I know you're a tourist because ....

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Replies

  • Capt_Apollo
    Capt_Apollo Posts: 9,026 Member
    You have no idea what I mean when I tell you to drive past the Big Chicken.

    You have a stupid yankee accent.

    What accent you talkin bout? Fugghedaboutit!
  • spicy618
    spicy618 Posts: 2,114 Member
    All these pages and no one mentioned.

    ---- When you see teenagers hanging around their parents. :laugh:
  • ShibaEars
    ShibaEars Posts: 3,928 Member
    You are surprised when I dont end my sentences with "eh".
    You ask me where I can buy real maple syrup.
    You ask me if there are gas stations between here and Alaska, and then look annoyed when I say you dont even need any further north because the polar bears will give you a push when you need it.
    You ask if you should wear a sweater on the tour. Never mind the Georgian accent, you are a tourist from a long lineage of tourists if you're worried about getting a bit chilly underground on a 35*C day. It's not cold, it's refreshing!
    :laugh:

    - You are asking directions to "the West Edmonton Mall" - it's "West Ed", and I think most locals over 20 avoid it if they can
    - You're taking pictures of the pirate ship in the mall, or paying to watch the Sea Lion show
    - You are surprised you can't see the mountains
    - You think you can just hop on a train/subway and go anywhere outside of the city
    - You were expecting to see snow in July or August (it only happens SOMEtimes)
    - You are wearing pants/sweaters when it's 15C - heck, we bust out the shorts at around 0 lol
  • Shropshire1959
    Shropshire1959 Posts: 982 Member
    You try to tip in a pub .

    You order pints of BitterS

    You eat in McDonalds ... "gee you have them here too " ... unfortunately we do, yes

    You ask for French fries in a Fish and Chip shop

    You say "Quaint" ..... a lot..... actually a hell of a lot

    You try to buy London Bridge :-p ..... again

    You talk loudly and slowly in case WE don't understand English!

    You call the underground the TOOB

    You ask if I know the queen.

    You're too scared to drive on the CORRECT side of the road ... and if you do you have ZERO clue how to negotiate a roundabout.
  • mamaoftwins9197
    mamaoftwins9197 Posts: 142 Member
    You refer to it as anything other than downtown (Washington, DC).

    You ask if the Metro is safe.

    You've been on any kind of tourbus (other than in elementary school).

    You don't know that the numbered streets run north to south and the lettered streets run east to west.

    You don't know how to get to "the mall", Ben's Chili Bowl, the Cherry Blossoms, etc.

    You don't know that Marion Barry is the "mayor for life".
  • amwoidyla
    amwoidyla Posts: 257 Member
    You order cappuccino after an heavy dinner

    I'm not sure why this one makes someone a tourist. My husband always orders a cappuccino after dinner when we are out regardless of where it is.

    Because I'm italian
    Only tourists do that

    I'm not Italian but...expecting salad at the front end of the meal?
  • jasonmh630
    jasonmh630 Posts: 2,850 Member
    I know you're a tourist because...

    1) You have NO idea who The Civil Wars, Jason Isbell, or the Alabama Shakes are...

    2) You're baffled that not everyone drives a jacked up truck with a rebel flag decal on the back window (reference to southern stereotypes)

    3) You had no clue that Florence/Muscle Shoals has had a HUGE impact on American music in the 60's-70's and continues to.

    4) You're clueless as to what the line "Muscle Shoals has The Swampers" means in Lynyrd Skynyrd's song "Sweet Home Alabama".

    ETA: If you have never heard of white BBQ sauce before and where it originates. Seriously, that stuff is better than any other kind of BBQ sauce.
  • Shropshire1959
    Shropshire1959 Posts: 982 Member
    You call the main course of the meal the Entree ... eh? WTF?


    You try to tip EVERYONE and use a calculator to work it out exactly ....... Bwhaaaaaaaaaaaa
  • jasonmh630
    jasonmh630 Posts: 2,850 Member
    You think that Beale St. is a good place to be after dark.

    You think that Rendezvous has good barbeque.

    I'm not a local, but I think Central BBQ is better. I do think Rendezvous is decent too, though.
  • Phatgirl420
    Phatgirl420 Posts: 197 Member
    I live in Maryland, so I know you're a tourist when you visit the inner harbor, which to us locals is nothing but a nasty polluted swamp...

    When you order crab cakes from ANY restaurant you visit, just because you are in Md. so they must be all created equal, right?

    When you buy any and everything that has crabs on it (shirts, mugs, keychains, etc...)
  • dpwellman
    dpwellman Posts: 3,271 Member
    You're downtown between Church and Broadway on a Saturday mid-day. Or a Sunday. . . .
  • BigDaddyD72
    BigDaddyD72 Posts: 2,301 Member
    you are in another country and you get pissed at everyone for not understanding what you are talking about
  • dpwellman
    dpwellman Posts: 3,271 Member
    You ask what a cheese curd is
    If you have to ask. . .
  • SuperVixen2B
    SuperVixen2B Posts: 218 Member
    I live in Maryland, so I know you're a tourist when you visit the inner harbor, which to us locals is nothing but a nasty polluted swamp...

    When you order crab cakes from ANY restaurant you visit, just because you are in Md. so they must be all created equal, right?

    When you buy any and everything that has crabs on it (shirts, mugs, keychains, etc...)

    Whaaaaaaat? I love the Inner Harbor. I mean...yes, the "water" is the consistency of jello and smells like a dirty diaper, but the water taxi, and the bars, and the aquarium, and the shops...come on!

    I typically think someone must be from out of town if they try to engage me in conversation. Locals don't talk to strangers.
  • Phatgirl420
    Phatgirl420 Posts: 197 Member
    I live in Maryland, so I know you're a tourist when you visit the inner harbor, which to us locals is nothing but a nasty polluted swamp...

    When you order crab cakes from ANY restaurant you visit, just because you are in Md. so they must be all created equal, right?

    When you buy any and everything that has crabs on it (shirts, mugs, keychains, etc...)
    [/quote]

    Whaaaaaaat? I love the Inner Harbor. I mean...yes, the "water" is the consistency of jello and smells like a dirty diaper, but the water taxi, and the bars, and the aquarium, and the shops...come on!

    I typically think someone must be from out of town if they try to engage me in conversation. Locals don't talk to strangers.


    Do you live right in that area where the harbor is? I do, have all my life, and to us who live right there, it's nothing but a overpriced, tourist trap swamp full of yuppies, I mean come on, you just said it...jello like water that smells like a dirty diaper...can an aquarium and restaurants make that better? And why would anyone in their right mind want to take a water taxi thru that crap? I don't think so lol :-P
  • redwoodkestrel
    redwoodkestrel Posts: 339 Member
    It's summer in San Francisco (read: fog and brrrrrr!) and you're wearing shorts and a tank top and/or your child is swimming at Ocean Beach.

    You're eating clam chowder out of a sourdough bowl at Fisherman's Wharf when there are thousands of amazing and better restaurants nearby.

    You're on a segway tour and/or riding a ridiculous four/five/six person bike through Golden Gate Park, holding up all the traffic behind you.

    Depending on your age, you're either on an open-top bus taking photos of the fake hippie kids on Haight Street, or you're dressed up like a hippie kid walking down Haight Street.

    You're on the bus with me and ask me when it will get to Union Square, when we're clearly heading toward the beach... yeah, you're on the right line, but you got onto the bus going the opposite direction.

    You're asking me how to get to the Golden Gate Bridge/Lombard St./the Japanese Tea Garden/etc.
  • lngbrd
    lngbrd Posts: 279 Member
    You have Arizona plates
  • hei_ma_ma
    hei_ma_ma Posts: 61 Member
    You pull over to photograph the once-in-a-lifetime sight of a moose on the side of the highway.

    So true, so true...

    Also,

    - You've got giant bags under your eyes due to lack of sleep (the sun didn't set last night, or the night before, or the night before..).
    - It's raining and you've got an umbrella.
    - You can't figure out how to pronounce the place names that start with "kn."
    - You think a 50 lb fish is big!!!
  • kika_mckee
    kika_mckee Posts: 126 Member
    You ask what a cheese curd is
    If you have to ask. . .
    Cheese Curds...fresh Cheddar cheese in its natural, random shape and form before being processed into blocks and aged. Curds have a mild taste with a slightly rubbery texture and should squeak when eaten. *Note: Freshness may be lost 24 hours after opening package

    Deep-Fried Cheese Curds…a specialty of the Midwest where fresh curds are dipped in a beer-based batter before being placed in a deep fryer.

    Squeak…the trademark sound from a fresh cheese curd. Squeak should be high-pitched, audible with every bite and sound comparable to "balloons trying to neck," (The New York Times). *Note: Squeak may be lost 12 hours after opening package.
  • rjmudlax13
    rjmudlax13 Posts: 900 Member
    You're in Lower Manhattan on a weekend during summer.

    You're in Midtown Manhattan on a weekend (or any other day of the week).

    You're in Central Park on the weekend and not jogging.

    You're at an MTA ticket machine for 20+ minutes to buy a 1 ride ticket!!!!!!

    You ask me if you can get to Times Square on this train.

    You walk slower than me.

    You stop in the middle of the sidewalk to take a picture.
  • Peaceandwater
    Peaceandwater Posts: 23 Member
    In Winter.....You wear jeans and cotton socks under your ski pants, which are all tucked into your ski or snowboard boots, which are not laced correctly. You have a Go-Pro on your helmet and like, 10 or 12 lift tickets flapping from your zipper. You talk on your cell phone during the chair lift ride.


    In the Fall....You are driving erratically and pulling over at inconvenient spots to take pictures of the "foliage". You are wearing brand new Ben & Jerry's hoodies. Your kids have dried chocolate on their faces and furry teddy bear-shaped pins on their shirts. Your SUV does not have a speck of dirt on it.
  • gettinthere
    gettinthere Posts: 529 Member
    Your car is parked on the side of the highway while you get out of your car to take pictures of the momma bear and her babies (she will eat you)

    You wonder where our igloos are

    You are waiting for me to say "eh"

    You are amazed at how long it takes to drive from one town to the next

    You think that moose hang out in big groups
  • ThinLizzie0802
    ThinLizzie0802 Posts: 863 Member
    God, tourism and people trying new things/exploring new places/and learning new cultures is so awful.

    Jesus.
  • Falcon
    Falcon Posts: 853 Member
    You wonder where our igloos are

    That's a good one :laugh:


    You ask for directions to the 401 from the opposite side of the city
    You show up with skis, dressed in winter jackets, sweaters and pants in the middle of July wondering where the snow is
    You're amazed that we have colored money
    You think loonies are gold coins
  • blukitten
    blukitten Posts: 922 Member
    Ok havent read all of them but think this is awesome and hilarious so here it goes

    You drive super slow on EVERY road you are on

    You drive either an old car or a very nice car

    You are very pale- obviously from somewhere up north or east

    You are shopping for cleaning supplies and bug bombs

    You are crowding the streets and making traffic horrible!
    (oh wait, sorry these are all for "snowbirds")


    Ok- Tourists

    the look on your faces everytime you get out of a car, walk out of a restuarant or anywhere air conditioned
    (especially in the summer) like you think the temp is gonna change - even at night

    You are red- usually all over from a day shopping, or just being outside for a short time

    You are outside during the day- inside at night - again during summer

    You are not wearing a jacket or sweater in the winter when it is a chilly 75 degrees outside

    The obvious struggle you have taking a breath when you first get here and open the door in the summer- from the heat

    The lack of tan on your skin

    You are wearing shorts and sleeveless clothes in the winter
  • leannems
    leannems Posts: 516 Member
    You ask me the best place to watch the sunset
    You drive so slow in the thunderstorm
    You start frantically packing up your things at the beach when the afternoon thunderstorm begins (just wait 10 minutes)
    You put your hazard lights on in the thunderstorm WHILE you are still driving
    You get annoyed when you realize you can't drive onto all beach approaches
    You are sun burnt in the summer
    65 is not cold to you
    You want to know where to get the best seafood and are frustrated when I recommend sushi

    I love tourists though. But it is fun to spot them!
  • auntiebabs
    auntiebabs Posts: 1,754 Member
    You take up the width of the sidewalk, looking up, walking slowly, randomly stopping then starting again blocking other peoples way while they try to walk around you.

    You're a jerk... (see link)
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8LmPBPWHJu4
  • ChasingMyBliss
    ChasingMyBliss Posts: 803 Member
    you wear board shorts on a beach in Rio!
  • mantium999
    mantium999 Posts: 1,490 Member
    You don't understand why the streets dont all go north/south or east/west
    You find it funny that we call our "warshes" rivers
    You feel the need to touch every cactus you walk by
    You point to your menu because you cant say burrito
    You point out every person who is openly carrying a firearm
    You bought a pink cowboy hat
  • Missjulesdid
    Missjulesdid Posts: 1,444 Member
    God, tourism and people trying new things/exploring new places/and learning new cultures is so awful.

    Jesus.

    I was at a resort and heard a group of tourists complaining about the resort and stating that they would not return due to there being too many Arabs staying there. Yeah. you're visiting an ARAB country and complaining that there are too many ARABS around? Yeah, what a fabulous way to learn a new culture.