She's just not that into you.

Options
keef1972
keef1972 Posts: 411 Member
in Chit-Chat
Hey ladies and gents.
My friends and I have had this debate, and need some input. How does a guy determine that his wife is just not into him anymore, yet she says everything is good, etc, etc....

I said no kissing/sex/ etc.......
«134

Replies

  • djeffreys10
    djeffreys10 Posts: 2,312 Member
    Options
    When my ex wife was having sex with another guy, it kind of gave it away.
  • keef1972
    keef1972 Posts: 411 Member
    Options
    OUCH!! That hurts!
  • JustAboutDelicious_wechanged
    JustAboutDelicious_wechanged Posts: 2,487 Member
    Options
    When my ex wife was having sex with another guy, it kind of gave it away.

    Awww :(
    2ecdmkojpg_zps1686ba33.gif
  • latenitelucy
    latenitelucy Posts: 1,314 Member
    Options
    I agree with lack of affection. You can usually tell if someone is just going through the motions too
  • callmenikita
    callmenikita Posts: 118 Member
    Options
    when she starts arguments or picks fights over all the small things!
  • Rjohnsonjr32
    Rjohnsonjr32 Posts: 117
    Options
    When she is silent, or when she says everything is ok.....
  • keef1972
    keef1972 Posts: 411 Member
    Options
    That was the impression I got.
  • caroldot
    caroldot Posts: 388 Member
    Options
    Without more detail, that's a hard question. Just because they're not affectionate doesn't mean she's not into him anymore. There could be a number of factors.......Maybe she has some of her own issues going on - maybe she doesn't feel good/confident about herself. I know for myself and alot of women, if I'm not feeling very confident, it will show in my actions towards my significant other. There could also be other issues in the marriage like she's feeling stressed over finances or her job or maybe she he's not fulfilling her needs and its resulting in lack of affection towards him.

    Why doesn't he just ask her? Its his wife after all!
  • TheSlorax
    TheSlorax Posts: 2,401 Member
    Options
    it may be a hormonal or libido issue. unfortunately instead of a visually obvious symptom like ED in men, women tend to hide their sex problems a lot better. it also could be a side effect of medication, etc. lots of different things. just have "your friend" talk to her, she'll fess up if he GENTLY presses to find out what's wrong - just don't be accusatory. good luck.
  • caroldot
    caroldot Posts: 388 Member
    Options
    Women are complicated! We will say "everything is good" or "fine" 20 times before we finally open up & spill our guts about what the problem is! And usually, if he's just observant, the truth is coming out in other ways. If he really wants the marriage to work, he will be supportive and patient. The truth will come out whatever that may be!
  • Katiemarie4488
    Katiemarie4488 Posts: 242 Member
    Options
    Without more detail, that's a hard question. Just because they're not affectionate doesn't mean she's not into him anymore. There could be a number of factors.......Maybe she has some of her own issues going on - maybe she doesn't feel good/confident about herself. I know for myself and alot of women, if I'm not feeling very confident, it will show in my actions towards my significant other. There could also be other issues in the marriage like she's feeling stressed over finances or her job or maybe she he's not fulfilling her needs and its resulting in lack of affection towards him.

    Why doesn't he just ask her? Its his wife after all!

    This....:wink:
  • Markguns
    Markguns Posts: 554 Member
    Options
    When she is silent, or when she says everything is ok.....

    ^ that's always a bad sign... Bottom line; if your gut is telling your something is amiss, it is.
    Go Glimmer Twins! :laugh: :bigsmile:
  • Espressocycle
    Espressocycle Posts: 2,245 Member
    Options
    When my ex wife was having sex with another guy, it kind of gave it away.

    My ex actually started treating me nice and being great in bed when she had a boyfriend... so I guess that's a sign - if your wife starts being nice to you and putting out, it's over.
  • Lizzybugz
    Lizzybugz Posts: 26 Member
    Options
    The reality is that, at some point, we have to let go of what we think and trust what our significant other is saying. It could be something entirely unrelated to your relationship that is bothering her or maybe there isn't anything wrong at all and she is simply growing as an individual and in a weird place. Relationships go through ebbs and flows and change all of the time. The beauty of them is that they are not static....just as we are not static, but fluid in our own lives.

    I am not saying that something is not possibly amiss, but worrying about it won't help you and could make your relationship worse because it may drive her crazy to have you asking if she is okay constantly. Just tell her you will be there for her when she is ready to talk because you can tell she isn't herself and then do something sweet for her. Libido and how conversational and loving a woman is all can fluctuate depending on her cycle and it doesn't mean she doesn't love you anymore.

    What about counseling? Have you considered going to counseling with her? Have you tried pulling back and letting her have some space? Have you tried journaling about your feelings and analyzing what exactly is bothering you about where you are in your relationship right now?
  • caroldot
    caroldot Posts: 388 Member
    Options
    Here's what you do....

    Ask her to put a another log on the fire, then cook you up some bacon and some beans. After that, have her go out to the car and change the tire, wash your socks and sew up your old jeans. Get her to fill your pipe and then go fetch your slippers followed by another glass of tea.

    And then sit her down and ask her what's wrong.

    You must've just been reading the "7 Tips for Keeping Your Man (1950's)" topic! :tongue:
  • likitisplit
    likitisplit Posts: 9,420 Member
    Options
    Try being "in to" her. If you have a relationship where you share the happenings of your day and listen to hers. Where you communicate your thoughts and goals and stories with each other. Where you make time for the two of you and have a level of intimacy that transcends sexual transactions, it's pretty easy to tell when there's something missing.
  • crackur
    crackur Posts: 473 Member
    Options
    I think it has gone to far once she goes on another amusement ride.......hm
  • caroldot
    caroldot Posts: 388 Member
    Options
    Here's what you do....

    Ask her to put a another log on the fire, then cook you up some bacon and some beans. After that, have her go out to the car and change the tire, wash your socks and sew up your old jeans. Get her to fill your pipe and then go fetch your slippers followed by another glass of tea.

    And then sit her down and ask her what's wrong.

    You must've just been reading the "7 Tips for Keeping Your Man (1950's)" topic! :tongue:

    it actually worked for me. I told her that she should appreciate that I let her wash car every Sunday and that I warn her when she's getting fat. I reminded that one day I'm going to take her fishing with me and that I'm always nice to her sister, taking her out for a ride every Sunday night.

    Yeah probably bcuz she reached her boiling point and had enough and exploded on you! LOL! :laugh:

Categories