Grrrrrr the jealous....ventage thread!

xDeannaGarciax

I makes me laugh, because i know there's something wrong with her mind. I think its envy.

WOW, I know EXACTLY how you feel! I feel your pain girl but I'm sure like myself, you have plenty of other family and friends who love and care about you, there's no reasoning with a crazy person, especially when it's a jealous or envious crazy person... trust me I know! You can't change them or their opinions of you, so why bother with them at all. Good for you for staying strong and healthy girl:flowerforyou:

xDeannaGarciax

Ah jealousy. This helps me when someone says something unfathomable...

Mother Teresa's Anyway Poem

People are often unreasonable, illogical and self centered;
Forgive them anyway.

If you are kind, people may accuse you of selfish, ulterior motives;
Be kind anyway.

If you are successful, you will win some false friends and some true enemies;
Succeed anyway.

If you are honest and frank, people may cheat you;
Be honest and frank anyway.

What you spend years building, someone could destroy overnight;
Build anyway.

If you find serenity and happiness, they may be jealous;
Be happy anyway.

The good you do today, people will often forget tomorrow;
Do good anyway.

Give the world the best you have, and it may never be enough;
Give the world the best you've got anyway.

You see, in the final analysis, it is between you and your God;
It was never between you and them anyway.


** I feel that we could add "If you lose weight, some people will be jealous and try to bring you down. Lose weight anyway" **

:-)

I that! Applies to me in soooo many more then 1 way! Thank you!!!!:flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou:

meagalayne

Ughh... Was visiting my best friend from Uni this past week. She and I have been good friends for 5+ years and we lived together for a few of them. She was always the skinny one (size 6-10) while I always struggled with my weight (around 190lbs/size 14). Now that I am down to approx 140lbs and a size 6-8 she jokingly accuses me of anorexia because I watch what I eat and count calories, and although she attempts to sound supportive you can see that it is just veiled disappointment and frustration in herself since she has put on weight over the last year. The entire trip I ate at least 4 times a day (small meals), and yet she continued to suggest that I looked "ridiculous" and she couldn't believe how skinny I am (I still have another 10lbs or so to lose, and lots of toning to do!). In the end I had to lecture her about the inappropriateness of her comments. Such a drag! I was really hoping she could be happy for me...

Awww that's a bummer. It seems to be hard for people who we have relationships like that with (unless you take the journey together like my best friend and I did) to be happy and supportive and they try to be...a$$e$ because their un-happy with themselves. Jealousy can create some monsters out of people I've witnessed it first hand with some ex family members who were close like friends. Makes them crazy yet obsessed with me and all I do now. Just be happy that you feel good and look Fabulous!! That's all I can do and I have the wonderful support of my husband my kids my family and my wonderful friends I know it's a bummer:flowerforyou:

No kidding! Sometimes I think everyone else is more obsessed with my weight than I am.... And I'm the one trying to do something about it! lol

benct6008

I really hate like at my work the skinny girls just eat and eat and eat. If I ate that much my rear end would be the size of a mack truck! Irritating that I have to watch and think about everything that I put in my mouth to lose weight to be their size, but they can eat like that, ugh.....

xDeannaGarciax

Ughh... Was visiting my best friend from Uni this past week. She and I have been good friends for 5+ years and we lived together for a few of them. She was always the skinny one (size 6-10) while I always struggled with my weight (around 190lbs/size 14). Now that I am down to approx 140lbs and a size 6-8 she jokingly accuses me of anorexia because I watch what I eat and count calories, and although she attempts to sound supportive you can see that it is just veiled disappointment and frustration in herself since she has put on weight over the last year. The entire trip I ate at least 4 times a day (small meals), and yet she continued to suggest that I looked "ridiculous" and she couldn't believe how skinny I am (I still have another 10lbs or so to lose, and lots of toning to do!). In the end I had to lecture her about the inappropriateness of her comments. Such a drag! I was really hoping she could be happy for me...

Awww that's a bummer. It seems to be hard for people who we have relationships like that with (unless you take the journey together like my best friend and I did) to be happy and supportive and they try to be...a$$e$ because their un-happy with themselves. Jealousy can create some monsters out of people I've witnessed it first hand with some ex family members who were close like friends. Makes them crazy yet obsessed with me and all I do now. Just be happy that you feel good and look Fabulous!! That's all I can do and I have the wonderful support of my husband my kids my family and my wonderful friends I know it's a bummer:flowerforyou:

No kidding! Sometimes I think everyone else is more obsessed with my weight than I am.... And I'm the one trying to do something about it! lol

I know right, it's stupid! Why don't they find something better to do...I dont know...like maybe work on getting themselves into shape.

KLaurean

My friends don't support me at all....They constantly eat out and now that I have changed my eating habits they aren't being very..... accommodating. If I turn down cake at a birthday party they mock me, if I bring an apple instead of eating fast food, they laugh at me.
Despite that, I am not going to let them sabotage my new lifestyle. This is important to me and if they can't understand or support that, then it's not my problem to deal with.

edorice

What gets me is when I tried to help a friend get moving and to change her eating and she did nothing. So, in her wedding dress last week she looked like whatever. Don't ask for help if you're not going to do *kitten*.

maree

Gosh I can relate to SO many of these stories! It's such a shame that so many people out there can be so crass and inconsiderate of others!

This past weekend I went camping with a large group of friends and usually we all go in on food together- stocking up on chips, hot dogs and cookies. And every time I come home I've felt terrible! So this time I opted out of doing the group meals (which alone, I heard an earful about) and made my own rationed, healthy meals with things like pistachios and fruit to munch on rather than chips. And I was constantly harassed about "why are you eating healthy on a camping trip?", "geez, you're making us all feel bad", etc. And I just wanted to say look.... maybe you're ok knowing tomorrow you are going to feel bloated and 10 lbs heavier but I don't want to. Why comment at all?!

Tarreemha77

I hate the whole skinny minny thing and the "when are you going to stop" and "aren't you done losing weight yet?" Umm I probably will never stop because once I go into maintenance mode I still have to watch what I eat and exercise. I think people think that those lines are complimentary or something. It would be nice to just hear "you look really good" or "you look healthy" but I think people are afraid that will backfire or something.

Aw Sarah, you do look really good. But your right I think some people are afraid to tell you that, why, I have no idea...it's really weird though.

And we have agreed, not just "another diet" lifestyle change:bigsmile:

Tarreemha77

I get those comments all of he time too and they suck. Today I didn't have to wear scrubs to the day job so I wore a v-neck sweater that was form fitting and a pair of skinny jeans by Kenneth Cole that are a bit big so I have to wear a belt when I wear them. 1 of the girls at my job looks at me and goes:" I liked you better when you were bigger." ( Now she has weight issues of her own mind you). I said well I didn't. I love my body the way it is NOW. You could see the rips in my stomach through my shirt actually. One of my co workers said yesterday:" You know I just have to commend you for doing such an excellent job on losing all of that extra weight. You did good. I smiled and thanked him. I told him that his thought was in the minority though. Then I had another male co-worker who had also recently lost like 30 lbs and who often trades fitness secrets with me tell me:" T I'm proud of you keep up the good work. He made my day with that comment. Then we spent about 5 minutes showing off our abs to eachother and laughing about what it took to get to that point and how hard we had to work.

I just wish that people understood that losing weight is NOT an easy thing and infact the older you get the harder it gets. And I wish that they would respect your choice weither they like or agree with it or not. It's hard enough to stick to a diet or a exercise plan without stepping out and getting rude comments and discouragment from others.

meagalayne

My friends don't support me at all....They constantly eat out and now that I have changed my eating habits they aren't being very..... accommodating. If I turn down cake at a birthday party they mock me, if I bring an apple instead of eating fast food, they laugh at me.
Despite that, I am not going to let them sabotage my new lifestyle. This is important to me and if they can't understand or support that, then it's not my problem to deal with.

Oh man... This is even worse than my friends! Nobody that's your friend would mock you for making healthy choices. Surely they are just projecting their disappointment in their own self for being less disciplined. Your eating habits should not have to accommodate their insecurities; you are not responsible for shouldering the guilt they feel for eating sh*tty food! Just remind yourself of that when they act like d*cks, and maybe consider either talking to them about how immature and childish their behaviour is or FIND NEW FRIENDS!!!

NotAllWhoWanderAreLost

My husband, while trying to compliment me on my weight loss, said that before, i was "chubby" and "pear shaped" (implying that now i am better looking) and i on one hand was happy for the notice but on the other was pissed that he was bad-mouthing ME! THe OLD me! So i said to him "hey! Thats still ME you are talking about! I am the same person! I am the sum total of everything that gotten me to this point!" I know i was overweight and sedentary but seriously, when people feel free to bad-mouth "the old you" because you are now more fit and thinner its just not right grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr .............. He back-tracked and said that i KNOW pears are his favorite fruit, right? (LOL!) --- sorry dude, not outta the doghouse quite yet! haha

dj_stevie_c

You know what you want.

Don't listen to anyone else.

Unless it's a qualified doctor or nutritionist saying that you're loosing too much/need to lose more/don't need to lose more then there is no reason for you to listen to anyone else. Listen to what is in your own head FIRST.

I guess I'm lucky. most of my friends know what I want and have been really supportive, there is always the odd one or two that don't want me to loose too much though and I dj so I'm always the life of the party

lina1131

What people say about my weight loss doesn't bother me one bit - good or bad. I continue to do what i'm doing and whoever likes it can like it and whoever doesn't can go fly a kite. :bigsmile:

Scorpiomom222

I've had people give me huge explanations of why they can't do what I've done. All of the reasons are out of their control and well, it's not that their lazy. First off, I never said anyone was lazy. Second, I work full-time, have two kids, and volunteer in my community. I don't have any more time than anyone else. The difference is that I've made me a priority. I don't expect anyone else to make themselves a priority. My fitness is not a threat to anyone. I just want to scream...People this is not about you!

Same here! And I used to use the exact same excuses. "my kids are too demanding" or " i can't get out of bed early enough to workout before the kids get up." NOT true! If you want it badly enough, you CAN do it! Being healthy isn't for people who want it or need it. It's for people who WORK it!

LLP1225

I hate it when people say "you look great for 30" or "you look great for having 2 kids". So if I wasn't thirty does that mean that I don't look so great? Since when are my kids an excuse to gain weight? I would just like to hear "you look great" or "wow I would have never guessed that you had kids".

xDeannaGarciax

My husband, while trying to compliment me on my weight loss, said that before, i was "chubby" and "pear shaped" (implying that now i am better looking) and i on one hand was happy for the notice but on the other was pissed that he was bad-mouthing ME! THe OLD me! So i said to him "hey! Thats still ME you are talking about! I am the same person! I am the sum total of everything that gotten me to this point!" I know i was overweight and sedentary but seriously, when people feel free to bad-mouth "the old you" because you are now more fit and thinner its just not right grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr .............. He back-tracked and said that i KNOW pears are his favorite fruit, right? (LOL!) --- sorry dude, not outta the doghouse quite yet! haha

His comment back is too funny. My husband would have said something like that to me too if I busted him, lol. You have a very great point.

Lyadeia

Heh, I've said it before on here but the people who say 'Oh you skinny minny'/'You don't need to lose any more weight'/'Don't get anorexic' make me so mad!

I hate that =__= I am not technically "overweight" but I am not at a healthy size/fitness level either. Just because I am good at hiding the pudge under fashionable clothes, does not mean I should eat cake every day!

OMG that is soooo ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

OK, I am 5'5" tall and weigh 143. This is "normal" and "average" according to most people and their dumb little scales. But, under my clothes which I purchase very carefully in order to hide that pudge that you mention, I have a 33 inch waist and the pooch hangs over my exercise shorts!!! I am around 24% body fat. BLAH!!! I want to have an athletic and lean body...I want to have a waist somewhere in the 20's, and I want to have 17% body fat which is the high level of female professional athletes (not body builders, cause they have less than that).

I get SO SICK of people whining about me not needing to lose weight. NO, I am NOT anorexic. I eat 1500 or more calories a day. I exercise hard 6 days a week to shed my body fat. I am never going to be complacent with being "average" cause I know what I want. When I am at 17% body fat, then you can tell me to stop losing fat. Until then, get over yourself!!!

meagalayne

Heh, I've said it before on here but the people who say 'Oh you skinny minny'/'You don't need to lose any more weight'/'Don't get anorexic' make me so mad!

I hate that =__= I am not technically "overweight" but I am not at a healthy size/fitness level either. Just because I am good at hiding the pudge under fashionable clothes, does not mean I should eat cake every day!

OMG that is soooo ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

OK, I am 5'5" tall and weigh 143. This is "normal" and "average" according to most people and their dumb little scales. But, under my clothes which I purchase very carefully in order to hide that pudge that you mention, I have a 33 inch waist and the pooch hangs over my exercise shorts!!! I am around 24% body fat. BLAH!!! I want to have an athletic and lean body...I want to have a waist somewhere in the 20's, and I want to have 17% body fat which is the high level of female professional athletes (not body builders, cause they have less than that).

I get SO SICK of people whining about me not needing to lose weight. NO, I am NOT anorexic. I eat 1500 or more calories a day. I exercise hard 6 days a week to shed my body fat. I am never going to be complacent with being "average" cause I know what I want. When I am at 17% body fat, then you can tell me to stop losing fat. Until then, get over yourself!!!

Ughhhhh SOOOO agree! I'm 5'7 and 142lbs but boy do I have some pudge. I'd love to have a stomach that I could wear a bikini in, or legs that actually look like runners legs! Is that too much to ask? :P hehe Getting there... People are just so concerned with themselves they can't see my horribly un-toned body. I regularly offer to get naked for them just to prove a point. That usually shuts the women up!

xDeannaGarciax

I regularly offer to get naked for them just to prove a point. That usually shuts the women up!

LOL, there ya go!!!! :laugh:

meagalayne

I regularly offer to get naked for them just to prove a point. That usually shuts the women up!

LOL, there ya go!!!! :laugh:

"You don't have any fat on you!" ... "Oh, I can show you... But it won't be pretty! *starts undressing*".... I usually don't make it much past the first few buttons hahaha

Scorpiomom222

I regularly offer to get naked for them just to prove a point. That usually shuts the women up!

LOL, there ya go!!!! :laugh:

"You don't have any fat on you!" ... "Oh, I can show you... But it won't be pretty! *starts undressing*".... I usually don't make it much past the first few buttons hahaha

Same here. LMAO I hear you aren't fat ALL the time!

xDeannaGarciax

I regularly offer to get naked for them just to prove a point. That usually shuts the women up!

LOL, there ya go!!!! :laugh:

"You don't have any fat on you!" ... "Oh, I can show you... But it won't be pretty! *starts undressing*".... I usually don't make it much past the first few buttons hahaha

I was wondering how that worked? LOL!

MaryAnne1

My husband, while trying to compliment me on my weight loss, said that before, i was "chubby" and "pear shaped" (implying that now i am better looking) and i on one hand was happy for the notice but on the other was pissed that he was bad-mouthing ME! THe OLD me! So i said to him "hey! Thats still ME you are talking about! I am the same person! I am the sum total of everything that gotten me to this point!" I know i was overweight and sedentary but seriously, when people feel free to bad-mouth "the old you" because you are now more fit and thinner its just not right grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr .............. He back-tracked and said that i KNOW pears are his favorite fruit, right? (LOL!) --- sorry dude, not outta the doghouse quite yet! haha

My boyfriend has recently done the same thing to me! I've lost 22 pounds in total now since May, taking me to a size 14 UK. My boobs are looking pert and i've lost the fat on my check and neck. My boyfriend recently said that he would come home from a night out rather than stay out round friends, because my boobs are great now and he wants to come home to them!?!?!? Did he not want to come home to me before??? GRRR