I am the woman in the freeweights section of the gym

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Replies

  • JoRocka
    JoRocka Posts: 17,525 Member
    I've got a friend who lifts a lot and I've chatted to him about starting. He said that everyone gets judged to a certain extent when they start unless it's obvious that they're learning, so he's offered to teach me and be my 'shield' from nosy judging lifters!

    I have two worries - one, that I would be ruining his workout for him by making him hang around and help me, and two, finding the time! I mostly work out at uni after lectures either by taking classes (spinning mostly, sticking in other things here and there like zumba or body combat when I fancy something different) or by swimming. There's a women's only free weights class on the timetable, but it's only once a week and it clashes with lifesaving training so I can't go! I'm concerned that going elsewhere would eat into more time that I don't really have to spare since I'm in my final year and supposedly writing a dissertation and preparing for a hideous amount of language exams!

    Actually I lied, I have a couple more concerns - one, I'm moving to Germany next year and don't know if I'd be able to continue lifting where I'll be living. What happens if you lift for a few months and then stop? Will I lose the strength and pile weight back on?
    Two - I know I won't get bulky and that lifting is amazing for your body. BUT will the scale drop much at all? I'm not worried in terms of measuring progress, it's purely that I'm in a 6 month diet bet and don't want to lose the money!

    Your friend offered to help and will enjoy it, so don't worry about that. They offered for a reason.

    Lifting takes less time than any type of cardio gym class.

    There is nothing to worry about if you start and stop. If you start and stop, you will gain the benefits of it for quite a while. It will decrease weight gain, not increase. And why worry about that...what if you love it and love the results (I did). You can always continue with doing strength training that just uses your body weight.

    I don't know anything about how weight loss bets work. But, if it means losing your muscle and having long term struggles with lack of shape, loose skin, flabbiness, fat lumps instead of firm muscle...then what's more important the money or your long term happiness, and body shape. But aside from that, you will not gain, if you are eating at a deficit. You will simply lose more fat and retain muscle.

    yes- you are taking his time up- but he offered. Don't abuse it - be grateful- take him to lunch or buy him a six pack and just keep learning. Don't nag- but be communicative. (hey I lifted the other day and it was great- thanks for your help- or I was planning on going on Sunday if you are free- if not that's okay- that sort of thing)

    They have gyms and free weights in Germany too ;)

    Face the lockers when you change. Or you can be the douche that changes in the bathroom stall or shower until you get past your discomfort. If the locker room doesn't have curtains on the showers, you may need to consider a different gym. 'Cos that's just ridiculous.
    considering she said it was at her work- I agree being in the locker room with people you work with is weird.

    I am pretty comfortable with myself- but I would find that wildly uncomfortable. There is absolutely no way I would want to be nekkids in front of my boss or co-workers.

    I also find it a little uncomfortable because I know people get skeeved out with the commando thing and I don't wear under pinnings under my capris. So yeah- 9/10 I go pee- and change my pants in one feel swoop- go out and do the rest of it at my locker.

    Everyone has their own comfort level- do what you have to do- don't let that hold you back from improving your body- there are ways around it!!!
  • JennMairi
    JennMairi Posts: 42 Member

    Lifting takes less time than any type of cardio gym class.

    It's the travel time I'm more worried about. If I'm already on campus then going to an hour long class takes just that hour. If I go elsewhere to lift, I have to factor that time in. My friend lifts at a different gym, because our uni gym gets pretty crowded (with massive 'bro' type lifters!) and the membership's pretty pricey, which is also a problem.

    There is nothing to worry about if you start and stop. If you start and stop, you will gain the benefits of it for quite a while. It will decrease weight gain, not increase. And why worry about that...what if you love it and love the results (I did). You can always continue with doing strength training that just uses your body weight.

    That helps, thanks! If I find some videos and do body weight strength training at home for now, will that have a similar, if not as extreme, effect?
    yes- you are taking his time up- but he offered. Don't abuse it - be grateful- take him to lunch or buy him a six pack and just keep learning. Don't nag- but be communicative. (hey I lifted the other day and it was great- thanks for your help- or I was planning on going on Sunday if you are free- if not that's okay- that sort of thing)

    I think I'll have to pay him in chicken... he's big on protein and doesn't drink!
    They have gyms and free weights in Germany too ;)

    Haha sorry, just realised it kinda looks like I was all 'oh my gosh Germany is sooooooooo weird they don't even have gyms what?' when what I really meant was 'the closest gym with free weights I can find (with google) is a 45 minute walk away, I won't have a car and I don't think I'll be able to afford membership since they don't have prices listed and I'm not technically going to be getting paid next year!' Also I don't know what the neighbourhood's like. I guess I could run to the gym, but it's along a pretty busy road by the looks of things. Not sure how much free time I'll have either, and a round trip of an hour and a half rather limits how often I could go and how long I could stay.
  • desgmz
    desgmz Posts: 19 Member
    bump
  • MissB46
    MissB46 Posts: 143 Member
    I am a regular in the 'boys' gym, I started my stronglift training yesterday Squats, Barbell Rows and Bench Presses.

    When it came to bench pressing all benches were full (this was at 6.30 in the morning!!), so I walked up to this guy and asked him how many sets he had left as he had been on the bench a while....he just gave me a proper dirty look, grunted at me - which translated to 'One set', what a miserable sod!!

    And then when he was finished the cheeky bastid didn't even bother to take his weights back off....but in hindsight - I can actually bench more than him....made me giggle - childish I know!!!!:smile:
  • JolienvanH
    JolienvanH Posts: 20 Member
    but in hindsight - I can actually bench more than him....made me giggle - childish I know!!!!:smile:

    That made me laugh! I love it when you see those guys loving themselves in the mirror and you look at their weights and you do more.
  • violetrix
    violetrix Posts: 60 Member
    bump
  • OverDoIt
    OverDoIt Posts: 332 Member
    The Iron does not care what your color, sex, religion, or any other label you can throw at it. The Iron can be the light in the darkest of times, and your deadliest enemy in others. Each disciple of the Iron way, has their own journey, and their own demons. We cleanse our mind and bodies with our sweat. Chit chat is for the weak it the Iron dojo. Clock in and get to work, the Iron does not care how much more you can lift than your other brothers and sisters.
  • nz_deevaa
    nz_deevaa Posts: 12,209 Member
    How did I miss this thread?!
  • harphy
    harphy Posts: 290 Member
    This thread is GREATNESS oveload, period!

    I'm the also the only woman who lifts in the "boys" area. I say boys because my gym is in the high school complex and my gym pals are mostly teenagers. At the beginning they were looking from the corners of their eyes if they see right :tongue: , but now they are getting used to me. It can be so intimidating and frightfull to move to THAT corner of the gym and set your weights! I wish there was another woman around...or two, or three! The more of us are in the "restricted area" the sooner a woman who can lift more than man will be a normal sight.

    Keep going!:drinker:
  • jrowens3224
    jrowens3224 Posts: 31 Member
    Love this.:heart:

    Yes, you may be the only woman there. Yes, you may get some glances (but they glance at each other too) But getting in there and getting it done is far better than wishing you would have. Plus, I have noticed that pretty much everyone leaves each other to their own devices anyway...at least in my gym.
  • MSClark11
    MSClark11 Posts: 6 Member
    I love this post! All of my workouts now involve free weights and I'm almost always the only girl there. I get stares and sometimes I feel like I'm being judged, but I just focus on my workout and move on. :-)
  • berlinberlinveg
    berlinberlinveg Posts: 7 Member
    I've read a lot of recommendations for the "New Rules of Lifting for Women", I've looked in the preview and I don't know how much of it is useful to me. It looked like a nice read and I might check if the library has it, but it doesn't look like the book I'm looking for for my bookshelf and gym bag.

    I'm looking for a get straight to business book with detailed illustrations and explanations of exercises (not 30 pages trying to convince me to do strenght training, I'm not afraid of bulking up, lol, And not nutritional advice either, just exercises and how they're done, since that's what I need, a very basic book).
    I saw this one "Anatomy for Strength and Fitness Training for Women: An Illustrated Guide to Your Muscles in Action"
    and it looks like it's more what I'm looking for, does anybody have it?

    Or have any other recommendations? :)
    A book with a simple program in it would also be nice, but not necessary.
  • Myhaloslipped
    Myhaloslipped Posts: 4,317 Member
    The only thing I felt bit nervous about when I first began lifting with all of the guys was the fact that I could only bench press the bar, lol. Other than that, I really enjoy it. The guys at my gym are extremely helpful and motivating.
  • Immerito
    Immerito Posts: 105 Member
    Great post!
  • Flamencoflynnie
    Flamencoflynnie Posts: 61 Member
    My husbands gym is very well equipped and has a Barbell Club in a separate power lifting room. They are offering a free Ladies Lifting Clinic in a few weeks.

    This is what they are offering.

    'Dispelling the 'Big Myth' that weights make women bulky. Perfecting the Squat, Deadlift and Bench Press. Learning safe technique.

    Benefits of Lifting: Increases your Base Metabolic Rate; Burn more calories at rest. Helps you create your desired body shape. Promotes toned, defined muscles. Increased Strength'

    I'm signed up :smile:
  • WarriorReady
    WarriorReady Posts: 571 Member
    OP you nailed it! Thanks for a great post! :flowerforyou:
  • sun_fish
    sun_fish Posts: 864 Member
    Such a great post, thank you!
  • DamePiglet
    DamePiglet Posts: 3,730 Member
    This post inspired me. Thank you!
  • FitCowgirl8
    FitCowgirl8 Posts: 175 Member
    I too am the only woman in the free weights section at my gym. Great post! One a lot more women need to see!
  • KHalseth
    KHalseth Posts: 104 Member
    It was never a feeling of fear but a feeling of being out of place and someplace I wasn't wanted. I didn't let it bother me so much when I was 140 or 170 lbs. But once I was over 200 lbs I found the feeling even more pervasive. It didn't help that I had a pinched nerve and Plantar Fasciitis so I couldn't do a lot of things very well. And yes, when I used to use the free weight section overweight but not obese, I got a lot of comments on how my form was better than most peoples. Now days, I find more and more people leaving the huge weights on things I want to use and I can't remove them. It felt like a subtle way to say, we don't want you here, go away. It was as if all the really fit people who live in the freeweight section will only accept overweight or out of shape people up to a certain level. I ended up gravitating to the pool. Once I lose more weight and can move around better, I will go back.
  • ShoeGal78
    ShoeGal78 Posts: 35 Member
    I am also the only woman in the free weights area of my gym. I started by only going in there to pick up heavier dumbells but now I use the squat rack and the bench.. I do find it intimidating and frustrating at times.

    I am also the only person who does lower body exercises and get so annoyed when a guy uses the only squat rack for a good 40 mins to do bicep curls, bent over rows and shrugs...!!

    Anyway, nice to see I'm not alone!!
  • whizzlers
    whizzlers Posts: 101 Member
    Bump
  • truelove7
    truelove7 Posts: 79 Member
    Nailed it! I love being one of the only women in the free weights section of my gym. At first I was mortified and intimidated...but once I got a plan and walked in there full of confidence, I never looked back! Sure, I get looks of all kinds from men around me but, then again, I give lots of looks too! I've had so many guys actually tell me how cool it is to see a woman lifting heavy stuff. Great post, thank you!
  • This is true...love ur post!
  • harphy
    harphy Posts: 290 Member
    I am also the only woman in the free weights area of my gym. I started by only going in there to pick up heavier dumbells but now I use the squat rack and the bench.. I do find it intimidating and frustrating at times.

    I am also the only person who does lower body exercises and get so annoyed when a guy uses the only squat rack for a good 40 mins to do bicep curls, bent over rows and shrugs...!!

    Anyway, nice to see I'm not alone!!

    ^^ Same here. Probably same all over the world, lol. Guys work almost exclusively on the upper body and biceps. None of them does squats or barbell rows, deadlifts very rarely, they never use kettlebells either. Good new is that I have the squat rack all for myself.:blushing: If you see someone (over)using equipment you need just politely ask how long till the end of his set or workout. If they are normal they will understand. If not they may go and #$%& themselves.

    If there are really too many visitors at the gym I grab nearest kettlebell and do swings. This is a total body workout and my time is not wasted.
  • Cburton1123
    Cburton1123 Posts: 8 Member
    Love this post! I was completely intimidated at first, but I'm long over it. I'm at home in free weights. You can't get the results you want from just the cardio side, ladies. Go lift!
  • MoreBean13
    MoreBean13 Posts: 8,701 Member
    It was never a feeling of fear but a feeling of being out of place and someplace I wasn't wanted. I didn't let it bother me so much when I was 140 or 170 lbs. But once I was over 200 lbs I found the feeling even more pervasive. It didn't help that I had a pinched nerve and Plantar Fasciitis so I couldn't do a lot of things very well. And yes, when I used to use the free weight section overweight but not obese, I got a lot of comments on how my form was better than most peoples. Now days, I find more and more people leaving the huge weights on things I want to use and I can't remove them. It felt like a subtle way to say, we don't want you here, go away. It was as if all the really fit people who live in the freeweight section will only accept overweight or out of shape people up to a certain level. I ended up gravitating to the pool. Once I lose more weight and can move around better, I will go back.

    I'm very sorry you had this experience. It sounds like the people at your gym are quite rude. This is certainly not the norm for all gyms, and it might be worthwhile to gym-shop for a better place. I have a feeling that the people leaving weights racked was not intended as a personal diss towards you or any other overweight people, but rather just a rude and sloppy habit- but nonetheless it wasn't what you were looking for.

    At my gym, when I see a person who is a beginner or not-yet-fit person, I always give them a mental high-five for their efforts and hope they catch vibes of encouragement. I don't actually say or do anything because I don't want to make them feel singled out, but it's there.

    I think if you keep an open mind you might find a gym with a better, more welcoming environment (or at least not-discouraging environment).
  • Very well said! I am fairly the only woman in that section with many men. I was very intimidated at first and felt awkward, but soon got over it. Now I walk over there with confidence and a bit of a swagger lol. My biceps are what men are gawking at and I am very proud of them ;-)
  • fleetzz
    fleetzz Posts: 962 Member
    How do all of you handle being spotted?

    I was bench pressing just the olympic bar, did 5 reps, and on the 3rd set, couldn't lift the 3rd rep (yes, I am a wimp), had to wiggle out under it. I don't go with anybody and everybody was busy doing their own workout plus I didn't know anybody.

    I am sure I could have just rested the thing on my chest until my muscles recovered but I didn't.
  • MoreBean13
    MoreBean13 Posts: 8,701 Member
    How do all of you handle being spotted?

    I was bench pressing just the olympic bar, did 5 reps, and on the 3rd set, couldn't lift the 3rd rep (yes, I am a wimp), had to wiggle out under it. I don't go with anybody and everybody was busy doing their own workout plus I didn't know anybody.

    I am sure I could have just rested the thing on my chest until my muscles recovered but I didn't.

    Usually you can just ask anybody nearby in between sets to spot you for a quick set. I've never had anyone refuse or even act annoyed about it. Just glance around and see who's playing with their phones or just looking around between sets.

    It's not wimpy to fail on a bench set. It happens sooner or later to everybody. Knowing how to roll out under the bar is actually a good skill to have in your toolbelt, and it's better to learn without another 80 lbs on the bar!

    Alternately you can either:
    1) Not do the last rep where you think you might fail.
    2) Bench in a power rack so you can set the safety bars so you don't get pinned
    3) Leave the weight on the bar unclipped so you can dump it off in an emergency (though this is better in your home gym as most commercial gyms don't like flying plates)

    The best option is to just grab someone to help out.

    *sidenote- some spotters get all handsy with the bar and help you through several reps when you don't need it. Usually when I get a random spotter I'll just say something like "I'll let you know when I need help" and then most of the time they keep their hands off. Sometimes they still do it. You get what you pay for.