My husband says he isn't attracted to skinny women

24

Replies

  • summertime_girl
    summertime_girl Posts: 3,945 Member
    Maybe he doesn't like skinny girls. I'm not particularly attracted to skinny guys. And I have no interest in being skinny myself. But he could be referring to Kate Moss skinny, and you could be thinking one of the girls showcased in She Squats, Bro. Those girls are in NO WAY fat, but they sure aren't skinny either.
  • msf74
    msf74 Posts: 3,498 Member
    I know this might be a bit of a radical idea but...

    do you think that some men marry women because they love them for the totality of who they are and are flexible when it comes to body size unless taken to extremes?
  • iAMaPhoenix
    iAMaPhoenix Posts: 1,038 Member
    All men are attracted to women...Period. Skinny, fat, one leg, three arms, eye in middle of head. boobs on her neck, bald headed, facial hair(maybe that is a little too far), but you get the point. While we may have our preference, we are attracted to anyone. That is all!
  • Amber82479
    Amber82479 Posts: 629 Member
    I think that if a person loves another, their size doesn't really matter. My husband has been anywhere from 150 - 190lbs. since we've been together the last 14 years and I've loved him at both ends of the spectrum. If you truly love someone, their size won't stop that love.
  • minimalistmom
    minimalistmom Posts: 137
    My husband was the same way. He even married me at my heaviest (260-270 lbs.), and he never complained when I dropped the weight hitting a size 12. He loves me for me, not for what I look like. I just had my 3rd c-section and even now, swollen and feeling crappy about myself and wanting to scratch my eyes out because I can't stand looking at myself, he still looks at me and says, "you'll fit your skinny clothes, just not right this minute. You had a baby and you don't shrink over night." So even though he likes chunky women, he doesn't care how skinny I am, as long as I'm happy with myself.
  • Orion782
    Orion782 Posts: 391
    Your husband is a "liar". All men are attracted to women...Period. Skinny, fat, one leg, three arms, eye in middle of head. boobs on her neck, bald headed, facial hair(maybe that is a little too far), but you get the point. While we may have our preference, we are attracted to anyone who has a natural frontal opening!!! That is all!

    Dunno about that one, brosef. I have "standards" too. They usually include more than just having a vag.:ohwell:
  • EHisCDN
    EHisCDN Posts: 480 Member
    Clearly he's going to leave you. Your best bet is to not change and in fact do whatever is needed to make your physical appearance more in line with what he desires.

    This actually made me LOL at my computer screen.
    I know this might be a bit of a radical idea but...

    do you think that some men marry women because they love them for the totality of who they are and are flexible when it comes to body size unless taken to extremes?
    This is what I like to think.
  • summertime_girl
    summertime_girl Posts: 3,945 Member
    Your husband is a "liar". All men are attracted to women...Period. Skinny, fat, one leg, three arms, eye in middle of head. boobs on her neck, bald headed, facial hair(maybe that is a little too far), but you get the point. While we may have our preference, we are attracted to anyone who has a natural frontal opening!!! That is all!

    I know a lot of guys who are not attracted to women. And I know guys who certainly have preferences beyond just what's between a girls' legs.
  • lbsNirvana
    lbsNirvana Posts: 18 Member
    Think there s a lot of middle ground between "thick' and skinny....so, just stop losing weight @ the point where he finds you less attractive....and its always easier to gain weight anyway :)
  • msf74
    msf74 Posts: 3,498 Member
    he doesn't care how skinny I am, as long as I'm happy with myself.

    I think sometimes the pressure people put on themselves to look a certain way and the anxiety that brings into a relationship hurts the relationship more than actually being a certain size.

    I say this quite honestly, and I suspect many men are the same, the size my wife is happiest at is the one I am happiest at because she is just...happy.
  • Holly_Roman_Empire
    Holly_Roman_Empire Posts: 4,440 Member
    So...what do YOU want?

    Yeah, this.

    And I'm seriously starting to think traditional vows need to include "for skinny or for fat."
  • Booksandbeaches
    Booksandbeaches Posts: 1,791 Member
    Your husband is a "liar". All men are attracted to women...Period. Skinny, fat, one leg, three arms, eye in middle of head. boobs on her neck, bald headed, facial hair(maybe that is a little too far), but you get the point. While we may have our preference, we are attracted to anyone who has a natural frontal opening!!! That is all!

    Wellll..some men are attracted only to other men! They're not attracted to women at all. :laugh:
  • in_the_stars
    in_the_stars Posts: 1,395 Member
    Lollz...
  • str8bowbabe
    str8bowbabe Posts: 712 Member
    I'm sure you've heard this before. You're a bigger girl an insecure about your weight. Your husband reassures you by saying, "Honey, I don't like the way thin girls look." A lot of people think that's just to make you feel better, but my husband has dated primarily larger women/girls with some meat on their bones, and he's an attractive guy, so it's not like he can't land a size 0 model.

    But what worries me is this: if I become skinny, and he's really not attracted to skinny women, what do I do? :(

    If he is your husband, then shouldn't you just be able to ask him?
  • Sherbog
    Sherbog Posts: 1,072 Member
    If I had to ask myself or my husband this question I would be questioning a lot more than my weight. Can't you just discuss this with him. His input might be more valuable than strangers on a message board. Truly just discuss it with him. What can it hurt.
  • EHisCDN
    EHisCDN Posts: 480 Member
    Your husband is a "liar". All men are attracted to women...Period. Skinny, fat, one leg, three arms, eye in middle of head. boobs on her neck, bald headed, facial hair(maybe that is a little too far), but you get the point. While we may have our preference, we are attracted to anyone who has a natural frontal opening!!! That is all!

    I know a lot of guys who are not attracted to women. And I know guys who certainly have preferences beyond just what's between a girls' legs.

    Yea that quote completely disregards the LGBTQA community and their desires and attractions. Not to mention that is demeaning to women to assume men are only interested in "a natural frontal opening" (and "natural" being what? Guess there's some transphobia in this post as well).

    Hopefully men are more complex and have preferences beyond what's between a girl's legs. Jeez.
  • lemur_lady
    lemur_lady Posts: 350 Member
    My partner said something similar. in fact when he sees bones he gags.

    Earlier though he did begrudgingly admit that my weightloss so far has accentuated my curves not diminished them, so hes pretty happy so far.

    If he loves you he will not care if you are skinny. Im hoping the same is true in my case!
  • beepaz
    beepaz Posts: 42 Member
    awesome. lol.
  • brewji
    brewji Posts: 752 Member
    I tell my girlfriend the same thing. She has curves, and I love them.

    I have also told her if she does lose / gain weight, that I love her for the way she feels in her skin. If losing/gaining weight makes her feel like the most amazing woman in the world, then all the power to her!

    She asked me about this particular topic, and told me she wasn't the most comfortable asking me about it. But the fact that she did showed me how strong she was. I suggest letting him know, because some of us guys can tell when there's gears turning in your brain.
  • summertime_girl
    summertime_girl Posts: 3,945 Member
    in fact when he sees bones he gags.

    That's not a nice comment at all.
  • seltzermint555
    seltzermint555 Posts: 10,740 Member
    he doesn't care how skinny I am, as long as I'm happy with myself.

    I think sometimes the pressure people put on themselves to look a certain way and the anxiety that brings into a relationship hurts the relationship more than actually being a certain size.

    I say this quite honestly, and I suspect many men are the same, the size my wife is happiest at is the one I am happiest at because she is just...happy.

    Srsly guys. This ^

    I have to admit though -- I know that my rather huge bum was a major attracting factor to my husband when we met. Even though he was/is very fit, he LIKES big hips and so forth. Genuinely. I am much smaller now that I've lost almost 80 lb since our first date...and I worry from time to time that his attraction has diminished in some tiny way due to that. I still have all of the same curves, they are just smaller, and I know my husband finds me attractive - he shows me AND tells me daily. Nothing's changed in that area and if anything he's MORE into me. But I understand the worry. Change can be scary even when it's positive change!

    Communicate with your mate!

    Gonna go ahead and admit though - if I get down to my goal "range" of about 165-180 lb and then decided to go much lower, let's say 140 on my 5'8" frame turned out to be a lot different than my usual hourglass shape and my husband was having issues feeling attracted to me...but my health was equally good at 160-ish...I might consider keeping a little bit of weight on. Just being HONEST and not saying everyone should feel similarly. Likewise, I LOVE his body right now at 215-220 and I would be happy with him at any weight and would love him at any weight but if he went down to like 170 and looked gaunt and I wasn't as attracted that would be a downer. HONESTLY.
  • 1PatientBear
    1PatientBear Posts: 2,089 Member
    Your husband is a "liar". All men are attracted to women...Period. Skinny, fat, one leg, three arms, eye in middle of head. boobs on her neck, bald headed, facial hair(maybe that is a little too far), but you get the point. While we may have our preference, we are attracted to anyone who has a natural frontal opening!!! That is all!

    Uh, no. I have standards. Pretty stringent ones. I need much more than a hole and a heartbeat. But, whatever floats your boat, chief.
  • maab_connor
    maab_connor Posts: 3,927 Member
    Your husband is a "liar". All men are attracted to women...Period. Skinny, fat, one leg, three arms, eye in middle of head. boobs on her neck, bald headed, facial hair(maybe that is a little too far), but you get the point. While we may have our preference, we are attracted to anyone who has a natural frontal opening!!! That is all!

    there is literally NO ONE who you are not insulting w/ this.

    1- not all men are sexually attracted to women
    2- those who are, have standards and preferences within the sex - and some of those even have to do with her BRAIN
    3- not everyone man really CARES if the "frontal opening" is natural or not.
    4- you've just made sure that no one who reads this will EVER have sex with you.
    5- women are NOT just the "frontal opening"
  • ElliottTN
    ElliottTN Posts: 1,614 Member
    Your husband is a "liar". All men are attracted to women...Period. Skinny, fat, one leg, three arms, eye in middle of head. boobs on her neck, bald headed, facial hair(maybe that is a little too far), but you get the point. While we may have our preference, we are attracted to anyone who has a natural frontal opening!!! That is all!

    Uh, no. I have standards. Pretty stringent ones. I need much more than a hole and a heartbeat. But, whatever floats your boat, chief.

    I agree with this guy. Not all frontal openings are created equal. You might think you've got a 10/10 until drop trouser time comes and all of a sudden your like "whoa...what be up with that."

    tumblr_kuz3b3bbXl1qzbatyo1_250.gif
  • Clint9913
    Clint9913 Posts: 15
    <snip>
    But what worries me is this: if I become skinny, and he's really not attracted to skinny women, what do I do? :(
    It's it that point you'd have to reevaluate y'alls relationship. For if he is opposed to you becoming a better you, you have bigger problems that if you loose 20+ lbs.
  • osothefinn
    osothefinn Posts: 163 Member
    All I know is this.

    Funny-memes-real-men-have-curves.jpg
  • in_the_stars
    in_the_stars Posts: 1,395 Member
    in fact when he sees bones he gags.

    That's not a nice comment at all.

    Agree.
  • 4homer
    4homer Posts: 457 Member
    Your husband is a "liar". All men are attracted to women...Period. Skinny, fat, one leg, three arms, eye in middle of head. boobs on her neck, bald headed, facial hair(maybe that is a little too far), but you get the point. While we may have our preference, we are attracted to anyone who has a natural frontal opening!!! That is all!
    actually im attracted to other men so not all men. Even straight or bi men have different taste then you. Sorry to burst your bubble hun
  • knra_grl
    knra_grl Posts: 1,566 Member
    He may not like "skinny" but perhaps he like "fit" - 2 different things a fit woman has curves and muscle definition and looks healthy and confident. A skinny woman may be so thin her bones stick out and there is no definition to her body - not butt, no boobs, no legs.

    He may just be sending out the signal that he doesn't want you to go to the extreme of becoming unhealthy.

    Or he is insecure and doesn't want to you to look too good.

    I think if he truly loves you he will love you for you not the packaging.
  • lemonsnowdrop
    lemonsnowdrop Posts: 1,298 Member
    Guys, I never said he wouldn't LOVE me if I became thinner. I know he will. But some guys are just physically attracted to curvier, thicker women, and that's not a lie. I just don't want his sexual attraction for me to wane because I lose weight.

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