A question for men...girls can give opinion too! :D

jenvens
jenvens Posts: 159 Member
edited October 2 in Chit-Chat
I am a single mom and have been single for almost 2 years after my divorce...dating is a nightmare and I have totally given up on men...completely...

The dating scene is so super messed up and I can't help but wonder: Do guys prefer a thin *****y girl or a sweet curvy woman?

I know that I have a lot of weight to lose, but I also feel that I am pretty and proportionate, but guys still look at my like that fat chick and won't even give me a second glance. Then they all fall over themselves for "skinny girls" that are air-headed, *****y, materialistic and fake. Don't attack me because I am stereotyping...because it gets done to me EVERY effing day...

I'm just looking for men's real opinions...so that I know if I should totally give up or if I just haven't met a nice guy yet...

Thanks!
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Replies

  • MrsCon40
    MrsCon40 Posts: 2,351 Member
    Every man has a unique opinion - asking if they all like skinny or curvy is like asking them what their favorite color is...
  • taso42_DELETED
    taso42_DELETED Posts: 3,394 Member
    Every man has a unique opinion - asking if they all like skinny or curvy is like asking them what their favorite color is...

    black
  • bethmakesmusic
    bethmakesmusic Posts: 164 Member
    Hey friend,

    I wasn't a stick when I met my hubby and he FOR SURE is NOT into skinny girls who are a pain in the butt. He likes laid back and caring. Boobies dont hurt either though! Lol! Hang in there. They're not all jerks!!
  • rml_16
    rml_16 Posts: 16,414 Member
    Every man has a unique opinion - asking if they all like skinny or curvy is like asking them what their favorite color is...

    Exactly.

    One of my best friends is almost 300 pounds (after losing quite a bit of weight) and very sweet. She has a wonderful, loving husband.
  • anubis609
    anubis609 Posts: 3,966 Member
    Every man has a unique opinion - asking if they all like skinny or curvy is like asking them what their favorite color is...

    black

    Blue.
  • TDGee
    TDGee Posts: 2,209 Member
    Bee yourself.
  • d2footballJRC
    d2footballJRC Posts: 2,684 Member
    People just have an easier time seeing the negatives. You are pretty. Most likely you have guys that agree with me around you, it's just harder to spot then the d-bags who make themselves known.
  • ninerbuff
    ninerbuff Posts: 48,974 Member
    Could be from where you're hanging out at. For me, it's about curves, but definitely about attitude. I like confidence, strength and compassion. Of course that's just me.
  • EmilyAnn89
    EmilyAnn89 Posts: 564 Member
    there is someone for everyone! with that being said, not all guys like the same things. some like curvy, some like skinny, some like tall, some like short. you just have to find the right person who will love you for you :)
  • TDGee
    TDGee Posts: 2,209 Member
    Every man has a unique opinion - asking if they all like skinny or curvy is like asking them what their favorite color is...

    black

    Blue.

    What, like gaspers?
  • JDMarlowe
    JDMarlowe Posts: 327 Member
    My honest opinion
    I prefer a woman to be curvy....I would prefer not to be able to check for a fractured bone without an x-ray, LOL. But on the flip side, I prefer her to also be healthy so we can enjoy a healthy lifestyle together. After all, who else to enjoy a healthy lifestyle than your partner ??!!
  • neva4saken
    neva4saken Posts: 300 Member
    i personally do not think you've met the right guy yet, I think you should just focus on self repair and not worry about dating at the moment .. as for the question of preference I prefer curves to anything else but it's preference and you have to also look at the quality of man that is running after the "airheads" versus your marketability. Never base your value on what is not attracted to you, if a man is attracted to someone that seems like they have no mind of their own will not call them airheads that mean the man is shallow not the woman .. be yourself and be the best you that you can be do not focus on trying to attract anything but happy ... i've dated small to big and the thing that stand out the most to me is a woman heart when a man a real man gets tired of the games and the superficial things that is what they will start searching for and then you will become the sunshine that rise on his face in the morning and the moonlight that sets on his eyes at night .. enjoy life and life will enjoy you .. hope this helped (some may disagree but your are asking for personal point of view)
  • routerguy666
    routerguy666 Posts: 188
    How long do you have to put up with the *****iness in this scenario? :p
  • neva4saken
    neva4saken Posts: 300 Member
    My honest opinion
    I prefer a woman to be curvy....I would prefer not to be able to check for a fractured bone without an x-ray, LOL.


    that is funny lol
  • PandaofDestruction
    PandaofDestruction Posts: 114
    You haven't met the right guy yet! My husband prefers curvy girls...they are out there! You are beautiful from what I can see on your profile pic and just know that when you find someone who really appreciates everything you have to offer him, it will all fall into place. Sometimes it is hard meeting a good guy in a setting with so much stimulation, they sometimes seem to get sidetracked, so a club or a bar where there is supposed "eye candy" may not be the best place, of course they are falling all over the skinny girl is a** hugging booty shorts shaking everything she has looking as easy as a driving test...she is not a challenge, you my dear are a rare rose who needs to be treated with kindness and respect, many guys don't want a challenge, your prince charming is out there! Have faith :)
  • Enforcer25
    Enforcer25 Posts: 350 Member
    I am married now, but if looking I would want a girl who is in shape, she doesn't have to be skinny, a sense of humor and good conversationalist is a big plus too. Good luck in your quest, from the other posts I read, the dating scene sucks, I'm glad I'm not in that.
  • SusanRenee35
    SusanRenee35 Posts: 182 Member
    it sounds like to me that you are hanging around the places where boys hang out & not men.

    yes there are the skinny lovers but real men love curves & shape & as I call, juicyness :P

    you could always give girls a whirl if you are done with men & open to that :P

    women can be just as good and even better at times :) best of luck! :tongue:
  • infamousmk
    infamousmk Posts: 6,033 Member
    It's all about who you are. I was always the biggest girl in the room, and I got a lot of dates. Smile, be friendly, don't play games, ask a guy about himself .... dating is a rough sport, but if you have the right skills you'll win. Those skills have very little to do with the size of your *kitten*.
  • SCC88
    SCC88 Posts: 215 Member
    Before when I was 210lbs with a pretty face, long hair and an hourglass shape I used to get men pestering me at work all the time - sometimes even sexual abuse :explode:

    Now that I'm 160lbs with short hair, all i get is "wow you look much better" - but no advances! WHATS THAT ALL ABOUT! Not that I'm looking because I'm in a happy long term relationship, but still! lol. There are sooooo many different conclusions to this also.

    + am i more likely to just "take" sexual abuse because im a big fat fatty?
    + am I less approachable now that i am smaller?
    + are men just more attracted to larger people than skinny people? -OR-
    + do they think you're fat so i should just be greatful? :noway:
  • PandaofDestruction
    PandaofDestruction Posts: 114
    It's all about who you are. I was always the biggest girl in the room, and I got a lot of dates. Smile, be friendly, don't play games, ask a guy about himself .... dating is a rough sport, but if you have the right skills you'll win. Those skills have very little to do with the size of your *kitten*.

    Love this and it is true!
  • Ruchell
    Ruchell Posts: 236 Member
    Just a suggestion, but maybe you are looking in the wrong places? I would assume that guys in bars or clubs (I don't know where you are getting this done to you, so sorry if I'm assuming wrong) are probably less concerned with a sweet personality and more concerned with body image because they are looking for a lay--what do they care if someone is snotty, they won't have to deal with them past breakfast the next day! On another note, the type of guys who would pass you up based on your weight aren't the quality guys you'd really want anyway!

    P.s.--I get that you're angry but I've met plenty of skinny gals who are super sweet and bigger ladies who are b's!
  • rml_16
    rml_16 Posts: 16,414 Member
    it sounds like to me that you are hanging around the places where boys hang out & not men.

    yes there are the skinny lovers but real men love curves & shape & as I call, juicyness :P

    I have a friend who's effortlessly stick skinny -- even after having two children and she's in her late 30s. I'm pretty sure her husband, who is a great guy and most definitely what I consider a "real man" is attracted to her.
  • ChantalGG
    ChantalGG Posts: 2,404 Member
    I felt the same when i started dating after i broke up with my ex, i wasnt over weight i was actually smaller than i am now by 10 lbs. Just work on yourself, making you and your life better and things will fall into place. Also get some confidence (if you havnt already) and show it but not in the way that you would take a guy home the first time meeting him. Guys want a challenge too so let them come to you. I hated dating all the men out there were terrible lol, good luck.
  • Carl01
    Carl01 Posts: 9,307 Member
    Sweet and curvy.
    I like hips and a butt and but more importantly a lady that is easy to talk to and is nice.
  • bry_all01
    bry_all01 Posts: 3,100 Member
    its all about confidence, I'm pretty sure.
  • kenzietea
    kenzietea Posts: 614 Member
    It depends on where you live, where you are looking, and what type of men you are attracted to. Although it may still seem taboo to some, maybe try online dating. Men will message you knowing you are curvier and you can also pre-screen what type of man YOU are looking for. It also cuts a lot of the work out, they will already know you have a child and know you are working on fitness, etc. I met my fiance on an online dating site before I lost 30 lbs, he loved me then and still loves me now :) Just be safe and meet in public the first few times!
  • bluebird321
    bluebird321 Posts: 733 Member
    A woman can be curvy or thin. It really is about her attitude and personality.
  • LeeKetty1176
    LeeKetty1176 Posts: 881 Member
    a REAL woman with REAL curves will do it any day of the week and twice on Sundays !
  • jenvens
    jenvens Posts: 159 Member
    You haven't met the right guy yet! My husband prefers curvy girls...they are out there! You are beautiful from what I can see on your profile pic and just know that when you find someone who really appreciates everything you have to offer him, it will all fall into place. Sometimes it is hard meeting a good guy in a setting with so much stimulation, they sometimes seem to get sidetracked, so a club or a bar where there is supposed "eye candy" may not be the best place, of course they are falling all over the skinny girl is a** hugging booty shorts shaking everything she has looking as easy as a driving test...she is not a challenge, you my dear are a rare rose who needs to be treated with kindness and respect, many guys don't want a challenge, your prince charming is out there! Have faith :)

    Awesome! Thanks!
  • kenzietea
    kenzietea Posts: 614 Member
    My honest opinion
    I prefer a woman to be curvy....I would prefer not to be able to check for a fractured bone without an x-ray, LOL. But on the flip side, I prefer her to also be healthy so we can enjoy a healthy lifestyle together. After all, who else to enjoy a healthy lifestyle than your partner ??!!

    Yes sir! You can still be healthy and at a normal body weight and still have curves!
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