Women with non dieting husbands

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  • malena126
    malena126 Posts: 18 Member
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    I cook and my hubby eats it, or he doesn't. Same with the kiddo. I don't run a restaurant, eat what I put infront of you or get your own butt in the kitchen. That also said, my hubby goes to mcdonalds or burger king for a burger at least once a week since I also do not consume or cook red meat. I don't have self control, so if I cook a high calorie meal, even if its for someone else, I will eat it too.
  • UsaJewels05
    UsaJewels05 Posts: 229 Member
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    My husband is definitely not trying to lose weight. Is is actually about 30-40 lbs underweight! But he is very supportive and encourages me to stay on track with this new lifestyle (I do not call it a diet). He pretty much will eat what ever I make, but always try to find ways to make his favorite foods (pasta) more healthy. With lots of veggies, and whole wheat pasta. While he will eat just a bowl of pasta I will have one cup of pasta and a big salad with light dressing. Sometimes he will have his cravings for the bad stuff like pizza, and if he order I will have a slice or 2. I know that to maintain this lifestyle I will have to treat myself, but I am in the gym the next day working a bit harder than the day before. You just have to sit down and talk about what you really want and why you are trying to get healthy. My husband knows that I doing this for a long term goal of being more healthy for our family and living a longer life.
  • Luv2Smile55
    Luv2Smile55 Posts: 133 Member
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    This is a wonderful topic and I thank you for bringing it up. I live in a household with my husband and adult son. They both can eat whatever they like and never have to worry about weight. I, on the other hand have been overweight my entire life. It would be SO much easier to diet and eat healthier if the house was "diet friendly" meaning NO temptations for me. That is simply NEVER gonna happen. I try to remind myself that just because I have to watch what I eat and they don't, I have to do the best that I can. I love the one response about simply using a little "willpower." Ha Ha!!! I wish it was that easy. I wouldn't have fifty pounds to lose if simply using "a little willpower" were easy for me. All this being said, I fix healthy meals and try again each and every single day. The goodies they have in the house and all the sugary things they eat each and every single day are not going away so ... Try and Try again to "simply use a little willpower." :ohwell:
  • truetarot1988
    truetarot1988 Posts: 56 Member
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    We have 5 kids (4 still at home) Before I got serious, I hated making "usual meals". I always ended up either overeating or eating things I knew I shouldn't. For some reason, now that I'm on track -for real this time, I still make the meals as before, but if it's something that will send me over my calories or such, I just have a salad or tuna. Why it doesn't bother me, idk. But for the first time ever, I can watch them devour dinner and be perfectly content with what's on my plate. I think some of it is in the mind. Seriously, I can be satisfied that him and the kids are happy with their dinner, knowing that the change in my life is for ME, not them. I don't make them "suffer" along with me (in their eyes, I'm sure it's suffering) :) . I just try to keep everyone happy. When they're having something I love, (tonight is spaghetti, one of my faves) it gets a bit hard to control myself, so I always imagine myself this summer, being able to fit into some pretty sweet shorts, and I'll just eat my salad. Visuals help a lot more than I thought they would! :)
  • malena126
    malena126 Posts: 18 Member
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    That's awesome hes so supportive especially since he has a medical condition where you guys have to eat almost polar opposite. You healthy less calorie food, and he calorie rich foods. Does he eat a lot of avocados? Those are calorie and fat dense but the good kind. I know I would love to be able to eat avocados daily! lol
  • 2dogzrule
    2dogzrule Posts: 245 Member
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    It stinks and my husband is the same way. He gets tacos, pizza, candy and all the junk food he wants (Grrrr).

    Once you get in the habit of logging consistently, it gets easier. If you are exercising, think about it, do you really want to destroy all of your hard work? That said, we can't be perfect all the time, and I allow myself a cheat meal (not a whole day) 1-2 times per month. I do this particularly if I'm going to a restaurant, party, or having a food that I really want to enjoy (like sushi). I have not found that it causes an issue with weight gain and I accept what I choose to eat. If anything, I sometimes think that calorie spike is helpful in boosting my metabolism and allowing a treat every now and then keeps me from majorly derailing.

    There are healthy dishes you can make that feel like a treat too (my favorite is a serving size of pasta, loaded up with fresh sauteed veggies, like onions, peppers and mushrooms, combined with pasta sauce and a bit of parmesan cheese). It's a huge quantity of food but 500 calories or less.
  • butterfli7o
    butterfli7o Posts: 1,319 Member
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    I would never cook two meals, what a pain. Luckily, my husband eats whatever I make and is usually really good about getting on board with healthy food choices. I try to lead by example. :)

    If he chooses to have chocolate or Doritos or whatnot, or if I make him something a little extra with dinner ( garlic toast or potatoes, etc.) I just don't partake. It's not a big deal.
  • JJananii
    JJananii Posts: 30 Member
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    How do you women with husbands who refuse to diet stay strong. Yesterday I was making a meal for my husband like I used to before I started trying to lose weight. It was chicken with macaroni and cheese, cornbread, and mashed potatoes. I am leaving for a couple of days so I decided to make it for him. I thought I could resist, I was doing so good all day and when I finished cooking I devoured a lot of it.... No moderation here. Now today I feel so disappointed in myself and sick to my stomach. So women how do you still make things for your husband without eating it. And oh yeah my husband is one of those people who can eat mcdonalds everyday and never exercise and never gain a pound while I have gained 15.

    my husband is trying to gain weight while i am trying to lose some bodyfat... i eat the same as him just smaller portions and just dont eat the extras like garlic bread or pudding when he does... if you want to lose weight you just need to exercise a bit of will power...
    This, my husband works hard labor 12 hours 6days a week. He is also trying to add about 10 lbs to his frame. He needs 3500-4000cals daily and I only need 1800. I add extra butter to his potatoes, he gets extra sauce and his lunches are filled with high cal snacks. If I want I can ruin my deficit for the day by indulging in his snacks but I choose to stay true to my goals while also supporting my husband in his.

    Same here! We have different bodies and opposite goals- he has to eat as much as he does to fuel the intense work he does all day and try to gain a little weight. We usually eat the same things, but I weigh my portions out and stay within my calorie goals (most days- I'm not perfect).
  • CaitlinW19
    CaitlinW19 Posts: 431 Member
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    I only cook 1 meal. He isn't picky so he will eat anything I make (I'm lucky there) but, where I plan to have 1 serving with steamed veggies, he can help himself to 2 or whatever. I try a lot of recipes to try to find things that are healthy but still very flavorful so we are both happy. Come to think of it, I don't cook anything I don't plan to eat including cookies, biscuits, side dishes...if I won't be able to fit a little bit into my diet, I don't cook it.

    If you can't do this, maybe try slow cooker meals for him or something...that way you won't have to stand over the meal cooking it as it calls to you. I find planning my meals really helps too...I don't want to let things go to waste. So I buy everything on Saturday or Sunday for the whole week...that kind of locks me in to sticking to a plan.
  • heatherhart
    heatherhart Posts: 113 Member
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    ahhh my husband drives me crazy!!! He can eat all day whatever he wants and not gain anything. I try to buy healthier stuff and make him eat it too lol or while he is eating junk I find something healthy
  • morethanthis0
    morethanthis0 Posts: 260 Member
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    I make my boyfriend eat what I eat haha he usually just eats bigger portions than I do. I've also been making healthier alternatives of foods we like
  • Francl27
    Francl27 Posts: 26,371 Member
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    We cook healthy. If he wants something, I try to find a healthier version of it. Or I just have less. He typically gets dessert and snacks at night that I don't eat though.. I just learned to deal with it.
  • spikrgrl503
    spikrgrl503 Posts: 247 Member
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    My husband and I are the same height but he's got about 70 lbs on me. I am much more active so we actually eat almost the same amount. I would say that I eat about 1/4 to 1/3 less of the meals that we cook. I try to allocate most of my cals for dinner so I can eat (within reason) what I want and not be deprived. I also tend to give him more of the carbs and eat more of the veggies.
  • Soufre
    Soufre Posts: 236 Member
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    I either make a separate meal for myself or if we're eating the same thing, my portions are waaay smaller. One of the reasons why I gained weight was because I was trying to keep up with him and his portions. Whoops.
  • BekaHoog
    BekaHoog Posts: 10 Member
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    I was reading all the replies, but I got bored, I have a few techniques that have saved my life since my husband refuses to eat healthier:

    First, while you're cooking, chew gum (or eat a hard candy)! you can't try everything or eat mouthfulls while you're chewing gum (try mint or cinnamon) and also drink water everytime you feel like putting the spoon to your mouth while cooking. This will save you a TON of unnecessary calorie intake, lil by lil adds up to a lot!

    Second, when serving, measure your portions, you can have what he's having, in smaller portions. It also helps to use a smaller plate, we eat with our eyes first, so if you see a smaller plate full it will satisfy you more than a if you see a large plate half empty!

    Third, I always have fat free chicken broth or soup and eat a cup before you start eating, this will help in two ways, first it will make your stomach fuller, so by the time you get to the high calorie meal, you're already half full, hence, eat less.. and second, it will give him time to chew down more of his food so you don't have to sit and stare at him eating while you already finished your tiny plate. (One cup of homemade chicken broth only has around 30 calories! so it's basically guilt free)

    Fourth, eat smaller bites and take your time, remember you taste with your mouth/nose, NOT with your stomach!! so the longer you keep it in your mouth, savoring it, the better! you won't taste it when it goes down your throat and I'm pretty sure you like the flavor, not the fattening aspect of it! So take your time to enjoy your dish, put your fork down after every bite and taste each one, try to take as long as he does eating, because we're more likely to over eat if we're sitting at a table with someone who's still eating after we're done. Did you know it takes about 20 minutes for a stomach to let our brain know we're full? Taking your time also ensures you don't over eat by giving your stomach plenty of time to let your brain know that you're satisfied.

    AND FIFTH, if aaall else fails and you're still hungry, finish with a salad or a cup of steamed vegetables and a glass of water!

    These tips have avoided me a LOT of extra calories, I hope they help you too!! :-)
  • krm0789
    krm0789 Posts: 134 Member
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    We're struggling with this right now. I do the cooking, & he had a hard time when I went vegetarian in June, but was happy with (tolerated?) the carb-heavy meals. Now that I'm adding in more vegetables, less crap, we can't find a balance. I'm frustrated that he won't eat what I make, & he's frustrated that I'm making things he doesn't like - but when I ask for his help in meal planning, he either has no feedback or suggests meals with no nutritional value. I've suggested that he make some meat on his own to add, or even just buy frozen chicken to add to his portions, but he hasn't. Luckily I haven't budged on cooking healthy, either, so he's losing out more, but it's hard.
  • MityMax96
    MityMax96 Posts: 5,778 Member
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    Wrap his Big Mac in divorce papers. That'll straighten him up.

    Could I do the same??? :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:
  • MityMax96
    MityMax96 Posts: 5,778 Member
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    We're struggling with this right now. I do the cooking, & he had a hard time when I went vegetarian in June, but was happy with (tolerated?) the carb-heavy meals. Now that I'm adding in more vegetables, less crap, we can't find a balance. I'm frustrated that he won't eat what I make, & he's frustrated that I'm making things he doesn't like - but when I ask for his help in meal planning, he either has no feedback or suggests meals with no nutritional value. I've suggested that he make some meat on his own to add, or even just buy frozen chicken to add to his portions, but he hasn't. Luckily I haven't budged on cooking healthy, either, so he's losing out more, but it's hard.

    Not everyone is going to eat vegetarian and like it...
    I for one would not, I like my meat.....

    The important thing if weight loss is the goal, is making sure calories in, is less than what you use....calories out.

    And have him eat fruit and veggies to get some of the micronutrients.
  • CynthiaT60
    CynthiaT60 Posts: 1,280 Member
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    I don't strap a bag of Doritos to my mouth like a feedbag.
    OK, now I want Doritos. :grumble:

    I guess I'm lucky. Mine supports me and even weighs ingredients when he's cooking, so I can log it all accurately. :smile:
    Otherwise: he just gets to eat more than I do, and I have to live with that.
  • MityMax96
    MityMax96 Posts: 5,778 Member
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    One other thing I will note, in regards to women and their husbands....

    Weight loss and eating is a personal choice....you can't force it.
    You can make "healthier" foods...and he can eat it or make his own....

    But don't try to force things on him.....

    Would you be open to him forcing foods down your throat, and insinuating hey "you eat like crap, and you are a fat slob.....eat better and lose some weight".....

    Tell me that is not what you would be thinking if the guy were doing that......
    I know I got it when I tried doing that with my wife....so now I just STFU and eat what I like....she can eat whatever she wants.

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