invisible to Visible. How's the attention you're getting?

muzichick

I totally agree with FTW.

I've gone from visible to invisible, I used to get abuse from kids in the street and people would look down at me when I was 321lb - nowadays I walk in the room and I don't even get a raised eyebrow, kids no longer shout abuse at me when I walk down the road, the only attention I get is the odd vehicle horn when walking, usually I'm wearing leggings and a Tshirt, listening to my headphones so I hardly notice it - but I do sometimes wave out to the driver lol

It's great, I love being "normal" I love being largely ignored, I love not getting noticed and yes I do get better service than I did when I was 321lb.... Also when I order food, I no longer get disgusted looks, which is great, I no longer have to feel guilty for eating in public..... IT'S FANTASTIC

xXx

And I completely agree with all of that. Nothing made me feel worse than knowing that someone took the time to roll their car window down in the winter, just to yell something at me. It once happened twice in one evening, within a distance of three blocks. It was -30 as well, so winding down your car window could be risky. It was very disheartening.

Meerataila

Question: invisible to Visible. How's the attention you're getting?

Answer: All coming from men about my dad's age, with unfortunate political leanings typical for that age group in the south. In other words, losing weight is so far not doing my love life a bit of good.

Mistraal1981

I have always loved fashion, but clothes never looked the way I wanted them to look when I was wearing them. Finding pretty clothes in my size was difficult. Its like manufacturers go, "Hmmmm, size 20, they must just want to wear black in order to hide. Don't be silly, size 20 doesn't need shape...round is their shape".

Now I am wearing the clothes I always wanted to and they look the way I imagined on me. (Still room for improvement but I'm no longer putting off wearing something as it still looks good). I recently bought this killer figure-hugging houndstooth pattern skirt that I wear with bright red 4 inch heeled pumps and a pretty black top and I feel like a 1950s sex siren.

To summarise, I have the confidence to wear head turning outfits. Heads are now turning, but I'd never be in the outfit in the first place if I didn't have the confidence.

seltzermint555

Actually, in my case, I feel I have gone from visible to invisible. As a 419 pound fat man, people visibly reacted with disgust whenever I walked into a room.

Now I've lost weight, I am passed over as a "normal" person. I am invisible, in the background. Nobody reacts to me at all.

IT'S GREAT!

FTW

I totally agree with FTW.

I've gone from visible to invisible, I used to get abuse from kids in the street and people would look down at me when I was 321lb - nowadays I walk in the room and I don't even get a raised eyebrow, kids no longer shout abuse at me when I walk down the road, the only attention I get is the odd vehicle horn when walking, usually I'm wearing leggings and a Tshirt, listening to my headphones so I hardly notice it - but I do sometimes wave out to the driver lol

It's great, I love being "normal" I love being largely ignored, I love not getting noticed and yes I do get better service than I did when I was 321lb.... Also when I order food, I no longer get disgusted looks, which is great, I no longer have to feel guilty for eating in public..... IT'S FANTASTIC

xXx

I agree with most all of the above but when it comes to ordering food, I now feel the opposite kind of judgment sometimes. The other night I took my mom out to a chain steakhouse and could feel the server totally mental eye-rolling me when I ordered double broccoli as my side item(s) for example. I live in an area where obesity and mass consumption of BBQ, fried food, etc, is looked upon as normal and I actually feel more judgment now when it comes to some of this stuff...kind of like I am being a poor sport by ordering something healthier. I think it has gotten a lot worse as I approach a healthy weight, because when I was at the beginning of my 134 lb loss people would give me a pity smile or even say "Ooooh you're being good!" and they seemed genuinely positive. Now I guess I'm becoming "normal" so it's annoying or obnoxious to get stuff from the light menu?!

smarieallen85

A big booty and small waist in my hood always got me attention. Nothing has really changed. Although the neighborhood harmless junkie did say "Damn girl you look so different. God bless you", the other day.

Lilly_the_Hillbilly

No matter what I weigh I'm always invisible.

MissMegannLee

As of lately, more guys have been noticing me. Which catches me off guard because A) I am not even CLOSE to my goal yet and Never really happened before. Like for example? Yesterday I was cleaning up after dinner and our neighbor had some of his guy friends over and one was on the porch and he screamed over to me "WHAT'S FOR DINNER?" I of course had NO clue he was speaking to me til my friend told me. So I told him. "Chili" and he was all. "Sounds really good." in which I replied "Oh it was, but it's vegetarian." and without missing a beat he said "Well..I have the salami." Then laughed "And said just playing with you."

And after that our neighbor was just...staring at me for like 5 minutes while I was washing dishes. (Weird..but whatever)

So I've gone kinda from not being noticed at all to being noticed now; helps my confidence as I really don't have any...at all.

xenu01

I think maybe my experience is strange, but what I've noticed is that while at almost 250 lbs I was kind of imposing (even at 5'4"), I am far less so at 199ish. Which means that people tend to feel far more comfortable getting all up in my space on public transit. I actually hate this. But! Happy about other things.

shapelyJ

Haven't had anyone notice but my aunt who said I look slim, not skinny, slim. Needless to say, I was pleased

Laura3BB

Well I get more attention too now - even after a moderate 20 pound loss only.
:-)

elizabethroyce10

I totally get what you are saying. I have found it to be true. When i was heavier/ I was overlooked by men and women in general. I lost about 30 lbs and i remember coming out of a store and realizing that people were looking at me again! I find it interesting that some people have had other experiences with being real large and being visible. I guess there are these lines... and when you cross them you become visible or invisible. It is all a very interesting experiment in social behavior to me. Personally I dont care who looks at me... I got over all that when i had big dreads. talk about another social experiment!

MagnumBurrito

Good for the most part, except when I don't want to be noticed.

RaggedyPond

Good for the most part, except when I don't want to be noticed.

This ^

The staring is starting to get old. I'm not a piece of meat.

seltzermint555

I think maybe my experience is strange, but what I've noticed is that while at almost 250 lbs I was kind of imposing (even at 5'4"), I am far less so at 199ish. Which means that people tend to feel far more comfortable getting all up in my space on public transit. I actually hate this. But! Happy about other things.

Same experience here...I spoke about it a little earlier in the thread. I was so used to kind of "claiming space" with my body and now I feel like I can't. It's so weird! I still feel "big" as a person in general, I am 5'8" 173 lb with long limbs but I feel like I can't save a seat next to me anymore or claim a circle of space in line at the post office...the person behind me will now stand like 10 inches from me instead of 2 feet away. People randomly touch me or get close to me too - not scary creepers, but say, the female clerk in a store where I'm shopping - and I am not used to that either.

marishka04

bump

tdpriss

Good advice.

spirit095

I do get comments that I'm looking slimmer, but I actually got a bit more attention (from guys) when I was at my starting weight (127lbs). I had a more butt and boobs at that time lol.

gopgirl425

I get a lot more looks and to be honest it makes me uncomfortable. I also feel more of a need to make myself look my best...but that is a me issue and has nothing to do with anyone else.

smarieallen85

No this makes sense. If I wear a maxi dress at Home Depot - I never have to hunt down someone to help me. And it's not always gentlemen, ladies help as well. Of course, this only works if you need paint or something. Wearing a dress to get lumber would be silly.

[/quote]

I wore yoga pants to home depot when I was about 155 and the manager gave me a 100 dollar discount on my air conditioner. He offered me a ride home too but I drew the line there.

muzichick

I think maybe my experience is strange, but what I've noticed is that while at almost 250 lbs I was kind of imposing (even at 5'4"), I am far less so at 199ish. Which means that people tend to feel far more comfortable getting all up in my space on public transit. I actually hate this. But! Happy about other things.

Same experience here...I spoke about it a little earlier in the thread. I was so used to kind of "claiming space" with my body and now I feel like I can't. It's so weird! I still feel "big" as a person in general, I am 5'8" 173 lb with long limbs but I feel like I can't save a seat next to me anymore or claim a circle of space in line at the post office...the person behind me will now stand like 10 inches from me instead of 2 feet away. People randomly touch me or get close to me too - not scary creepers, but say, the female clerk in a store where I'm shopping - and I am not used to that either.

I've noticed that lately too. There was a guy in line behind me at the coffee shop last week, and he just wouldn't back up, until I turned sideways and smiled at him. Then I think he got that he was totally in my personal space bubble.