Friend requests with no message or photo

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  • fuminator18
    fuminator18 Posts: 89 Member
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    I wouldn't worry about it. People who get upset is probably the ones who just want "many friends". YOu have a right to ask those questions. I do the same thing on Facebook.
  • Goal4Good
    Goal4Good Posts: 115
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    I agree completely!!! If I get a friend request with no message attached (and it states in my profile that I will decline that) I STILL continue to get them!

    If the friend request is from someone who is a friend of a friend, I might add them for a while--- but if they do not participate in the give and take thing as far as support goes, they are soon deleted. I try to give all I can in encouragement and comments to my friends and have been lucky to surround myself with others of like mind.

    To me a smaller network of supportive folks beats the heck out of 500 friends who never say anything at all! After all, this site is a weight loss venue.......not a popularity contest.
  • Qarol
    Qarol Posts: 6,171 Member
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    I agree completely!!! If I get a friend request with no message attached (and it states in my profile that I will decline that) I STILL continue to get them!
    Dear, your profile is private. Since I am not one of your current friends, I cannot see said message in your profile saying you will decline it.
  • OneBryteSmile
    OneBryteSmile Posts: 808 Member
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    I completely agree and at one point even updated my profile to state please include a message and people still wouldn't include one. I think some people just collect friends and don't even take the time to read the person's profile first. I got tired of it and stopped accepting requests and updated my profile to say I would not accept anymore but I still get at least one request a day with no message. It's even more annoying when I see that the person sending me a request has hundreds of friends. One girl had over 500 so I'm wondering what the heck could she possibly need one more for. There's no way she could be supporting all 500.
  • Goal4Good
    Goal4Good Posts: 115
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    I agree completely!!! If I get a friend request with no message attached (and it states in my profile that I will decline that) I STILL continue to get them!
    Dear, your profile is private. Since I am not one of your current friends, I cannot see said message in your profile saying you will decline it.

    Oh thanks! Well that explains that!! But regardless, I think its just simple courtesy to say SOMETHING about why you want to add a perfect stranger as a friend. I have never made a friend request to anybody without stating where I saw their profile and why I think we have something in common. Its usually that they are in the same stage of life as me. You know, age, health, empty nester, etc. etc.
  • Grimlock1030
    Grimlock1030 Posts: 43
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    Whatever, I don't need a message for you to be my friend.
  • dxmancil
    dxmancil Posts: 17
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    i agree!! I'm about to start deleting some people that havent logged on or given me any feedback!

    Oh and I deleted someone who was thinking this was like FB, updating random statuses each hr. uhhhh..getouttahere!!

    so please add me:

    WHYYYYYYYYYYYY, u ask ?? :happy:

    BECAUSE I NEED MOTIVATION DAMMIT! :sad:

    i want to be told "keep it up" or "good job".. and i return the favor! and then I need people to tell me to get my lazy *kitten* up and do something!!

    :bigsmile:
  • dietfree2012
    dietfree2012 Posts: 868 Member
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    ME TOO
  • Michelle9939
    Michelle9939 Posts: 291
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    I'm new. have no info but i really don't care if someone has a picture or not. SUPPORT with or without a photo, etc..gets my support!
    AGREE!
  • FearAnLoathing
    FearAnLoathing Posts: 4,852 Member
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    I accept anyone who sends me a request,im probobly the minority on that lol
    I also get alot of friends requests then get deleted a week later hahaha im cool with that too
    infact I dont think I have ever denied a request
  • kentishmaid
    kentishmaid Posts: 11
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    Thank you Ogathicao, the voice of reason! You will never see a photo of me on here because I have a high professional profile in a small community and this is definitely my personal time, no-one else's business! Most of my friends on here are at least 200 miles away so I'm not too bothered that they're going to be banging on my door asking for a cup of tea any time soon. Sorry to disappoint, people, but this is only a friendly forum to support people with a common goal. It isn't real life.
  • idiocracy
    idiocracy Posts: 275 Member
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    Couldn't agree more with this. Just went through my friends list and cleared it out earlier today. I think I should add a note to my profile as well... I want a few supportive pals, not many unresponsive ones.
    Adding notes to profiles is fine, but if your profile can be seen only by friends then what? How will they see your note unless they are your friends?
  • angelacasey736
    angelacasey736 Posts: 249 Member
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    I have only denied one request - i think the person thought this was match.com. I do hesitate when i get requests without messages - i do prefer some sort of reason and i always give one when i send the request. I am very serious about being here and what i want to accomplish so i look for the dedication - I probably should have been as selective with friends on FB! My account there is like my garbage pail card collection back in the day. I feel closer with some of the amazing people here!
  • dietfree2012
    dietfree2012 Posts: 868 Member
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    :smile:
  • susanswan
    susanswan Posts: 1,194 Member
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    Ok, I've only been on here a week and a half but I guess I can already be accused of being a friend snob!

    Is it too much to ask that if you send me a friend request, that you at least include some message introducing yourself or telling me why you would like to be added as a friend? If it was a forum topic or you are a friend of a friend, as others of my current friends have already done..just let me know.

    Otherwise, I'll probably decline and I've added a note to my profile stating that.

    I'm very supportive as a friend. Because of this and the effort involved in keeping up with my friends, I don't want a large friends list and want to know that those I add feel likewise about the effort of reaching optimal weight and fitness level.

    I haven't searched the forums to see if this topic is posted already but just wondering how others feel about it.

    I just got a request today that didn't seem like a good fit for ME. I was going to post a forum, too! Ha! Ha! Thanks for doing the work.

    I made my profile open. I am who I am. I weigh what I weigh. I have my own philosophies on how I want to achieve my goal. It doesn't get any more personal than that! I do have a statement about letting me know something about you that I added months later after joining here. Some do leave a message and some don't.

    I have never refused anyone until today. I just need to see some level besides weight loss desire that we can connect on. Not leaving your name, not giving a quick hello, not saying what inspired you to ask, not having a profile filled out, not having a picture, those are things that bother me. I also have a number of friends now and want to really remember who they are as I'd like to be as supportive as possible. As it is, I don't get to see or comment on everyone as I'd like to! SO when I log in I make sure to comment on those people who have filled out my home page. I figure whoever makes it on that page deserves a comment. I know it doesn't cover everyone, but it is all hit and miss anyway.

    For what it's worth, I do feel terribly guilty about not accepting and also deleting friends who haven't been active in 2 - 3 months unless I hear a reason otherwise. I do want to be surrounded by people who do the work, achieve their goals, and for the most part have a philosophy that I can relate to whether it is mine or not. As it is, I can't remember many names of my friends if it isn't part of their sign in name. I started making a document of who asked to be friended so I can remember what they said to me! It gets hard to remember everyone!
  • dietfree2012
    dietfree2012 Posts: 868 Member
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    :smile:
  • proctorgirl07
    proctorgirl07 Posts: 68 Member
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    Pic or no pic, message or no message I will usually add because I dont want to miss out of what could be the greatest friend I could have on here just because something this small. I usually (on purpose) dont write a message just to see if I will be accepted.

    I look through my friend list from time to time to see if they log or if they comment, at that point then I delete or keep them. Also I will look to see what they have been commenting on to see if we share the same values or goals, that helps me decide if they are keepers or not (LOL). So add me or not, Im just me, Im on MFP to lose weight, get fit, learn info and if people or friends on here can help me do it and I can return the fav then I want to be their friend. If you dont log or dont comment we wont stay friends long!!!
  • ShazMc73
    ShazMc73 Posts: 106 Member
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    I am here about a week also, taking the approach that friends are welcome, but if they turn out to not be so friendly they are gone... lol So far so good though, folks on here have been nothing but supportive thus far.

    As for the photo, I actually don't care - am here for weight loss and some laughs - no photo no worries, but no other details or interaction, no thanks.

    My 10 cents :)
  • WifeNMama
    WifeNMama Posts: 2,876 Member
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    The ones I've accepted who didn't have a message, generally don't interact much anyway. If they want to sit on my friends list and collect dust, meh. As long as they don't go all crazy/pervy on me, I don't care.

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