Role of the sexes

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  • VeganInTraining
    VeganInTraining Posts: 1,321 Member
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    So it looks like you got a lot of responses, and I don't have time to read them all but I have been thinking about posting a similar discussion, mine being more focused on early parent hood and who does what.

    I agree with those that say the person who stays home with the kids should be primarily responsible for the household regardless of gender however, being a stay at home parent (from what I can tell) is exhausting and the "bread winner" should help when possible. In my house I take care of finances simply because that is my forte, he does yardwork because I hate it and it makes him feel manly. I don't think there is a specific "women should do this and men should do that" it's all about strenghths and weaknesses. When we have kids I plan to stay at home with them, but I will still be in charge of finances because I'm good at it.

    Regardless of who does what it should be something agreed upon! Sit down and talk about it, if there's something you can't agree on then maybe you need to alternate who does it and see if someone is better at it or hire someone to do it. If you both hate yardwork or suck at it, and you can afford too, why not pay the 12 year old down the street 20 bucks to mow the lawn?
  • baisleac
    baisleac Posts: 2,019 Member
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    I think the wife should clean the home and take care of the children. I think they should alternate days on cooking and dishes. And the man should cut the grass, and take of the things that need to fixed, hung ect.

    What if he enjoys cleaning? (some people do. Weird, I know.)
    What if he's better with kids than she is?
    What if one of them enjoys cooking more? Or one can burn boiling water?
    What if she enjoys mowing the lawn?
    What if she's better with power tools?

    These things shouldn't be defined by sex.
  • VeganInTraining
    VeganInTraining Posts: 1,321 Member
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    I think the wife should clean the home and take care of the children. I think they should alternate days on cooking and dishes. And the man should cut the grass, and take of the things that need to fixed, hung ect.

    What if he enjoys cleaning? (some people do. Weird, I know.)
    What if he's better with kids than she is?
    What if one of them enjoys cooking more? Or one can burn boiling water?
    What if she enjoys mowing the lawn?
    What if she's better with power tools?

    These things shouldn't be defined by sex.

    agreed! he does the electrical work, I do the "handy person" type work (ie. drywall, plumbing)
  • infamousmk
    infamousmk Posts: 6,033 Member
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    The husband should do everything the wife can't do... the wife should do everything the husband can't do. I don't care if I took out the garbage last week... if it needs to go out, take it out. I don't care if she vacuumed 2 days ago... if it needs to be done again I'll do it.

    Cooking and bill paying/finance are the only things I can see being "assigned", but that's only because they actually take some degree of talent. If one person is clearly a better cook than the other then most of the cooking should fall on that person. There is no substitute for good food. Similarly, if one person is clearly better at managing bills/finances, then it should fall primarily on that person as missed payments, bounced checks, etc is bad.

    Everything needs gets done... who does it doesn't matter as long as it's getting done and they are sharing the responsibilities.

    This is how I feel. Running a household is a team job, and a good partnership is all about 'getting the job done'. Strengths and weaknesses are important to recognize and accept, and at the end of the day, the important thing is that everyone worked together.
  • I_give_it_2_u_str8
    I_give_it_2_u_str8 Posts: 680 Member
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    I think the wife should clean the home and take care of the children. I think they should alternate days on cooking and dishes. And the man should cut the grass, and take of the things that need to fixed, hung ect.

    What if he enjoys cleaning? (some people do. Weird, I know.)
    What if he's better with kids than she is?
    What if one of them enjoys cooking more? Or one can burn boiling water?
    What if she enjoys mowing the lawn?
    What if she's better with power tools?

    These things shouldn't be defined by sex.

    stop trolling - the girl said 'she thinks', its obvious some couples enjoy the traditional roles in a relationship and some like non-traditional

    theres not one way to run a relationship, just like theres not one way to run a company or country
  • bry_all01
    bry_all01 Posts: 3,100 Member
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    I think the wife should clean the home and take care of the children. I think they should alternate days on cooking and dishes. And the man should cut the grass, and take of the things that need to fixed, hung ect.

    What if he enjoys cleaning? (some people do. Weird, I know.)
    What if he's better with kids than she is?
    What if one of them enjoys cooking more? Or one can burn boiling water?
    What if she enjoys mowing the lawn?
    What if she's better with power tools?

    These things shouldn't be defined by sex.

    stop trolling - the girl said 'she thinks', its obvious some couples enjoy the traditional roles in a relationship and some like non-traditional

    theres not one way to run a relationship, just like theres not one way to run a company or country


    how is she trolling if she is explaining her thoughts?
  • I_give_it_2_u_str8
    I_give_it_2_u_str8 Posts: 680 Member
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    I think the wife should clean the home and take care of the children. I think they should alternate days on cooking and dishes. And the man should cut the grass, and take of the things that need to fixed, hung ect.

    What if he enjoys cleaning? (some people do. Weird, I know.)
    What if he's better with kids than she is?
    What if one of them enjoys cooking more? Or one can burn boiling water?
    What if she enjoys mowing the lawn?
    What if she's better with power tools?

    These things shouldn't be defined by sex.

    stop trolling - the girl said 'she thinks', its obvious some couples enjoy the traditional roles in a relationship and some like non-traditional

    theres not one way to run a relationship, just like theres not one way to run a company or country


    how is she trolling if she is explaining her thoughts?

    i think her thoughts have been shared by countless other people throughout the 3 pg's in this thread - lets be honest here, theres really only 2 sides of this coin. you're either for it or against it - anything else you're just trolling, whats the point?
  • VeganInTraining
    VeganInTraining Posts: 1,321 Member
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    I think the wife should clean the home and take care of the children. I think they should alternate days on cooking and dishes. And the man should cut the grass, and take of the things that need to fixed, hung ect.

    What if he enjoys cleaning? (some people do. Weird, I know.)
    What if he's better with kids than she is?
    What if one of them enjoys cooking more? Or one can burn boiling water?
    What if she enjoys mowing the lawn?
    What if she's better with power tools?

    These things shouldn't be defined by sex.

    stop trolling - the girl said 'she thinks', its obvious some couples enjoy the traditional roles in a relationship and some like non-traditional

    theres not one way to run a relationship, just like theres not one way to run a company or country

    yes, it is obvious that some couples enjoy traditional roles...but based off of her comment she "thinks" that it should be that way in all households. She did not say "in most households" or "it depends on the couple" she said she "thinks" women should do "womanly" things and men should do "manly" things....you're aweful quick to jump to her rescue, ya gotta crush?
  • bry_all01
    bry_all01 Posts: 3,100 Member
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    I think the wife should clean the home and take care of the children. I think they should alternate days on cooking and dishes. And the man should cut the grass, and take of the things that need to fixed, hung ect.

    What if he enjoys cleaning? (some people do. Weird, I know.)
    What if he's better with kids than she is?
    What if one of them enjoys cooking more? Or one can burn boiling water?
    What if she enjoys mowing the lawn?
    What if she's better with power tools?

    These things shouldn't be defined by sex.

    stop trolling - the girl said 'she thinks', its obvious some couples enjoy the traditional roles in a relationship and some like non-traditional

    theres not one way to run a relationship, just like theres not one way to run a company or country


    how is she trolling if she is explaining her thoughts?

    i think her thoughts have been shared by countless other people throughout the 3 pg's in this thread - lets be honest here, theres really only 2 sides of this coin. you're either for it or against it - anything else you're just trolling, whats the point?


    I guess I should call my husband and tell him to stop making dinner, then?
  • kevinlynch3
    kevinlynch3 Posts: 287 Member
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    I think the wife should clean the home and take care of the children. I think they should alternate days on cooking and dishes. And the man should cut the grass, and take of the things that need to fixed, hung ect.

    What if he enjoys cleaning? (some people do. Weird, I know.)
    What if he's better with kids than she is?
    What if one of them enjoys cooking more? Or one can burn boiling water?
    What if she enjoys mowing the lawn?
    What if she's better with power tools?

    These things shouldn't be defined by sex.

    stop trolling - the girl said 'she thinks', its obvious some couples enjoy the traditional roles in a relationship and some like non-traditional

    theres not one way to run a relationship, just like theres not one way to run a company or country

    He's just upset because his "the more I like you post" didn't get included in your quote..

    :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:
  • MrsCon40
    MrsCon40 Posts: 2,351 Member
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    I think the wife should clean the home and take care of the children. I think they should alternate days on cooking and dishes. And the man should cut the grass, and take of the things that need to fixed, hung ect.

    What if he enjoys cleaning? (some people do. Weird, I know.)
    What if he's better with kids than she is?
    What if one of them enjoys cooking more? Or one can burn boiling water?
    What if she enjoys mowing the lawn?
    What if she's better with power tools?

    These things shouldn't be defined by sex.

    stop trolling - the girl said 'she thinks', its obvious some couples enjoy the traditional roles in a relationship and some like non-traditional

    theres not one way to run a relationship, just like theres not one way to run a company or country


    how is she trolling if she is explaining her thoughts?

    i think her thoughts have been shared by countless other people throughout the 3 pg's in this thread - lets be honest here, theres really only 2 sides of this coin. you're either for it or against it - anything else you're just trolling, whats the point?

    Disagreeing =/= trolling

    There aren't only two sides to this coin and the 3 pages of posts here shows that. She has the right to express her opinions on the subject just as you do.
  • stormieweather
    stormieweather Posts: 2,549 Member
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    No, there wasn't a two-sided COIN presented for voting. The title of the thread is Role of the Sexes. People believe different things, thats ok. If you put YOUR opinion out there, be prepared to hear opposition as well as agreement.
  • I_give_it_2_u_str8
    I_give_it_2_u_str8 Posts: 680 Member
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    "yes, it is obvious that some couples enjoy traditional roles...but based off of her comment she "thinks" that it should be that way in all households. She did not say "in most households" or "it depends on the couple" she said she "thinks" women should do "womanly" things and men should do "manly" things"

    and...?

    @bry_all: i have no idea what you're talking about

    @kevinlynch3: yes. devastated
  • I_give_it_2_u_str8
    I_give_it_2_u_str8 Posts: 680 Member
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    @mrscon40: no the 3 pg's of posts dont prove that. they prove ppl's incomprehension of the issue at stake, and about every strawman argument you can imagine. all missing the point

    @stormieweather: ok...
  • digitalsinner
    digitalsinner Posts: 165
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    3 pg's of posts dont prove that. they prove ppl's incomprehension of the issue at stake

    I find it ironic that you called someone else a troll.
  • I_give_it_2_u_str8
    I_give_it_2_u_str8 Posts: 680 Member
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    3 pg's of posts dont prove that. they prove ppl's incomprehension of the issue at stake

    I find it ironic that you called someone else a troll.

    haha me too
    a trolls calling is the highest honour i can ask for :P
  • iamrobyn
    iamrobyn Posts: 85
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    I've never been married, but I was in a long term 'living in sin relatoinship' for 5 years. What I learned that relationship is that the behaviors you establish in the begining tend to carry on throughout the relationship. Changing the dynamics is harder then I had expected. I for some reason really enjoyed taking car of almost everything in the begining, and when I decided I no longer wanted to do that it became an issue. I also think when the woman makes more $$ than the man it adds a twist that makes things even more complicated.

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