Why did you dump the person above you?
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He was getting too spiritual for my taste0
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She complained about my collection of torture devices.0
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She didnt like that my collection was bigger than hers...
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He had collection envy0
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He left crumbs in the bed...0
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She was too sexy.0
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Her legs were so long they took up the whole bed.0
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I was jealous of her boobs0
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she was just too cute.0
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She wanted me to call her boss0
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She was too demanding and kept coming up with new rules.0
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Old Navy was his favorite place to shop0
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Didn't share his SmartWater.0
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She was always leaving lipstick on the pillows. TAKE OFF YOUR MAKEUP WHEN YOU SLEEP, WOMAN.0
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She always called her bewbs "the pillows"...
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She didn't appreciate the pillows0
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She wouldn't let me rest my weary head on her pillows.0
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He was obsessed with fluffing my pillows0
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She kept covering the pillows and wouldn't let me fluff them.0
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Stole my beloved cat!0
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Because I was jealous of her awesome shoes.0
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We Lived to far apart!!0
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I would wake up and catch her staring at me. Oops, obviously I don't type fast enough...0
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She went caving without me.0
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He was spelunking in other girls' caves.0
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She stole my name0
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She went on epic road trips without me0
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He insulted my lady bits.0
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See what happend wassss!!!!0
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Because I thought his name on here was Blowme0
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