Goal reached. Family horrified.

nosebag1212

your dad is a moron srs

eganita

I cannot explain the comments from your family, as I think you look wonderful, fit and healthy!

Perhaps since they were talking with you on Skype there was some weird angle or bad lighting that could be affecting their perspective? Or maybe they are simply so used to your starting look that it will just take them some time to adjust?

gmoneycole

So about a month ago I reached my goal. I am no longer "overweight" but now am right in the middle of the "normal" bmi weight range. I weigh exactly what I did when I was 17, only I am in much better shape because I am eating healthy, and exercise 3 - 5 times a week, mainly weights but also some regular cardio.

I was skyping my family the other night, and my Dad (an ex-OIympic and professional wrestler, and a former college and professional football player, who almost completed a Ph. D in Physical Education, so he knows a lot about fitness and diet), said to me, "We have all been talking about your weight. You look awful. You are too thin. Your sister in law Kim agrees, you look bad. We think you need to gain 15 lbs." And I said, "I have only lost 30 total - that would mean putting on half my weight back." And my sister, nurse with a Ph. D in nursing and long time Professor of nursing and medicine at various universities chimed in and said, "yah, you look awful - especially YOUR FACE! EW!"

That being said, when I was this weight the last time, back in the 1990's, I was doing 4 hours of ballet a week plus cheerleading and marching band, was in great shape, and at that time these same people said, "you need to quit ballet - you are too fat. They don't take short fat girls in ballets. You need to join the football team or find a Sumo Wrestling club." AT THE SAME WEIGHT I AM NOW, where they are saying "your face - EW!"

Frankly I think I am the healthiest and in the best shape I have ever been in. What should I make of what they said? I was sad, then mad, and now I realize that I obviously have some image issues, or what they say wouldn't hurt. Or would it? Would these things hurt other people's feelings too? What do y'all think - is my face so "EW"? Do I look worse than when I started? Here is a pic, me before on the left, last August, and me now on the right. And again, I am right in the middle of the "normal" bmi range, not on the low end at all.

Sorry but I think your dad took a few too many blows to the head! I was a wrestler too and don't have his pedigree but I used to cut weight and was too skinny for sure so I know what eww looks like! Your face looks very pretty and not too thin and your body looks "normal" you don't look fat or too thin at all. I would go into maintenance if I were you and even put a little muscle mass (strength) on if you feel okay with that.

rodduz

Looking fine. Dad was probably overweight as a wrestler that's why he doesn't like skinny. Bet his nutrition knowledge is severely dated too. Sister is clearly jealous.

The next stage for you now if I were your PT would be increasing a bit of muscle mass, a few lbs of fat may come with that as a result but that's fine. Strip it back down then but lift heavy to maintain muscle mass.

mommiejohnsonof6

I dont know why when you lose weight someone always says something when I lost 20 pounds someone ask me how skinny are you trying to get .my weight was 190 and I am 5 feet 4 inches some people just have to talk .just love them and keep going on with your life.

UnoDrea3732

I think you looks great! Sometimes family is just that...family. They do not want to help build you up but rather seen you down to make them feel better. My mom and my sister are the same way and I have let it get the better of me for wayyyy too long... Example..

When I lost 100+lbs my Mom said "losing weight is the easy part - it's keeping it off that is difficult" and my sister didn't even achnowledge me.

When I gained 80lbs back my Mom said "I know honey how hard you worked and how disappointing it must feel to gain the weight back" and she gave me "green coffee bean extract" for christmas. My sister now makes comments on "areas" I should work on.

I love them both but I have now realized that it is my life and I can not let their comments dictate who I am. Keep doing you and don't worry about them.

LFDBabs

You are absolutely beautiful in both pictures. You're after picture is how I'd like to look eventually. Not to thin, but healthy and toned. Don't listen to them. Perhaps it's jealousy. If you are happy, nothing and no one else matters.

stennis

You look awesome. Will you marry me? lol jk Sounds like your family is an educated bunch of fools. Me? An MBA educated old geezer.

samr73

You look wonderful - fit and healthy. You can't (and it sounds like you wouldn't anyway) cut family out of your life so it's a question of managing them.

I've been told that my dad and all of my aunts think my body is looking good but that my face "has gone". Well, thanks for that loved ones!!

Any comments now I smile sweetly and think of the next time I'm working out. My body, my choice. Hopefully the noise will die down and acceptance will reign.

Cortneyrenee04

No one should ever tell anyone that their face is "EW!" I am so mad for you!! I would be so hurt by that. They should know better... right? You look great, don't worry about them. I hope you feel better.

pnelson65

You look beautiful.

MistyMcKendree

You look great! Tell your family to pound sand!

Sophie983

I love your body! It looks fantastic! Do not listen to your family. You have hundreds of people here telling you that they are totally wrong.
Your face was pretty and it still is. You look healthy!

Appelgryn

Not sure what they talking about you look stunning girl, let it run like water off a ducks back:flowerforyou:

ShrinkinMel

UGH what horrible family. They deserve to be dumped. Jealously maybe? You look great and not a bit underweight. WTH Seems your family is quite rude.

MSouthernbelle87

You look great! I've lost 40 pounds and people are telling me to stop but I am no where near a healthy BMI. With that being said when you look in the mirror and feel comfortable that is it. Everyone else opinion can blow!

Susanjellybelly

You know, I think overweight is the new normal. I think our body image of society is a little weird right now and a healthy body weight person is standing out a little bit more. You look, above all, healthy. And lovely, so forget about it.

ccm1912

You look fantastic. This is coming from someone who has been underweight before and knows what it looks like...you are not there. Trust me. Don't let their jealousy get to you. They probably just aren't used to seeing you that thin in a while; they'll get over it.

StaciMarie1974

You look AMAZING. We've all seen people who are scarily thin, and that is not you. (Assuming you haven't lost another 15-25 pounds since the 'after' picture.)

I can see where you are coming from. Family members who should be skilled/knowledgeable in health, fitness matters giving you advice that conflicts with what you believe to be true. So I can also understand your post here - seeking non-biased feedback. I don't know your family dynamic, but some families have a hard time being supportive and happy for each other. Could that play a part of this?

ShrinkinMel

They are your family and they love you! that being said its a normal thing that lots of families do, i am 55 and come from and Italian family and i am also a vegetarian. My family has told me my whole life that I i don't look good, your to thin! amazingly when i am over weight they think i look great! i think they are more comfortable when i am over weight because they are all over weight, if i am thin it forces them to address their own weight issues!
keep up the good weight and they will see you are serious about being healthy and looking your best!

Yep forces them to think of their own weights. Normally I'd say they just say things sarcastically and mean it to be compliment that doesn't come out right, but the comments about your weight when you were younger tell me they are just arses.