if you have nothing nice to say, don't say anything at all.

BeautyFromPain

So many more rude ppl are making there ways onto the message board.
You have MAYBE half of the picture, so what gives you the right to be so freaking rude?

kthx

dids01

I agree xx

SueGeer

Not necessary. We're all here for the same goal.....let's all support each other and BE NICE!!!!!!! :flowerforyou:

Sue x

Diana35bha

Well said!

McKayMachina

Eh. I disagree. Some people think expressing different opinions from theirs is the same as being "rude" and is "not saying anything nice". I say communicate how you want to communicate, as long as it's functional and effective and/or thought provoking.

But that's just me.

If I only ever heard from people who agree with me and kiss my butt and are scared to tell me the truth, even if it's harsh, I'd probably puke.

CassieLEO

I agree.....

goron59

Agreed. Never any reason to be rude.
Harsh, maybe, but never rude.

Sarah_uk

Well said. Treat others like YOU would like to be treated.

Loko_Ino

I would want someone to tell me when I am wrong about something or being stupid..whether it be in a rude way or not. It is there intentions that count, right?
Not everyone can express themselves like a Hallmark card.

And just as you think rude folks are coming to the board, I think overly sensitive folks are coming onto the board. Sensitive folks who can't or won't face the facts that what they are doing or have been doing is just plain wrong..instead they want someone to coddle them and tell them "good job, keep your chin, it will all change" when it won't because they have no clue what they are doing.

PhilipByrne

Eh. I disagree. Some people think expressing different opinions from theirs is the same as being "rude" and is "not saying anything nice". I say communicate how you want to communicate, as long as it's functional and effective and/or thought provoking.

But that's just me.

If I only ever heard from people who agree with me and kiss my butt and are scared to tell me the truth, even if it's harsh, I'd probably puke.

Totally agree with this. There is no point in telling someone that they are wonderful if they are doing something completely stupid. There is far too much of that on MFP. I don't think I would be overweight if people occassionally reminded me that I was lazy fat *kitten*. Sometimes the truth hurts. Say it like it is I say.

BeautyFromPain

Eh. I disagree. Some people think expressing different opinions from theirs is the same as being "rude" and is "not saying anything nice". I say communicate how you want to communicate, as long as it's functional and effective and/or thought provoking.

But that's just me.

If I only ever heard from people who agree with me and kiss my butt and are scared to tell me the truth, even if it's harsh, I'd probably puke.

Totally agree with this. There is no point in telling someone that they are wonderful if they are doing something completely stupid. There is far too much of that on MFP. I don't think I would be overweight if people occassionally reminded me that I was lazy fat *kitten*. Sometimes the truth hurts. Say it like it is I say.

Dude I was told that I have a SKILLS SHORTAGE? When he doesn't know anything about me. That's a bit different to constructive criticism if you ask me.

netchik

I think constructive criticism is essential, but I read a post last week where one guy quoted a girl, then just said ""You're an idiot". further down commented on how stupid people most people were.... that wasn't constructive, it was obstructive to free debate and just plain mean.

Everyone is entitled to their opinion, and if you aren't wiling to listen to "the other side" you shouldn't be asking for advice. But I draw the line with those who's desire to be seen as better than everyone else means they degrade people in public. It's just not cool!

jade_85

I AGREE. no u dont want some one agreeing with u all the time but there is a way to say things and some people have no tact and are rude. yes some people are more sensitive than others but were here to support eachother not put eachother down.

BeautyFromPain

I think constructive criticism is essential, but I read a post last week where one guy quoted a girl, then just said ""You're an idiot". further down commented on how stupid people most people were.... that wasn't constructive, it was obstructive to free debate and just plain mean.

Everyone is entitled to their opinion, and if you aren't wiling to listen to "the other side" you shouldn't be asking for advice. But I draw the line with those who's desire to be seen as better than everyone else means they degrade people in public. It's just not cool!

It's not I'm not willing to listen to both sides, I am... it's being told I have a "skills shortage" when they know nothing about me and that is why I can not find a high paying job - after just losing my last one in the recession? WTH

BeautyFromPain

I would want someone to tell me when I am wrong about something or being stupid..whether it be in a rude way or not. It is there intentions that count, right?
Not everyone can express themselves like a Hallmark card.

And just as you think rude folks are coming to the board, I think overly sensitive folks are coming onto the board. Sensitive folks who can't or won't face the facts that what they are doing or have been doing is just plain wrong..instead they want someone to coddle them and tell them "good job, keep your chin, it will all change" when it won't because they have no clue what they are doing.

Yeah I am sensitive, I have depression - so what is that any of your business? No? Don't like what something write you can simply not reply rather than being rude can you not.

McKayMachina

I read your other post. It sounds like you are going through a hard time right now. I hope things get better for you very soon.

In the mean time, since you're very sensitive right now, you may want to consider not posting about those things on the forums. You have to have a thick skin on the internet and a diary or journal might be a better place for all these personal thoughts. That way you get the therapeutic benefits of purging some of those upsetting thoughts without having to deal with other peoples' reactions.

I hope this helps. Good luck.

katnz17

The subject heading made me smile. That was my first grade teachers favorite phrase and it's stayed with me all these years.

I feel that sometimes the rule with the internet is opposite 'if you can't say anything nasty, don't say anything at all.'

dumb_blondes_rock

Eh. I disagree. Some people think expressing different opinions from theirs is the same as being "rude" and is "not saying anything nice". I say communicate how you want to communicate, as long as it's functional and effective and/or thought provoking.

But that's just me.

If I only ever heard from people who agree with me and kiss my butt and are scared to tell me the truth, even if it's harsh, I'd probably puke.

This....Although some peoples wording is off, but if the message is the same just in a different wording then bring it on. Thats what makes us all humans is the difference of opinions. Some people wnat to be cuddles and have things sugar coated, some don't believe in that.....
BUT.....by you making this post, shows that you are the same way as the other people. Your tone was really hostile, so how is it ok for you to speak to all the "haters" out there, but they can't speak to you that way?

Life is a give and take thing. if you want to have people treat you a certain way, you must treat others that way also....too bad we can't all just get along, even with the difference of opnions

dumb_blondes_rock

I would want someone to tell me when I am wrong about something or being stupid..whether it be in a rude way or not. It is there intentions that count, right?
Not everyone can express themselves like a Hallmark card.

And just as you think rude folks are coming to the board, I think overly sensitive folks are coming onto the board. Sensitive folks who can't or won't face the facts that what they are doing or have been doing is just plain wrong..instead they want someone to coddle them and tell them "good job, keep your chin, it will all change" when it won't because they have no clue what they are doing.

Yeah I am sensitive, I have depression - so what is that any of your business? No? Don't like what something write you can simply not reply rather than being rude can you not.

\

Helpful hint: If you post ANYTHING on the internet, it makes it EVERYONES business...just saying....if you want things to be private, talk to a therapist. they are bound by dr-patient confedintiality to not talk about your case to ANYONE, so you can securely tell them ANYTHING you want to, and they can help you deal with it in a healthy way.
I have never suffered from chronic depression, but i feel for you, it must not be easy.

gel91

Yeah I am sensitive, I have depression - so what is that any of your business? No? Don't like what something write you can simply not reply rather than being rude can you not.


..To be fair if you're sensative and posting about your life on the internet then your gunna have to understand people judge, people have opinions and people will say what they want. As much as MFP is a site for help it's also very good for tough love. Otherwise we won't get anywhere.

If your sensative maybe this isn't the place for you to post your feelings, not trying to be rude, just saying - people have opinions and sure they could bypass your threads and not reply, but you could also not reply to them and bypass there comments back to you - if you're opening a thread then people reply, wether it's nice or harsh you have to accept it - not start a whole new thread complaining .. (again)

Loko_Ino

I would want someone to tell me when I am wrong about something or being stupid..whether it be in a rude way or not. It is there intentions that count, right?
Not everyone can express themselves like a Hallmark card.

And just as you think rude folks are coming to the board, I think overly sensitive folks are coming onto the board. Sensitive folks who can't or won't face the facts that what they are doing or have been doing is just plain wrong..instead they want someone to coddle them and tell them "good job, keep your chin, it will all change" when it won't because they have no clue what they are doing.

Yeah I am sensitive, I have depression - so what is that any of your business? No? Don't like what something write you can simply not reply rather than being rude can you not.

so what you wrote is not rude? I stated an opinion to your complaint of folks being rude. I dont know squat about your personal issues nor did I take the time to go look but it sounds like you posted it for the world to see. Did you think everyone would be teddy bears and roses to you? Not likely, there are always those who love to see misery in others and use that to make themselves feel better.
Like it is stated before me, maybe write a personal journal or something to purge.

And no matter what it is, it gets better, promise you that.