Do your friends have a right to judge you….and you, them?

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  • kevinlynch3
    kevinlynch3 Posts: 287 Member
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    and winner for most controversial poster goes to........ drum roll, please................................................ OP!!! :drinker:

    You contributed nothing here.

    Pretty judgemental and a bit snarky of you I would say...and ironic given the title of the post on the judgement of others photos.
  • jetscreaminagain
    jetscreaminagain Posts: 1,130 Member
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    and winner for most controversial poster goes to........ drum roll, please................................................ OP!!! :drinker:

    You contributed nothing here.

    Ouch. That's not nice. What did you contribute?
  • kevinlynch3
    kevinlynch3 Posts: 287 Member
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    If more than one person told me something unflattering about a photo I had posted....I'd listen..probably be a little offended inititally..get over it..then change it.
  • ajbeans
    ajbeans Posts: 2,857 Member
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    "Do your friends have a right to judge you?"

    Yes. Everyone has a right to judge. We all judge. It's part of being a human, and it's what helps us decide what we want for our own lives.

    However, I do not feel that we are entitled to voice those judgments or act on them. You don't like a picture of someone, that's fine. You don't have to. But you keep your mouth shut, unless you are directly asked for your opinion. You don't like what someone is wearing? Fine, don't buy one for yourself. But again, you don't mention it unless you're asked. It's not a bad thing to formulate judgments in your mind. But it IS a bad thing to let those judgments color the way you behave and treat other people, whether it's friends or strangers or whoever.
  • kennethmgreen
    kennethmgreen Posts: 1,759 Member
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    I like walnuts.
  • bonjour24
    bonjour24 Posts: 1,119 Member
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    i'd tell them. and hope they would tell me in return. it's like having something in your teeth- you'd want to know wouldn't you? well, i would.

    eta- it also depends on who this person is- if i didn't know them too well i prob wouldn't say anything about their pic. they put it there. if i knew them well enough, then i would say.

    and everyone judges everyone else. it's human nature. we all make judgements and assumptions all the time.
  • lilRicki
    lilRicki Posts: 4,555 Member
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    Nope, I'd keep my trap shut...it's none of my damn business and I don't want to offend anyone and start stupid drama...likewise, if I put the picture up, it's not an invitation to shoot your mouth off. Keep it to yourself and we'll all get along fine. But if there's something in my teeth, please tell me, and if you ask me if that outfit makes you look like a hoe, I'm going to tell you the truth.
  • adrian_indy
    adrian_indy Posts: 1,444 Member
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    I have Facebook and I have MFP, they do not intermingle. To my FB friends and family, I am still a big guy. My pictures, even the newest ones where I have lost weight, are still big and unflattering. But on MFP, in a supportive setting where people can see my before and midway pics, I am a 49 pound loser, a success story. The mindsets are different.

    Also, the way in which a critique is given is important. A good friend will say you look fine if you don't. A great friend will tell you the truth in a polite way and give you ideas on how to do it better.