first weigh – in; shock & horror

snudgie

Well, this has been day one. Today I weighed myself for the first time in a long time. The magic number: 430.4 Lbs. Though at my heaviest before this particular weigh-in got close – 425, this is my absolute record high, and it's completely knocked me for six.

Not that I have a right to be surprised, as I've spent the last couple of months on the sofa, watching TV, reading, and scoffing like a pig. I tell myself I cannot exercise or do small basic things around the house because my legs and my back hurt all the time. I am allowing my very patient wife to wait on me hand and foot, and I know it's unfair.

At some point I felt that I had to do something. I felt that I was getting too big, I noticed that I am more out of breath than ever, and I feel the sleep apnoea getting worse and worse. I am worried that it is already too late and that I should just wait for the inevitable. But I am not ready for the big sleep

My worst nightmare is leaving my wife a widow. I have to do something but it's a battle between two very unevenly matched sides: on side a we have my desire to live and to feel better, whereas on side B we have pain, inertia, a not inconsiderable dose of agoraphobia (keeping me from going outdoors) and the sheer terror of how bloody much work this is going to be.

But reading 430 on the scales probably did one good thing – it gave me a panic attack and enough willpower to resist a late-night munch. I will make an effort to go out for a walk tomorrow, phobias be dammed. I am not sure if this is suitable for the message boards, or if I am just whining to myself. I will copy this to my blog as well but I would be grateful for any remarks, positive or not. Be mean or harsh if you think it'll help.

good night from a terrified Humpty Dumpty lookalike

meritage4

weighing in and confronting that is the first step.
Perhaps your wife will walk with you?

CarolinkaCjj

You made the first step. I would also touch base with a dr - someone you trust to make sure you are okay to start exercising. I would also say that checking out the success stories - they are very inspirational and motivating. Start with small steps - follow the guidelines, start moving. Move indoors if you do not want to go out. Get yourself a food scale - weight and measure everything to help learn portion control. Someone else will surely post the guide to sexy pants - read it! There is no quick answers but you will make progress. It is a long term process but you can do it!

knra_grl

You can do this - the first step is deciding to do something about the problem and now you have to make a lifestyle change.

Baby steps - the first thing will be to make sure you keep track of your foods and weigh and measure everthing - you will get used to this after a bit of time and it won't seem like a big deal. As far as exercise you just need to move - you don't need to overwhelm yourself - if you have to do as suggested and start moving indoors - make a point of making sure you get up and walk from one room to the next - when you are comfortable go out and walk (if you are worried about other people's opinions don't - first it's none of their damn business and second you are making the changes you need to make) If you can only walk down the street two houses up start there - it doesn't matter - soon enough you will feel the progress! Good luck with your journey and don't be afraid to ask for help!

Also you are blessed with a wife who loves you no matter what - I am sure she will be there for you during this challenge!

will2lose72

Yea for stepping out of your comfort zone, logging in, and putting it out there! Have a great walk tomorrow. Set some smaller goals so that you are not as overwhelmed. You are worth fighting for!

wannakimmy

Yea for stepping out of your comfort zone, logging in, and putting it out there! Have a great walk tomorrow. Set some smaller goals so that you are not as overwhelmed. You are worth fighting for!

This^^^
Difficult at first, but you can do it!

ndj1979

you got this man..!

Here is what I would suggest…

Create a 500 per day calorie deficit …either through MFP or using TDEE method. Since you are new MFP Method might be easier to understand. Just set MFP to one pound per week loss and start logging your food and make sure that you NET the number that MFP gives you…so if MFP gives you 2000 calories a day and you enter walking 1 mile and get a burn of 100 calories then you should eat 2100 calories less the 100 burned = 2000 net.

Get a food scale. Seriously, get one. Do not rely on eye balling, measuring cups etc, this is an easy way to overestimate calories and think you are eating less when you are really not.

Make sure you log/weigh/measure/everything that goes into your mouth.

Do NOT restrict any foods. Sugar, carbs, bread, etc, etc are not bad for you …overeating is what made you put on weight. I follow the 80/20 rule 80% healthy and 20% whatever you want = pizza, ice cream, cookies, cake etc. Now, if you have trigger foods that make you binge, you should not keep them in the house until you learn some moderation …

Work out/move more…at first this might be a walk around the block; then a two mile walk, three mile walk, etc; then maybe some slow jogging and then maybe some strength training. Eventually, you are going to want to do some heavy lifting. I would recommend picking up a copy of starting strength and or new rules of lifting ….and then build a program around compound movements = deadlifts, barbell squats, rows, overhead press, pull ups, chin ups, and bench press….

Remember, you did not get fat overnight and you are not going to get fit overnight. It is a marathon not a sprint…

good luck to you ….

TobieGirl

You can do this! You have already taken the first two steps. First, you have admitted you need to do something and second you resisted a late night snack. You are on the first steps of your journey.

Try to do little things each day. Perhaps walking a few houses and resisting a snack or two. Then walking further or stretching. Perhaps switch a highly processed snack for a piece of fruit or handful of nuts.

Good luck and we will all be here to encourage you on this journey towards a healthier you!

DamePiglet

Hi OP!
Congratulations on your first step!
I did a quick search of the forums to find some posts that might give you a bit of inspiration...

http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/1160837-from-420-2-pounds-to-219-6-pounds-picture


http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/1103266-7-years-of-marrage-and-135-pounds-gone

And that was just in the first couple of pages of searching!
They did it and SO CAN YOU!!!!
You AREN'T alone and you don't have to be afraid. You can choose to get healthy and I sincerely hope you do.
And yeah, I think you should start by seeing your doctor.

Mygsds

When I read your story the first thing that came to mind I see you are so worth this battle. Sometimes we(me included) think o f all of the things we are going to give up. Well. Think of all you will gain... Better health, feeling better, and more years to spend with your deserving wife. Don't give up .. I remember something I read.. Nothing tastes as good as looking good feels. Keep us posted..

FindingAmy77

hey we all had that horrible huge number. I felt the same way. I was in denial for so long acting like my clothes all shrunk and not facing the fact that I just kept getting bigger. THen I stepped on the scale and almost had a panic attack. You took the first step and that was confronting the facts and the scale., Take this one day at a time. Make small changes. be more active. get up in between comercials and walk in place. make a better choice of what you eat each time so its an accomplishment and not something to be guilty about. Take baby steps every single day and you can do this. Totally rooting for you.

PippiNe

I know there is a guy who has posted his success story on here who has dropped 300 lbs (starting at 500+ lbs). This is the perfect place for you to be. Take small steps, set realistic goals, achieve them and set new ones. You can do this and it may not be as much work as you think. I found losing weight with fitness pal to be very easy compared to the ways I used to try to lose weight. Eating sensibly in smaller portions and just doing 20-30 minutes of exercise each day is all it took to drop about 1-2 lbs each week. Take it one day at a time and don't worry about the road ahead. We'll be here along the way for encouragement ) Enjoy your walk tomorrow!

psmd

GOOD FOR YOU! You're absolutely doing the right thing, good luck to you!!

tam6van

Yay for taking the first step! MFP is a great place to be. It will offer you lots of support. We're here for you

Papillon22

Everyone has already said what I was going to say, so I'll just add my YOU CAN DO IT!
You've already started, just keep going

Graelwyn75

Well done for getting yourself on here and for being so wonderfully honest in your post here.
Now, my question is this... will you be one of those who joins, gets started, plunges in headfirst, then disappears again, or will you be one of those amazing success stories that turn up a year or two later on this site ?

The key is in making this a lifestyle change, and not just a 'diet'. The key is long term, not short term. The key is accepting this will take time, maybe several years, and in making small changes a bit at a time, so that you are not so overwhelmed and disheartened that you give up. This is your life you are trying to save, and only you can do it, though hopefully with a good amount of support along the way.

I know you can do this...but do you know you can do this ?
Feel free to add me.
I am not overweight, but I am a good supporter and encourager, and I will speak up if I see things I think can be improved upon.

auntiemsgr8

Everyone has great input here. I totally agree with ndj1979.

You are very lucky to have such a wonderful wife. I am going to guess that she does all the shopping and cooking. Have you shared with her your desire to regain your health? work together to find some healthy recipes and meal ideas and plan them together. Yes, you have to do the hard work but it can definitely be a team effort in some ways. And ask her not to purchase anything the two of you do not agree upon having in the house.

I started over 300 pounds and like many I do not deny myself anything. That is a big key to my success. If you have favorite foods that are not high on the healthy list still eat them as ndj1979 said.

And make sure you eat enough. You need to fuel your body for the changes it is about to go through.

As far as exercise, start small. People say losing weight is more diet than exercise. Start with walks and add on once you feel you have a handle on that and your nutrition.

Lastly, don't say you are on a 'diet'. Those have an end. What you are doing is a lifelong process change.

Best of luck to you.

Tabbycat54

(((Hugs))) That moment hits all of us in one way or another! Remember that we're here for you and get it done I highly recommend the success stories because then you can see ordinary people do extraordinary things when it comes to weight. You've got this!

lwestmill

You will learn to eat less and be ok with it. Its better to do it this way and not have to go thru surgery. Sometimes that leaves you worse and dependent. Definitely a man can not live on straight liquids for weeks at a time or eat 600-900 calories a day.

YOU can do this! It was an awaking for most of us on the site to know how much we were actually eating! I can say it was a shock to me! Everyday, I'm amazed that the folks on here are dropping pounds and actually showing pictures of their success. Look at their pics and they will inspire you.

Caution though. Learn to try to eat healthy so when you do loose and have to drop down more calories, it will be easier for you to do. Calories are calories. You can eat a Big Mac and fries at lunch but wouldn't you want to have more food all day than a fast food that will leave you hungry later? Try to split up your calories thru out the day. For example: I can eat 1,200 calories a day. I have 300 for breakfast, 300 for lunch and 600 for a bigger supper when I can eat regular with the rest of the family.

About the exercise, I started learning the diet for the first week. Its a huge change, counting calories. Then with a friend, (ie: maybe your wife) I started out with a small time limit to work out. I have been adding more time as I go. I'm up to 40 minutes a day every other day.

I wish you all the good luck!

kimosabe1

Just start logging your food & getting exercise. You can do this! Do this for yourself!!

Buff2022

I would like to follow your story on your blog. If you don't want to share publicly will you send me a message please.