are looks important to you?

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  • jennifer_417
    jennifer_417 Posts: 12,344 Member
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    Flash forward 2 years and about 40 pounds of weight loss. I wound up reconnecting with that guy. Guess what? Now we are together. I have been head over heels in love with him for over 2 years. I asked him what was so off putting about me before. His response? "I always knew you were the one. You were just too big." Brutally honest. I went from being too fat for him once and now he tells me I am the love of his life.

    IN

    Before "OMG WHAT DOUCHE"


    Hahaha! There is a fine line. It's understandable if a guy simply doesn't find you attractive because of your size...but when he treats you badly or even...differently?...because of it...that's a different story. (Not saying that's what happened, just my observation on the matter.)
  • devil_in_a_blue_dress
    devil_in_a_blue_dress Posts: 5,214 Member
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    Attraction is important to me, but I am also attracted to a wide variety traits and features.
  • MsSophySticated
    MsSophySticated Posts: 181 Member
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    Nope. I know what that's like to have someone judge you from the outside appearance and it sucks. Also with time, the outside changes as you get older, and the inside will be what really matters after all. That's what I focus on, to me someone who is kind etc... will be the most beautiful person in my eyes whether they are ugly to some. Which means that the guy who I will be attracted to in all ways will be because of his inside values and not because of his looks. He'll radiate far more because of the values and not because of something he was born with. That's my opinion though :smile:
    I think that was very well put

    Just speaking from experiences and being honest :smile: Taking the time to get to know someone really does wonders. If you focus on the looks, you can't let that person have a chance into showing you how they really are and you guys could get along so well too! Take your time and listen, before judging! :happy:
  • Alatariel75
    Alatariel75 Posts: 17,959 Member
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    I think being physically attracted to your partner is incredibly important, but I don't think traditional "good looks" are a necessity for physical attraction. There are many things that make someone physically attractive and what is attractive to me may not be attractive to you, and what I find attractive in one person, I would not necessarily find attractive in another person.

    What makes someone physically attractive varies wildly from person to person, changes over time, changes with the way you think about that person and is basically impossible to really quantify.

    Would someone have to be drop dead gorgeous before I'd date them? No (though luckily my husband is a total hottie) but would I need to be physically attracted to them? Yes. But it isn't necessarily their looks that makes them physically attractive.
  • BinaryPulsar
    BinaryPulsar Posts: 8,927 Member
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    I guess I'm weird. I'm attracted to good conversation -shrug- LOL

    Me too! It is the most attractive aspect to me. The conversations I have with my husband, I just fall deeper and deeper in love with him (for these past 18 years). He also has a fit body (just athletic), and a sweet face and eyes. And he is so insightful and kind. He's intelligent. And so funny. Good in bed, too. Adventurous.
  • establishingaplace
    establishingaplace Posts: 301 Member
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    Of course looks are important. Sure, there are a lot of things that create attraction - smell, mannerisms, personality - but that person is going to be the first person you see when you wake up so you really ought to enjoy looking at them.
  • MysteriousMerlin
    MysteriousMerlin Posts: 2,270 Member
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    Are they important? Yes.
    Are they the most important? No.

    Quite.
  • funforsports
    funforsports Posts: 2,656 Member
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    Yes......
  • Strokingdiction
    Strokingdiction Posts: 1,164 Member
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    Nope. I've never been attracted to a person's looks. It's not a lack of shallowness thing either, I literally don't feel any sort of sexual attraction to people I don't know. In fact, I don't feel any attraction to a person until I know that they feel some sort of attraction to me. I never understood girls having crushes on celebrities/models.

    But once a potential partner makes a move and I already liked them in a friendly manner, it's on.
  • 1pandabear
    1pandabear Posts: 336 Member
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    Nope. I know what that's like to have someone judge you from the outside appearance and it sucks. Also with time, the outside changes as you get older, and the inside will be what really matters after all. That's what I focus on, to me someone who is kind etc... will be the most beautiful person in my eyes whether they are ugly to some. Which means that the guy who I will be attracted to in all ways will be because of his inside values and not because of his looks. He'll radiate far more because of the values and not because of something he was born with. That's my opinion though :smile:
    Just wanted to quote this post because it is so sweet. :drinker:
  • Mr_Bad_Example
    Mr_Bad_Example Posts: 2,403 Member
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    Yes, looks are important to me. Here is my favorite look.

    1378215793278.jpg
  • thatonegirlwiththestuff
    thatonegirlwiththestuff Posts: 1,171 Member
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    I am shallow as a puddle, so hell YES...kidding. Physical attraction is the first thing that (typically) that draws me to someone. But that ends quickly. If he's not intelligent, lacks humor, or is unkind, those things are deal breakers. Looks are just gravy.
  • Sinisterly
    Sinisterly Posts: 10,913 Member
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    I guess I'm weird. I'm attracted to good conversation -shrug- LOL

    Me too! It is the most attractive aspect to me. The conversations I have with my husband, I just fall deeper and deeper in love with him (for these past 18 years). He also has a fit body (just athletic), and a sweet face and eyes. And he is so insightful and kind. He's intelligent. And so funny. Good in bed, too. Adventurous.
    Lol oh mama, that was descriptive! Sounds like you two were defo meant for each other!! I'm so happy you found someone that arouses your intellects as well as your loins! (Bahaha, see if you can figure out what movie that's from).

    :flowerforyou:
  • Sbrn_
    Sbrn_ Posts: 351 Member
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    For me there needs to be an equal degree of both physical attraction and enjoyment of one-another's company/similar interests. If it's all one and too little of the other the relationship won't last very long. If you don't find your partner at all physically attractive then you'd be better off just staying friends, because sooner or later you'll get bored. If you don't care at all for your partner's personality then you'll also get bored. There needs to be the right mixture of both.
  • ValerieMartini2Olives
    ValerieMartini2Olives Posts: 3,024 Member
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    Flash forward 2 years and about 40 pounds of weight loss. I wound up reconnecting with that guy. Guess what? Now we are together. I have been head over heels in love with him for over 2 years. I asked him what was so off putting about me before. His response? "I always knew you were the one. You were just too big." Brutally honest. I went from being too fat for him once and now he tells me I am the love of his life.

    IN

    Before "OMG WHAT DOUCHE"


    Hahaha! There is a fine line. It's understandable if a guy simply doesn't find you attractive because of your size...but when he treats you badly or even...differently?...because of it...that's a different story. (Not saying that's what happened, just my observation on the matter.)

    He was a total douche nozzle when we first met. He took me out to a famous restaurant in Chicago and told me "I am gonna hit on the hostess. Do you have a pen so I can write my number down?" Wtf? Then... he told me he was going to take the train out to my area and I would pic him up. He tells me "Oh man, as soon as I got to the train station, my train pulled away." I'm not stupid. I know it was a lie. So yeah, he was a real friggin' jerkwad and he broke my heart.
    But now... we have an AMAZING relationship. I absolutely love this man and I know his feelings toward me now are genuine. He treats me very well, we have everything in common, we never fight and we just went away together - his first time doing so with a woman. In the 2 years we didn't talk, I had a baby. He has stepped up as a dad to my daughter. He really has changed. My dream was for him to tell me he loved me and he has and I know he means it now. And we have had many many conversations about what happened in the past, for which I forgive him. Forgive yes, but forget no.
  • fit_war
    fit_war Posts: 985 Member
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    Are they important? Yes.
    Are they the most important? No.

    ^^^ this
  • wheird
    wheird Posts: 7,963 Member
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    They are very important. Deal breaker important.

    But they aren't the only important thing.
  • establishingaplace
    establishingaplace Posts: 301 Member
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    Yes, looks are important to me. Here is my favorite look.

    1378215793278.jpg

    How YOU doin?
  • BinaryPulsar
    BinaryPulsar Posts: 8,927 Member
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    I guess I'm weird. I'm attracted to good conversation -shrug- LOL

    Me too! It is the most attractive aspect to me. The conversations I have with my husband, I just fall deeper and deeper in love with him (for these past 18 years). He also has a fit body (just athletic), and a sweet face and eyes. And he is so insightful and kind. He's intelligent. And so funny. Good in bed, too. Adventurous.
    Lol oh mama, that was descriptive! Sounds like you two were defo meant for each other!! I'm so happy you found someone that arouses your intellects as well as your loins! (Bahaha, see if you can figure out what movie that's from).

    :flowerforyou:

    :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou:
  • rockky83
    rockky83 Posts: 59
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    1. Face
    2. Booty
    3. Personality
    4. Boobs

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