right now it's the "Covid-15" (yes, I was one of those yeast hoarders). It was fun while it lasted...now my pants don't fit. I can do it, but the key is not to get to within 5 lbs of my goal and say, YAY- hand me the bag of chips...4 -
Just not giving up on me. I was out with my 81 year old mom and mentally challenged 67 year old brother in law who had covid and then i got covid. WE did not get it to bad. my brother in law was the worst but we are good but i gained 7 pound. But i am back at work and starting over on those pounds .. gonna get them off and then some.. we just can't give up!!!5
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I can't remember the last time I logged in. It was ages ago... since then, I have fluctuated up, then up, then down, then up again - until I hit 9st.10lbs.... way, way heavier than I have ever been!
I decided to Fast, and since the end of May, I have lost 1st 10lbs... yup. Back down to 8 stone again. I'm happy. It works. It's a lifetime commitment, but I am gloriously happy about that; it's a lifestyle change, and a new attitude to food. That, coupled with LCHP/F, is a winning formula for me! Once I reach target weight, 7 or so lbs to go!) I shall be Fasting for 'maintenance' only... so I will be able to vary my intake now and then, and not have to overly worry. As with any eating regimen involving discipline, it should be an invigorating challenge, not a fearsome ordeal... it fits with me; I don't modify my life to fit with IT.3
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