Because Fat-Shaming is Sooo Cool

MegE_N

It has to be built back, sometimes through pictures of happy, fat women in bikinis.

This is a thing? I didn't know there was such a thing as a fat woman being happy in a bikini. I'm not trying to be a pr!ck, it's just not something I ever thought was possible. I remember being in a change room at Swimco with my wife. My eyes were opened that day, listening to the women as they tried on bathing suits. Women I thought were fit and looked nice, breaking down in tears in front of the sales people.

Google 'fatkini'.

redversustheblue

This is where fat acceptance comes in, and actually has a role. You can't tell a girl 'it's what is inside that counts' one day and 'how dare you even come out on the street where decent people can see you?' the next.

Fat acceptance is about not being afraid to be happy and enjoy life despite your size. It is NOT about promoting gaining unhealthy amounts of weight for poops and chuckles. This is what a lot of people don't seem to understand.

As someone who has been fat all my life, the fat acceptance movement really helped me lead a fuller, richer existence. It made me realize I can do well in my career, have friends, and fall in love - and that doing all of those things while being fat was ok. And in turn, it made me realize that I can take control of my weight. That's why I'm here.

I know on MFP I'm going to take a lot of flack for being pro-fat acceptance, but there it is.

Also please replace the word 'fat' with 'gay' and tell me if that article is still considered okay. No? Hmm, that should be a clue.

+1

The nerve of those girls for having fun and laughing with each other while being fat. Or wearing less clothing during the summer time because they should obviously be hiding their fat rolls with garbage bags so as to not make this woman sneer about something that does not affect her.

I too really benefited from the fat acceptance movement. I was morbidly obese, but thanks to the assurances of my friends and family as well as positive messages from the media, it wasn't soul crushing. There were some things that I still got down about (I wasn't sure I'd ever find a guy, but was also wrong about that), but for the most part I could look in the mirror and see a beautiful, confident woman. The things I did mattered, even though I did them while overweight.

And when I decided my weight had gotten too high, I didn't stop and tell myself that I'm beautiful just the way I am so I don't have to lose weight. I said I'm beautiful, but losing weight will make me feel even more so in addition to being better for my health. It's possible we need to find a middle ground when it comes to parenting (Assuring your child he or she is worthwhile no matter their size, while also promoting healthy food and activity choices to preserve their health), but his article just aims to make people feel bad for existing while fat. How is that even a little helpful?

Or how dare three friends share a bag of chips??

This article disgusts me. Sure, she makes some valid points, but she is so derogatory and downright mean that it overshadows whatever it was she was trying to say.

MegE_N

Is alcoholic acceptance a thing? Drug abuser acceptance?

I'm not saying it's laudable to go around haranguing people, but fat acceptance often seems like little more than a thin veneer of rationalization. Yeah, try to be happy whether you're fat, skinny, tall, short, or whatever, but don't act surprised when people have a poor opinion of your voluntary actions.

Fat acceptance is about trying to be happy if you're fat. That's why I said it's just this circle of people who are (or should be, by extension) about being happy whoever you are.

I can't speak for alcoholics or drug abusers. I have never been down that path. But in my life and in the lives of the people I've met through the fat acceptance movement, being able to accept that you are worth the work is a major starting point to getting healthy.

yo_andi

Personally, I don't understand why people think that flinging around insults is a motivator. I mean, sure, some people can get angry and use that anger towards working out. But most people aren't motivated that way.

If a kid was struggling with reading, you wouldn't scream at him that he is a worthless, illiterate. You would take time to encourage him and help educate him.

You also wouldn't coddle him and tell him it's okay if he gives up on learning to read because he's struggling with it. You would teach him to do the work, put in the time and eventually he'll be able to read much more easily. In theory fat acceptance is about "acceptance" but in practice if you spend any amount of time around people who ascribe to the movement, it is about finding excuses and coddling each other out of having to take responsibility and having to do the work.

Hophead43

Apparently she can't discern the difference of fat and natural curves!

They were not chubby, but fat. They had bulging bellies and billowing pillows of back and shoulder stuffing, punctured by flabby arms and lardy legs that no amount of fake-tan could disguise.

She's discerning just fine. She's talking about fat. She made that very clear and included helpful pictures. This is not "natural curves" unless you consider "bulging bellies" and "billowing pillows" of rolls on their back to be natural curves.

Have to agree here...there is nothing natural about the above curves.

UsedToBeHusky

Personally, I don't understand why people think that flinging around insults is a motivator. I mean, sure, some people can get angry and use that anger towards working out. But most people aren't motivated that way.

If a kid was struggling with reading, you wouldn't scream at him that he is a worthless, illiterate. You would take time to encourage him and help educate him.

You also wouldn't coddle him and tell him it's okay if he gives up on learning to read because he's struggling with it. You would teach him to do the work, put in the time and eventually he'll be able to read much more easily. In theory fat acceptance is about "acceptance" but in practice if you spend any amount of time around people who ascribe to the movement, it is about finding excuses and coddling each other out of having to take responsibility and having to do the work.

Okay, but pointing out to someone that their form is not aesthetically pleasing isn't remotely close to encouraging or teaching. That is my point.

bciloveme2014

Also the woman who wrote it looks like she has been Horngry for about 10 years... that might where the venom comes from.

^ this

DeguelloTex

Is alcoholic acceptance a thing? Drug abuser acceptance?

I'm not saying it's laudable to go around haranguing people, but fat acceptance often seems like little more than a thin veneer of rationalization. Yeah, try to be happy whether you're fat, skinny, tall, short, or whatever, but don't act surprised when people have a poor opinion of your voluntary actions.

Fat acceptance is about trying to be happy if you're fat. That's why I said it's just this circle of people who are (or should be, by extension) about being happy whoever you are.

I can't speak for alcoholics or drug abusers. I have never been down that path. But in my life and in the lives of the people I've met through the fat acceptance movement, being able to accept that you are worth the work is a major starting point to getting healthy.

That's not really fat acceptance, though. It's you acceptance. It may be your definition, but you don't have to look far to find people who aren't so much trying to be happy if they're fat, they're happy that they're fat.

Ivey05131980

ge105

Anybody else read this article while eating ice cream? :happy:

oregonzoo

Also notice she's not very nice to skinny women either.

She said Keira Knightly had fried egg boobies.

brower47

These topics always give me a headache.

You shouldn't be a jerk to people based on their looks be it fat, thin, race or your perception of their attractiveness.

Name calling is bad.

Personally, I will not accept that my extra weight is or was okay (health wise). I did not and do not base my self worth on my weight but I definitely feel better now that I've lost and kept off 40 lbs. Maybe that makes me a bad person within the 'fat acceptance' community because if I feel better now about my current weight, that means I felt worse about myself when I was clinically obese. I understand the idea that you shouldn't hate yourself for being overweight or obese and that you should be able to be a happy person (I was happy despite my weight but not as happy as I am now) but it's the word 'acceptance' that always rubs me wrong.

In all the ways I've ever seen the word acceptance used (except for the title of this movement) it means you've accepted something about yourself (or anyone and anything) that you can't change.You have to accept unchangeable things because the ONLY other alternative is to be miserable. But you can change your weight and fitness level. Maybe if it used a different word, the concept of being able to be a happy person despite your weight might not cause such controversy. It casts an automatic idea to the public at large that those within the acceptance community then have to clarify (as has been done in every thread of this type that I've run across). TLDR: the movement shot itself in the foot with it's poorly chosen, inflammatory name

I always leave these threads thinking the same things:

- Descent people should not use inflammatory language with the intent to shame others.

- Everyone should be able to be a happy, productive person no matter their weight.

- It's hypocritical to call someone out for being a name calling jerk and then do the exact same thing right back.

- I hope that everyone that's overweight/obese one day finds their own desire to become a potentially healthier person.

- Tax payer funded health care makes this topic far more complicated (which I won't touch with a ten foot pole).

- cake > pie

- I like turtles.

yo_andi

Anybody else read this article while eating ice cream? :happy:

Chocolate... but close enough!

_Emma_Problema_

You know, for a site where "because science" get said often as a mantra, it's surprising how little people know about the scientific research surrounding obesity that isn't about losing weight but why people become overweight or obese in the first place.

There are genetic factors to it, just like being gay. The genetic contribution to your body weight is the same as that of your height, which is 70%.

Ever met the kid who complained about not being able to gain weight- the skinny awkward teenager who wanted to bulk up? Ever met the girl who no matter how hard she tried and how stringent her diet she couldn't lose weight?

Wanna know why? Because science.

Does an obesogenic environment contribute to obesity? Definitely yes. Do our dietary behaviors impact our weight? Obviously yes. But they aren't the sole reason for one's body weight.

And I won't even touch on the role that socio-economic status plays in obesity trends.

The idea that weight is all personal choice is garbage. I would like to see the scientific papers that prove that it is.

supplemama

Fat acceptance is probably one of the most damaging things to health and fitness. It tells people that fat is normal and acceptable and not a very obvious sign that they need to change their habits. Fat isn't healthy, at all. It's a symptom of eating disorders, health problems, or other issues. This would be like "rash acceptance" or something. Fat is a sign of a problem. Do not embrace it and encourage it.

Agreed, the thing is, though, while people are losing weight it is ok for them to love themselves and feel good about themselves. Or even if they never lose weight. I think that is the/was the original intention of the Fat Acceptance movement. I truly don't think the intention was to encourage people into ill health and and early death.

MegE_N

Is alcoholic acceptance a thing? Drug abuser acceptance?

I'm not saying it's laudable to go around haranguing people, but fat acceptance often seems like little more than a thin veneer of rationalization. Yeah, try to be happy whether you're fat, skinny, tall, short, or whatever, but don't act surprised when people have a poor opinion of your voluntary actions.

Fat acceptance is about trying to be happy if you're fat. That's why I said it's just this circle of people who are (or should be, by extension) about being happy whoever you are.

I can't speak for alcoholics or drug abusers. I have never been down that path. But in my life and in the lives of the people I've met through the fat acceptance movement, being able to accept that you are worth the work is a major starting point to getting healthy.

That's not really fat acceptance, though. It's you acceptance. It may be your definition, but you don't have to look far to find people who aren't so much trying to be happy if they're fat, they're happy that they're fat.

Like I said, people who want excuses will usually find one. But for most of my life I was fat. That wasn't just how I looked or how my waistline was. For so many people that was ALL that I was. And that becomes internalized, it becomes believed. I am not unique in that experience. There's threads here on MFP asking users about their experiences about being fat. The things that you hear are heartbreaking. And most people can't pick a handful of experiences. They have hundreds of experiences, because fat is a choice, therefore speaking out against fat people is okay. It's fine to treat them like garbage because they did it to themselves and they have it coming. They don't deserve the respect of other people because they chose this life.

Coming to the realization that I can be fat AND sassy AND educated AND witty AND desirable AND fun is what fat acceptance has been to me. Not all communities are like that. Not all people are like that. But many of them are, and I'm so pleased to promote that.

Mikkimeow

As a formerly obese lady that has loss 60 lbs, but still fat person, I see a couple great points to what she says. I also think she's an idiot, incredibly rude, no one should take her seriously, and looks like she smells like Vaseline, but what do I know? *continues to read thread while eating Chipotle*

DeguelloTex

- cake > pie

- I like turtles.

I was with you all the way down to here. Chocolate pie is better than some cakes. So are apple and tart cherry.

Still, ^ this.

_Pseudonymous_

- cake > pie

- I like turtles.

I was with you all the way down to here. Chocolate pie is better than some cakes. So are apple and tart cherry.

Still, ^ this.

Lies. Pie always wins.