Achieved Goal, feeling dissappointed
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I also cant afford a gym membership either right now. But I had great results with Jillian Michaels 30 days shred and it was super cheap like 10 dollars or around there. all you need is some floor space in front of a tv and 3-5 lb hand weights ( I used to weight train so I thought 3 lbs would be way to light but trust me it isnt!) lol great toning and definition. Right now I am trying Ripped in 30 also from Jillian Michaels and Brazilian But Lift that a friend is letting be borrow. HTH0
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Sites to check out:
Benderfitness.com
Dailyhiit.com or bodyrock.tv0 -
I completely understand where you're coming from. I set my original goal weight to the higher range of my "healthy" BMI. The day I achieved it was very anti-climactic. I've since surpassed that weight by almost 10 pounds and changed my goal weight, but I thought I'd be happier on that day...instead, I thought "meh, I'm still heavy." I guess I don't have any advice for you other than I know how you feel...0
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The Y is cheap and has more weights than you will ever be able to afford at home.
PS, I wonder what it is that people think they are supposed to look like, anyway? When I was 20 years old, running 20 miles a week and in the best shape of my life, and right in the middle of healthy BMI, I got disgusted and quit because I was sick of adding up every tiny little bite, doing all this work I didn't like to do, and I still wasn't happy with how I looked. Now, looking back, I can see I looked just fine. I was too busy comparing myself to models in magazines who are all 6ft tall and 20 lbs medically underweight. Since giving up I have gained almost 100 lbs and now I know what "fat" really is.
These people who look like models and movie stars really do spend their entire life in the gym. I asked this absolutely BEAUTIFUL girl in the gym one day what she was doing and she said she works out 3 HOURS A DAY and had had plastic surgery. Who wants to live like that?0 -
I know how you feel. I was 137 when I began a year ago, now I am 122. I thought that I would lose all of my stomach by now and be happy with who I am, but unfortunately I am not. Now, I am working on toning by doing 20 mins of cardio and the rest weights. Sure, you might have reached your goal weight but what were your expectations when you set that goal? If you know that deep down you tried your hardest, then you should be happy. Think of the accomplishment you have achieved! Losing weight is tough and you should be proud of yourself for doing that! Good luck!0
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Congratulations on reaching your goal. That is truly awesome. Body image is such a difficult topic and I think most people do themselves a great disservice. Changing focus to being healthy as opposed to looking a certain way or being a certain weight could help give you the satisfaction you desire. Otherwise I recommend Zumba as a really great way to tone those muscles, and it is fun too.
Oh, and maybe you need an awesome celebration to celebrate your success. That's what I am planning on...when I eventually get there.
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I met my goal weight in February 2010 and I felt exactly the same way. I was overweight as young as 10 years old so I was pretty comfortable with being the big guy. I was 242 when I graduated from high school in 1992 and got as high as 318 over the next 16 years.
When I reached my goal I was expecting the AHA moment that didn't come...but I knew I had to keep working hard. I wasn't happy with the lumps and bumps and often commented to my wife that I still need to lose more. One day we were downtown having this conversation and she points out this guy walking across the street. I said, ya so what that guy is skinny...she says YOU LOOK JUST LIKE HIM! Stop being critical of yourself and be proud of your accomplishment. My point here is after 30 years of seeing myself a certain way it didn't change just because I lost weight. I am still amazed when I see pictures of myself next to other people I view as skinny and I still don't put myself in that category.
I have maintained for nearly 4 years and most of the trouble spots I had when I hit my goal are still there. I work out more now than I did while I was losing so I have come to the realization that this is it for me and have chosen to view them as a badge of honor for all the hard work it took. 0 -
Thank you everyone for your support.
*sigh* weight training. I just can't seem to wrap my head around it.
1. I can't afford a gym membership right now.
2. tiny little house, so no place to put a home gym
3. the above two are my favorite excuses to use to deflect the fact that I don't like the idea of weight training!
I have 2lbs and 5lbs weights at home that I use irregularity...yes I know that won't cut it. I was thinking about Pilates or yoga in the new year.
Congratulations on hitting your goal!
You don't need a gym membership or a home gym.
Get on you tube and look up the Jillian Michaels' DVDs - Ripped in 30, 30 Day Shred etc.
I chucked the gym membership for these 20-30min work outs using only 5lb weights and my own body weight (hello push ups and planks) and I am looking far more toned than I ever did while going to the gym! And I work out with only 2m x 3m floor space.0 -
I can recommend Jillian Michael's yoga meltdown. It is kind of a power yoga that uses your body wight mixed in with power moves. It's great. Ripped in 30 has a lot of strength based moves as well and you only need a set of hand weights.0
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A couple of weeks ago I reached my goal weight....actually, I exceeded my goal weight by 2lbs. Yeah me! But after the initial HOORAY I found myself being more critical than ever. I adjusted my goal to lose more because all I see are the lumps and bumps that still remain. I guess I don't really have a question to ask, I just wish I could be satisfied with the positive changes to my body and not focus on the negative aspects, one being loose skin under my chin! Yuck! Maybe after 8 months of dieting I've become too obsessive about things.
First off, always remember the wonderful progress you've made already. That is a good thing. Never forget that.
A challenge, especially in the "maintenance" world, is that our bodies are not machines. I don't think any of us will be able to look at the mirror, smile, and cheer "PERFECT!". Our bodies change. It's perfectly normal to reach your goal and say "you know what, I'd like to see what I can do to work on X area".
In many ways, our bodies are like houses or cars. While they may be great as they are, over time, you find parts that need to be maintained or could stand to be upgraded. It's not a strike against the house or car, it's just what happens as time moves on.0 -
I think once I'm in body composition mode, I'll do yoga. I like yoga because your own body is the "weight" you "lift". And you can do it almost anywhere. I just need to learn all the moves and whatnot.
I practice yoga for 5-10 hours a week as time permits. I've found that not only is my body looking--and feeling-- good, but my head space is better and I'm more focused and positive.0 -
@LoriVaughan69,
Thanks for the inspiration!
Your story and all the advice from others has reinforced my need to reevaluate my plans as I approach my WS goal.
Thank you all.0 -
Bump0
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I don't go by weight anymore. I once dropped to 10lbs less then my goal weight of 200 lbs. I felt the same as you did. So I went and got dumb bells, and then I started lifting and gained 15 lbs back.0
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Get a kettlebell. There are plenty of free resources for working out with them online on youtube and at Fitness Blender. You can do most workouts in a 4'x8' space. If you can only get one at first, go a little heavier so you get more use out of it.0
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Thank you everyone for your support.
*sigh* weight training. I just can't seem to wrap my head around it.
1. I can't afford a gym membership right now.
2. tiny little house, so no place to put a home gym
3.][b the above two are my favorite excuses to use to deflect the fact that I don't like the idea of weight training! [/b]
I have 2lbs and 5lbs weights at home that I use irregularity...yes I know that won't cut it. I was thinking about Pilates or yoga in the new year.
I guess it's more about learning not to compare myself to other thinner people and learning to be happy with who I am...but is that settling? Should I always push myself? I agree, maybe I need to stop looking at the number now, I'll redo my measurements and I'll work at strengthening my core, and strengthening my mind.
I'm not sure these have been mentioned, but:
Get a set of resistance bands for around $25. Look up You are Your Own Gym and Convict Conditioning.
I cannot stress to you enough how much strength training can help the look of your body as well as how you feel about it. While heavy lifting is probably the most efficient way, it's not the ONLY way. Just because it's not an option for you right now doesn't mean that you can't still strength train.
Sorry, not letting you off the hook. :flowerforyou:
ETA: reading back I can see that Mr. Wolf already told you this. He's right, I'm right, go strength train.0 -
oh, the floppy chin/neck, I hear you! (although I sure don't see it in your profile pic!)
I'm excellent at Photoshop!0 -
Congratulations!! For some, it takes a REALLY long time for your eyes and your brain to adjust to the new you. I started maintance in February, so I am coming up on a year, and i am just now starting to see myself as others see me. What helped for me was weight training...it really does change the way your new skinny self looks. Much of the loose skin (not under my chin :mad:) seems to have been stretched back out by the muscle being built - especially on my thighs and bottom!
Good luck to you - and take your time getting used to how awesome you are!
thank you for this!0 -
For me, dropping the weight was easy. It's the mental junk that takes forever to clear.0
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I didn't read every response to this thread, so maybe someone has said this before...
It's become apparent to me that the things we see on our own bodies that we don't like, are things 99% of other people don't even notice. We are too critical of ourselves. So if it's about your image and how you think others see you, it's likely that others do not see the "bad" things you do. They just see a beautiful person who's reached their goal weight. I've been around enough to know that most women spend too much time worrying about things no one else notices.
Another thing... some lumps and jiggles won't go away (at least without surgery). Some things are always going to be there. Sorry if that is disappointing. If it's a baby pooch or tricep jiggle, it may be there to stay. But you are so much better off than you were before you started on your journey. I hope you celebrate yourself and what you see in the mirror.0 -
Bad news
Having been on this journey for over 15 years, lost over 100 lbs, passed a few milestones and now am the smallest, most toned I have ever been in my life... I still am always never satisfied with where I've got to and want to be somewhere else.
I would have given my right eye to be where I am today a year ago.. and now that I'm here, and in my mind, it's like.. really??? what about this lump, what about that hanging skin, what about that cellulite.
Sorry.. it goes on and on!
Good news
I am getting way better at appreciating where I am for longer periods of time and not ONLY being disappointed. So I used to rejoice at a measurement or clothes fitting better or smaller size for a day, then I was back to being disappointed. Now it's seasons of being relatively satisfied with my accomplishments. SO, I am hopeful that eventually I will be "here" and finally pleased or at least content generally with my fat loss and muscle gain and all my accomplishments!
Battle on!!!!!!0 -
I felt the same way until I was at the gym today sitting on the AB X machine. I was watching a guy use a jump rope and from the corner of my eye it looked like someone was staring at me. To myself I said "what's that skinny b*tch staring at?" It was the wall mirror! I was looking at myself from another angle lol!
Funny!0 -
bump, so I can remember this when I get the weight off0
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Perhaps change your goal from losing weight to increasing your fitness level? I've read many posts from folks who say maintaining weight is more difficult than losing weight. I'm not there yet, so can't confirm but I do know that weight loss for me is directly tied to my activity level. Congratulations to you for sticking with it!0
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I don't have a home gym, and I lift at home. I have a cheap, crappy bench and barbell I got off of craigslist. It won't work forever, but for $30 it's done me pretty well so far. It doesn't take up a lot of space, either. (although my boyfriend does get sick of running his foot into my plates in the morning...perhaps he needs to watch where he is going!)0
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I think people would be more happy if they have a goal bodyfat percentage rather than a goal weight since being fat or lean has nothing to do with your weight.0
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I think people would be more happy if they have a goal bodyfat percentage rather than a goal weight since being fat or lean has nothing to do with your weight.
I don't know, but it's not the number I'm unhappy with, it's that the number didn't result in what I thought it would. But then again, maybe it has and like many of you mentioned, I just can't see it yet. There are days when I think I look FANTASTIC. Today is one of them. :-) Of course it helps that someone gave me a complement today! Too bad I couldn't arrange for that to happen everyday! Maybe every morning I'll look in the mirror and say "you look smoking hot today". :happy:0 -
Thank you everyone for your support.
*sigh* weight training. I just can't seem to wrap my head around it.
1. I can't afford a gym membership right now.
2. tiny little house, so no place to put a home gym
3. the above two are my favorite excuses to use to deflect the fact that I don't like the idea of weight training!
I have 2lbs and 5lbs weights at home that I use irregularity...yes I know that won't cut it. I was thinking about Pilates or yoga in the new year.
I guess it's more about learning not to compare myself to other thinner people and learning to be happy with who I am...but is that settling? Should I always push myself? I agree, maybe I need to stop looking at the number now, I'll redo my measurements and I'll work at strengthening my core, and strengthening my mind.
Calisthenics! You don't need a gym membership or big house! Just room to do push ups, squats, lunges - use your weight to do curls and such! You CAN do this!!0 -
I get it. Maybe you should try exercise if you haven't? That tones ALOT and can even help with some skin stuff. Weight training twice a week and cardio a couple times a week, or try Zumba or kickboxing, which can work all areas of your body to get started. You'll like it once you get going and like the results.A couple of weeks ago I reached my goal weight....actually, I exceeded my goal weight by 2lbs. Yeah me! But after the initial HOORAY I found myself being more critical than ever. I adjusted my goal to lose more because all I see are the lumps and bumps that still remain. I guess I don't really have a question to ask, I just wish I could be satisfied with the positive changes to my body and not focus on the negative aspects, one being loose skin under my chin! Yuck! Maybe after 8 months of dieting I've become too obsessive about things.0 -
I think people would be more happy if they have a goal bodyfat percentage rather than a goal weight since being fat or lean has nothing to do with your weight.
BF % is very hard to measure accurately. And weight certainly has something to do with it. Just not everything.
But inches are decent proxy, controlling for height and weight.0
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