I Feel Fat and I'm Not Sure Why

lisakatz2
lisakatz2 Posts: 566 Member
in Health and Weight Loss
I feel so low. I've lost 13 pounds since March 20, but I feel fat. Technically I'm still obese at 187 (I'm 5 foot four) but I think there may be more to it than that. There was a point weeks ago when I felt uplifted and excited about my fitness journey, but now I just feel like it's a grind. Shouldn't I feel better and better about my weight loss? I just want to emphasize that I do NOT feel like I'm going to cycle back, but I'm tired of feeling like crap. Someone, please give me some advice!
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Replies

  • tomcustombuilder
    tomcustombuilder Posts: 2,247 Member
    Just focus on your progress. The more you lose the more you will feel every lb lost. That’s a pound a week so just stay the course. You could slightly increase your weekly deficit for a bit faster result if you want. As you lose more you’ll have to anyway as your maintenance calories get lower as you get lighter
  • KareninCanada
    KareninCanada Posts: 962 Member
    Great insights+

    I would share that observation with your husband - obviously I don't know your relationship but he may legit not know the best way to encourage you. Some of us can stall once we start getting compliments and he might know someone who has that mindset - one friend of mine wants people to cheer her on to keep going and not to compliment her because then she starts feeling like "maybe I don't actually need to work so hard anymore"
  • lisakatz2
    lisakatz2 Posts: 566 Member
    edited July 6
    Good insights Tom/Karen. Perhaps when he says, "keep on going!" that's simply his way of encouraging me (though I'd prefer "you're looking great!"). I have to ask him "Do you notice any change?" and he'll say "Yeah, I see it in your face, mostly" I don't blame him. It's slower going on my belly and hips. I know that.
    He knows that. I have to accept this, be patient, and recognize that the rest will go down, eventually.

    Another thing that brings me down sometimes is lost time. I'm going to be 62 in October and I finally "get this" after decades of yo-yo dieting. I wish I discovered MFP 40 years ago (don't know how long it's been around, really). But it's been a 40-year learning experience. I don't think I would have arrived at this part of my journey without getting finally sick and tired of the yo-yo, and figuring out what I needed to do differently this time around.
  • kshama2001
    kshama2001 Posts: 28,052 Member
    Here's a great high protein snack recipe. You may wish to decrease the quantities to decrease the calories, currently 374. (Ethan has higher calorie needs than you do.)

    https://www.cookwell.com/recipe/peanut-banana-cocoa-crunch-bowl

    The video has slightly different ingredients, notably cocoa powder instead of nibs:

    https://www.youtube.com/shorts/xWxn5SaxLFU

    I get lots of inspiration from Ethan Chlebowski's channel. He has lots of food science videos, and recipes focusing on protein.

    https://www.youtube.com/@EthanChlebowski/videos

    "I'm Ethan, it's my philosophy that once you learn the how AND why behind cooking, you become a much better cook. Why is salt the most important seasoning for cooking? How is gluten actually developed in bread making? Why does a smash burger generate more flavor compounds through browning than a grilled burger? Once I learn, I want to share that information with you, so we can all become better cooks together."
  • lisakatz2
    lisakatz2 Posts: 566 Member
    Thanks for the links! :) I'm going to try making the lower cal version of the protein bowl.
  • Lietchi
    Lietchi Posts: 6,879 Member
    tomcustombuilder wrote: »
    Don’t rely on spouses for compliments. Some just won’t give you props. It would be nice however it’s your fight so do whatever it takes to keep your head in the game.

    I remember losing the first 10lbs, feeling good about it. I mentioned it to my BF and he went 'you don't actually think people can see the difference, do you?'. Honestly, he's great otherwise, but he's not a diplomat 🤪 nor is he a great observer, because I definitely could see a difference (and there are other anecdotes too indicating he's not always perceptive)
    Fortunately I didn't let his reaction discourage me!
  • AnnPT77
    AnnPT77 Posts: 34,598 Member
    lisakatz2 wrote: »
    Thank you everyone who has commented on my thread. It means a lot to me. I realize that only I know the answer to this question, but it all gives me food for thought. I see it as two things: losing patience, and boredom (which I think are going hand-in-hand). As others mentioned, it's important to log, but there are other things I can tweak.

    One (I'm thinking) is my Macro split, which is as follows:

    Calories 1510
    Carbohydrates - 113 g- 30%
    Fat 67 g- 40%
    Protein -113 g - 30%

    I'm thinking of going higher carb one day a week, while staying within my deficit. I've been eating "healthy" carbs like oats, corn, fruit but I miss "fun" carbs like pretzels, cornbread, pancakes/waffles, and most critical :) chocolate. I think doing this, while staying within my deficit, should do no harm to my progress.

    I think another thing I can do is recipes. My food is pretty plain, and I think I'm getting bored. Anyone know a good turkey chili recipe? Or a protein treat recipe like homemade protein balls/bars? I need to make protein more fun, too.

    I think I need to treat myself to some non-food stuff too, like some nice gently used clothing. Or nice piece of jewelry.

    Tom, I don't think speeding up my rate of weight loss as the answer. I think one pound a week is a great rate of weight loss. I do kinda wish my hubs would complement me on my weight loss instead of saying "keep on going" but I have to recognize that validating myself is most important.



    This sounds like a good and productive thought process, Lisa.

    I may be biased, but I particularly think it's a good plan to figure out how to fit in a more satisfying mix of treat-like foods, within reason. I'd assume you wouldn't want to cut those things out of your life forever (I know I wouldn't!). This is a good time to start figuring out how to fit some in.

    On that pancake front, have you taken a look at something like Kodiak pancake mix? I find them very pancake-y, not weird. Made with water, 3 x 4" pancakes is 190 calories, 14g protein. Made with milk and an egg, they go up to 20g protein per serving, for only about 66-91 extra calories depending on what fat level of dairy milk. I like my pancakes with plain Greek yogurt and fruit, which may not suit you, but it does up the protein even further.
  • lisakatz2
    lisakatz2 Posts: 566 Member
    edited July 6
    I LOVE Kodiak pancake mix. I think they make a high protein version (is that the one you are talking about?). I've been denying myself pancakes since the start of my weight loss journey. Hubs loves them too. Think it's time to start incorporating them into my diet. We use low-fat (2%) milk in ours and always add an egg. Never tried topping them with Greek yogurt. I'm going to try it.

    I'm going to make turkey chili tomorrow too. Going to Google a recipe. I love chili and make versions with top sirloin and chuck roast but I'd like to lower the calories even further.
  • AnnPT77
    AnnPT77 Posts: 34,598 Member
    lisakatz2 wrote: »
    Update: I'm down 14 pounds now. I am so close to 15 pounds down I can taste it! Also, down a half inch on my belly.

    I purchased for myself a pretty antique, Australian opal and gold Edwardian ring. The opal looks flashy in the photos/video. It's surrounded by tiny seed pearls. I haven't gotten myself something nice in a long while. It's currently being sized by the seller and will be on its way.

    This morning my hubs made Kodiak Power Pancakes for us, using skim milk and one whole egg. They came out great! Ate them with a couple of teaspoons of "All Fruit" unsweetened preserves.

    Chili came out great. Hubs doesn't care for it :p but it's for me anyway. Now I'm on the lookout for a lower-calorie version of beef stroganoff.

    Good show! That ring sounds lovely, and I'm glad the pancakes and chili were satisfying.

    I've messed around a bit with making stroganoff with plain nonfat Greek yogurt rather than sour cream. (Mushroom, since I'm veg, not beef; but I don't think that matters). It still takes some thickening, and I haven't tried anything other than flour. The yogurt may split if it gets too hot IME, so I'd simmer enough to thicken with just the broth or other liquid, then add the yogurt and heat more gently just until nicely warmed. (Different brands of yogurt may behave differently.)

    That's one option to consider for lightening stroganoff. There are lots of lower-calorie/lightened beef stroganoff recipes online, but I usually just mess with things rather than following recipes.
  • lisakatz2
    lisakatz2 Posts: 566 Member
    edited July 13
    I found this:

    https://sweetsavoryandsteph.com/healthy-beef-stroganoff/

    Looks pretty good, uses a mixture of sour cream and nonfat yogurt. Don't know about the olive oil cooking spray......I've found that when I cook with nonstick spray the pan dries out quickly. Maybe just use a smaller amount of oil?
  • Corina1143
    Corina1143 Posts: 3,797 Member
    edited July 13
    My very wise dietitian told me:
    Take 100 calories a day for what you WANT, rather than need. Your soul needs it. It can be a mini candy bar or bite of ice cream if you're a sweets person. Or it can be full fat milk instead of skim(my personal choice).
  • lisakatz2
    lisakatz2 Posts: 566 Member
    Every failed diet I've ever started began with the conviction "No chocolate!" :p
  • AnnPT77
    AnnPT77 Posts: 34,598 Member
    lisakatz2 wrote: »
    I found this:

    https://sweetsavoryandsteph.com/healthy-beef-stroganoff/

    Looks pretty good, uses a mixture of sour cream and nonfat yogurt. Don't know about the olive oil cooking spray......I've found that when I cook with nonstick spray the pan dries out quickly. Maybe just use a smaller amount of oil?

    I usually use liquid oil for cooking (like in a frying or saute pan), but don't use very much, usually less than 5 grams, and 3 is often enough (noting that I'm cooking for one, so this would be something like an 8 inch frying pan). It matters a bit what's cooking.

    Spray olive oil should be just like liquid olive oil, if the same amount, though, unless there's some kind of additional ingredient listed that might change things. Some just have oil. Some nonstick sprays have an emulsifier, like lecithin, and that performs differently. If it's just oil, the spray can can go on the scale, zero then spray, put back on scale to read the amount used. Weighing is better for oil, anyway: It's calorie dense, and the label value of zero calories is for like a fraction of a second spray. That's not enough for most anything that really needs oil at all, I think.

    Cooking with less oil IME also goes better if I manage the heat level carefully.
  • lisakatz2
    lisakatz2 Posts: 566 Member
    tomcustombuilder wrote: »
    Corina1143 wrote: »
    My very wise dietitian told me:
    Take 100 calories a day for what you WANT, rather than need. Your soul needs it. It can be a mini candy bar or bite of ice cream if you're a sweets person. Or it can be full fat milk instead of skim(my personal choice).
    lol @ a BITE of ice cream that’s like saying have only 1 chip…….

    I concur about the ice cream thing. I find it difficult to portion out ice cream. One spoonful isn't satisfying to me. One thing I think I can do is go to my local gelato shop and get the "kiddie" size cup,
    which is quite small, much smaller than the adult small. It's been hotter than hell here in L.A. and I've been craving a cold dessert.

    Update, I'm down to 183.5. Tomcustombuilder said I should feel better and better as I lose weight, but I don't feel it yet. My hips and stomach have stayed the same, and I'm still very much overweight........I can scarcely believe that I used to be 120 (110 at one point in my life). 63.5 lbs is a lot of weight. On some days I still feel low, but staying consistent with my calorie intake keeps me going both mentally and physically.
  • elisa123gal
    elisa123gal Posts: 4,333 Member
    I like how you phrased that.. " I feel fat". we all have those periods of time when we feel "yuck" about ourselves. It will pass.. it is just a blip. You've lost 13 pounds and that's great...you can keep going.
    Look at it this way; Some people are very overweight and never "feel fat". and that keeps them fat. I don't like that you fee l low.. but better to feel fat and be getting truly skinnier than the opposite. I hope this phase passes quickly for you.. it will. :)
  • AnnPT77
    AnnPT77 Posts: 34,598 Member
    lisakatz2 wrote: »
    tomcustombuilder wrote: »
    Corina1143 wrote: »
    My very wise dietitian told me:
    Take 100 calories a day for what you WANT, rather than need. Your soul needs it. It can be a mini candy bar or bite of ice cream if you're a sweets person. Or it can be full fat milk instead of skim(my personal choice).
    lol @ a BITE of ice cream that’s like saying have only 1 chip…….

    I concur about the ice cream thing. I find it difficult to portion out ice cream. One spoonful isn't satisfying to me. One thing I think I can do is go to my local gelato shop and get the "kiddie" size cup,
    which is quite small, much smaller than the adult small. It's been hotter than hell here in L.A. and I've been craving a cold dessert.

    Update, I'm down to 183.5. Tomcustombuilder said I should feel better and better as I lose weight, but I don't feel it yet. My hips and stomach have stayed the same, and I'm still very much overweight........I can scarcely believe that I used to be 120 (110 at one point in my life). 63.5 lbs is a lot of weight. On some days I still feel low, but staying consistent with my calorie intake keeps me going both mentally and physically.

    I kind of agree with Tom about feeling better along the way, but I also kind of don't.

    Clarifying: I think it happens. I think there can be many NSVs (non-scale victories) along the way to goal, if we have our antennas up for them, too - and they can be motivating or encouraging.

    But: I think the true overall "feeling better" sinking in (beyond some smaller NSVs) is going to take a decent chunk of pounds before it happens. Ten pounds, 20 pounds, maybe 25 pounds for serious overall feelings, maybe? And that takes a while.

    Plus, I think for some of us there is that "need to tune in" thing. It's easy to turn one's attention to the discouragement side, the amount left to go, or similar. It can take consciously focusing on the positives to notice them.

    You're down 13 pounds from March to when you started this thread, and another 3.5 since then, so 16.5. That's wonderful, significant . . . but honestly probably not life-changing all by itself. The initial honeymoon is maybe over, and revolutionary quality of life improvement hasn't happened.

    This is maybe the "how committed are you?" phase. How to push through that is pretty individual. A few things I can think of are:

    * Focusing on sustainability, the learning and practicing new habits part. If that involves losing even more slowly, that's potentially OK. (I think I said something similar earlier in the thread. ;) )
    * If you haven't already, maybe read the whole NSVs thread from the beginning (chip away at it). See what other people noticed and liked en route. Maybe that'll help.
    https://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/discussion/1275030/whats-your-most-recent-nsv/p1
    * Maybe consider a gratitude bullet journal. That's taking a tiny number of minutes every day to think of and write down 3 or 5 positive things - maybe accomplishments or results that flow from your health-improvement efforts, but really anything you're grateful for or feel good about.

    That's kind of lame, but it's what I've got. At some point(s), long term gradual improvement efforts of any nature are likely to feel like a bit of a slog . . . at least that's been my experience. IMO, character arises (or reveals itself) from how we respond in those circumstances. Keep going. Find ways to keep going.

    Best wishes, sincerely.
  • sollyn23l2
    sollyn23l2 Posts: 1,783 Member
    lisakatz2 wrote: »
    I'm 182.5 now. Only one pound, but I'm on track to weigh in at 180 for my trip to Palm Springs 3 weeks from this past Friday. So hard not to be fixated on the numbers, and to be patient.

    As NSVs go, I've lost an inch off my bust (*sigh*) an inch off my belly (yeah!!!!) and a half inch off my hips. I can wear XL bikini bottoms instead of 2XL.

    1 inch off your waist and dropping pants sizes is amazing! So proud of you.
  • p8m6bwghh9
    p8m6bwghh9 Posts: 248 Member
    I use cocoa powder, Ghiradelli dark chocolate or rxbar minis (chocolate sea salt & peanut butter chocolate) when I get a hankerin for chocolate. I will be 63 in November and also sometimes get caught up in the coulda, woulda, shoulda game. I hope you enjoy your trip!
  • fmh1512
    fmh1512 Posts: 4 Member
    Youve got this… I find helpful to feed my mind eg find second hand book websites with healthy eating cook books for new meal ideas or listening to Zoe free podcasts helps. I seen you like chocolate… my go to is curly wurly … it’s under 100 cals. Sometimes cut in half and eat half lunch and other half tea. But ofc must keep to calorie deficit!
  • lisakatz2
    lisakatz2 Posts: 566 Member
    fmh1512 wrote: »
    Youve got this… I find helpful to feed my mind eg find second hand book websites with healthy eating cook books for new meal ideas or listening to Zoe free podcasts helps. I seen you like chocolate… my go to is curly wurly … it’s under 100 cals. Sometimes cut in half and eat half lunch and other half tea. But ofc must keep to calorie deficit!

    I haven't seen Curly Wurlys here in the States. My favorite UK chocolate bar is the Lion Bar. I give them to my husband to hide and have him cut off 1/4 hunks at a time. I have no control when it comes to the Lion Bar!

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