Miserable about my weight & tears over photo
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It's painful to exercise when the weight is up. I hit 260# and it wasn't fun. But it can be done. For me it was cut out the carbs and get back on the bicycle. Ellipticals work well too. Anything low impact. I use MFP as a guide and I'm not glued to it all week but I do track what I eat. No pop, little starch, even giving up on beer. You can do it, stick with it, you'll be OK. Try to use exercise as a stress reliever, the endorphins from a good burn will make you feel better. Don't give up!0
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If you don't like what you see, change it! If you really want to change your appearance you can that's what I have to keep telling myself each day I am on this new journey. It's not easy but in the end all worth it! Don't give up!0
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Water aerobics are great for joint pain. It takes the weight off your joints and allows you to move with resistance. Its a great exercise and most gyms offer them if they have a pool. Some you can just pay for the classes, or even just buy a pass to a pool and work out on your own. its hard to find motivation when we are stressed out, but definitely making yourself get started is key. Even just 5 minutes is better than nothing! Keep going, and don't think you have to put up with bullying. If you need advice on that feel free to PM me as I can offer some friendly unbiased advice that may help you in dealing with the bullying.0
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I don't know if I ever hit the point you did, but I am constantly getting frustrated with my lack of will-power (when it comes to eating) and progress (with fat loss).
GET PISSED OFF!
Now, use that to motivate yourself. I won't say it's okay to be lazy, but if weight loss is what you're going for, 80% of the battle is diet. You're going to have to find some tricks (snack on raw veggies, drink tea instead of beer, eat fruit instead of candy bars, whatever) to eat under your calorie goal. Set realistic goals. Exercise when you can. Sometimes, slap yourself a little and force yourself to wake up early for a walk or a run, even if it's just once a week.
You CAN do this! It's just about forming good habits and staying consistent.
YOU CAN DO THIS!0 -
You can totally do this! I've been pretty nervous of people taking my picture lately too, but I 110% agree with everyone so far that has said to SAVE THAT PICTURE! When you do lose the weight (because I know you can) you are gonna have a killer transformation photo. Never forget where you started!
But hey, as far as motivation goes, we all have that problem sometimes. Especially if you've already started on your journey, it can get hard to keep going if you're not seeing results yet. That's why it's so important to keep a positive attitude and surround yourself with people who are going to SUPPORT you and BELIEVE in you. You never know, maybe you will end up being the inspiration to your husband in the near future if he can see your transformation
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IF you are ever wanting a friend in a similar situation... your looking at here. Just started almost a month ago 229.... Knee, feet back hurts all the time. Hate the way a feel. Don't want my Husband to touch me. Recently had family professional portraits taken, and I bawled when the proofs came back. I have lost 30 of the 60+ I need to lose before. I felt great! Then life happened and I gained it back plus. I am tired of being the fat girl. I know we are not suppose to care about superficial things, but I know I am not healthy. And I want to LOVE my life. All of it.0
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I was on here before at my highest weight (288.6) and lost 50 pounds. I was thrilled with the progress and what I was doing...then my world crumbled around me with losing my (pretty active) job, getting a new job that ended up being run by a scam artist, and grief from a death in the family. I gave up on my fitness and myself at that point - and I'm not making excuses, I have no one to blame but myself. I ended up gaining it all back plus another 5 pounds and absolutely hated myself for it.
So what did I do? I decided that I was going to take control and this time make it permanent. I cook at home most of the time now (try to make extras for leftovers so I don't have to cook as much during the week) and I walk at least 3 times a week, usually more. In the past month and a half I've lost 17 pounds and I'm so so proud of myself!
You can do it too! Turn the bullying and the feelings you get about that picture into motivation to do something about it. Feel free to add me if you'd like!0 -
A year from now you'll wish that you stuck to it. So stick to it and you won't have to regret it.
Trying and succeeding 5% of the time is better than not trying at all. It'll become easier and more habitual and that 5% will become 10%, 25%, 50%, etc. The difference is in realizing that you are human and will mess up sometimes, but you can just dust yourself off when you fail and move on.
You have two choices:
1. Give up (and regret it)
2. Keep trying (which will turn into success)0 -
Seeing that picture will indeed put it into perspective doesn't it. I hated my picture when I saw it. I mean, I could not believe that I looked like that. I must have been wearing rose-colored glasses because there is no way that I looked like that. I guess what we see in the mirror and what shows in the photograph is WAY WAY different. But don't worry, you will take another picture and see just how different you will look soon enough.
Please don't give up and quit. If you ever need someone to chat with, don't hesitate to drop a line. Always willing to lend a supporting hand when we need one. Or heck, just a shoulder to vent on.0 -
Hi Amy,
You just have to start. You don't have to follow some big life changing plan or perfectly work out every bite of food you will eat for the next month. Just start where you are today, because you are a human being who deserves some self love.
I have been depressed over my weight, and in a place where no small amount of change seemed possible. But if today you can dust off an old exercise dvd, or go for a 15 minute walk, or open a bag of salad and throw some chicken breast on top for dinner then you have started.
Just do the teensiest thing for yourself today. Accept some of the outpouring of love and advice that your post has brought to you, because we have ALL been exactly where you are today. I weighed 248 pounds this morning, but I got up and did a cardio dvd for 30 minutes and drank a protein shake for breakfast. You can do this for yourself and keep reaching out and telling your story because helping each other along this journey is a little good karma for each one of us.
Melaina0 -
Like the others, I feel your pain. I am in a similar situation myself, right now, but I actually feel really positive about where I am *this minute* and where I feel I am going.
I've used MFP before, with some success. The biggest problem for me is sticking to it! I am just now coming back after 9 months away with even more weight to lose than I did in the very beginning. One month ago, I didn't know how to begin -- to jump back on the treadmill after wallowing in my own laziness (and tasty snacks) seemed like mission impossible.
But I did it... and you can, too. I walked/jogged on the treadmill for 30 minutes 3 days of that first week. The second week, I did the same, but started adding incline. I really need to remember how AMAZING I feel after a great workout, and to not forget it on those days when I feel like I'll always be fat so there's no point in even trying...
I know there's a point to all of this. I see it each and every day on MFP when average, ordinary, just-like-me people post stunning results of what they did after signing up here. I can do it, too. I know I can. The question is... will I? I've totally become that person who posts motivational words and images all over my work out den, and one of my favourites is: "If you're tired of starting over, stop giving up."
Oh, and my knees hurt like a *****. My back is cranky with me, too. I'm trying to take it easy on my out of shape body while not so easy as to let it be a convenient excuse to quit (again). I figure it's only natural for my body to be hurting right now -- it's not used to all the exercise. It sucks a little at first, but I find that the pain is much (much) less once I've warmed my muscles/joints up a bit, which is all the more reason to stay active. I'm going to pick up some glucosamine supplements at the drug store -- I know lots of folks who have used it for bad knees/hips/ankles/etc, so I'm anxious to give it a try.
Don't quit on yourself... admitting failure is just the first step in recovery. It gets easier, I promise!
Feel free to add me for support/cheerleading if you like 0 -
Let today be the first day that you drop the excuses. All of them.
I second this. It sounds like a lot of excuses really. Sorry.
You have to want this enough to do whatever it takes. It's not enough to just want the "after", you have to be willing to put in the work. Maybe it might even take some of your stress away when you start losing weight and gaining control. It helps me to feel like I have some control over my life which I generally feel I am just a passenger on this ride.
No one likes exercising at first. Some people never do. Just do it. If you can't make yourself exercise right now then just start with controlling your intake. If you find that you are eating out too much because you are "too lazy" to cook or don't have the time than see about meal prep once a week or once a month. Some meals you can have complete meals ready that just need to be popped in the oven. You do all the work on one day and have food for the whole week. There are tons and tons of recipes that you can find online.
Make this a priority, don't give yourself any room for excuses or getting out of it for one month. Commit totally. Exercise as much as you can. Stay at your calorie goal. See how you feel in one month and the weight you have lost and you will feel a new commitment to it.0 -
Your post made me cry this morning because the same thing just happened to me yesterday. A friend posted a picture on Facebook of me without asking and it horrified me. I couldn't sleep last night because i felt so ashamed and embarrassed and hopeless. I have tried about 20 diets in the past five years and I've failed every time.
I know I am not doing much in the way of encouragement right now simply because I'm in the same boat. But maybe it will help to know that there are others going through the same thing. I joined MFP yesterday - again- and synched my new fitbit device to it. If your knees and ankles hurt, maybe try non weight bearing exercises for a while like swimming or cycling. Spinning is really awesome, fun, and effective, and you'll feel great at the end of the class.
I am now looking at the FB post as the supreme motivation and one day i'll thank my friend for posting it and motivating me to make changes! I am going to take it one day at a time. We can do this.0 -
I weighed 248 pounds this morning, but I got up and did a cardio dvd for 30 minutes and drank a protein shake for breakfast.
YES!!! I love this!!! I'm gonna be draggin' my 220 pound *kitten* all over the treadmill tonight, and I'm gonna do it like a rockstar!
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Let me call a Whambulance! You sound so much like me 20 pounds ago. You can't control your husband! Don't give up!0
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Let today be the first day that you drop the excuses. All of them.
This^^ If you want it bad enough, you WILL make it happen.0 -
I weighed 248 pounds this morning, but I got up and did a cardio dvd for 30 minutes and drank a protein shake for breakfast.
YES!!! I love this!!! I'm gonna be draggin' my 220 pound *kitten* all over the treadmill tonight, and I'm gonna do it like a rockstar!
Like a rockstar, I love it. When I get home I am going to take my dogs out, once we get outside they will drag my *kitten* around
the villiage. I have texted my hubby just now so he can either come with me or see me later x0 -
As far as your food intake is concerned: try to cook one day a week - Saturday, Sunday - then freeze enough meals to feed both, you and your husband for the entire week. You'll eat much healthier, you'll see your energy level go up, your weight go down slowly but steadily. And that's a great motivator. Don't give up!0
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when Life goes insane and everything else is faling or thriving and things seem just to hectic and out of control." Make your self important a priority"
The one thing you can control is yourself, your food your mouth your looks and your wellbeing. So no matter what, when you want to gain control, just do it...because if your cant control your self ....your probably arent controlling much else... take the lead and dont look back when you are more focused on your wellbeing everything else seems more clearer, life is easier.
take a big look at that picture and tell your self never again will I feel or look this way and just start a routine and dont look back.
take away your tempation until your strong enough to make rational decisions, start taking a walk every day even for 30-45 mins taking it a "me time" ....I use excersize as a stress reliever...because Im always stressed.
just a few tips....some days I have to remind my self of this^ because I am important, and so are you....
Good Luck on your journey : ) AND HAVE FUN WITH IT0 -
I go to a pain clinic, and am getting shots in my hip later today. The doctor also told me that I'll be getting some in my lower spine at my next visit. I've managed to lose 18 pounds so far by just watching what I eat. I'm praying that once I've had the shots, I'll be able to start walking and doing crunches again. I know that losing weight will take stress off my joints, and I'm determined to succeed at this.
I'd be more than happy to help you stay motivated! Feel free to send a friend request if you'd like. We all need support on this journey.
Thank you hun. Am sorry to hear you are in so much pain. My mum has MS and arthritis and she goes to the pain clinic regularly. She has found that huge doses of Q10 and also St. John's Wort help to some degree. The Q10 (it's a pretty high dose, will check for you) sounds silly but when she stops taking it she gets even worse so she knows it works for her and takes it every day. Will send you an Add. Thanks again x0 -
You can do it!!!
also be careful what you post on here.
i have noticed some people can be quite nasty
don't give up.
Thanks hun0 -
That's awesome, amylouize!!! Good for you!!! I bet he'll end up tagging along. Maybe not tonight, but eventually. Men hate to be left out of what looks like a good time 0
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Just take one day at a time and try to stay focused, the only person you have to try and keep on track is yourself! you keep making the wrong decisions but your letting yourself do that so give yourself that push you deserve
Each day I try to do one thing but I never stick to it. I need a huge overhaul, this pic serves me right. I should probably upload it, it's awful though.0 -
The same thing pushed me to take this seriously. I've always been overweight so it became just who I am to me and everyone else. I never really tried to do anything about it, that was just too hard. About 8 years ago we had some family issues that completely altered my world. I let the stress get to me and became less and less active. Slowly over that time I gained over 30 lbs and took me to the point of almost hitting 300 lbs! But when I'd look in the mirror, I didn't see it. My friends and family would tell me I dressed well, and carried myself well. I had just resigned myself to always being the big girl and at least I looked OK. Then 1 day I saw a picture and thought, wow, is that me? Then I walked by a mirror and saw myself for the first time in ages. I was shocked and so unhappy. I sat down with my husband and said I have to do this. I immediately started walking and went to the grocery store and bought some healthy food choices. I started on MFP again and took in serious. Suddenly, I had something I was in control of. My family, work, kids, husband. . . all the stress in my world was uncontrollable, but this I could control. My husband said he'd work out with me and he has, though he's lost his motivation lately. I still have mine though after 6 weeks (a record for me) and have started telling him that if he doesn't want to do it, that's fine I'll do it myself. I've started to lose weight and am felling better in general. I can walk up a flight of stairs now and not be out of breath. I can walk 3 miles and feel good and loose, not sore. It's AMAZING, and makes handling the stress I used as a barrier in the past a little easier to handle.
It's hard work though and I completely understand how life can be overwhelming and make this process seem like a chore. It took me years of start and stop before I stuck with it. I'm still at the beginning and it's daunting I know. You can definitely do this, I know you can! It's a wonderful thing that you see what your obstacles are and you are seeing what needs to be done. It doesn't make it any easier, it just shows your getting ready to really dig into this journey. I hope you can stick with it. I'm rooting for you because I know you'll be amazing at this.0 -
Sounds like you've hit "rock bottom". This is actually a good thing. Let me explain:
I was in your shoes at about the same time in my life. I was 230lbs, had a heart condition and was on anxiety medication. I was absolutely miserable and everything in my life was suffering because of it. Then I was diagnosed with POF (infertility) and thyroid cancer, within the same year. I thought my world was ending. I was depressed. My marriage was rocky. I don't know what happened, but at some point I got angry and decided enough was enough - I hit rock bottom. This anger is what fueled me for 18 months and I struggled, cried, made excuses, got back up, and eventually lost 90lbs.
Fast forward to today. I'm back here to lose my baby weight (yay for science and miracles!), am no longer on heart medication, and have been cancer free for 9 years. My marriage is back on track and my anxiety is under control (as long as I keep active). This is all as a result of getting my health in order. I took back control.
Point? I know it seems insurmountable right now. My advice is is to take that anger, depression, disgust, loathing, and use it to your advantage. Tell the fat to eff off. Get angry about it. Punch a pillow. Join martial arts so you can kick the crap out of stuff (that's what I did and I tell ya, it's cheaper than therapy). This is hard, we all know that. You will stumble but you have the strength to get back up and try again. Every small victory should be celebrated. Use MFP to keep you accountable and for moral support. You got this.0 -
If your knees and ankles hurt, what about swimming? or yoga? I find both are very helpful when I'm stressed out - even if it's just giving me 'me time' away from that situation.
It is possible to lose weight without exercising, you just have to keep going and keep re-motivating yourself. Find small victoires to be proud of and small easily acheivable goals to aim for - and don't forget to celebrate when you reach them! (but not with food!)
Thanks hun, swimming is excellent, but I don't want to have to pour my fat self into a swimsuit........ but if I don't nothing will change. I went to the gym early one saturday morning and thought the pool would be empty, but no, I guess eveyone else had the same idea. I just need to get overmyself I guess. It's mortifying though.
Celebrating with food is something I tend to do as well. I was off work for a week and got loads done in the house (painting etc.) but then I let myself eat junk because I was working hard, such a waste of cals burnt.0 -
Don't give up. Your starting weight is 1 lb lighter than my current weight, and I've managed to come this far.
Here's the thing, everybody has stress and thing they could better be using their time for than logging calories, but if it's something you are serious about and really want to change, you'll find the time to do it. Download the app to your phone if you have a smart phone. That makes it so much easier to log when you aren't at home. It you don't have a smart phone just keep your receipts and log based on that.
When you're eating at home make logging easier on yourself. Scoop everything you plan on eating into a measuring cup before putting it on your plate if you don't have a food scale. If you can, try to eat just the suggested serving size from the box/package since that's usually one of the options available when logging on MFP.
There will ALWAYS be reason you can't log or can't find time to log. Life may be extra stressful right now, but there will always be stress, and there will always be a reason to give up. You have to find the motivation to keep going on your own. I suggest grabbing a sheet of paper and writing down in short 1 line sentence fragments the reason WHY you want to lose weight. Write down how seeing that picture made you feel. Make a copy and place it in your pantry and put one wrapped around your debit card. It will serve as a reminder when you go to eat of what your goals are until you are able to restrain yourself from over indulging.
The most important thing is to find friends on here. I didn't realize just how much having other people on here helps until I made the friends that I did. They give me a reason to log in when I don't feel like it.0 -
5) Alternating who cooks, BUT the other person is present in the kitchen (we've put one of the dining chairs in there) and even helps out with small jobs, gives the occasional stir etc. I'm lucky hubby is actually the better cook, but both of us often feel tired and stressed and don't want to go into the kitchen on our own to cook (or even just prepare the veg on a lazier day). With both of us in the kitchen generally one of us is less stressed than the other and takes the turn to cook, while we chat. The chatting helps relieve stress and by the time we've been there a few minutes the other person often feels up to giving a hand.
Thank you for your support hun, I especially love the bit I quoted above because hubby and I used to ndo this all of the time. He and I really need to have a heart to heart when I get home. I really need to kicdk myself in the behind but I also really need his support.0 -
Amy Louise,
The first thing to say is well done on being honest and open about how you feel - this is really hard to do sometimes.
Also, thanks for reaching out to the community, it's good to see that there are people who can offer you a lot of great advice here.
I am a batch-maker, on the odd weekend I will stick on some music and spend the day in the kitchen making healthy meals that I can chuck in the freezer.
Thanks hun. You are right, the people on here are awesome. I am so glad I did reach out because I was so close to quitting.
I love the batch making idea, I am going shopping with hubby on Thursday evening so I will get some containers for the freezer. What kind of food do you make? So far I know I wasnt to make shepards pie and a good Irish Stew (my favouite).0 -
Also, as someone who was too big to exercise properly maybe these will help you. These are the exercises I did until I could exercise correctly, and I still do them when I'm feeling sore:
Start with stretching. Sit down with your legs out to both sides in a V shape. Reach for one knee/foot at a time and then reach out in the center in front of you. Go until you feel it starting to pull and then hold it for about 10 seconds before releasing. Sitting with your legs apart leaves room for your tummy where having you legs together your tummy might get in the way before you got a good stretch.
Do "super cheater push-ups" I still can't do real push-ups or girly push-ups. Stand in front of a wall and put your hands on the wall shoulder width apart. Lean into the wall until the tip of your nose touches. Push yourself away from the wall with your arms and then slowly lean yourself back towards the wall.
In place of doing sit-ups sit on the edge of the bed, and slowly lean back into what would be a laying down position. When you get to the point where you start "shaking" and have to clench your tummy to stay up hold it for 10 seconds before laying down. It works the same muscles but is easier for people who have a hard time laying down on the floor or have too much tummy for a traditional sit-up.
Stand behind a couch or in front of your kitchen counter and hold on to it for balance. Stand with your feet shoulder width apart with your feet pointed outwards. This position is also Ballet 2nd position if you need to look up a picture. Bend your knees, slowly lowering until you feel the stretch in your legs, or your heels are trying to come off the floor, then slowly come back up.
These helped me a lot and I still do them a few times a month. Best of all they cost nothing to do. I hope this works for you and anyone else who needs them.
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