Weird looks and questions when I explain how I lost weight

marsellient

I had one of those conversations just yesterday! The words carbohydrates and metabolism were mentioned several times, along with "but I'm a vegetarian, I go to the gym three times a week, I walk every day", etc., etc. The person really didn't want to hear about calories in, calories out.
People either get it or they don't. At this point I cannot remember how many times I've told someone abut MFP and been told that that doesn't work for that person; however, just look at a magazine or newspaper, bookstore or even the television or Internet ads (some of which are on this website). We are inundated with the quick fix. Weight loss is a huge industry, and it would fizzle if everyone came here!

knitapeace

I sometimes play up the "keeping a diary" aspect, because people really do seem to need some sort of magic bullet that's more than just "eat less move more." I feel like I'm giving them that by telling them measuring and recording everything kept me on track. Unfortunately I think what a lot of people really want is the magic bullet that takes no effort on their part...and while my weight loss was simple in terms of what tools I used, it really was hard work to remain consistent and jump back up every time I fell. As I put in my profile quote: "Losing weight is easy math and hard work."

njmark72

Honestly, now I just say diet and exercise unless it is someone who really seems like they want to seriously change their life the way I did. I have spent too much time in the past with people, explaining the intricate details of my diet and exercise routine only for them to say something like, but I like to drink a couple of beers a night or, nah, I can't give up eating ice cream.

So now, it's just diet and exercise...

Mark

Unknown

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Anonycatgirl

sometimes i make up stuff like the cat food diet etc just because they dont want to hear they have to eat right and exercise

+1!!!

MinnieInMaine

I usually said "I did it the old fashioned way - eating less and exercising". Sometimes they just say "oh good for you" but most of the time I get that strange look.

The best one was about 3 years ago, I went to a happy hour with a bunch of former co-workers and everyone complimented me and later the conversation went back to asking how I did it. So I told them I started in WW and then found this great website. There was a hint of that strange look but they at least feigned interest so I told them I'd email the link to them the next day and offered my help if they needed it. After I sent my emails, I never heard a peep back.

As a lot of the previous replies have pointed out - I think most people just aren't ready to make that commitment and are hoping you'll tell them about some magic pill or shake or something.

sinker59

Wait a minute, I'm taking notes. So if I understand you correctly, you're saying 'Eat less and exercise more.' Sounds crazy to me!!

jennnnn2u

I've not lost 100lbs, but just last week a family friend asked me how I was losing weight. She got a weird look when I told her I was just watching what I eat and started exercising, and mentioned MFP. I don't think it was that she didn't believe me, but rather disappointment that it wasn't some magic solution that would instantly solve all of her weight problems too.

I think you hit the nail on the head here.

RestlessWorld

I tell them I downloaded an app on my phone. It is fun to see the reaction. What app? How much? Do you just leave the phone in your pocket all day and it causes you to lose weight?

BigLifter10

Turns out the answer is simply: Discipline.

oneloopygirl

The best thing is when you give them the explanation and they tell you how that doesn't work for them :laugh:

THIS!!!!

So many people want a quick fix. There isn't one, but they keep thinking there will come along some magic pill that will allow them to eat whatever they want whenever they want to excess and still lose weight... Sigh...

oneloopygirl

I tell them I downloaded an app on my phone. It is fun to see the reaction. What app? How much? Do you just leave the phone in your pocket all day and it causes you to lose weight?

HAHA... They are imagining how the fat is magically sucked out by the phone

REDUX_o01

Fat-powered cellphones! That would solve all batteries and recharging problems in the world.

levitateme

I've not lost 100lbs, but just last week a family friend asked me how I was losing weight. She got a weird look when I told her I was just watching what I eat and started exercising, and mentioned MFP. I don't think it was that she didn't believe me, but rather disappointment that it wasn't some magic solution that would instantly solve all of her weight problems too.

I think you hit the nail on the head here.

Yep. Everyone wants to imagine you did something that required little to no effort and when they find out it is the exact opposite they are disappointed. It may also be a little bit of self reflection on their part. "Am I really just eating way too much? Is that why I'm overweight?" Yes. I have a friend who sadly tells me she can't do what I'm doing and that she really doesn't eat that much so she doesn't understand why she's overweight. I mentally calculate what she's eating sometimes and she clears 1500 calories by lunch and is completely sedentary.

baiye1

Confession time ... If I can't be bothered answering and I don't really know the person I adopt a rather sad demeanour and say in hushed tones "I've been unwell" That makes them feel better that I've list weight with extra 'help' and stops the questions ;-p

OMG, this cracked me up! I'll have to keep that in mind, because they really don't like hearing that I lost it by EAT BETTER, MOVE MORE. Maybe I'll start calling it the EBMM Diet. People always like "diets."

On that note, my mother has also joined the MFP wagon and has had success as well. And it really is just all EAT BETTER, MOVE MORE. No one ever wants to believe that though.

UK34

Alot of people are lazy and just want everything handed to them on a plate in this world.

At work, I used to get all the "Oh what's the matter with you, it's only a piece of cake" rubbish. I work in an office with a lot of people and it is someone's birthday nearly every week, so even when I'm maintaining I don't have a peice at every birthday!

I never once got a "you look great" or "well done for loosing" I know it was all jelousy, because ALL of them need to loose weight and they know it, but keep trying the same old weight watchers thing, spending hundreds of pounds on their products, some of which are proven to be a con.Suprise suprise, none of them have worked. Because their failure is they cheat, and then winge about how fat they are. (sick of hearing it I really am)
Yes I know some people are successful on Weight watchers diets, but seriously, if they have the right mind set, then they could of done the same thing on normal food for half the price and their own set of scales. But I guess that some people are not that strong and need a big helping hand all the way. So whatever, up to them.

I think it's like quitting smoking, if you are not ready and dedicated in your mind, nothing will ever work.
I have offered all of them help and showed them MFP, but guess they are not interested.

The thing that bugs me, is I feel bad now when I say "No thanks, I need to loose a few pounds before my hols, because my fav clothes feel a little tight and I won't be happy in my bikini" because the look I get is just evil.

Why should I feel bad for sitting there day after day, month after month with them waiving food under my nose and making me feel like an outcast for not stuffing my face all day long, like them. I worked bloody hard, with no help at all. (apart from my husband working out exercise routines for me and being really supportive )

I am truly an obese person trapped in a slim persons body now, I loooove food, I love talking about food, I love cooking and I love eating. I really look forward to meal times, sad I know...but it does mean every day requires willpower.

Sorry. went off on a bit of a tangent there!

InstantCoffee100

I don't think it was that she didn't believe me, but rather disappointment that it wasn't some magic solution that would instantly solve all of her weight problems too.

^ I think this is a big one. "Eating less and exercising" may be the tried-and-tested strategy, but it is literally the least sexy answer to the question of weight loss.

So true. You can try to dress it up in witty banter but the hard truth is that exercise and caloric control is the base of what humans need to be healthy.

HerbertNenenger

I always say that I have no secrets, it's just eating less and moving more, nothing new ! And then, like you, they look at me like they're waiting for me to confess I had lap band surgery. tant pis.

kmbrooks15

Try making a 16 year old with the mind of a 7 year old (my son with developmental delays) understand why his high cholesterol numbers mean he needs to eat better and exercise. I started him on an exercise program (he's always been slim but his medication made him gain a little bit). After the first workout, he said, "Why isn't my tummy gone?" Son, if all it took was one workout, NOBODY would be fat!

Alidecker

I got that all the time...when my response to the "how did you lose weight?" was I ate less and moved more. Some people would lose interest. They wanted to hear that I did it on a fad diet or took a miracle drug. They don't want to hear that I worked for it. What gets me now, is that after 5 years, people ask me when I am going to stop dieting.

doctorregenerated

As someone who has asked others about their secret and gotten responses that varied (clean eating, weight watchers, atkins) I can tell you what the look probably means. They are genuinely curious, they get the answer, and then in a moment they determine that in order to get what you have, they'd have to change their eating and fitness lifestyle. The disappointed look will happen no matter what diet/method you tell them because they are disappointed that they would have to change what they currently do to get thin.

free1220

Sometimes people will think you are hiding a sickness that is making you lose weight...but I agree that eating less in itself will let you lose plenty over time.I started to walk too,not real far...maybe 1 mile every day.That is when I noticed the scale moving but it took weeks/months.

jonmscharff

This is pretty common, actually. So many people have been conditioned to hear that you've done it with {name of fad diet plan or nutritional system here}. I get the same thing. It usually ends with a puzzled ... "so, you've done it all on your own?" Yes, I just eat sensibly, track my calories carefully, and exercise a lot. Sometimes I follow up with "I wasn't doing that before." Huh.

I don't explain beyond that. If they don't get it, if they don't want to get it, that's their problem. Conversation over.

This. We all have a desire to help others and we all know that this has been a journey...some of it difficult, some of it not so much. That is why we fall into the trap of explaining the simplicity of what we are actually doing. Without sounding harsh...there are just a lot of lazy people out there. I know I was when it came to eating and exercise for quite a while in my life. I have corrected this and I am well on my way to getting where I want to be. But, in our society it is somehow wrong or not politically correct to tell people that they are being lazy and eating too much crap. Or generally not being responsible for oneself. So the diet industry capitalizes on this in a multi billion dollar industry which is prevalent in our society. It tells them that its not you, its something else...and THEY are to blame...just take our pill, our powder, our pre made meals, our workout gadget, and on an on. When we know that it is much much simpler than that. The problem is that there is no money to be made using this site, or eating well, or exercising.

I am not a conspiracy theorist or extremest, but I believe this is just an example of our society and mass media feeding us a lot of crap. Most people are happy to just follow along with what they are told even though if you take a step back and look at it rationally you would never come to that opinion on your own. Again no one wants to say, "Really, that doesn't make sense." It seems to not be allowed in our society to hold people accountable for their own actions. There always has to be another reason...in this case, it can't just be that we are eating too much, or the wrong things, and not exercising.

Let's take control of our own lives and hold ourselves and others accountable for their actions! Now that would be a revolution...

Congratulations to you for being responsible and taking control of this part of your life! That's another wonderful thing that you can teach your students. I thank you for being a positive roll model in this regard. Good luck on your journey!

Lonestar5775

Most people do not expect that others have any more will power than they do and so the honest answer is not what they are looking for. I've had people start the conversation by asking if I have been sick since I have dropped some weight. They really don't want to believe getting healthier is within their ability.

sphkhn

I know! My mom kept telling me she didn't want to ruin my diet when I was home. And I said I'm not on a diet I can eat pasta/sushi/thai food in moderation. She kept saying it at every meal. But on the flip side I inspired her to start working out because even though she is 135 and I'm 160 I have way more strength and more defined muscles. And my co workers ask me all the time if I juice fast ect. and I say no and explain it is unhealthy and they don't get it.

azymth99

Its funny how people are always surprised that counting calories and exercising works.

Its like they expect the answer to be something else. Like you're going to say "I found a lamp on the beach, rubbed it 3 times and this genie popped out!"

Everyone knows that limiting calorie intake is how you lose weight- yet no one wants to believe it when you tell them that's how you did it. I've found that when people notice my weight loss and I tell them how I dropped almost 20 pounds they want to give me some BS advice- like "You should try that South Beach Diet- that'll make you lose tons of weight." And this is usually coming from someone that is very out of shape, yet contends that they know the secrets to weight-loss, and just chooses not to practice them.

UK34

It's because they want to tell you that there was an easier way you could of done it. Pathetic huh.

bostonwolf

Now that summer is coming to an end and I am returning to work (I am a teacher), more and more people seem to be noticing my weight loss (strange in itself because I had lost 90% of my weight before summer break but maybe its the new wardrobe or tanned skin) and are asking what I did?

I keep it brief and say "honestly I just got control over my eating and keep my calories below 2000". I'll mention that I use MFP to log everything, and occasionally workout and try to get some cardio a few times a week.

People seem to expect something more radical. I get all kinds of strange looks like I'm holding something back or something..

How do you guys explain it to people? Do you notice the same thing or is it just me? It seems they want to know a secret or something, and are disappointed that I don't have something more profound to say. I would really like to hear from those of you that lost a lot of weight. My weight loss wasn't dramatic and some people don't even notice it. Dying to know how someone who lost 100 lbs by counting calories feels about the reactions people have to their explanation of how they did it.

You probably gave them more of an explanation than I would. Just say "it wasn't hard. I took control of what I eat and drink and I made sure I started moving around more and working out, and I tracked both to make sure the numbers were what I thought they were."

Of course, this will make some folks mad because they want to be told you took a pill or got sick. Anything that does NOT imply that we have total control over our weight.

D_squareG

I've not lost 100lbs, but just last week a family friend asked me how I was losing weight. She got a weird look when I told her I was just watching what I eat and started exercising, and mentioned MFP. I don't think it was that she didn't believe me, but rather disappointment that it wasn't some magic solution that would instantly solve all of her weight problems too.

^^this. I think they were hoping it was a pill, shake , detox or something.

maram29

I'm quoting a fellow MFP friend here...working on what I eat, and what I do, EVERY DAMN' DAY!