I'm a failure

neandermagnon

Thomas Edison made hundreds of lightbulbs that *didn't* work, before he finally made one that did... and now people all over the world use lightbulbs..... if he'd just given up the first time it didn't go right, we'd all be sitting around in candle light (yep I know someone else would have invented it sooner or later... but say that person had given up too? Say no-one had got past the first failure... we'd still be sitting around in caves with not even any fire because I'm sure it took a lot of attempts to figure out how to control fire and make it keep burning when you want it to and not burn your fingers

point being, you may look at someone else's success story and think it was all plain sailing, then look at yourself on a bad day and wonder how you'll ever manage.... just remember that the people who succeeded probably had hundreds of bad days and even days when they were on the brink of giving up, or when nothing went right at all.... but they stuck at it and kept going and so they succeeded.

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An important piece of related advice when it comes to diet - you don't have to be perfect to succeed. You don't have to even be close to perfect... you just have to be *good enough*....you just have to burn a few more calories than you eat each day... you can enjoy all the foods you want to enjoy, just in smaller portion sizes so they fit your calories. If you make life too difficult for yourself then you're going to fall off the wagon sooner or later... so learn how to enjoy eating at a small calorie deficit and how to not feel deprived and you should find it a lot easier to stick to in the long term, and success will come more easily.

DMicheleC

I am in exactly the same place as you, I was doing so well had lost over a stone, went on holiday, ate what I wanted and since I've come back I can't get my mind into it again. I have put on 5lb so far. The exercise I have started doing is going great, it's just the eating side of it. Today when I stood and the scales and had gained again, was the final straw. I know I need to do this now and sort myself out or I will have undone all my good work. So I kind of know how your feeling. But today is another day and I feel a new sense of determination to do this. So I will send you an add request and maybe we can battle this together. Keep smiling you will get there :flowerforyou:

Nckr66

I 'fail' all the time - although I have a lot of weight to lose and heaven knows I REALLY want to lose it, I'm such an emotional timebomb that one bad day has me sinking into junk food, couch potatoism and a wine bottle. BUT I don't think I'm a failure, I'm just a winner that had a bad day. Or three

In all seriousness, I learnt to accept myself as I am now. Me, with a bit of extra weight. My body is still my body, be it fat or thin, and I tell myself everytime I reach for the chocolate or cider that I'm doing it a diservice when I don't nourish correctly and move enough, but the more I blame myself and tell myself I have failed, the more likely I am to do it.

I think the only time you have truly failed is when you tell yourself thats it, you're never going to try again. People with success stories are people who have probably had many bad days, but know that you take the good with the bad, and move forward. I know that I will be tempted again at some point to eat food which I know isn't good for me and that I don't need, but considering I did this solidly for many years without exception, the odd day or two is still a massive improvement.

Flutterloo

You just admitted the problem. Now don't allow yourself to continue sabotaging what you are working for. You are only a failure if you stop trying. Until then, you just made mistakes. Get up, brush yourself off, and get back on the wagon!

Fsunami

Everyone is so good about posting their success stories and everyone is so encouraging and supportive. How about if I'm a failure? What if for 3 days I have been totally backsliding into all of my bad habits of overeating, eating junk, and NOT exercising. I thought it would be a one day fall. THen I committed to getting back on track after two days. Yesterday was three. How do I stop this downward spiral? How do I get my mental strength back for today? How do I not tell myself lies about how it's not worth it and I have so far go that I can't see my goals? And that now I've screwed up what I had started to accomplish?

Like most things in life, once you accept that you cant change a past choice, you decide to move forward.

Looking back & beating the crap out of yourself is counter-productive & introduces negative energy you don't need.

Focus on what you can control, take the emotion out of it & drive on.

“It's not the critic who counts. It's not the man who points out how the strong man stumbled. Credit belongs to the man who really was in the arena, his face marred by dust, sweat, and blood, who strives valiantly, who errs to come short and short again, because there is no effort without error and shortcoming. It is the man who actually strives to do the deeds, who knows the great enthusiasm and knows the great devotion, who spends himself on a worthy cause, who at best, knows in the end the triumph of great achievement. And, who at worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those cold and cruel souls who know neither victory nor defeat.”
― Theodore Roosevelt

moomooatrice

Don't be ridiculous. 12 pounds that is great. 3 day binge - get back on the bandwagon. It took you a lot more time than that to gain the weight. Everyday is a new day and you get a new chance everyday.

It will only suck you under if you tell yourself you are a failure, which you are not. It is not easy - why do you think there are so many people on this site from so many countries. Weight issues transcend boundaries because it is a common problem - so stop punishing yourself. Instead of focusing on the negative - tell yourself - I lost 12 pounds - good for me. A had a little bump in the road - but now I am on track again.

Good luck!

iPlatano

You're only a failure when you quit.

Just because you haven't finished the race doesn't mean you never will- keep going!

+1

cwolfman13

The sooner you get this through your head, the better...

tanyoshka

I totally understand how hard it can be to get back into the rhythm. I recently went on a 4 day vacation where I decided that I was going to eat whatever and whenever I wanted, and boy did I! I got home and used the vacation as an excuse to blow off my next scheduled workouts. I mean, I was tired, and a full week off seems reasonable right? Imagine my horror once I realized that I had gained back 2 of the 5 pounds I had killed myself to lose in the last 2 months. I felt really heavy, unhealthy, and unfit. I was dreading my first day back at the gym because I knew it would be brutal after the time away. But I did it, and you can too! In fact, this morning I ran two miles without stopping for the first time in almost a year. In the grand scheme of things, 2 pounds can be taken off in 1 serious week of diet and exercise. Lesson learned. I'm going to have to rethink my "vacation" philosophy.

I keep thinking of the phrase, "Just because you have a flat tire doesn't mean you have to slash the other three." Pick yourself up and keep going. It's worth it.

MandyH1991

This is me 100 %. I have one bad day & get into the mind set of oh well, and fall back into old habits because of 1 slip up.