Ready for a Change

24

Replies

  • AnnPT77
    AnnPT77 Posts: 34,620 Member
    @Overheadfan, there's a thread in the "Goal: Maintaining Weight" section's "Most Helpful Posts" about various methods for figuring out maintenance calories.

    https://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/discussion/10638211/how-to-find-your-maintenance-calorie-level/p1
  • Overheadfan
    Overheadfan Posts: 72 Member
    Thankyou! I'll check that out
  • Overheadfan
    Overheadfan Posts: 72 Member
    That is a really helpful guide and I need to thank you again AnnPT77.
    I also realized that even though I'm losing weight slowly ( and a good 15 kgs from goal )I have suddenly found a name for the feelings I have.... " regain anxiety".
    It would be funny if it wasn't taking up too much of my time thinking about it.
    Very handy to give something a name, understand it and put it away in my brain where it's not upsetting my positive thoughts.
  • Overheadfan
    Overheadfan Posts: 72 Member
    Just have to vent....so apologies in advance for the rant....
    I had a number of cousins visit , thoroughly enjoying being with them all ..but one particular cousin kept referring to me in the collective as " you fatties". As in " you fatties are so good at baking".
    Say what?!!!

    So that was embarrassing. But I smiled nicely and just ignored it EVERY time she said it and thought to myself..." See you in a few months Cuz".

  • walker306
    walker306 Posts: 92 Member
    Hello Overhead Fan! Im in my lower 60's and weigh about the same as you. I have been on an off My Fitness Pall more time than I care to admit. I am starting out to improve my stats right along with you. I don't know how I'm going to attack it yet but I will have a plan by the end of today. Good luck!
  • AnnPT77
    AnnPT77 Posts: 34,620 Member
    Overheadfan wrote: »
    Just have to vent....so apologies in advance for the rant....
    I had a number of cousins visit , thoroughly enjoying being with them all ..but one particular cousin kept referring to me in the collective as " you fatties". As in " you fatties are so good at baking".
    Say what?!!!

    So that was embarrassing. But I smiled nicely and just ignored it EVERY time she said it and thought to myself..." See you in a few months Cuz".

    That is . . . ugh . . . toxic. I'm so sorry.
  • springlering62
    springlering62 Posts: 8,679 Member
    I saw that and had to walk away from the keyboard.

    Ann was much nicer than me.

    I know they’re cousins but it doesn’t give them a license for ugliness.
  • mtaratoot
    mtaratoot Posts: 14,386 Member
    Overheadfan wrote: »
    Just have to vent....so apologies in advance for the rant....
    I had a number of cousins visit , thoroughly enjoying being with them all ..but one particular cousin kept referring to me in the collective as " you fatties". As in " you fatties are so good at baking".
    Say what?!!!

    So that was embarrassing. But I smiled nicely and just ignored it EVERY time she said it and thought to myself..." See you in a few months Cuz".

    I think I would have politely asked that particular cousin to "Get the F out of my house." If they looked at me funny, I'd add, "You and your bad manners aren't welcome here; now get out. NOW!"

    Don't put up with that *tiny feline*
  • Overheadfan
    Overheadfan Posts: 72 Member
    Thankyou all for you supportive responses. I did feel embarrassed , hurt and annoyed but just sat there pretending to be completely unaffected.
    Apart from the stupidity and meanness of her comment, it's just bad manners.
    I have never , and not would I ever, make a comment like that to anyone , or to anyone ABOUT anyone.
    Weight appears to be the one thing which others feel they have " ownership " over. It's always astounded me, the need in other people to comment . My mum suffered many embarrassing and hurtful comments and I saw the impact that had on her.
    Kindness Matters!
  • Overheadfan
    Overheadfan Posts: 72 Member
    Hi to Walker306
    My apologies for being ignorant about posting...I don't know how to click on your message and respond . I'll wait for my son to visit... he'll sort me out. :)
    All the best on your wellness journey. I'd love to read your progress over the next few months. I report in most days, make sure you say hello!
  • AnnPT77
    AnnPT77 Posts: 34,620 Member
    Overheadfan wrote: »
    Hi to Walker306
    My apologies for being ignorant about posting...I don't know how to click on your message and respond . I'll wait for my son to visit... he'll sort me out. :)
    All the best on your wellness journey. I'd love to read your progress over the next few months. I report in most days, make sure you say hello!

    To reply directly to a message, just click on "quote" below their message. That will copy their message to the "Leave a Comment" box where you type your reply. Be sure to type after the "/quote" that's in square brackets at the end of their copied post. That's it.

    Also, if you want to get someone's attention by using their user ID, but an "@" in front of the ID. If they have notifications set up, they'll get a notification that you've mentioned them so they know to come back to the thread.

    You'll figure all this stuff out! :flowerforyou:
  • Overheadfan
    Overheadfan Posts: 72 Member
    Oh my goodness! That's so helpful. Thankyou. I realized I could bookmark discussions ...prior to that I was searching through the threads. . It's a learning curve in so many ways. :)
  • Overheadfan
    Overheadfan Posts: 72 Member
    Ok, latest weigh in still shows that I'm holding at 95 kgs and I'm happy with that. I've kept in mind all of the advice and info from the MFP community...now I focus on my trend. And that's still heading in the right direction. Not panicking!
    I've graduated to my 2 kg dumbbells to strengthen my wrists after the fractures. , and I'm back to doing my online walking workouts. The knee has improved significantly.

    I'm feeling really good but must confess to a slight low grade anxiety about my upcoming trip . I don't want to let things slip so I'll be putting in a bit of planning and prep along the way.

    One big incentive is that the " evil cousin" will be back in town next month...it might be nice to maintain a dignified silence while she has to process my weightloss.
    Yeah...I am that petty. :)
  • ddsb1111
    ddsb1111 Posts: 885 Member
    So nice to get your update and hear that you’re staying calm and collected. If you get anxious just read this thread and do what you know works. Can’t wait to hear how the visit turns out! Just know at the end of the day, her opinion doesn’t matter in the least 💕
  • AnnPT77
    AnnPT77 Posts: 34,620 Member
    Overheadfan wrote: »
    Ok, latest weigh in still shows that I'm holding at 95 kgs and I'm happy with that. I've kept in mind all of the advice and info from the MFP community...now I focus on my trend. And that's still heading in the right direction. Not panicking!
    I've graduated to my 2 kg dumbbells to strengthen my wrists after the fractures. , and I'm back to doing my online walking workouts. The knee has improved significantly.

    I'm feeling really good but must confess to a slight low grade anxiety about my upcoming trip . I don't want to let things slip so I'll be putting in a bit of planning and prep along the way.

    One big incentive is that the " evil cousin" will be back in town next month...it might be nice to maintain a dignified silence while she has to process my weightloss.
    Yeah...I am that petty. :)

    This is all such good news: Following your trend calmly, wrist recovery progressing, back to walking with improved knee . . . hooray, you!

    Don't worry too much about your trip, enjoy your trip: You can keep things reasonable, but don't forget to include some enjoyment in the mix as well. An unusual day or few that are rare things won't have much impact on the big picture, so no need to be very anxious.

    I hope your "evil cousin" encounter will be deeply satisfying. <sneaky grin>
  • Overheadfan
    Overheadfan Posts: 72 Member
    I've really enjoyed the support and encouragement from the MFP community. It is absolutely my daily " go to" for positive reinforcement and trusting the process. I'm really early into the journey ( 5 weeks now) but I feel very informed and empowered
    Thankyou all for your comments ..truly and sincerely appreciated .
    I've been enjoying reading other threads and hearing about other members experiences with family , friends or random strangers. Some of it is just so toxic it's frankly gobsmacking.
    I don't discuss my weigh gain or weightloss with anyone..never have ...and I figured I'd be fairly immune or invisible ..but nope ...Not so! Nothing toxic ,but just surprising I guess.

    I was in the local supermarket and the woman behind the deli counter questioned my choice . I asked for turkey meat and she said" Oh...on a diet are you?"
    And I said " Nope, just enjoying a really healthy lifestyle".
    And she said " Hmmm...bit too old for THAT aren't we? I reckon at our age nothing much will change".

    Ummmm...ok.

    So I said" I'm sorry you feel that way".
    And smiled , thanked her and walked away.
  • Overheadfan
    Overheadfan Posts: 72 Member
    Well , here I am in Melbourne. I have no access to kitchen scales to weigh food ..or bathroom scales to weigh myself. My calorie intake is still being tracked to the best of my ability and I have no clue how I'm going. We've been incredibly busy for the last few days , loads of walking and climbing stairs, carting loaded bags etc so the exercise has been consistent and definitely increased.
    I'm back in West Oz in a few days so I'll weigh in

    My mantra has been borrowed from the kind MFP community..you have advised me to calmly and methodically trust the process. I'm adhering to the system.. occasionally flying a little blind...and I think all will be well.
    "
  • springlering62
    springlering62 Posts: 8,679 Member
    Overheadfan wrote: »
    Well , here I am in Melbourne. I have no access to kitchen scales to weigh food ..or bathroom scales to weigh myself. My calorie intake is still being tracked to the best of my ability and I have no clue how I'm going. We've been incredibly busy for the last few days , loads of walking and climbing stairs, carting loaded bags etc so the exercise has been consistent and definitely increased.
    I'm back in West Oz in a few days so I'll weigh in

    My mantra has been borrowed from the kind MFP community..you have advised me to calmly and methodically trust the process. I'm adhering to the system.. occasionally flying a little blind...and I think all will be well.
    "

    This post is totally and wonderfully awesome! 👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻
  • mtaratoot
    mtaratoot Posts: 14,386 Member
    @Overheadfan

    This will be a good experience for you no matter what the scale says when you get home. Even if it's up a little, it won't be a disaster. Just, as you say, trust the process. It will be fun to find out how good you are at estimating. This is a skill that you can build and improve over time with the understanding that it will go out of calibration if you're not vigilant.

    When you get back home, you can even try to estimate what something weighs BEFORE you weigh it. You might be surprised that you get better at this over time. Many people are surprised how far off they are when they start, so it's fun to see how you're getting better.

    In addition to calmly trusting the process, don't forget to have a good time and enjoy yourself. It sounds like you've got a good handle on that balance, so yay!
  • springlering62
    springlering62 Posts: 8,679 Member
    I assume you flew. Don’t forget. travel - cabin pressure- can add many pounds of water weight.

    I gained 7 last time I flew and it was gone within a week. I’m OCD but I enjoy weighing immediately before and after I leave. I’m my own little science experiment.
  • Overheadfan
    Overheadfan Posts: 72 Member
    I'm happy to report that my Melbourne trip went very well, I currently weigh 93 kg, so my occasional under or over calorie intake ...coupled with the huge amount of walking, had me staying quite nicely on my weightloss path.
    So given that everything is going well, AND I'm losing weigh AND finding it a smooth and relatively easy process.....can anyone tell me why I'm still not quite " believing " it.
    Does that sound weird? I find myself occasionally saying to myself. " Yeah..it's ok now but eventually it might not work".
    And on a completely logical and sensible level I KNOW that's just not making sense...but I still feel that occasional anxiety.
    Maybe my brain is still playing catch-up .

    p.s. Cousin Evil visiting next week. Watch this space. :)
  • mtaratoot
    mtaratoot Posts: 14,386 Member
    Trust the process.

    Keep going.

    Someday, maybe, you'll believe that reality is REAL.

    I'm surprised that Evil Cousin is still welcome in your home.
  • Overheadfan
    Overheadfan Posts: 72 Member


    :)))) Evil Cousin is welcome because if nothing else I'm using her impending visits as an added incentive to stay on track. That's juvenile and petty but I'd be lying if I said otherwise.



  • springlering62
    springlering62 Posts: 8,679 Member
    Prepare yourself for even more personal comments. Unfortunately, that kind is never the one who can stop and say “wow! You’re really looking good! Congratulations on your hard work!”

    Because you are working hard! And your thread and determination here sure do show it.

    As for not believing, honey, I started here October 2018. I’d already lost 20 when I joined. I still don’t believe it, and honest to gawd I check the mirror every morning to make sure there isn’t some kind of mistake.

    Have people take photos of you, including some caught unawares. That was when it really hit home for me, seeing candid photos.
  • mtaratoot
    mtaratoot Posts: 14,386 Member
    Overheadfan wrote: »
    Cousin Evil did visit , and yep! , She was unpleasant , unkind and negative. And that didn't phase me because I knew I was part of a positive community who are invested in improving their health and well-being. Cousin Evil 's opinion just didn't rate. :)


    5q05x7h8a7pv.png

  • springlering62
    springlering62 Posts: 8,679 Member
    How miserable must Cousin Evil’s life be that she
    A.) lives up to expectations
    B.) has to be like that

    Sad for her. But happy for YOU!!!!!! You’re killing it! All you can do is live by example and hope she cottons on, right?
  • AnnPT77
    AnnPT77 Posts: 34,620 Member
    springlering62 wrote: »
    How miserable must Cousin Evil’s life be that she
    A.) lives up to expectations
    B.) has to be like that

    Sad for her. But happy for YOU!!!!!! You’re killing it! All you can do is live by example and hope she cottons on, right?

    Yes! Living well is the best revenge. Well, maybe accomplishing goals that Cousin Evil espouses but can't accomplish is more vengeful, but we wouldn't want to risk our character by thinking of it that way, probably. ;)

    @Overheadfan, what I loved about your recent PP was the tone that you're sailing along with your self-image and positive plans completely unfazed by Cousin Evil. Appropriate ego strength is a wonderful thing.

    Keep up the trend of raging success you're on: So excellent!
  • Overheadfan
    Overheadfan Posts: 72 Member
    mtaratoot wrote: »
    Trust the process.

    Keep going.

    Someday, maybe, you'll believe that reality is REAL.

    I'm surprised that Evil Cousin is still welcome in your home.

    I keep the " Keep going .. Reality is REAL" as a mantra in my head. :)

    My weightloss has stalled at 93 kilos for the last few weeks and it's frustrating , but I'm sticking to my plan and doggedly determined. I'd be lying if I said it wasn't disappointing . Consistent weightloss ,(however small , is a boost and supplies me with a self congratulatory pat on the back. I miss that boost, but it will happen again.
    I'm down but not out!
  • mtaratoot
    mtaratoot Posts: 14,386 Member
    Trust your gauges. Keep sticking to it. It works!

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