Quit blaming your kids!

RobinSturgeon

I watched Oprah today with my two sons 7-10 and it was a sad story of child abuse...long story short, the kid would get so hungry he would eat paperbags...my son looked at me and said sorry for being so fussy tonite at dinner...sometimes our kids need a wakeup call about how good they have it, and if eating healthy is the worst thing a mom does to them then they should count their lucky stars!!! My boys got the point!

maserati185

Wow, Lola. That is so incredibly sad. Literally made me tear. But you make a great point. By no means is giving healthy foods to your children equating to being a "bad parent". The real problem, I imagine, is the PARENT not wanting to eat healthy. (i.e. If *I* don't like it, how could they possibly like it?) But as I'm learning better, I'm trying to teach my children also.

lisa35120

I kind of grew up on pizza & fast food. Now I have cravings all the time... I don't have kids yet but I want to overcome the cravings before I do! I know I wouldn't want them to think of junk food as "comfort food" like I do.

cmriverside

The other part of this equation is why blame someone else's eating habits for what goes into your mouth, Mom? It sounds like just one more excuse to blame someone else for our not being able to control our own body.


On a happier note, this ROCKS, funky spunky!! :laugh::laugh:

Heather75

i agree. we should execute any parents that give their kids anything with processed sugars in it. then with the parents out of the way, we can put the kids to work in the salt mines.

YES! More salt for us! Muahahahahahahahah! Muahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!

mandamama

meh, guess I will be the first to say, all is well in moderation. My daughter gets some processed poision every now and again. does that mean I blame her? um no. I feel like the opposite of what some have said, becuase of the way MY mother was... with being so strict, no snacks, no junk, is the reason I ate the way I did, I was a junk food junkie, I would get it in wherever and whenever I could becuase I was never allowed it growing up... SO one of the new things for me is live it in moderation. I think if we allow moderate "unhealthy" snacking, then we teach our children about healthy choices, and that a "bad snack" once in a while is okay. Guess I am a bad mother LOL

tamanella

So true! Thanks for the post!

Just_Dot

Mandamama, I let my kids have "crap" sometimes too...but for the most part, my kids would rather have healthy food than junk. However, sometimes I like a sweet treat, and I don't begrudge my kids one either. Again, it's all about moderation, IMHO. I do agree that "blaming" your kids for stocking your cabinets with junk isn't cool.

edited for overuse of the word "however" :laugh:

amber_hanners

meh, guess I will be the first to say, all is well in moderation. My daughter gets some processed poision every now and again. does that mean I blame her? um no. I feel like the opposite of what some have said, becuase of the way MY mother was... with being so strict, no snacks, no junk, is the reason I ate the way I did, I was a junk food junkie, I would get it in wherever and whenever I could becuase I was never allowed it growing up... SO one of the new things for me is live it in moderation. I think if we allow moderate "unhealthy" snacking, then we teach our children about healthy choices, and that a "bad snack" once in a while is okay. Guess I am a bad mother LOL

im with you on this one my kids still eat some junk but i workin on it for sure i changed all bread to wheat changed there sugary cereal to a more healthy version etc but they still have chicken nuggets, french fries and the occasional candy bar

mandamama

yeah I totally agree you can't stock your cupboards with crap and blame them.They aren't the ones who are shopping!! I have one of those wierd kids that loves brussels sprouts, and likes to take raw spinach instead of sandwiches for lunch LOL so I know 99.5% of the time shes eating healthy, so if she wants a grilled cheese and some fries from Mc Ds its not a big deal to me, or if her lunch is normally one fruit, one veggie, cheesewhiz on celery sumn like that, I will throw in some spider man fruit snacks, its not a big deal to me. moderation moderation moderation.

ladyhawk00

The other part of this equation is why blame someone else's eating habits for what goes into your mouth, Mom? It sounds like just one more excuse to blame someone else for our not being able to control our own body.


On a happier note, this ROCKS, funky spunky!! :laugh::laugh:

:laugh: :laugh: :laugh:

mandamama

oh yeah and.. (boy I am just full of opinion today) I think thats the difference between people DIETING and people CHANGING THEIR LIFESTYLE... My LIFESTYLE includes my husband and children, what I eat, they eat, I don't have snacks that are "mine" they are welcome to anything I am having, I want us all to be healthier

celeste_xo

I absolutely agree! I wish more adults had this mindset. My mother is one of those moms that always kept junk food in the house like cookies, rice krispies, sugary food, brownies, chips... the list goes on and on. No wonder I always overate as a kid and got used to eating such bad food. She would always take me to Burger King, Taco Bell or McDonalds. I remember after my soccer practices she would take me to McDonalds and let me get a Big Mac, fries and a Frostee. Even an ADULT shouldn't be eating that as a meal! I wish she would have taught me from a younger age to eat well, but unfortunately that wasn't the case and I'm still pretty much going through fast food withdrawals while I try to lose weight. It's gotten a lot better since I first started MFP, but there are days where I'll just crave sugar and fatty foods endlessly and it's so hard to resist.

Anyway, my lesson learned is that I never want my kids to have to go through this. Even though I never got horribly overweight (my highest weight was 200 pounds), my self-esteem was awful and I always got made fun of in middle school. I definitely don't want that for my kids. Fruits and veggies for them! And I'll punch them anytime we pass a McDonalds so they'll never want to go inside LOL

natskedat

Word! We bring a ton of snacks with us everywhere. If they're *really* hungry, they'll eat the peeled baby carrots, steamed and cooled sweet potato sticks, whole wheat crackers, edamame, hummus and pita, and string cheese I pack.

What's amazing is that now, my 4 year old can get herself a snack, and she usually chooses a handful of blueberries and some crackers. It's so cool! Her friend's mom told me that she was completely uninterested in a Lunchable, too.

Bottom line: If soda's not there, they won't drink it. Neither will you. If processed, refined sugary snacks aren't there, they won't eat them. Neither will you. If you make a healthy dinner and they don't want it, it's their stomachs they have to contend with.

I'm kind of a hardliner.

frostiegurl

Honestly, I wish it were that simple in my household. Unfortunately I don't do the shopping for everyone in the house as if I did, I'd get nothing but complaints from the youngest, and somehow most powerful, member of the family(my boyfriend's son). It's crap to be quite honest because I buy all of this wonderful, healthy, nutritious and delicious food and when I prepare a family meal, the youngest inevitably balks and his father makes him something else. The other son and even my boyfriend will eat anything I cook, so I know it's not my cooking abilities. I happen to be quite skilled in the kitchen, in fact. It's just so frustrating sometimes for me and I've taken to preparing my meals separately on most nights that we have the boys just to avoid the sulking and listless picking at food.

Even worse is my boyfriend's lack of desire and/or ability to prepare a meal that didn't originate from a can or box. I can't count how many times I've come home from my night classes only to find that, despite an overflowing pantry/freezer/refrigerator, they've opted to get take out. His reply to my query as to why he does this when we have a house full of food is always "I don't know what to make with it". I've offered to show him a few quick and easy recipes but he shows no interest whatsoever.

Oh and don't get me started on their steady diet of pop tarts for breakfast. Eww, 200 calories of artificially flavored cardboard. I'll admit that I've given my boyfriend tons of grief over his obsession with stocking the cupboards with the abominable rectangles to no avail. He buys them in bulk in huge boxes of 36 or 48. For 200 calories I have a delicious filling bowl of creamy oat bran or multi-grain hot cereal with almond milk, flax seed meal and blueberries.

Do I let this derail my eating at all? Not for a second! In a strange way, it strengthens my resolve and convictions to be a healthy human being. I ignore the constant supplies of cookies, ice cream, pop tarts, peanut butter cheese crackers, Capri Sun, 2 liter bottles of soda, french fries, frozen pizzas, etc. and I eat foods rich in nutrients, flavor and all around deliciousness. In summation, I believe that parents who blame their children for their lack of ability to eat healthy foods are only deluding themselves.

Wow, didn't mean for that to turn into a rant.



*edited to fix a small grammatical error

sewsimplykate

I can honestly say that my 2 yr old LOVES chocolate!! Now, with that being said i make sure that his meals are very well rounded. But i don't think it will hurt him to have a few M&Ms a couple times a week. And thats because as a child growing up i was taugh moderation. Granted he's only 2 and if you put a bowl of M&Ms in front of him he will eat them all haha Wouldn't you? ;~) But without complaining he will happily eat all his fruits, veggies, and even meat at meal times! And his super favorite snack is apple slices and a cheese stick! So i don't think i'm going to complain about him having a few M&Ms once every couple of weeks when his daddy brings him home a treat(we make a small bag last at least 2-3 days)!!

LillysGranny

I know one mom who makes her own Happy Meals and even includes a small toy from the Dollar Tree. She takes her kids to the park 2-3 times per week with these. I thought it was a great idea!

tsimehc2000

People in here can be so judgemental of others. My philosophy is if it works for you, then fine. If someone expresses a frustration about their life we are so quick to turn on them instead of lifting them up.

My wife and I have each lost over 60 lbs each. Our kids have always eaten okay, but they do have sugared cereal. We do push the whole grain cereals and have taught them portion control and moderation. All 3 of our children are average height and weight. They are not as active as they should be, but mostly because we live in a place that does not have a yard.

It just takes self-control on my wife and my part in order to not eat their food, but we do okay.

Fire away

alifer

I only wish my teenage boy wouldn't eat all the fresh fruit as soon as I get home from the store. I'm trying to eat much healthier, but its hard when he eats an entire cantelope, all the grapes, strawberries, blueberries etc...

carrie_lebel

My mom's cabinet growing up was filled with crap and you would of never seen a skinnyer family than mine. We are still pretty thin now. We ate crap all the time but the only difference is that we were highly active. Outside all day everyday and played sports such a big difference from the kids today. That is what I encourage the most for my kids to go outside and stay outside. I don't worry about foods to much since they are active and thin. Oh but there is no excuse to blame your kid for bad food

carrie_lebel

I do want to add that my husband's mom did not stock her cabinets with junk food, no sugar cereal , no Debbie snacks, no crap whatsoever, like my family and the three sibling grew to be obese in their Pre- teens. Meanwhile, my family ate crap and we all are skinny. How does that work?

carrie_lebel

People in here can be so judgemental of others. My philosophy is if it works for you, then fine. If someone expresses a frustration about their life we are so quick to turn on them instead of lifting them up.

My wife and I have each lost over 60 lbs each. Our kids have always eaten okay, but they do have sugared cereal. We do push the whole grain cereals and have taught them portion control and moderation. All 3 of our children are average height and weight. They are not as active as they should be, but mostly because we live in a place that does not have a yard.

It just takes self-control on my wife and my part in order to not eat their food, but we do okay.

Fire away

My son eats sugar cereal and I snack on it when calories permit. I'm not scared. Ha

Christie422

Since I started here I've had a lot less junk in the house so when my 6 year old son wanted a snack I gave him raw veggies with some hummus. He gobbled it up and came back asking for more red and yellow pepper strips of all things!

Lisa__Michelle

I agree!!

And while we are on the subject, taking your kids to mcdonalds every week is not responsible parenting!!!! That is the worst crap you could possibly feed your kids. The playplace is a marketing ploy to get families in the door so the kids can run while we relax and eat, but it's horribly unhealthy! (I have so many friends that do this a few times a week)

I knew a woman that fed her 3 year old Mconalds everyday (literally 7 days a week he would get chicken nuggets, fries, and a drink). He would have it for 2 meals a day because she worked her own business and gave him the quickest option 7 days a week. Well, he was 3 when I first came around them. She still fed him that 7 days a week at 4, 5, 6.... My point is, somehow he stayed thin but ALL of his baby teeth turned BLACK and decayed before they could even fall out (his entire mouth was black). I don't keep in contact with that family anymore but God only knows what his adult teeth look like now lol.

Lisa__Michelle

I do want to add that my husband's mom did not stock her cabinets with junk food, no sugar cereal , no Debbie snacks, no crap whatsoever, like my family and the three sibling grew to be obese in their Pre- teens. Meanwhile, my family ate crap and we all are skinny. How does that work?

Just because you are thin does not mean you are healthy. Have you ever heard of being "skinny-fat"? You can be a VERY thin person and have a high percentage of body fat if you get the accurate test at the doctors office. It also doesn't mean it is not clogging your arteries. I have heard of thin and active people getting heart attacks because their food clogged their arteries.

Lisa__Michelle

I know one mom who makes her own Happy Meals and even includes a small toy from the Dollar Tree. She takes her kids to the park 2-3 times per week with these. I thought it was a great idea!

OMG, I may have to steal that idea in the future if I have kids lol. That is a brilliant idea. The toys are only a dollar so you are talking 2-3 dollars a week to put in a bagged lunch and your kids is just as happy as mcdonalds! They really only want the toy anyway.

dlaplume2

I agree. When I go grocery shopping I buy 4 or 5 different kinds of fruit, but only one kind of cookies. My cookies are still gone in 1 day, (I have 5 kids, so it doesn't take long) but the rest of the week they are eating fruit.

JunkFoodJane

Hmm... I've only ever seen people on tv use the "my kids have to have oreoes all day every day" excuse. When I say "its hard with 3 kids" its more "last time I walked half a mile with them one fell and started screaming like he was on fire as the stroller got stuck in a rut and my labby popped out of her collar and went on her own walk down a busy street" (true story- all at once).

And while I do my best to even bake from scratch, having fresh banana bread I top with a freshly made fruit spread to get lots of antioxidants into these guys is still very tempting for ne and very high in calories.

Mmm. Yummy


It can also be hard to prepare and portion if you have a higher needs kiddo.



Just putting it out there that all of us who say "it's hard with kids" don't have a bunch of junk in our houses.





I find having a man in the house much more challenging. Mine buys everything he buys in bulk- can say no 3 days straight? No worries, he bought four months worth of oreoes (UHG)!!!

khicks91011

You Rock!!

Superdupermom

I have to rant for just a minute. I hate, and I mean really hate, to hear people say that they have to keep their cupboards full of cookies, chips and little debbies for their kids. Pregnancy is a good excuse to have a large belly for a few months but children are not a good excuse to eat like an idiot. Why would anyone think that they need to stock their pantry full of nutritionally void foods--foods that they have determined are poison-- just because their kids like them? Are they trying to kill their kids? How much easier a life will they have if they don't have to unlearn eating junk food when they turn 30 and the spread starts? Kids don't have their own money or cars, so grow up, be a good parent and stock your kitchen with healthy food for the whole family. And yes, I do think it is ok to include a little junk in your regular diet as long as you don't go over your calories or under on any important nutrients. The only significant difference between your diet and your child's should be portion size (and maybe a glass of wine every now and then).

I TOTALLY AGREE!!! thats how you see these kids that are 8 years old and obese! ITS REDICULOUS! My daughter has snacks..like m n m's and fruit roll ups and donuts..but she also eats grilled chicken, brocolli, carrots, and more! she is a very healthy girl even tho I am overweight! So if you really care about your children you will give them the nutrients they need! I also have my daughter on fruitables because she isnt much into fruits other than bananas and a multivitamin! GREAT POST!