MFP Bullying and Negativity needs to stop!

mikeyrp

Over the last few weeks I've read a number of naive posts from people which have quite rightly been shot down - however the way in which the MFP community has done this has been, in my opinion, negative and in many cases borderline bullying.

I'm not going to talk specifics but I think it would be good if we could all be mindful of the following things

Not everyone on the site will have the same goals - most people join the site to loose weight but some people are here to track what they eat in order to stay healthy - I'm talking about maintainers, people who are training and want to hit specific macro 's (protein, carbs etc) and people who are trying to gain weight normally following physical or mental illness. Some people just want to loose (or gain) weight - others want to become super fit athletes or body builders. Some want to have the worlds healthiest diet - others want to simply reduce their calorie intake. Every single one of these objectives is legitimate and I don't believe any of us have a right to judge one objective to be better than another.

With this in mind - a sensitive poster will state their personal objectives at the start of a post before making a statement like 'should my fridge contain more lard' ... But lets be honest - not everyone is super sensitive...

When we see a post like this we shouldn't all rush in to tell this person they are an idiot... but ask probing questions like 'have you considered that most people on this site are not looking to increase their lard intake - perhaps you can share your objectives and how will eating more lard help you to achieve them'

The worst kind of response is where we pick up on an attribute of the poster and use this to belittle them rather than to meet their statements head on with a constructive and logical argument. For example making assumption on something in a profile picture and making comments about it, or picking up on spelling or grammar issues and using this to make people feel stupid. Come on people - that's not what this community is or should be about!


So - read this then go forth and be nice to each other I know its what you all do best.

BrownEyedGiRL928

where's the "like" button when you need it. well said.

TankGirl71

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banging the "like" button like it's her job.

kater8er

AMEN. I got seriously trolled a few weeks ago for asking a simple question. Ridiculous.

hm_day

I could not agree more with this post. Love it.

MelissaL582

Thanks for posting this! I completely agree. I've been seeing that a lot lately.

jbucci1186

thank you for posting this.

andtian

where's the "like" button when you need it. well said.

what she said.

DeadlyDame13

agree and *like*

Asil76

Very well said I agree 100%.

nadiaez

very very true...I was thinking the exact same thing....some of the replies are just plain rude and can be really demeaning and/or patronising....everyone is trying hard to lead a healthier life and we should all be here to support each other!

emmaNEEDSskinny

thankyou! cannot thank you enough aha!

jenilla1

Latoyamary

where is the love button!!! LOVE IT!!!

fishgirlnola

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banging the "like" button like it's her job.

That's cute and I agree.

Strive2BLean

Well said. Thank you

ZumbaQueenKelly

Well said. I couldn't agree with you more!

CarlaRG

Love!

jeanie✰

AGREED.

nlfrancis

Love the post!! And it is so true - we need to be supportive and understanding. Being negative or rude to someone could make them give up so much of what they have gained. Just because you may not like something or be having a bad day, does not mean to be abusive.

paulahhhh

+1, Like, Props, Kudos... Whatever!!

Thanks for this post!!

traceysturn

Its unfortunate but this site has changed ALOT over the past year or so. Its a real shame!!!

bry_all01

Not everyone on the site will have the same goals - most people join the site to loose weight but some people are here to track what they eat in order to stay healthy - I'm talking about maintainers, people who are training and want to hit specific macro 's (protein, carbs etc) and people who are trying to gain weight normally following physical or mental illness. Some people just want to loose (or gain) weight - others want to become super fit athletes or body builders. Some want to have the worlds healthiest diet - others want to simply reduce their calorie intake. Every single one of these objectives is legitimate and I don't believe any of us have a right to judge one objective to be better than another.

Thank you! I am a maintainer and someone just posted something earlier today about how they were offended that "great looking" people were on here.... I'm sorry, but that offended me. I am working toward a goal all my own, and do not need to feel put down for trying to better myself. Not to mention, my eating and exercise habits have drastically changed since I joined - for the better.

MissMegan3119

So very true! I am fully willing to listen to opinions, but don't berate someone because of their motives or actions. If you don't like it, just ignore it, or express your concerns kindly.

SLaw4215

*LIKE*

LaurieEReid

Thank you. I think a few more sticky posts with really descriptive titles would help in each section. "Should I eat my exercise calories?" "How do I adjust my protein/carb ratio?" "Plateaus and possible solutions" There are a lot of, as you say, naive posts on these kinds of subjects.

tammykoon

Well said! :flowerforyou:

sweetness48

AMEN brother!

breakingthecycle

Agree and cosign 100%!

There will always be 'trolls' on a message board. Can we request an IGNORE button?

gary8964

WELL SAID! BRAVO!!!

Avalonis

Whatever. Don't make me take your lunch money

I kid. Very true, many times people attack others without cause.

At the same point, some of us get frustrated when people "ask for advice" when what they really want is someone to tell them the unhealthy things they are doing are ok....

Just saying.