hooking up with the ex good or bad

Broderick50
Broderick50 Posts: 842 Member
in Chit-Chat
Ok I know this one may get locked quick. But yesterday my recent ex like 3 months ago told me she wants to be friends with benefits. Usually I'm not friends with any of my exes just not a good policy, but I'm leaning toward breaking that rule. My question is do you guys think it can be done and not get complicated and messy with our breakup being recent it will be hard to seperate feelings.
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Replies

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  • Followingsea
    Followingsea Posts: 407 Member
    Bad idea, IMO.

    With exes the best way to recover is to go no contact and STAY no contact, for a good length of time.

    If you still even have ghosts of feelings for your ex, sleeping with her is just going to fan them back up into life and then you'll be in for a world of emotional hurt. She's an ex for a reason, right?
  • besaro
    besaro Posts: 1,858 Member
    this won't end well.
  • ilmb87
    ilmb87 Posts: 216 Member
    Just say no.
  • herblackwings39
    herblackwings39 Posts: 3,930 Member
    It will probably get complicated and messy. Most things usually do. If one of you were to develop feelings and the other doesn't you're just asking for trouble.
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  • Broderick50
    Broderick50 Posts: 842 Member
    Ok I know this one may get locked quick. But yesterday my recent ex like 3 months ago told me she wants to be friends with benefits. Usually I'm not friends with any of my exes just not a good policy, but I'm leaning toward breaking that rule. My question is do you guys think it can be done and not get complicated and messy with our breakup being recent it will be hard to seperate feelings.

    I thought you were giving back all the gifts?
    Dude, I can hardly keep up.

    I did give everything back she approached me with this yesterday
  • OneThrone
    OneThrone Posts: 77 Member
    Not good. She's an ex for a reason.
  • FerretBuellerr
    FerretBuellerr Posts: 468 Member
    Definetly will not end well if you pursue that. At all. Jealousy will ensue eventually when either yourself of herself find another partner.
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  • So_Much_Fab
    So_Much_Fab Posts: 1,146 Member
    Can it be done? Sure. But why would you want to at this point in time?
  • donthesitate
    donthesitate Posts: 255 Member
    Bad idea, in my experience
  • harvo
    harvo Posts: 4,676 Member
    Hit it and quit it!
  • SapphCas
    SapphCas Posts: 32 Member
    Getting back with an ex isn't always complicated. Circumstance dependent.

    However, being friends with benefits with an ex always is.
  • TX_Rhon
    TX_Rhon Posts: 1,549 Member
    Nope - not a good idea because you mentioned the "F" word - feelings!

    Find a FWB if that's what you want but with someone else - someone you have had no previous bad history with. Just my thoughts.

    :flowerforyou:
  • Mia_RagazzaTosta
    Mia_RagazzaTosta Posts: 4,885 Member
    Very few FWB situations are true FWB situations. Usually there's one party secretly hoping it turns into more.
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  • charliex2202
    charliex2202 Posts: 4,281 Member
    I completely understand the urge to accept something rather then nothing. but I think you are likely to end up worse off then when you started. there is a reason she became an ex, move on you are better than a friends with benefits kind of deal,,...

    ~Charlie
  • Broderick50
    Broderick50 Posts: 842 Member
    Can it be done? Sure. But why would you want to at this point in time?

    Why cause it's been 3 months since I had sex and there ain't a lot of prospects in Beckley,WV.
  • Topsking2010
    Topsking2010 Posts: 2,245 Member
    No Way!!!


    Sounds tempting but will mostly likely lead to drama.


    Move on!!!
  • Broderick50
    Broderick50 Posts: 842 Member
    Ok I know this one may get locked quick. But yesterday my recent ex like 3 months ago told me she wants to be friends with benefits. Usually I'm not friends with any of my exes just not a good policy, but I'm leaning toward breaking that rule. My question is do you guys think it can be done and not get complicated and messy with our breakup being recent it will be hard to seperate feelings.

    I thought you were giving back all the gifts?
    Dude, I can hardly keep up.

    I did give everything back she approached me with this yesterday

    is she bringing everything back?
    well I sure hope she does
    otherwise, it ain't flipping fair is it.

    She put everything up in her house like it had been there for years but she still wears the ring I gave her.
  • ElliottTN
    ElliottTN Posts: 1,614 Member
    I don't think that will end well but I guess it highly depends on how y'all broke up. Can you emotionally handle the fact that you will probably not be the only one tapping that? Can she? If not then I'd stay away.

    But then again, if she's a rockstar in the bed it may be worth the associated destruction derby that will probably take place. Just take care of yourself emotionally first and don't start another thread when she puts a tire iron through your front windshield when we finds out you've been exploring other options at the same time.
  • Mr_Knight
    Mr_Knight Posts: 9,532 Member
    Won't end well.

    But the journey could be entertaining.

    And it sounds like you're going to do it anyway, so may as well get it over with! :smile:
  • QuietBloom
    QuietBloom Posts: 5,413 Member
    Hit it and quit it!

    Yeah, like THAT won't cause problems. :noway:

    Like someone else said: She's an ex for a reason. Keep it that way.
  • lauren3101
    lauren3101 Posts: 1,853 Member
    There are three ways this could turn out:

    Option 1.
    You will have these 'benefits' and both thoroughly enjoy them until one of you finds another partner. Then jealousy and problems will ensue.

    Option 2:
    You will have these 'benefits' and both thoroughly enjoy them until one of you suggests getting back together. One will say no, and jealousy and problems will ensue.

    Option 3:
    You will have these 'benefits' and both thoroughly enjoy them until one of you suggests getting back together. The other will agree, and eventually you will no doubt split for the same reasons you split the first time, until one of you suggests being 'friends with benefits'.
  • Greywalk
    Greywalk Posts: 193 Member
    Are you...no you are aren't...MAN Rule # 1 She is an ex for a reason, never go back.
  • Followingsea
    Followingsea Posts: 407 Member
    Can it be done? Sure. But why would you want to at this point in time?

    Why cause it's been 3 months since I had sex and there ain't a lot of prospects in Beckley,WV.

    Dude... keep looking, seriously. This is the express train to heartache. 3 months isn't so bad.
  • Adw7677
    Adw7677 Posts: 201 Member
    Bad idea, IMO.

    With exes the best way to recover is to go no contact and STAY no contact, for a good length of time.

    If you still even have ghosts of feelings for your ex, sleeping with her is just going to fan them back up into life and then you'll be in for a world of emotional hurt. She's an ex for a reason, right?


    ^^^ All of this. Go get a different friend with benefits. There are plenty of girls that like sex, they just can't announce it the way that guys do.
  • Broderick50
    Broderick50 Posts: 842 Member
    Can it be done? Sure. But why would you want to at this point in time?

    Why cause it's been 3 months since I had sex and there ain't a lot of prospects in Beckley,WV.

    Dude... keep looking, seriously. This is the express train to heartache. 3 months isn't so bad.

    when you were used to 3 times a day for the last year 3 months is awful

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