MFP has really changed
Replies
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OP I could not agree more0
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I started on this site for the first time about three years ago. At that time it was a wonderful place to get motivation and support. I found a lot of nice and helpful people. This site is suppose to be about supporting each other, but more and more I see people being less supportive and just down right mean. Some users seem to have an attitude that they are better because they have been a successful where another user wasn't as successful or is taking just a little more time.
I have read multiple post today where a person asked a simple question and they were ridiculed for it. One poor girl simply asked what was the difference between light cleaning and heavy cleaning. That's all she wanted to know, but there were post after post about how she shouldn't log cleaning. It's not anyone's right to tell another person what they should and shouldn't log. If I decided to log "walking to my fridge to get a snack" it's no one's business but my own.
I think some users are forgetting the reasons for a site like this. I also want to make it clear that I'm saying "some users", because there are still a lot of genuinely nice people on here.
We all need to be kind to one another. Most of us have all been in the same situation and for the few of you that have always been fit and use the site to keep track of your fitness then you need to understand that it doesn't come as easy to some as it does to you. For the ones that have been overweight and out of shape remember where you have come from and how you felt in the beginning.
It shouldn't matter if you are morbidly obese, too thin, or have never had an issue. We are all here for the same reason and that's to be the best us we can be. So, as I said before be kind to one another or you're disrespecting the site, the members, and yourself. It's fantastic to look good but real beauty still comes from within.
So you've been here 3 years but made a new account just to complain about this? Awesome! Great job! You can do it!!
Is that motivating enough for you?
Honestly, the main reason people comment on things like logging cleaning is because of the people who say, I'm eating under my cals and not losing weight, etc. Eating back vastly inaccurate calorie numbers for dusting a mantle can stall weight loss, as can inaccurate logging. Would pointing out using measuring cups and a food scale for someone who eyeballs everything be criticism too?
Correcting inaccurate information is not criticism, and taking it as such is a mistake. In the immortal words of Sgt Hulko: "Lighten up Francis."
I agree with both of you guys, to an extent.
I've basically been here for four years (i left to try another logging site for a short period of time which i ended up hating, and came back to MFP), and i've seen the environment go from one of encouragement and education to one of hostility that places an unspoken emphasis on some sort of superiority.
I do agree with the above comment, that we should point out the flaws in people's logic or methods - but only in manners that are not hostile or malicious. Education is SO important when it comes to health and weight loss, so we should all be placing an emphasis on such....i just don't see why the added hostility is necessary.. I could understand debating scientific articles/journals if people believe different theories, but that is something that could easily occur, without the put-downs, degrading tones, etc.
(This is all also said, assuming we are talking about reasonable individuals, and not the 'special snowflake' variation individuals, whom take any disagreement as a 'put-down'.)0 -
I started on this site for the first time about three years ago. At that time it was a wonderful place to get motivation and support. I found a lot of nice and helpful people. This site is suppose to be about supporting each other, but more and more I see people being less supportive and just down right mean. Some users seem to have an attitude that they are better because they have been a successful where another user wasn't as successful or is taking just a little more time.
I have read multiple post today where a person asked a simple question and they were ridiculed for it. One poor girl simply asked what was the difference between light cleaning and heavy cleaning. That's all she wanted to know, but there were post after post about how she shouldn't log cleaning. It's not anyone's right to tell another person what they should and shouldn't log. If I decided to log "walking to my fridge to get a snack" it's no one's business but my own.
I think some users are forgetting the reasons for a site like this. I also want to make it clear that I'm saying "some users", because there are still a lot of genuinely nice people on here.
We all need to be kind to one another. Most of us have all been in the same situation and for the few of you that have always been fit and use the site to keep track of your fitness then you need to understand that it doesn't come as easy to some as it does to you. For the ones that have been overweight and out of shape remember where you have come from and how you felt in the beginning.
It shouldn't matter if you are morbidly obese, too thin, or have never had an issue. We are all here for the same reason and that's to be the best us we can be. So, as I said before be kind to one another or you're disrespecting the site, the members, and yourself. It's fantastic to look good but real beauty still comes from within.
THANK YOU for posting this. I am always looking for friends on this site who will support me and not ridicule me. Each of us comes from a different background. Some have been overweight all through life. Some have not.
Some simply do NOT have the knowledge that others have. That's why they are HERE.
For what it's worth, I come from BOTH sides of the weight loss coin. I am now overweight. As a teenager, I could eat what I wanted and remain underweight. Due to several issues, I ended up ANOREXIC.
This is why I am here. I want to lose the weight. I want to do it safely. I can starve and lose weight; I have already proven this fact. I don't want to risk losing my life to do so. I need to know how to PROPERLY exercise and PROPERLY eat.0 -
I know you can't judge tone and intentions very well through text, but sometimes I get this kind of vibe from certain posts...
and others are like this
Or even
Sometimes, though, they make me do this
And others are like this, so taken back by people's idiocy that they just don't even respond at all.
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Sigh.0
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Totally intimidating at times for new comers! I am too afraid to ask a question as I have read other replies to simple questions, and they get shot down in flames. Its a shame as it could be a cracking support network to encourage us newbies and to get good advice from those that have actually experienced it, and made their life changes work. I just look it up on google, and hope it isnt some charlatan giving me wrong advice lol!0
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_HeartsOnFire: I think you just broke my computer. :sick:
hahaha this just made me choke on my coffee :laugh: :laugh:0 -
I think its sad that some people just have so much time on their hands and use it so wastefully. Why the sarcasm? I totally agree with the OP and all the decent folk who answered her topic.
Nearly every day I come on the forum and look at threads as a topic sounds interesting, after a few reads I just get disheartened and get off. We have a fantastic tool here to use, its just a shame that the people that could do with a little bit of help are shot down so quickly by the sarcastic mean few.
To the many of you that give help and support a BIG thank you. To the others get a life.0 -
EVERY MORNING I CRAP THE BED.
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Anyone bring a mop for all the salty tears in this thread?
Pro tip OP (I know you're still watching, you aren't fooling anyone.) and OP's little supporters:
No one here exists to validate you. No one here exists to tell you what nonsense you want to hear.
If you're posting about diet pills, MLM crap, cleanses/detoxes and all other assorted wastes of time and money:
You WILL be told in no uncertain terms that you're wasting time and money.
You are not owed an apology, soft and fluffy words or "respect for your opinion" in that scenario.
Posting about that crap can be a detriment to lurkers who are desperate to make a quick fix change.
If you want to engage in that bunk, that's YOUR problem and yours alone.
If you want to waste time and delude yourself into thinking that "heavy cleaning" is legitimate exercise, that's your business.
Know that if you ask someone for an opinion, you will receive it. And chances are, it might be contrary to what your fragile ego needs to hear.
That's no one's problem but yours.
Part of being an adult is accepting that not everyone agrees with you, not everyone needs to agree with you and that you aren't entitled to respect for an opinion based on pseudoscience. Anecdotal evidence is all fine and well, but largely irrelevant.
If you don't want to act like an adult, don't. That's your choice.
But don't stamp your feet and cry when other people do.
*This message has been brought to you by A Mean Person Who Isn't Interested In Your Feelings*
I think I love you
Same.0 -
I think its sad that some people just have so much time on their hands and use it so wastefully. Why the sarcasm? I totally agree with the OP and all the decent folk who answered her topic.
Nearly every day I come on the forum and look at threads as a topic sounds interesting, after a few reads I just get disheartened and get off. We have a fantastic tool here to use, its just a shame that the people that could do with a little bit of help are shot down so quickly by the sarcastic mean few.
To the many of you that give help and support a BIG thank you. To the others get a life.
So anyone who disagrees with the OP isn't "decent folk?" That's not a very nice thing to say.0 -
Anyone bring a mop for all the salty tears in this thread?
Pro tip OP (I know you're still watching, you aren't fooling anyone.) and OP's little supporters:
No one here exists to validate you. No one here exists to tell you what nonsense you want to hear.
If you're posting about diet pills, MLM crap, cleanses/detoxes and all other assorted wastes of time and money:
You WILL be told in no uncertain terms that you're wasting time and money.
You are not owed an apology, soft and fluffy words or "respect for your opinion" in that scenario.
Posting about that crap can be a detriment to lurkers who are desperate to make a quick fix change.
If you want to engage in that bunk, that's YOUR problem and yours alone.
If you want to waste time and delude yourself into thinking that "heavy cleaning" is legitimate exercise, that's your business.
Know that if you ask someone for an opinion, you will receive it. And chances are, it might be contrary to what your fragile ego needs to hear.
That's no one's problem but yours.
Part of being an adult is accepting that not everyone agrees with you, not everyone needs to agree with you and that you aren't entitled to respect for an opinion based on pseudoscience. Anecdotal evidence is all fine and well, but largely irrelevant.
If you don't want to act like an adult, don't. That's your choice.
But don't stamp your feet and cry when other people do.
*This message has been brought to you by A Mean Person Who Isn't Interested In Your Feelings*0 -
Anyone bring a mop for all the salty tears in this thread?
Pro tip OP (I know you're still watching, you aren't fooling anyone.) and OP's little supporters:
No one here exists to validate you. No one here exists to tell you what nonsense you want to hear.
If you're posting about diet pills, MLM crap, cleanses/detoxes and all other assorted wastes of time and money:
You WILL be told in no uncertain terms that you're wasting time and money.
You are not owed an apology, soft and fluffy words or "respect for your opinion" in that scenario.
Posting about that crap can be a detriment to lurkers who are desperate to make a quick fix change.
If you want to engage in that bunk, that's YOUR problem and yours alone.
If you want to waste time and delude yourself into thinking that "heavy cleaning" is legitimate exercise, that's your business.
Know that if you ask someone for an opinion, you will receive it. And chances are, it might be contrary to what your fragile ego needs to hear.
That's no one's problem but yours.
Part of being an adult is accepting that not everyone agrees with you, not everyone needs to agree with you and that you aren't entitled to respect for an opinion based on pseudoscience. Anecdotal evidence is all fine and well, but largely irrelevant.
If you don't want to act like an adult, don't. That's your choice.
But don't stamp your feet and cry when other people do.
*This message has been brought to you by A Mean Person Who Isn't Interested In Your Feelings*
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If you really think that, you should read this thread:
slipped up today for first time and now debating quitting.
These people could not be sweeter to this woman who needed their help.0 -
I think its sad that some people just have so much time on their hands and use it so wastefully. Why the sarcasm? I totally agree with the OP and all the decent folk who answered her topic.
Nearly every day I come on the forum and look at threads as a topic sounds interesting, after a few reads I just get disheartened and get off. We have a fantastic tool here to use, its just a shame that the people that could do with a little bit of help are shot down so quickly by the sarcastic mean few.
To the many of you that give help and support a BIG thank you. To the others get a life.
Well, this is nice.0 -
I like turtles
I have a pet turtle called Larry.
True story.
What was this thread about again? :bigsmile: :drinker:0 -
If this rolls, will it count as a Friday mean people thread? :bigsmile:0
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Depends where in the world you live. If you live in Australia the thread has been in Friday from the very beginning0
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This thread is still going?
The only way MFP has changed in the time I've been here is that many of the individuals that were knowledgeable, gave good, straight advice and information are gone. Too many times they were called mean, bullies, were white knighted against, and received strikes so they just don't post anymore.
If anything, more and more misinformation has become more rampant on these boards because the "meanies" just don't post anymore.0 -
I started on this site for the first time about three years ago. At that time it was a wonderful place to get motivation and support. I found a lot of nice and helpful people. This site is suppose to be about supporting each other, but more and more I see people being less supportive and just down right mean. Some users seem to have an attitude that they are better because they have been a successful where another user wasn't as successful or is taking just a little more time.
I have read multiple post today where a person asked a simple question and they were ridiculed for it. One poor girl simply asked what was the difference between light cleaning and heavy cleaning. That's all she wanted to know, but there were post after post about how she shouldn't log cleaning. It's not anyone's right to tell another person what they should and shouldn't log. If I decided to log "walking to my fridge to get a snack" it's no one's business but my own.
I think some users are forgetting the reasons for a site like this. I also want to make it clear that I'm saying "some users", because there are still a lot of genuinely nice people on here.
We all need to be kind to one another. Most of us have all been in the same situation and for the few of you that have always been fit and use the site to keep track of your fitness then you need to understand that it doesn't come as easy to some as it does to you. For the ones that have been overweight and out of shape remember where you have come from and how you felt in the beginning.
It shouldn't matter if you are morbidly obese, too thin, or have never had an issue. We are all here for the same reason and that's to be the best us we can be. So, as I said before be kind to one another or you're disrespecting the site, the members, and yourself. It's fantastic to look good but real beauty still comes from within.
I'm gonna try to address this without making it a whole thing.
Yes, you can log whatever you want. But when you ask for advice, you'll get advice. And anyone who cares is gonna tell you logging things as exercise that aren't really exercise is a bad idea.
It may not be what you want to hear, but it's good advice. And that's the problem. Some people want advice, some people want to be told they're doing everything right no matter what.
I've seen people be unnecessarily rude, I've seen people be extraordinarily kind. Just like life. It's no different here. It's everyone's choice if they want to focus on the positive or the negative.
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[/img]0 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This time last year the site was great. All of a sudden it's now like some dreggy dating site where people look down their noses at each other and race to pass snarky comments.
I've been around awhile. The only thing that's changed is an increase in the number of know it all trigger warning no-criticism zone special snowflakes.
TL:DR all the replies
I have friends on my home feed for support and motivation, I come to the forums for information, not pats on the back. Period.0 -
I think its sad that some people just have so much time on their hands and use it so wastefully. Why the sarcasm? I totally agree with the OP and all the decent folk who answered her topic.
Nearly every day I come on the forum and look at threads as a topic sounds interesting, after a few reads I just get disheartened and get off. We have a fantastic tool here to use, its just a shame that the people that could do with a little bit of help are shot down so quickly by the sarcastic mean few.
To the many of you that give help and support a BIG thank you. To the others get a life.
...Wait a sec... someone who agrees with the OP, is call everyone who doesn't non-decent, and then tells them all to get a life.... OH YEAH, that's DEFINITELY a post from a FRIENDLY person right there.
You know you can agree with the OP without insulting people, right? Though, perhaps the only way to combat a meanie is to then become a meanie yourself? Is that what you're attempting here?0 -
I think its sad that some people just have so much time on their hands and use it so wastefully. Why the sarcasm? I totally agree with the OP and all the decent folk who answered her topic.
Nearly every day I come on the forum and look at threads as a topic sounds interesting, after a few reads I just get disheartened and get off. We have a fantastic tool here to use, its just a shame that the people that could do with a little bit of help are shot down so quickly by the sarcastic mean few.
To the many of you that give help and support a BIG thank you. To the others get a life.
You say that as if sarcasm takes appreciably more time than not.
Also, can I assume that your position is that disagreeing with OP = sarcasm and agreeing with OP = helpful?
Finally, please provide examples of these disheartening messages so we can better understand wherein you believe the problem lies.
Thanks...and here's a flower: :flowerforyou:0 -
This thread is still going?
The only way MFP has changed in the time I've been here is that many of the individuals that were knowledgeable, gave good, straight advice and information are gone. Too many times they were called mean, bullies, were white knighted against, and received strikes so they just don't post anymore.
If anything, more and more misinformation has become more rampant on these boards because the "meanies" just don't post anymore.
This.0 -
Take what you want and leave the rest Just sayin0
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This thread is still going?
The only way MFP has changed in the time I've been here is that many of the individuals that were knowledgeable, gave good, straight advice and information are gone. Too many times they were called mean, bullies, were white knighted against, and received strikes so they just don't post anymore.
If anything, more and more misinformation has become more rampant on these boards because the "meanies" just don't post anymore.
And yet those who were calling out the meanies years ago for the tone of their messages are now back on MFP to try again and this time they're super-serious.
There's a conclusion to be drawn here...
...and if I explicitly stated it, I'd be called a "meanie".0 -
Objectum est veritas prima hatred. Quintus Septimius Florens Tertullianus
*just trying to roll this mess0 -
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