How Do You Unwind without Food/Netflix?

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  • cwolfman13
    cwolfman13 Posts: 41,865 Member
    edited April 2021
    Theoldguy1 wrote: »
    cwolfman13 wrote: »
    Wife and I typically watch one of our shows every evening. With an 11 and 9 year old, we don't really have any time to "unwind" until the kids start making their way to bed which is around 8:00 or so. We usually sit down for our show around 8:30 or 9:00. That is also when I have my scheduled evening desert and my tea. I usually hit the rack around 10:00 and read for 30-60 minutes depending on how zonked I am. The reading before I go to sleep is way more unwindy than our show though. I honestly can't imagine having four hours of "free time" in the evenings...I could think of a million things I'd rather do than watch TV though...but I'd probably prefer that to helping with homework and such.

    Not to sound like the old person that has been there but to be honest, with grown kids now, I'd happily give up nighttime TV to have a few years back of helping with homework, volunteering at school activities, coaching, attending games etc. Never watched TV weekday evenings while they were growing up unless possibly an occasional special sporting event with the kids.

    Savor it, it will be gone soon.

    Oh, I love the coaching (assisted a few years ago with my oldest's flag football team) and games and practices and my kids are at a great age right now for hanging out with me and doing all kinds of fun "play" stuff...they even have me doing a few little tricks on my free style scooter at the skate park. A couple more years and they'll be too embarrassed to have their bald and gray haired dad doing bunny hops at the skate park in front of their friends. That stuff is actually a big reason I stopped doing a lot of cycling events and training and whatnot back in 2018/19...more time to just play and have fun with my kids and I still get a lot of exercise for it...I can always pick up where I left off with cycling when they don't want to play anymore. I'd play all day with them if I could...spent about 4 or 5 hours with them yesterday in the pool chasing them around and diving down for "treasure" before we all retired to the patio in exhaustion for some ham and scalloped potatoes.

    But I do hate homework...and the constant fighting to get it done...and procrastination...and the "I did it already" hoping I won't check...especially the common core math which ultimately makes sense to me conceptually, but it's so foreign to how I learned it that it takes me a long time to work something out when they need help.

    If we didn't have to do that, I'd be more than happy to head down to the soccer fields and kick the ball around or throw the football around or shoot hoops in the driveway. Soccer practice starts tonight and they just got bumped up to the premiere league and had to try out and such...so this should be fun.
  • JustaNoob
    JustaNoob Posts: 147 Member
    cwolfman13 wrote: »
    JustaNoob wrote: »
    cwolfman13 wrote: »
    JustaNoob wrote: »
    Thoin wrote: »
    JustaNoob wrote: »
    I find more and more that I need to unwind mentally after work or when I have been around people for a couple hours. My go-to is to turn on Netflix and eat. Once I turn the TV on, I find it really difficult to turn it off and therefore spend 4 hours just sitting in front of the TV. I hate a quiet house at night.

    During that time, I find it hard to stop eating. I'll be full, have had a treat, and have had sufficient calories for the day, but just want to keep eating. I think Netflix is a bit of a trigger and I want to break the habit.

    I go for a 30 minute walk, but just haven't found anything that helps me to unwind. What do you do?

    This may be way off but sometimes it has to do with depression or something. I have found myself trying to fill a void with food many times.

    Also I found I wanted food when watching Netflix. I basically trained my body to want food when I watch it because that's when I would eat. I think it was a reward system that my body grew used to. I needed to relax and eating and watching netflix was a great way to do that. However I also use food as a comfort system.

    Thanks! I don't find that I am depressed, but I do find myself to be more anxious than normal. I feel like I am trying to feed something in my brain to release that "Ahhhh" feeling. I went to the doctor this morning to get bloodwork to make sure all of my hormones are working properly.

    That is likely very habit driven...both the behavior as well as the psychological "release". Unfortunately, breaking habits suck. I experienced the same when I quit drinking...I was at a loss as to what to do our how to "unwind" in the evening without drinking. There is a lot going on there subconsciously and there is some retraining that has to take place and unfortunately, that isn't the most comfortable thing in the world.

    For alcohol I did a lot of cognitive behavior reading and journaling and saw a therapist for a short time as well...though I think I would have gone along just fine with the reading itself and journaling. I've heard of people doing this with food stuff as well.

    How long did it take to break that habit? I definitely think it is my habit and normally I am seeking out some type of sugar for that mental release. For the 100th time, I have removed all sweets from my house because I just can't handle them in moderation right now. I will eat them until there is none left.

    My first week sober was pretty tough. The first thing I used to do when I walked in the door was to pop open a beer and poor a shot. That first week or so, I really didn't know what to do with myself and was pretty uncomfortable. From there things just got easier by the day. After my first 3-4 weeks it was much easier and was no longer the first thought in my head when I arrived home. I'll be going on 90 days here and I rarely think about it now except for implicit social situations where others are drinking...but I don't really think about it on the day to day anymore. Even when others around me are partaking, it has become much easier...I will usually have an initial craving that passes fairly quickly when I turn my attention to something else...but also, after about an hour or so people start acting...well...drunk, and it's very interesting watching while sober and generally leaves me with an even lesser desire to drink as I know exactly how foolish I can be when I'm inebriated.

    Fortunately, I have a lot of other things that take my time and focus so it was probably easier for me to pivot to just concentrating more on those things and less on drinking. I do have to keep myself busy though...if I go just hang out on the patio for hours those cravings will kick in...I have to keep occupied.

    Awesome accomplishment! And a good lesson just allowing yourself to be uncomfortable... I think If I could get some solid time under my belt, then it wouldn't be quite so uncomfortable. I have had times were this wasn't a problem-- I didn't even own a TV until the past 3 years and 3 years ago I was successfully losing/maintaining weight loss! So I know it can be done.
  • JustaNoob
    JustaNoob Posts: 147 Member
    AnnPT77 wrote: »
    As snack/food replacement habits, I often suggest people seek out things that either require clean hands (like the needlework or coloring) or create dirty hands (like painting or carpentry).

    Love this! It sounds like a lot of people keep their hands busy. I can crochet and play the guitar (ish)...
  • callsitlikeiseeit
    callsitlikeiseeit Posts: 8,626 Member
    I dont have the attention span to do ANYTHING for 4 hours (much less 4 hours of free time where i shouldn't be doing something else LOL)

    read
    get adult coloring books and cool markers/pencils
    sew
    crochet
    clean/organize
    take up a new hobby/ learn a new one
    Volunteer somewhere for a couple of those hours
    foster a dog (you'll never have free time again lol)
    garden (container gardening if you dont have land you can use)
    write letters to family and friends (people LOVE real mail!)
    digitize printed photos
    paint your walls new colors
    if you own your home, do home improvement projects

    those are just off the top of my head.
  • cbihatt
    cbihatt Posts: 319 Member
    I highly recommend a hobby, if you don't have one. Something you can do that will keep your mind busy (and maybe your hands), but is not a huge mental effort. Maybe try a few different things that have interested you, but felt you haven't had time for in the past. Read, play cards, do a puzzle, knit, paint, write in a journal, meditate, learn to play an instrument, do a crossword puzzle, learn wood carving, sculpting....whatever. Keep trying new things until you find the thing that is enjoyable and relaxing to you. It might take some trial and error.
  • littlegreenparrot1
    littlegreenparrot1 Posts: 702 Member
    I walk for about an hour with audio books or podcasts.
    Spend time cooking, yoga/tai chi on youtube. Gym/swim if they are open where you are.

    A few months ago though I just decided I would not eat after dinner any more. I eat my dinner, usually have some dessert of some kind, clean everything up and that's it. Only tea for the rest of the evening. Occasionally I am ravenous and don't stick to it, but usually it doesn't bother me at all.
    It takes work to start with but you can create new habits.
  • NorthCascades
    NorthCascades Posts: 10,968 Member
    Bike ride.
  • scarlett_k
    scarlett_k Posts: 812 Member
    edited April 2021
    It sounds like you're bored. Maybe you could try finding something to do that actively requires your attention and keeps your hands occupied. Crochet, cooking, painting, DIY? I usually watch/listen to stuff while I'm doing something else.
  • AmunahSki
    AmunahSki Posts: 209 Member
    I like a Netflix fix... and to avoid snacking I brush & floss my teeth then go watch in bed - with just a nice cold glass of water.

    Do let us know if you tried any of these tips, and what has worked for you.
  • wunderkindking
    wunderkindking Posts: 1,615 Member
    Of relevance here, I think:

    I have learned that sometimes the answer to not mindlessly eating in front of the television is to stop binging the show and GO TO BED.

    I eat BADLY when I'm tired. My battery (metaphorical battery) runs low and the options are 'eat' or 'sleep'. Sleep is 0 calories.

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