Make my roommate get a life!
Hey this is totally not weight loss or fitness related.
I'm 24 and lived away at college and had an apartment prior to this one. My roommate just moved out of his parent's house and commuted to college. He doesn't have many friends, and almost no hobbies.
How can I nicely tell him to get a life so I can have the living room sometimes? When I bring friends over he assumes he should be there and involved. We are friends, but not to the point that he needs to always be around my friends and I.
Advice?
I'm 24 and lived away at college and had an apartment prior to this one. My roommate just moved out of his parent's house and commuted to college. He doesn't have many friends, and almost no hobbies.
How can I nicely tell him to get a life so I can have the living room sometimes? When I bring friends over he assumes he should be there and involved. We are friends, but not to the point that he needs to always be around my friends and I.
Advice?
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Replies
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Just break up.0
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He sounds like an introvert. As an introvert who also struggled through college, involve that poor guy in your activities and stop treating him like an outcast. Maybe get to know him better - you might find yourself with an additional friend.0
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The roommate is male... and your a female...
:huh:0 -
The roommate is male... and your a female...
:huh:
Yep!! Times have definitely changed. 20 years ago if a female needed a room mate they advertised for a female room mate. I know a lot of dads out there that would have a fit if they found their daughter had a male room mate. Even adult, 24 year old, daughter.0 -
If u want alone time with your friends don't bring them back to your place. Or tell him before hand if he wouldn't mind making himself scarce for a few hours. If you go about it the right way it shouldn't be a problem0
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I'm thinking you're just going to have to confront him and tell him what you want. I'm an introvert also and if I was paying half the rent I would expect to be able to use the living room whenever I need. If you plan on having friends over just tell him in a friendly way that you need your private girl time and to see if he could give you the space for awhile.0
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You need to find a new roommate. You two are not compatible.0
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The roommate is male... and your a female...
:huh:
God only knows what they were up to in there, and furthermore Susan I wouldn't be the least bit surprised to learn that all four of them habitually smoked marijuana cigarettes..... reefers0 -
Tell him this....Roomate,
Get a life so I can have the living room sometimes. When I bring friends over you assume you should be there and involved. We are friends, but not to the point that you needs to always be around my friends and I.
Thank you for your understanding. Now whats for dinner?0 -
If you don't want to share your friends or your living room with your roomate, then you should probably not have a roomate.0
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Oh, and just to be clear, you arent friends. You merely tolerate him as a bill payer.0
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As an introvert I understand completely how he feels. Sounds like you two are not a good fit as roommates. I would normally advise you to just talk to him about a schedule that allows you each to use the space alone at different times, but in your case you just need a different roommate.0
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When i lived with my roommate last year she would have her friends over alot.... the thing is though sitting around with girls having girl time and talking girl stuff doesnt really seem like much of a fun evening for a dude:/ when my roommate had her friends over i was in the gym most of the time anyway and when i had guy freinds over she just stayed in her half of the house and let me have the living room. Problem solved.0
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As an introvert I understand completely how he feels. Sounds like you two are not a good fit as roommates. I would normally advise you to just talk to him about a schedule that allows you each to use the space alone at different times, but in your case you just need a different roommate.
A different roommate or to live alone. OP needs a close female friend to live with her.0 -
If you don't want to share your friends or your living room with your roomate, then you should probably not have a roomate.
This...
My roommate is a bit of an introvert and somewhat depressed. She spends most of her time in her room. We do talk and hang out sometimes, but I would never tell her she should get a life, or that she should maybe get out of the house. It's not my place.
I understand that you sometimes want to use the living room too, but I'm gonna guess he's paying half the bills, he has as much right to the living room as you do. You can't make someone who is introverted into an extrovert.
I second, just break up. Or in this case, find a new roommate.0 -
If you don't want to share your friends or your living room with your roomate, then you should probably not have a roomate.
YEP!0 -
When i lived with my roommate last year she would have her friends over alot.... the thing is though sitting around with girls having girl time and talking girl stuff doesnt really seem like much of a fun evening for a dude:/ when my roommate had her friends over i was in the gym most of the time anyway and when i had guy freinds over she just stayed in her half of the house and let me have the living room. Problem solved.
It is different for an introverted guy with few friends.0 -
I'm thinking you're just going to have to confront him and tell him what you want. I'm an introvert also and if I was paying half the rent I would expect to be able to use the living room whenever I need. If you plan on having friends over just tell him in a friendly way that you need your private girl time and to see if he could give you the space for awhile.
I agree with this.
And to be honest, the subject line actually bothers me. Your roommate does have a life and he chooses to spend his time at home. What's so wrong with that? Just because he's probably not as outgoing as you are, that doesn't mean something is wrong with him. He's just a homebody.0 -
If u want alone time with your friends don't bring them back to your place.
This.0 -
I hope your roommate finds a better roommate0
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Um, I don't know why he would ever leave the house. It's scary out there and there are multiple seasons of game of thrones. You should be more supportive OP!0
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She does not have the right to the livingroom 50% of the time. They both have the right 100% of the time. Just because she invites people over does not mean he has to corral himself in his bedroom.0
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how's the rent split up between the 2 of you?0
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Does he pay his rent?0
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Um, I don't know why he would ever leave the house. It's scary out there and there are multiple seasons of game of thrones. You should be more supportive OP!
Game of thrones, the walking dead, sons of anarchy.... list goes on, plenty to keep him amused when your friends are round, just buy him a dvd player:p0 -
How can I nicely tell him to get a life so I can have the living room sometimes? When I bring friends over he assumes he should be there and involved. We are friends, but not to the point that he needs to always be around my friends and I.
Advice?
Ahh roommates...
So here's the thing that sucks...it's his living room too. He pays rent and it's a shared space. So you either put your big girl britches on and tell him "hey...I need you to leave on X day for a get together with my friends" or you just need to do it at someone else's place.
Passive isn't the way to go. If being direct doesn't work...lease renewal time comes around think about moving.0 -
Implement GIRLS NIGHT once in a while and tell him you really need some female bonding time to talk about periods and ****... He should get the point. But you also have to look at it like this... If the dude is paying bills the place is kind of his too and he doesn't have to leave...0
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The roommate is male... and your a female...
:huh:
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buy him a playstation0
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The roommate is male... and your a female...
:huh:
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