Top Pick Up Lines

Ryandecheney314
Ryandecheney314 Posts: 139 Member
in Chit-Chat
I am seriously friggin bored sitting here at work. Some Employees and I are talking about funny pick up lines and no one seems to have any REAL good ones. So I am counting on you guys to provide the best pick up line you can think of.

My Favorites are:
Let's play carpenter. First we'll get hammered, then I'll nail you.
Do you like bacon? Wanna strip?
Are you a shark? Cause I've got some swimmers for you to swallow.
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Replies

  • SheGlows
    SheGlows Posts: 520 Member
    Hey, I'm Alice, and I want your body to be my wonderland. :love: :love: :love:

    20% of the time, it works every time.
  • Ryandecheney314
    Ryandecheney314 Posts: 139 Member
    bump
  • tristan299
    tristan299 Posts: 2,537 Member
    How do you like your eggs in the morning, fertilized or not.
  • happysherri
    happysherri Posts: 1,360 Member
    Nice legs..... what time do they open? !!! (didn't work lol)
  • tristan299
    tristan299 Posts: 2,537 Member
    To a nice looking store worker.

    What time do you get off? (answer) Mind if i watch?
  • scrapalooza
    scrapalooza Posts: 335 Member
    You want to melt in my mouth or in my hand?
  • miss_jessiejane
    miss_jessiejane Posts: 2,819 Member
    I wish I was your derivative so I could lie tangent to your curves.
  • sixout
    sixout Posts: 3,128 Member
    I wish I was your derivative so I could lie tangent to your curves.

    Huygens’ favorite curves were cycloids, but my favorite curves are yours.
  • ew_david
    ew_david Posts: 3,473 Member
    Is it hot in here or is it just you?
  • Ryandecheney314
    Ryandecheney314 Posts: 139 Member
    Nice legs..... what time do they open? !!! (didn't work lol)

    How did this not work haha!
  • miss_jessiejane
    miss_jessiejane Posts: 2,819 Member
    Do you believe in love at first sight, or should I walk by again?
  • jackpotclown
    jackpotclown Posts: 3,275 Member
    Are you a beaver?? 'cause daaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaam!!!

    on a scale of 1 -10, you're a 9. I'm the 1 you need

    let's make like a fabric softener and snuggle

    \m/
  • catneon
    catneon Posts: 911 Member
    Hey I'm looking for treasure, can I look around your chest?

    The only STD I have is sexually transmitted desire…for you.

    As long as I have a face, you'll have a place to sit
  • sixout
    sixout Posts: 3,128 Member
    Hey baby, is your *kitten* from Iraq? Because I'd love for you to Bahgdad it up.
  • miss_jessiejane
    miss_jessiejane Posts: 2,819 Member
    Do you have a quarter? I'm supposed to call my mom when I find the woman of my dreams.
  • Jacwhite22
    Jacwhite22 Posts: 7,010 Member
    If girls were boogers I would totally pick you.
  • catneon
    catneon Posts: 911 Member
    My magic watch says you don't have any underwear on...
    Oh, you do?
    It must be 15 minutes fast
  • Jacwhite22
    Jacwhite22 Posts: 7,010 Member
    Do you work for UPS? I could have sworn I saw you checking out my package.
  • MiloBloom83
    MiloBloom83 Posts: 2,724 Member
    I hope you have a s-load of nickels, because this moustache ride is open all night long!
  • Jacwhite22
    Jacwhite22 Posts: 7,010 Member
    Can I read your t-shirt in braille?
  • Jacwhite22
    Jacwhite22 Posts: 7,010 Member
    What's the difference between a Ferrari and an erection? I don't have a Ferrari.
  • IPAkiller
    IPAkiller Posts: 711 Member
    "Hey pretty lady. I see you're all alone at the bar. Mind if I push your stool in?"
    jaylen-creepy-smile-o.gif
  • Jacwhite22
    Jacwhite22 Posts: 7,010 Member
    Are you the lottery lady on TV, because I'm picturing you holding up my balls.
  • Galatea_Stone
    Galatea_Stone Posts: 2,037 Member
    I'm Irish, wanna taste my lucky charms?
  • chocolate_totoro
    chocolate_totoro Posts: 827 Member
    Okay, this one is really bad...

    That suit is very becoming on you, then again if I was on you I'd be coming too.
  • Jacwhite22
    Jacwhite22 Posts: 7,010 Member
    Are you from Ireland? 'Cuz my ****'s-a-Dublin!
  • Jacwhite22
    Jacwhite22 Posts: 7,010 Member
    Want to spend the night at my house tonight? The couch may not pull out, but I do.
  • IPAkiller
    IPAkiller Posts: 711 Member
    "I put the STD in STUD, all I need is U..."
    1063153.gif
  • Jacwhite22
    Jacwhite22 Posts: 7,010 Member
    You wanna go out this weekend?
    [Sorry, I have a boyfriend]
    I have a math test tomorrow
    [What?]
    Oh, I thought we were talking about things we could both cheat on!
  • acpgee
    acpgee Posts: 7,962 Member
    Response to "Do you come here often?" at the bar or club. "Only during the mating season."

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