Who made you become overweight?

Hannahp1402

I obviously know that ultimately I put the food in my mouth. So obviously me

But do you think that your childhood homelife and parents contribute to you being overweight as you get older? Like when you see a fat child ? Or parents who aren't educated in what and how to cook?

Or maybe partners who eat badly? Or do you just think its all your fault for eating too much?

Just curious:)

zyxst

Me.

BekaBooluvsu

My mom was fat so I thought being fat was how I was supposed to be. Obviously now I know better. Now, I want my kids to think the same about me but only as being healthy.

poedunk65

My mother always told me to join the army so I would come out looking like an Adonis. I finally told he when I was like 35 or 40 to accept for who I am, that's when I decided, along with my doctor lol, to get healthy.

Inshape13

I would have to say Me. No one forced me to eat crap and not exercise. That being said, I had a lot of trauma in my life that I never dealt with and food was a way to deal with anxiety and stress. I think that if I had the emotional foundation from an early age to deal with things I would have been better off, but once I was an adult...I could not use that as an excuse. I am huge into personal responsibility.

Phrick

I did it. Sure I didn't have the greatest examples in my life, and sure I had some health and medication issues that contributed a "likelihood of weight gain," but that doesn't excuse me shoveling food in my gob. I wouldn't have become morbidly obese if I had controlled my intake all along.

lemonsnowdrop

My dad abused drugs when I was a child, so I turned to food to compensate emotionally. That was almost ten years ago, though, so the problem lies within me and I can't blame anyone else for my weight.

SezxyStef

really....

as a child if your parents allow you to eat whatever, whenever they have to take some responsibilty for that but once you can make the choices yourself...then no it's all you...

My mom was a great cook and we were poor so I was a slim child...continued to be slim until I could make my own choices then I got fat...and stayed fat...

That is all on me...

As for your partners...unless they are force feeding you it's still on you...

Trying to blame others for your choices is not taking responsibility for your own behaviour..which is imho childish...

Jestinia

I was a sugar junkie ever since I can remember. Since I'm an atheist I guess I can't blame malicious gods, so I'll go with genetics. But I could have fought it harder and for awhile there I embraced it instead.

nespinosa3

People around me always made comments that made me insecure every time I gained as few as 3-4 pounds. I was never fat, but I am not skinny either. So everyone "made sure" I didn't get fat by pointing every single time that I didn't look "perfect". Probably the most that got to me were the comments from my ex, who apparently would not want to be with me if I didn't look like a model. This made spend years living on very restricted diets, but then binge as soon as I took a "cheat day". That's what made me gain weight, the yo-yo dieting because I just didn't know how to live healthily and happy. I thought I had to starve myself, and then I just lost control as soon as I started eating out.
I know ultimately the food was put in my mouth by me, but yes, people can definitely influence a lot over these decisions.

joolywooly33

ME!

HopeNShelton

I have always struggled with weight issues although I never realized I had a problem until I was 14 and a freshman in high school. Growing up the rule in my home was eat what was placed in front of us or go hungry. My mom had no clue what portion control was. If it covered the entire plate in a heap then it was good. My mom believed in putting lard/shortening in everything she cooked (gross). But knowing that dinner was the only meal we got a day we ate. Once I was in high school and I weighed 150lbs and some boy told me I had a huge butt I decided to take control and I stopped eating and started walking. But I did it wrong. I starved myself for 3 months, went from a size 14 to a size 7 and maintained it until I was 18 and got pregnant with my first child. I gained 80lbs and with each pregnancy I gained about 20 lbs less.

Im not really sure if I blame me or my homelife growing up but I blame health problems like my stroke that I had 7 yrs ago that finally got me to my biggest ever at 337lbs. I am currently down 112lbs since surgery in November. It wasnt easy and its not a quick fix. I went through a 2 yr process and I am mentally stable to make the lifelong changes that the surgery requires. Without that then you put your body and yourself through it for nothing because if you are not 100% committed you will lose but you will gain it all back and probably more.

If anyone is looking for friends, feel free to add me.

mumblemagic

Ultimately eating is my decision, but I think some of the ingrained habits that led to me overeating came from my parents:
- My mum & nan had a staunch post-war "starving children in africa" policy on food which I have picked up and makes me feel very guilty when I waste food on my plate. I actually went to South Africa recently, and my boyf pointed out that yes, starving children in africa would be very glad of that food, so don't finish all your food so the cleaning lady can have some!
- My mum is a real stress eater as am I. I now stress eat grapes and cherry tomatoes, but it used to be chocolate and my boyfriend was very good at enabling me to eat lots of chocolate. It makes me happy and he likes to make me happy!
- When we were busy, my parents would order takeaway, and I continued this habit when I am busy or can't be bothered to cook
- Neither of my parents were particularly sporty, and both feel that gym membership is a waste of money.

Other factors:
- I have had problems with my blood sugar (non-diabetic hypoglycaemia) since I was a baby. This leads me to crave sweet foods, and if I'm not careful can put me in a binge/crash cycle. This was worst when I was growing as a teenager (3 inches one year!), and I had to eat loads of food. Veggies just weren't enough to satisfy; it had to be meaty or carby. and extra-high calorie.
- I have hyper-extending tendons leading to injuries in sports, and pain when doing some exercises.
- Hatred of the locker rooms and PE at school gave me a massively anti-sport feeling. Now that I've realised it's not sport I don't like, it's PE, I've sorted this one out. I actually love fencing!
- I had ME when I was a teenager. When it's all you can do to get out of bed in the morning and brush your teeth, healthy eating habits and exercise are the last thing on your mind.
-I have asthma which makes outdoor exercise really difficult, although I can now run ok even in the cold, now my lungs are used to it.

So ultimately, a bit of other people, but mainly me. Some of the psychological stuff I am now aware of and am trying to condition myself against, and I'm learning to work around the physical issues.

velvet_violence

This will probably sound a little blamey but my mom in fact did make me eat crap and not exercise. There was nothing else to eat (I once put up a big stink about it) and she didn't like movement as it "made her nervous". Unfortunately my stepmom considers herself "naturally thin" and while she is active and healthy it does come to her without working on it so much. Great inspiration but useless for advice. My father used to be a candy bar and ice cream dude but he has been very strict with his diet lately and treadmills for an hour each day.

Add this to a huge amount of trauma, and well, let's just say while I blame myself for the state I am in now I vividly remember when I first learned to depend on food and it wouldn't have been my first choice if I had access to ways of expressing myself that didn't add weight. To be honest it still grates that no one was able or willing to provide that for me, though they did give me lots of junk food. Been in therapy for a year and a half now and am getting down to weights I haven't seen in several years, happily.

lthames0810

Of course, at the age of 59, I've spent far more of my life on my own than with my parents, so it's all on me.

However, there are some cultural backgrounds that seem to lend themselves to people being heavy. In my case, some degree of over weight was not only tolerated, but desired in women. As a skinny child, my father always encouraged me to take second helpings of dinner. Later as an adult I figured out that his notions of female beauty were not quite fashionable, but as long as he lived he thought I should put on more weight even when I was at my heaviest.

missjones513

I think my mom being a single parent and working nights contributed. I became less active because my sister and I couldn't go outside and play while she was sleep. I wasn't too involved in school activities because I wouldn't have a way home. I'm also an introvert so I would watch tv or get on the computer when I wasn't at school.

I ate a lot and sometimes just out of boredom. I knew nothing about calories or how to lose weight.

Timelordlady85

It was me who put all the food into my mouth but it would have been nice if my parents would have been better educated on foods and cooked more whole grain pastas and encouraged us to exercise more. I'm teaching my children young about nutrition and exercise and being healthy.

Blossomforth13

It was definitely my fault, and my overextended brain.

That said, there were things that contributed to it, like my mother constantly dieting on and off, and binging when she got upset, so when I lost her at age seven, I thought that was how it was supposed to work. My family puts a huge emphasis on food and food being a way to care for people, make people feel better.

When I hit 10, I had this need to control everything, to not need anyone or anything. This started a spiral of eating unhealthily at home, skipping meals and selling my lunch off at school, becoming obsessed with everything that went into my body. I never hit the diagnostic BMI, but I had (have) eating disorder behaviors up the wazoo.

Then to try an recover, I put on weight and ballooned out, making myself feel worse, and cordially hating myself for years.

NessaR2011

At a very early age I went through more than most have in their lifetime. I turned to food for comfort because it was available. It took until I was almost 30 to get away from the things that had tortured me since childhood. My weight and emotional eating habits seemed to be the last thing to tackle for me to be healthy as a whole. So yes, it is my own fault for being as large as I was but so many other factoring circumstances assisted in that. I can post my profile "About Me" which has it in detail but I'll spare you the novel.

aliceclutz90

Me. I was a fat pig and only I shovelled all that food in my gob

Tracey_B_72

All me I ate the food but I also took pregnancy as eating for 2 add the gain up 3x I weighed an extra 6st, I did lose 1/2 of it very slowly over 13 years then a year and a 1/2 ago decide to lose the last 3.
So I may have gained it but then I took control of it and I lost it.

WBB55

By the time I was 11 or 12, I was pretty much making my own food choices. I was never forced to eat things I didn't like, and my mom was more than happy to let me make my own food, since that meant less work for her. I had jobs by the time I was 15, so I could buy different foods and bring them home on my bike if I wanted to. I think my weight in adolescence had more to do with not exercising, though. Again, can only blame myself for that, though. My parents didn't say "you can't go out and play." So I don't see how it's their fault.

Now, could my mom have taught me a good relationship with food? Could my mom have set a good example by exercising herself? Sure. But I don't blame anyone but myself.

mpjmmp

I'm going to blame it on an injury in the military. Several surgeries, immobility, steroids, pain meds (= munchies) and being unhappy because of hurting all the time (several years – still in rehab), that threw me into a “comfort food” lifestyle so I guess I recognize it actually boils down to my food choices that brought on so much weight….. oh, how I wish I could do it all over again - however, definitely had a life event that started the train going downhill.

I'm also interested in finding friends here on MFP. I'm three weeks in and have 50 to go. Friend me if you like.

chelstakencharge

I take FULL responsibility

TwirleySlims

I was just fine till I gave up Smoking & then boom! weight gain was rapid! So in answer to your question, ME

Lestrange__

Me and my horrible life choices.
My mother didn't really help either.

ironanimal

All me, though steroids for asthma didn't help. I gained more after I was taken off of them, through ceasing regular exercise and discovering the wonders of alcohol.

SezxyStef

I'm going to blame it on an injury in the military. Several surgeries, immobility, steroids, pain meds (= munchies) and being unhappy because of hurting all the time (several years – still in rehab), that threw me into a “comfort food” lifestyle so I guess I recognize it actually boils down to my food choices that brought on so much weight….. oh, how I wish I could do it all over again - however, definitely had a life event that started the train going downhill.

I'm also interested in finding friends here on MFP. I'm three weeks in and have 50 to go. Friend me if you like.

There are ex military here..me included..and I could blame them too...when I got pregnant (20 years ago) they no longer allowed me to workout the way I had been...I couldn't even "legally" lift my helmet...so I didn't workout at all...that was my choice...

I gained a lot of weight through out my last trimester....ate everything, didn't even go for walks...left the military with "bad knees" and extra 40lbs and kept that weight on based on my choices...

morf13

I blame my Mom...just joking,I put the weight on thru bad eating habits & no exercise, but seriously, I did get my Mom's metabolism. She used to be very thin into her mid 20's, and suddenly, she started gaining weight, and battled weight issues ever since. I was the same, I hit about 25, and then started to gain,and have gained ever since. I alos got married at 25, got a bit lazy, stopped working out, but overall, although most is my fault,inherting Mom's metabolism did not help, and I gain weight in the same places as her, mostly my butt,thighs, etc which is a weird place for a guy to gain the bulk of weight.

MB_Positif

There will always be some outside influence to blame it on.

I choose to blame it on myself and all the sorry excuses I made.

cchew686

I blame myself, not only for getting to where I am, but also for putting myself in situations that cause me to overeat. For example, my BF can eat...a lot. And the demented part of my brain says "you can eat the same way he does." No, brain, no. I don't blame my parents, but they do have some messed up eating habits. My Mom sometimes seems like she blames herself though. She'll say things like, "I wish I put more of an emphasis on appearance when you kids were growing up." My brother and I are both heavy, but he is in his early thirties and I am 27, so I really wish she would stop blaming herself. We are grown adults now and we are both improving, so things are looking up.