Body Image

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  • randomtai
    randomtai Posts: 9,003 Member
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    Lol wut? :huh: :huh:

    Race has nothing to do with my goals, and I am a mixed woman.

    id suggest shes saying that the different main stream body images projected by society and media are different depending on what side of her family/friends are talking to her. One side telling her shes too skinny, the other too fat.

    Just what i am reading between the lines

    *shrug* I guess. My race never played a factor in my weight loss nor my perception. :ohwell:
  • stackhsc
    stackhsc Posts: 439 Member
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    youve never had someone tell you that some part of your body didnt fit some stereotype? no *kitten*, too big an *kitten*.... even if they didnt say it you never felt societal pressures to change the look of your body due to some preconceived notion of what sexy is? or what looks good to others?
    some people are more sensitive to weight related comments than others too. It never really bothered me much if someone said i was overweight when i was, it more bothered me when people thought i was sick or lost too much weight when i was still at 215 lbs......
  • randomtai
    randomtai Posts: 9,003 Member
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    youve never had someone tell you that some part of your body didnt fit some stereotype? no *kitten*, too big an *kitten*.... even if they didnt say it you never felt societal pressures to change the look of your body due to some preconceived notion of what sexy is? or what looks good to others?
    some people are more sensitive to weight related comments than others too. It never really bothered me much if someone said i was overweight when i was, it more bothered me when people thought i was sick or lost too much weight when i was still at 215 lbs......

    Nope.
  • stackhsc
    stackhsc Posts: 439 Member
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    ok, so why do you want to lose weight?
  • Joannah700
    Joannah700 Posts: 2,665 Member
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    Us woman cannot win. Our body images are all over the place or at least mine is. I am mixed. I am Mexican and White. So in the Mexican culture I am too skinny/not enough meat and curves. Then on the white side I am on the thick/borderline chunky side. So I have nonstop body image issue’s. I think almost allllll woman do. I think the skinny girls are starting to feel a bit of out pain with this new pop culture trend of having a “fat A**” . When I heard/saw the video Anaconda I thought to myself “oh great something to add to my list”!!

    This makes me wonder – do others have my same issue? Are you a mixed race and notice a huge body image difference? Also, Men - do you have body image issues or are the woman alone in this matter? What is your body image issue?

    I'm Mexican and white. I never had any issues with body image. Fat, I owned it. Fit, I owned that too.

    I've had very few comments made about my bodyshape at all stages (pregnancy excluded), and I think it largely has to do with how I present it. I dress well for my body type, and I walk tall and confident. Even the rare negative comments I've received have had nothing to do with with my ethnicity.

    The only problems I had with being mixed occurred in junior high, and it was more of a cultural issue than anything else.

    ^^^^ Pretty much this. I'm Irish and Hispanic and have always moved with confidence in my own skin.

    I liked it when I was 150 lbs - I had boobs! I like it now that I'm 135 lbs, I can wear pencil skirts without looking like a Kardashian. I got compliments whatever my body size and the only negative remark I ever recall getting was (after losing 10 lbs) my ex said 'Wow, you got up to 150?'. :grumble, grumble, rude man:

    People would make remarks about how wide my hips were growing up - but I never attributed that as a bad thing. Just...hips.

    I grew up in a really mixed neighborhood and it seemed people came in all sizes - I really don't remember having any pressure about a preference in any shape or size growing up.
  • mccindy72
    mccindy72 Posts: 7,001 Member
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    ok, so why do you want to lose weight?

    Maybe she doesn't. Why do you assume everyone on this site wants to lose weight? I'm not on it to lose weight, I'm on it to make sure I keep weight on.
  • mswoodsy
    mswoodsy Posts: 91 Member
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    even when i was 115-118 lbs i still had a big ol' booty behind me, and thats when thin was "in".
    i rocked it :)
    never had a reason not to, i was healthy (although could have definitely used more muscle).

    i didnt have body image issue until i was truly overweight. and even that was because I, PERSONALLY, felt wrong about it. it wasnt that others would think i was fat, I DID. and that was a problem. the only person that should have any say in the matter is you because its your body. easier said than done, i know, but try not to worry about what others think.
  • stackhsc
    stackhsc Posts: 439 Member
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    ok, so why do you want to lose weight?

    Maybe she doesn't. Why do you assume everyone on this site wants to lose weight? I'm not on it to lose weight, I'm on it to make sure I keep weight on.

    ummm because her ticker says 31 lbs lost with a goal of 39 lbs... i never assume everyone wants to lose weight, the ticker just seemed to indicate she does
  • randomtai
    randomtai Posts: 9,003 Member
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    ok, so why do you want to lose weight?

    I am actually at goal weight, I never updated my goal weight, so my ticker reflects this, so there's that. In any event, my race or society's perception would be the last reason. Either way, why does it matter so much to you? I was responding to the OP.
  • bugaboo_sue
    bugaboo_sue Posts: 552 Member
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    youve never had someone tell you that some part of your body didnt fit some stereotype? no *kitten*, too big an *kitten*.... even if they didnt say it you never felt societal pressures to change the look of your body due to some preconceived notion of what sexy is? or what looks good to others?
    some people are more sensitive to weight related comments than others too. It never really bothered me much if someone said i was overweight when i was, it more bothered me when people thought i was sick or lost too much weight when i was still at 215 lbs......

    Absolutely not.

    - I will never have big boobs unless I get them augmented and that will never happen (aside from the risks I don't have a lot of skin/fat to "play with" in that area so it would look ridiculous).
    - I will never have a big 'ole booty but I have a nice booty and I'm happy with that.

    I have never felt any "social pressures" to fit some preconceived notion of what someone is "supposed" to look like or because of someone's notion of what sexy is. I lift weights and eat healthy to change my body to how I want it too look. If in my head I am telling myself what I need to change and if I don't like what I see in the mirror it has nothing to do with how the all powerful "THEY" think I should look but how I want to look.

    I don't care what "society" thinks is beautiful or sexy because they mean nothing to me. If you don't like the way I look because I don't fit into your neat little "box" of what is "right" then that's your issue not mine.
  • mswoodsy
    mswoodsy Posts: 91 Member
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    Now, what do you do about it?

    Start an affirmations journal. Pick 3-5 statements that you WANT to be true. Things like "I love the way my body looks." or "I think my butt looks good as it is." You write each statement 10+ times, 5 times or so a day. Whenever the nasty thoughts start to come at you, just start writing your affirmations. They're really helpful. There's scientific basis behind the idea; your brain is programmable, and you can "re-wire" your feelings on a subject by hearing, writing, and seeing it enough times.



    this is what a professional would recommend. in other words, its good advice.
  • I_Will_End_You
    I_Will_End_You Posts: 4,397 Member
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    Let’s calm it down people. I am not worried about what others think. Everyone strives towards what body they like or want to be like. To sit here and act like you are 100% loving yourself/body is a down right lie. If that was the case none of us would be here on this site counting calories.


    Wow. A bunch of people trying to encourage you and help you out, and you call them liars.

    And I don't count calories. I'm here for the GIFs and the snark. So thanks, one out of two ain't bad!
  • stackhsc
    stackhsc Posts: 439 Member
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    congrats on hitting your goal, thats awesome maybe someday i will too (still you were here to lose weight, that was my point in that quote to mccindy)

    just curious i suppose,

    id be willing to bet many people lose weight for themselves or for medical reasons etc. With that said the for themselves is probably frequently at least subconsciously driven by the vision of them selves that they are striving to get to. This vision most likely comes from some form of societal influences such as what attractive is and this does seem to vary from culture to culture ( not on an individual basis but as a whole) . Any way, im not trying to start an argument, just a discussion, sorry if you are offended.
  • morehealthymatt
    morehealthymatt Posts: 208 Member
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    "I don't give a damn what men find attractive. It's unfortunate what we find pleasing to the touch and pleasing to the eye is seldom the same." Fabienne, Pulp Fiction.

    Who is telling you that your body is to thin/to chunky? whomever it is, ignore them. You're fine.
  • Isakizza
    Isakizza Posts: 754 Member
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    Also mixed race... Mexican & Middle Eastern girl over here!!!

    I don't think it really matters what race, age, shape a women (or man) might be. At one point or other we all seem to feel the pressures of looking a certain way. I'm very happy to say that it has taken me many years to finally come to accept my looks. My crazy curly hair, brownie skin, and so on. Beauty is truly in the eyes of the beholder, everyone has their own preference.

    Just trying to be the best version of ME! :happy:

    21525558.png
  • mswoodsy
    mswoodsy Posts: 91 Member
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    I think people are being pretty rude to you, when you were just looking for some similar experiences. A lot of people have body image issues. Many, many women (in particular, but men as well) have eating disorders because they hate their bodies. I've been there. I live there. It doesn't seem to matter if you have a pretty face or not; if you are disgusted or ashamed of your body, that feeling doesn't just "go away".

    Now, what do you do about it?

    Start an affirmations journal. Pick 3-5 statements that you WANT to be true. Things like "I love the way my body looks." or "I think my butt looks good as it is." You write each statement 10+ times, 5 times or so a day. Whenever the nasty thoughts start to come at you, just start writing your affirmations. They're really helpful. There's scientific basis behind the idea; your brain is programmable, and you can "re-wire" your feelings on a subject by hearing, writing, and seeing it enough times.

    Hope this helps, and you can always talk to me!

    Actually, the OP was wondering if her experience is typical. She said:
    Us woman cannot win. Our body images are all over the place or at least mine is....

    This makes me wonder – do others have my same issue?...

    Nothing in that suggests that she just wants similar stories.

    And what did YOUR response do for the poster? Whooole lotta nothing...
    If you're all about staying on topic, how bout you do the same

    Besides...
    Similar stories
    Typical experiences
    Kinda the same thing, no?


    I refer you to "what's with the forum hate" thread, they're talking about you.
  • _Waffle_
    _Waffle_ Posts: 13,049 Member
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    Native American, Irish, French, Polish, British, who knows what the heck else. I just put myself down as "mutt" and roll with whatever it is. It's not as if I can change that. Just work with what you've got. You might as well worry about the planetary drift of the solar system or the distance of the Earth to the Moon. In both scenarios you have the same amount of power to change the outcome.
  • Jesmoko
    Jesmoko Posts: 203 Member
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    Was called a fat ****er when I was fat, now I'm just a plain old ugly ****er. If I ever decide to properly work out, I'll probably be a ugly buff ****er. That's BUFF, I said BUFF.

    I've made my bed with that, I don't really feel particular pressure from society to fit some mold. Then again I'm pretty detached from that stuff in the first place.
  • dakotababy
    dakotababy Posts: 2,406 Member
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    The music video anaconda is absolutely ridiculous. Any female that compares herself to the images shown for that music video is demented.
  • caterpillardreams
    caterpillardreams Posts: 476 Member
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    I feel ya girl. I am Puerto Rican and Dominican. I was always thin and was told I was just too skinny. Chicken legs, no butt, whatever u can think of. On the flip side, I had strangers and friends telling me I could be a model and had a dancer's body. I listened to my family and did and ate everything I could to gain that butt and thighs. Well I got them, plus way more than I wanted, and a terrible relationship with food. Nothing was wrong with my body. Body issues suck and I still struggle with my family who think my goal weight is too thin or "unnecessary." THATS MY BODY, SO DEAL! Lol ugh...the struggle is real.

    I feel you. I am Dominican and all I heard growing up is you are too skinny. eat some more. always called a flat booty. I just do not get it. Anyways I gained weight after the babies and first thing I hear is you have gained too much weight.
    Wish I would have known back then that I was fine just the way I was. I have to love me for me, not what anyone in my family says is right just because its the way Dominicans are supposed to look.
    I love my culture but sometimes people hold on to things that are not that important. I will never pass that on to my children.

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