Help! He's withering away!

13

Replies

  • _KitKat_
    _KitKat_ Posts: 1,066 Member
    Oatmeal - made with a can of coconut milk - throw in some fruit like blueberries... add some chocolate chips ... it's rich, decadent - and enough calories to probably feed a family in one bowl.

    He is pre diabetic. This could spike him. He needs his doctor.
  • bigblondewolf
    bigblondewolf Posts: 268 Member
    Get off the damn internet and go to the doctor.

    This is actually pretty solid advice. If you know he already has existing health issues, he really should be in to see his doctor to make sure it's not something more serious.

    Also, you should check out some of the nutrition bars on the market. They're usually pretty high calorie so good for putting on weight and a quick way to get in a breakfast. However, you have to read labels and be pretty choosing to make sure you're not getting sugary junk. My fave are the Larabars, but I'm not sure if their offered internationally :)
  • neandermagnon
    neandermagnon Posts: 7,436 Member
    And please don't use "yuck" to describe your husband who seems to be having medical problems. Poor guy.

    +1
  • Momjogger
    Momjogger Posts: 750 Member
    Doctor yes. Also try to make cooking for him or eating out fun and romantic. Seduce him with food.......
  • meganjcallaghan
    meganjcallaghan Posts: 949 Member
    Yup. Time to hit up a doctor and see what they say. I'm sure he'll need to get his blood work done more often to keep track of what's going on and should probably be referred to a nutritionist as he'll need to find high calorie options that don't have a high glycemic load. Pasta is great for adding calories for a non-diabetic, but carbs are not the best choice for diabetics or pre-diabetics.
  • morehealthymatt
    morehealthymatt Posts: 208 Member
    reward him with things he enjoys if he starts eating healthier.
  • RaspberryKeytoneBoondoggle
    RaspberryKeytoneBoondoggle Posts: 1,349 Member
    Yuck did offend me. We all have to stop thinking it's ok to be rude when we're talking about thin.
  • ebrggqe
    ebrggqe Posts: 8 Member
    People here are wonderful, but because your husband is diabetic and has lost so much weight he really needs to get immediate help from a doctor or nutritionist. I don't know about "yuck". It seems more like a "yikes" situation to me.

    This ^^ Unintentional weight loss can be the first sign of several serious medical conditions.

    +2
  • Car2992
    Car2992 Posts: 4
    See a nutritionist. :-)
  • mereditheve
    mereditheve Posts: 142 Member
    You've already received good advice from the people who said to have him see a doctor. There are a number of illnesses, most of them serious, that cause unintentional weight loss. Cancer is one of them.

    You described his diet as not being particularly healthy, but PB&J sandwiches and ice cream is probably not the cause of his weight loss (otherwise we'd all be on that diet).
  • jjplato
    jjplato Posts: 155 Member
    PB&J sandwiches and ice cream is probably not the cause of his weight loss (otherwise we'd all be on that diet).

    OP said he eats 2 PB&J sandwiches and a pint of ice cream - that's it.

    Two PB&J sandwiches: roughly 800 calories
    One pint of Breyer's chocolate ice cream: 560 calories
    Total: 1360 calories
    ^^ this is why he's losing weight. Even if he was eating Ben & Jerry's, it wouldn't be enough to sustain his weight, especially with a job that requires him to be on his feet most of the day.

    Seriously, a grown man who eats PB&J sandwiches and ice cream as his only form of sustenance most likely isn't dying of cancer. It's a guy who doesn't care about nutrition or his own health.
  • RodaRose
    RodaRose Posts: 9,562 Member
    He has a Dr appt this week so hopefully we will get some solid answers. Thank you sooo much for the helpful answers. I try to help him every way I can but I cant keep him away from sugar...hes a grown man...lol. I cook for him, encourage him, give him tips, advice etc, but Its up to him I guess.

    Thank you for getting back to us to let us now that he has an appointment.

    For now, stop focusing on what he is eating. Leave him be until you both know what is going on.

    RR
  • 6yuu
    6yuu Posts: 30 Member
    Make sure he eats lots of veggies and foods that are high in protein and iron. Suggest that he makes big smoothies for breakfast that you can put supplementary powders in (for nutrients). Also nuts and seeds, especially almonds. Good luck!
  • LucasEVille
    LucasEVille Posts: 567 Member
    "No offense" doesn't make it better.

    I usually find that people who said "No offense" are about to say something pretty offensive.
  • SmaugHugs
    SmaugHugs Posts: 60 Member
    I started packing my boyfriend's lunches whenever I could. He is also gaining though, but I got him out of the bchelor food lifestyle and he started to put on weight and turned it to muscle by going to the gym. One thing that really helped was I had dinners prepared so he couldn't say they weren't there or that he was too tired to make anything. And on my days off I would make somethin a bit more extravagent, like roast chicken dinner on the weekends with a chicken, mashed potatoes, steamed veggies, whole grain stuffing, cranberry sauce.

    I found preparing foods in advance to be greatly beneficial to getting him gain.

    Breakfast sandwiches, pancakes, waffle sticks ( all home made and whole wheat or unbleached white) in the freezer for him to toast or micrwave before leaving or once at work.

    Making excess of meals and having plenty of tuperware on hand. All ectras are basically tuend in to TV dinners and kept in the freezer for easy re-heat and lunches.

    Even when I make homemade burgers, I make extra and layer them with wax paper in a freezer bag in the freezer for easy access for him when I work late.


    If it is prepared, there is no excuse not to eat it.
  • HaelaBaer
    HaelaBaer Posts: 44
    If he's on board with healthy food, then he should be on board with helping himself too. Here's what I do: go to bed earlier so I can get up earlier and make breakfast. Boil an egg for lunch every day and drink a protein shake or the like pre workout. On the weekends cook lots of chicken and bag it for a healthy snack ( this I do for my weight lifting son and hubby, but I add it to my own salads for quick protein dinners).
    Ultimately it's his choice. Pb and j is fine, but I'd stop buying ice cream if he eats so much. IMHO
  • MrTolerable
    MrTolerable Posts: 1,593 Member
    My husband is wasting away...his eating habits are atrocious yet he has lost 20 pounds in 2 years...not trying to. How can I get more calories in him. He's pre diabetic on top of everything else...and he refuses to lift weights. His stats are 5'11 139...yuck. no offense.Help!

    ^that sounds terrible..

    does he consume any alcohol or other substances?

    and.. you really should talk to him about it.. 0_o
  • devil_in_a_blue_dress
    devil_in_a_blue_dress Posts: 5,214 Member
    If he's on board with healthy food, then he should be on board with helping himself too. Here's what I do: go to bed earlier so I can get up earlier and make breakfast. Boil an egg for lunch every day and drink a protein shake or the like pre workout. On the weekends cook lots of chicken and bag it for a healthy snack ( this I do for my weight lifting son and hubby, but I add it to my own salads for quick protein dinners).
    Ultimately it's his choice. Pb and j is fine, but I'd stop buying ice cream if he eats so much. IMHO

    What the absolute heck are you talking about...

    Stop buying the food he eats when he is "withering way" and sub with lean protein...

    I can't even right now --
  • MrTolerable
    MrTolerable Posts: 1,593 Member
    I started packing my boyfriend's lunches whenever I could. He is also gaining though, but I got him out of the bchelor food lifestyle and he started to put on weight and turned it to muscle by going to the gym. One thing that really helped was I had dinners prepared so he couldn't say they weren't there or that he was too tired to make anything. And on my days off I would make somethin a bit more extravagent, like roast chicken dinner on the weekends with a chicken, mashed potatoes, steamed veggies, whole grain stuffing, cranberry sauce.

    I found preparing foods in advance to be greatly beneficial to getting him gain.

    Breakfast sandwiches, pancakes, waffle sticks ( all home made and whole wheat or unbleached white) in the freezer for him to toast or micrwave before leaving or once at work.

    Making excess of meals and having plenty of tuperware on hand. All ectras are basically tuend in to TV dinners and kept in the freezer for easy re-heat and lunches.

    Even when I make homemade burgers, I make extra and layer them with wax paper in a freezer bag in the freezer for easy access for him when I work late.


    If it is prepared, there is no excuse not to eat it.

    marry me? :flowerforyou:
  • Sabine_Stroehm
    Sabine_Stroehm Posts: 19,263 Member
    People here are wonderful, but because your husband is diabetic and has lost so much weight he really needs to get immediate help from a doctor or nutritionist. I don't know about "yuck". It seems more like a "yikes" situation to me.
    ^^this^^ Sounds like it's time to visit a doctor who specializes in nutrition for folks with diabetes.
  • UFITYETXX
    UFITYETXX Posts: 38
    Yup I dont love my husband at all. Sorry I said YUCK really people????? IM a terrible wife for being concerned about my husbands overly skinny body and his utter disregard for his health or his looks. I work on myself on a daily basis to reach a certain health and fitness goal and he sits around and eats an entire bag of hostess mini donuts and a monster. Im a little grossed out by it. I cook for him alllll the tme but he works 4am to 2 pm. Im at work till 7. He works at a grocery store! I think he would feel the same way about me if I were overly skinny. Whatever...anyway thanks for the solid advice and I will get him a good divorce lawyer.....
  • jjplato
    jjplato Posts: 155 Member
    Yup I dont love my husband at all. Sorry I said YUCK really people????? IM a terrible wife for being concerned about my husbands overly skinny body and his utter disregard for his health or his looks. I work on myself on a daily basis to reach a certain health and fitness goal and he sits around and eats an entire bag of hostess mini donuts and a monster. Im a little grossed out by it. I cook for him alllll the tme but he works 4am to 2 pm. Im at work till 7. He works at a grocery store! I think he would feel the same way about me if I were overly skinny. Whatever...anyway thanks for the solid advice and I will get him a good divorce lawyer.....

    I'm with you. Some people on MFP will jump on you for anything -- a couple of days ago somebody said they threw their junk food out and a couple of people went to pieces over the fact that it wasn't donated to a food bank. I've read some of the responses here, and I'm sure they're all well-intentioned, but seriously -- mix ice cream into everything he eats? Reward him for eating more? This *is* a fully-grown adult male we're talking about, and not a seven year old, or a puppy, right? You can't put him in a high chair and feed him with a spoon. If somebody willfully neglects their health and they wind up looking bony and unattractive, that's their issue not yours -- no different than if he stopped brushing his teeth or bathing.
  • HaelaBaer
    HaelaBaer Posts: 44
    If he's on board with healthy food, then he should be on board with helping himself too. Here's what I do: go to bed earlier so I can get up earlier and make breakfast. Boil an egg for lunch every day and drink a protein shake or the like pre workout. On the weekends cook lots of chicken and bag it for a healthy snack ( this I do for my weight lifting son and hubby, but I add it to my own salads for quick protein dinners).
    Ultimately it's his choice. Pb and j is fine, but I'd stop buying ice cream if he eats so much. IMHO

    What the absolute heck are you talking about...

    Stop buying the food he eats when he is "withering way" and sub with lean protein...

    I can't even right now --

    'Here's what I do' .....your results may vary.

    My personal doctor didn't recommend a pint of ice cream every night to help my kid gain weight for the military. And my kid wasn't diabetic or pre. I said -I- have chicken breasts pre cooked for snacks.....

    But whatever; the poor poster has deleted her account. Perhaps they realized that arguing on an Internet forum is a waste. Or perhaps they took their husband to a doctor, which is the bestest advice.
  • devil_in_a_blue_dress
    devil_in_a_blue_dress Posts: 5,214 Member
    If he's on board with healthy food, then he should be on board with helping himself too. Here's what I do: go to bed earlier so I can get up earlier and make breakfast. Boil an egg for lunch every day and drink a protein shake or the like pre workout. On the weekends cook lots of chicken and bag it for a healthy snack ( this I do for my weight lifting son and hubby, but I add it to my own salads for quick protein dinners).
    Ultimately it's his choice. Pb and j is fine, but I'd stop buying ice cream if he eats so much. IMHO

    What the absolute heck are you talking about...

    Stop buying the food he eats when he is "withering way" and sub with lean protein...

    I can't even right now --

    'Here's what I do' .....your results may vary.

    My personal doctor didn't recommend a pint of ice cream every night to help my kid gain weight for the military. And my kid wasn't diabetic or pre. I said -I- have chicken breasts pre cooked for snacks.....

    But whatever; the poor poster has deleted her account. Perhaps they realized that arguing on an Internet forum is a waste. Or perhaps they took their husband to a doctor, which is the bestest advice.

    Why is jelly ok, but ice cream isn't? You have a very obvious agenda that some food is good, while others is bad and that's bull.

    If OP, who can't seem to stop losing weight, eating ice cream while he waits to get to the doctor for actual medical advice, that's better than trying to force feed him food he doesn't want to eat and him losing more weight and trying to control him like a child.
  • Derpes
    Derpes Posts: 2,033 Member
    If he's on board with healthy food, then he should be on board with helping himself too. Here's what I do: go to bed earlier so I can get up earlier and make breakfast. Boil an egg for lunch every day and drink a protein shake or the like pre workout. On the weekends cook lots of chicken and bag it for a healthy snack ( this I do for my weight lifting son and hubby, but I add it to my own salads for quick protein dinners).
    Ultimately it's his choice. Pb and j is fine, but I'd stop buying ice cream if he eats so much. IMHO

    This response makes zero sense.

    She's trying to get the guy to eat, not loathe food.

    Watch out for that evil ice cream!
  • bajoyba
    bajoyba Posts: 1,153 Member
    If he's on board with healthy food, then he should be on board with helping himself too. Here's what I do: go to bed earlier so I can get up earlier and make breakfast. Boil an egg for lunch every day and drink a protein shake or the like pre workout. On the weekends cook lots of chicken and bag it for a healthy snack ( this I do for my weight lifting son and hubby, but I add it to my own salads for quick protein dinners).
    Ultimately it's his choice. Pb and j is fine, but I'd stop buying ice cream if he eats so much. IMHO

    What the absolute heck are you talking about...

    Stop buying the food he eats when he is "withering way" and sub with lean protein...

    I can't even right now --

    'Here's what I do' .....your results may vary.

    My personal doctor didn't recommend a pint of ice cream every night to help my kid gain weight for the military. And my kid wasn't diabetic or pre. I said -I- have chicken breasts pre cooked for snacks.....

    But whatever; the poor poster has deleted her account. Perhaps they realized that arguing on an Internet forum is a waste. Or perhaps they took their husband to a doctor, which is the bestest advice.

    Why is jelly ok, but ice cream isn't? You have a very obvious agenda that some food is good, while others is bad and that's bull.

    If OP, who can't seem to stop losing weight, eating ice cream while he waits to get to the doctor for actual medical advice, that's better than trying to force feed him food he doesn't want to eat and him losing more weight and trying to control him like a child.

    Yeah, so, I'm just throwin' this out there:

    If you make a PB&J sandwich with 2 slices of wheat bread, a serving of natural peanut butter, and a serving of grape jelly, your sandwich has about 45g of carbs and 20g of sugar. That's if you actually weigh out a serving of peanut butter and jelly.

    If you have a single serving of Ben & Jerry's Cherry Garcia, your ice cream has 28g of carbs and 23g of sugar.

    If being diabetic or pre-diabetic is the concern here, I still say ice cream is the better choice.
  • RabbitLost
    RabbitLost Posts: 333 Member
    If he's on board with healthy food, then he should be on board with helping himself too. Here's what I do: go to bed earlier so I can get up earlier and make breakfast. Boil an egg for lunch every day and drink a protein shake or the like pre workout. On the weekends cook lots of chicken and bag it for a healthy snack ( this I do for my weight lifting son and hubby, but I add it to my own salads for quick protein dinners).
    Ultimately it's his choice. Pb and j is fine, but I'd stop buying ice cream if he eats so much. IMHO

    What the absolute heck are you talking about...

    Stop buying the food he eats when he is "withering way" and sub with lean protein...

    I can't even right now --

    'Here's what I do' .....your results may vary.

    My personal doctor didn't recommend a pint of ice cream every night to help my kid gain weight for the military. And my kid wasn't diabetic or pre. I said -I- have chicken breasts pre cooked for snacks.....

    But whatever; the poor poster has deleted her account. Perhaps they realized that arguing on an Internet forum is a waste. Or perhaps they took their husband to a doctor, which is the bestest advice.

    Why is jelly ok, but ice cream isn't? You have a very obvious agenda that some food is good, while others is bad and that's bull.

    If OP, who can't seem to stop losing weight, eating ice cream while he waits to get to the doctor for actual medical advice, that's better than trying to force feed him food he doesn't want to eat and him losing more weight and trying to control him like a child.

    Yeah, so, I'm just throwin' this out there:

    If you make a PB&J sandwich with 2 slices of wheat bread, a serving of natural peanut butter, and a serving of grape jelly, your sandwich has about 45g of carbs and 20g of sugar. That's if you actually weigh out a serving of peanut butter and jelly.

    If you have a single serving of Ben & Jerry's Cherry Garcia, your ice cream has 28g of carbs and 23g of sugar.

    If being diabetic or pre-diabetic is the concern here, I still say ice cream is the better choice.

    This is no place for math or logic. :smokin:
  • bajoyba
    bajoyba Posts: 1,153 Member
    If he's on board with healthy food, then he should be on board with helping himself too. Here's what I do: go to bed earlier so I can get up earlier and make breakfast. Boil an egg for lunch every day and drink a protein shake or the like pre workout. On the weekends cook lots of chicken and bag it for a healthy snack ( this I do for my weight lifting son and hubby, but I add it to my own salads for quick protein dinners).
    Ultimately it's his choice. Pb and j is fine, but I'd stop buying ice cream if he eats so much. IMHO

    What the absolute heck are you talking about...

    Stop buying the food he eats when he is "withering way" and sub with lean protein...

    I can't even right now --

    'Here's what I do' .....your results may vary.

    My personal doctor didn't recommend a pint of ice cream every night to help my kid gain weight for the military. And my kid wasn't diabetic or pre. I said -I- have chicken breasts pre cooked for snacks.....

    But whatever; the poor poster has deleted her account. Perhaps they realized that arguing on an Internet forum is a waste. Or perhaps they took their husband to a doctor, which is the bestest advice.

    Why is jelly ok, but ice cream isn't? You have a very obvious agenda that some food is good, while others is bad and that's bull.

    If OP, who can't seem to stop losing weight, eating ice cream while he waits to get to the doctor for actual medical advice, that's better than trying to force feed him food he doesn't want to eat and him losing more weight and trying to control him like a child.

    Yeah, so, I'm just throwin' this out there:

    If you make a PB&J sandwich with 2 slices of wheat bread, a serving of natural peanut butter, and a serving of grape jelly, your sandwich has about 45g of carbs and 20g of sugar. That's if you actually weigh out a serving of peanut butter and jelly.

    If you have a single serving of Ben & Jerry's Cherry Garcia, your ice cream has 28g of carbs and 23g of sugar.

    If being diabetic or pre-diabetic is the concern here, I still say ice cream is the better choice.

    This is no place for math or logic. :smokin:

    Oops! My bad. :smile:
  • Hello,

    I am so sorry to hear about your husband. I would suggest cooking his food in olive oil (essential fats) maybe up the protein with full fat greek yoghurt (there isn't much sugar in this), chicken legs (more fat than the breast), just make sure it is full fat, dark chocolate is also good (75% to 85% has less sugar) also make sure he eats balanced carbs. I would suggest a Mediterranean Diet for him as it has a good amount of fat.

    Wishing you and your husband well.
  • princessmommy122
    princessmommy122 Posts: 135 Member
    This happened to a friend of mine. He is actually a big eater. But he just got really thin. The doctors were concerned but it turned out to be purely genetic. His father also became a string bean once he hit middle age. If he's per diabetic He should see a dietician ASAP.