The funniest or strangest attempt at a pick up.....

Still_Sossy

Ok, just thinking about how many funny stories there are about pick ups any one got any? Funny weird, strange? From talking to friends there seem to be more strange ones than normal ones!

I was in a bar not too long ago and a guy came and stood next to me stood there and stared. After a while I asked him "what the he** he wanted" He actually said "I think an angel just fell from heaven, would you like me to get you to call out for God?"
I said oh honey I am no angel and I will kick your a**, now go away. Soooo cheesy and desperate. :noway:

And a few years back my girl friends and I were out and a guy was dancing with us for most of the night, he followed me out to my car so I could get something and then came back in the club. When the girls and I left, I found him sitting on top of my Explorer on the luggage rack, naked! With just his hat on! He had to be off his nut! It took lots of convincing to get him to come down!

BeautyCrys

Naked on top of you're truck? No way...he had to have been on that white stuff....

live2smyle

On time a guy asked me out...He was totally not my type I politely declined offering him a raincheck. He said "good you sound like a total stuck up B@#$ and I dont think I want your raincheck"

I married him :P We will be together 15yrs in July hahaha

Still_Sossy

On time a guy asked me out...He was totally not my type I politely declined offering him a raincheck. He said "good you sound like a total stuck up B@#$ and I dont think I want your raincheck"

I married him :P We will be together 15yrs in July hahaha

Wow! Funny how something could start!

crazymama2two

OMG that is HYSTERICAL..naked on your truck?! can't freakin top that! LOL

JesaGrace

Posting just to hear more stories....

Shannon023

I got, "I'll let you buy me a drink if I can guess your bra size."

Yeah, win/win for me. :indifferent:

bachooka

One time this 50+ french guy came up to me and said, "your muzzair, she was a bakair, no? She made zee fresh bread when you were young?" and I was like, "uhm... why?" and he responded, "because you have zee most beautiful buns!".

I laughed so hard. It was hilarious. the french accent was wonderful. lol.

bethvandenberg

I swear some of them are so stupid. Once this guy was like "I have to go to the rest room. Will you please watch my beer?" I said sure (he was a friend of a friend) then he say's "make sure you keep an eye on it. It does tricks." Really?! Yep married him. What a dork. LOL

Naomi91

I got one!

Last summer I went to the taco bell drive through (booo hissss i know) and they were fixing something by the little talk box. I couldnt speak loud enough to order so I asked the construction guy to repeat what I said since he was right there. As I am sitting there waiting, he says "so do you have a boyfriend? Because you are fine!" Haha hitting on people in drive throughs

Most awkward sit after that to wait to get my food

SweetTooth68

This guy came up to me and asked me if I believed in love at first sight or did I need him to walk by again?

I thought it was cute. Didn't marry him though lol!

Newmammaluv

Welllll I married this particular guy so I don;t know what that says about me BUT!!! here it goes...

I met my husband on Myspace (back in the day when there was ONLY myspace lol) I kept keeping him at a distance for months until finally my Mom asked if I wanted a couple extra tickets to a Theory of a Dead Man and Hinder concert that she was going to with some co-workers. I thought how freak weird to have my Mom along (kinda) on a first date but then I thought that he would never know unless I pointed her out so I said alright fine and invited him out. Concert was great, we got along well, had lots to talk about and then he dropped "the line." He looked at me totally serious as I was driving him back to his car and said "would you like to come back to my house and meet my snake Petey?" I just about died laughing right then and there and was like dude are you serious?!?! Turns out he really did have a snake named Petey and he meant for it to sound like a horrible HORRIBLE line. I guess there's a market out there for women who laugh at lines instead of taking offense to them. Who knew????

hroush

I think the problem with the guy on your explorer is that he was on his nuts. :laugh:

I can't believe that guys think those stupid lines work.

yanicka

One time this 50+ french guy came up to me and said, "your muzzair, she was a bakair, no? She made zee fresh bread when you were young?" and I was like, "uhm... why?" and he responded, "because you have zee most beautiful buns!".

I laughed so hard. It was hilarious. the french accent was wonderful. lol.

Everything sound better with a french accent...I know I have one ;o)

RoadDog

Was riding with a buddy. Bruce. We stopped in Beaumont on our way to Palm Springs and were sitting in a Denny's about 2am; drinking coffee, trying to wake up and get back on our bikes. A couple of gals walked past us. Gave us a look and a smile. Paid their bill and walked out. Bruce immediately starts talking about one of them. Her name was Linda, we found out later.

Anyways...we see them circle the building in their car. We get up, pay our bill and head out in time to see them circle Denny's for the third time. Bruce is telling me which one he has dibs on -- Linda. I was the wing man and had to take the remaining gal. Whatever.

They pulled up to us as we approached our bikes. Started chatting. Don't remember the clever pick up lines Bruce used, but he got us invited back to his chosen girl's home -- Linda. We followed on our bikes.

Got there, went inside, introductions are made. Other gal sits on couch. Bruce and I sit down as well. Linda is still standing, says, "I'll make some coffee. Can you help me, Mike?" She had a swinging style door from the living room to the kitchen, and, I swear to God, we walked through it, and, before it stopped swinging, she had me pushed up against the counter and my belt unbuckled. We ended up on the kitchen floor. It was fast , hard and furious. Loved it. We got dressed, composed ourselves, made coffee and took it out to the living room. Bruce and the other gal, sitting on the couch, not talking --awkward. Bruce obviously p*ssed at me.

What could I do? Ladies' choice, right?

PeterBuilt09

The Drunk Lady at the bar who said she needed help because she lost her cell phone and needed me to try and call it for her.. I watch her purse light up and point to it thinking she was just that drunk... Nope, She texted me later that nite and the following 3 days

bachooka

One time this 50+ french guy came up to me and said, "your muzzair, she was a bakair, no? She made zee fresh bread when you were young?" and I was like, "uhm... why?" and he responded, "because you have zee most beautiful buns!".

I laughed so hard. It was hilarious. the french accent was wonderful. lol.

Everything sound better with a french accent...I know I have one ;o)

Yes, I love french accents... My cousins are from Quebec and I could listen to them talk for hours... But I married the least french man in the whole world. lol

Carl01

No one has ever tried to pick me up.

AdoraK

Outside the liquor store I had a man ask me if I had a pole. I was like what? He had a heavy accent. He repeated it three times. First I was like is this man a weirdo and talking about is Pen1s and asking if I wanted his? Then I was guessing maybe he has a flat and did not know what to call the tire iron.....

Well he started making swimming motions and I figured out he was asking me if I had a pool and if not he would love for me to go swimming in his. Ha here are more innuendos’. Nope did not marry him!

No I already had a pool that I could swim in - my then boyfriend and now husbands parents.
.

RoadDog

On time a guy asked me out...He was totally not my type I politely declined offering him a raincheck. He said "good you sound like a total stuck up B@#$ and I dont think I want your raincheck"

I married him :P We will be together 15yrs in July hahaha

That line never works for me.

crazymama2two

oooh ooh...speaking of dorks!! well, awhile back the verizon guy came to put my phone line in my new apt, went on a date with him, had a one night stand, never called him back...yeah, yeah, slut i know. anyways, fast forward 3 months when i get a phone call from said verizon guy who said to me "thanks for flowers you sent to the hospital while i was there. it was really nice to be thought of by you" im positive i looked like a tool with my mouth all slackjawed and crickets in the background when i failed to respond and then i hear - "yeah, im just kidding. wanna try going out again?"

yup, ladies and gents, 9 years later, 3 married, that's my man LOL

yanicka

The Drunk Lady at the bar who said she needed help because she lost her cell phone and needed me to try and call it for her.. I watch her purse light up and point to it thinking she was just that drunk... Nope, She texted me later that nite and the following 3 days

With that picture....heck I would do that too

jaelwoman

Years and years ago I was in a bar - this incredibly cute guy walked up and said "so can you tell I shaved my moustache off today?" I was hooked for 2 years!!!

crazymama2two

and now RD has me all hot under the collar or whatever that saying is

DangerRanger

And a few years back my girl friends and I were out and a guy was dancing with us for most of the night, he followed me out to my car so I could get something and then came back in the club. When the girls and I left, I found him sitting on top of my Explorer on the luggage rack, naked! With just his hat on! He had to be off his nut! It took lots of convincing to get him to come down!

i was drunk that night & you promised that you were going to keep it a secret.:blushing:

NobodyKnows

Thankfully have never needed a pickup line.

mamijujuphat

Working cashier once a guy who was buying condoms asks me "Which condoms I thought were better?" me already giving him a disgusted look..he preceeds to tell me that he'll take the kind " I like" .... I just wanted him to pay & leave....& for some reason he thought he had game because he had the nerve to ask me out....& thought I would give him my number ....I was like wth!!!....I just felt sorry for whatever girl he was gonna use the condoms with because she probably fell for a stupid pick up line similar to that...smh

Still_Sossy

And a few years back my girl friends and I were out and a guy was dancing with us for most of the night, he followed me out to my car so I could get something and then came back in the club. When the girls and I left, I found him sitting on top of my Explorer on the luggage rack, naked! With just his hat on! He had to be off his nut! It took lots of convincing to get him to come down!

i was drunk that night & you promised that you were going to keep it a secret.:blushing:

Ooooooooooooooooo, My bad. lol.

mrmarius

years ago when i was a teen my ex-girlfriends aunt asked how old i was, when i told her i was like 17 she asked if i like older women in their 40's like her :frown:

mishelnkiki

mines not really a pick up line, but its the one and only times its happened to me. i was at the bar with my girls and there this was guy. we were looking back and forth, said hey on the way by a few times, hey he was cute! so as im walking past them with my girls, i feel this hand smack the crap outta my *kitten*. and then left his hand there and squeezed the cheek! ive had my booty smacked, but NEVER like that. i turned around, and it wasnt even him. it was his friend next to him. needless to say, we have been together for the past 9 months now... off and on that is. lol.

anubis609

Of course I'd be posting a story. I think the most awkward was the most recent one I had.

I was in Vegas earlier this month and I'm in the elevator with my parents and grandmother. We're heading down to the lobby from our room and on the way down, the elevator stops on a floor, as it does, and these 3 college girls around the realm of my age, walk in and nestle in the middle of the back space that I've created between me and my family. They're appropriately dressed in relaxed flirt-wear and ready to go shopping for the day.

As the elevator doors close, immediately the "fun one" [standing right next to me] decides to start sniffing the air and says, "*sniff sniff*...Ooohh! Who smells good?!" Instinctively, I announce, "that would be me..." She turns to me and literally starts snuggling up to me, smelling my chest and neck, equipped with the proper moaning acclamations of, "*Sniff* Dammmmn...I really like that..." Clutching onto my arm at this point, I open my mouth and as I'm about to blurt out the suggestion of swapping room numbers, I look over to the other side of the elevator and have realized that my family was enjoying the scene, eyebrows raised and smirks of "Uh huuuhh...."

:indifferent:

I just had to tell fun one #1, "Thanks. Enjoy that while you can because we're about to stop." She takes one last whiff, gives me *the look*, her homegirls follow suit, all with smiles on their faces, and walk off. My dad has a smirk on his face. My mom is shaking her head laughing. My grandmother says, "Well, now you'll have a good morning. That's probably a sign of good luck for gambling later."

Then they were all talking about how I was too good for those three anyway, and words trailed off as the only words going through my mind were, "....C*ckblocked by my own family... DaAaAaAAAaaaaAAmn!!!"

Being jocked first thing in the morning is great. Getting that kind of ego stroke in front your family first thing in the morning...f*ckin' awkward. Goodbye fun ones...:brokenheart: