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Great bodies and attractiveness or Money and success catch our eye?

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  • penguinmama87penguinmama87 Member, Premium Posts: 267 Member Member, Premium Posts: 267 Member
    To strip it down to its bare essentials, I think both physical attractiveness and financial security matter from a kind of evolutionary standpoint - if you're attractive, healthy, and strong, you're more likely to have babies, and if you have good access to resources, you'll likely be able to make sure they survive into adulthood. That's a really bare bones way of looking at it, and might not seem to fit our contemporary existence with its seemingly infinite possibilities, but there is a kind of logic to it on that level.

    I've definitely had the experience of thinking a person is incredibly attractive - and then they begin talking. :D

    The other aspect is potential and longevity. I think a lot of people look for "right now" and not necessarily the future. I was always future minded when dating - "OK, so this guy works hard and is family minded. He might not be rich right now, and might not ever be, but he's not ever going to be a slouch." THAT was hugely important to me. Also confronting the reality that if the relationship is long-term, or permanent, that eventually one of you will die, and if you're lucky you will probably "lose" your physical attractiveness (at least how we typically think of it) well before that.

    I also think a lot of people think about what kind of partner they want, but not about what kind of partner they want to be!

    I remember reading several years ago that spousal abandonment is a real risk when one becomes suddenly ill, which makes me incredibly sad.
    edited March 7
  • RunsWithBeesRunsWithBees Member Posts: 1,413 Member Member Posts: 1,413 Member
    I really don’t care about money or body (as long as they can take care of themselves at least and I don’t care about muscles or being overweight) What attracts me is: a compatible sense of humor, face, hands (especially how his hands move), voice (voice is even more important than face), smell (his natural scent, not artificial perfumes or colognes) creativity and imagination are also important and we just have to get along really well in general (I’m not the easiest person to get along with, I’m extremely introverted) Luckily for me I found my guy <3 Been together for 11+ years, what attracted me to him initially was his writing style and he just happened to have everything else I like and more! :)
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