Stupid questions you hear in customer service.
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"I thought they stopped making asbestos."0
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"Hi I'm looking for a book I saw the other day."
"Ok what's the title and or author?"
"Oh I don't know"
"Where did you see it?"
"Oh it was an older book at a friend's house, I think it was blue."
"what was the topic?"
"Oh I'm not sure, it may have been fiction, or non-fiction."
"Hi, I'm looking for a book with cutting edge research on lowering cholesterol-it's really important for my husband's health. What do you suggest?"
"I suggest you talk to a doctor/nutritionist."
"Doctors don't know anything, I was wondering what you thought."
"Well, as a bookstore employee I am very qualified to be giving medical advice..."
Don't remind me!
"Was it fiction or non-fiction?"
"Yes"
"Do you know the author?"
"I think it might be a man"
"Where did you see this book?"
"It was on tv last year"
I found the damn book as well.0 -
Working in a council call centre.
Midnight - New Years Eve
Caller: There are a lot of fireworks going on outside, it's very loud and I want to complain.
Me: Fireworks are permitted until 2am today as it's New Years Eve
Caller: I don't care, its too loud and they should be banned
Me: I can't take a complain as they are allowed until 2am on NYE If they continue after that you can call back
Caller: NO I want you to stop them now.
Etc for a few minutes
FFS - called on the dot on midnight - everyone else having a naughty drink and I'm taking to an idiot. :grumble:
I have loads of these as you can sadly imagine. (not just noise)0 -
Customer: What is this finance charge on my statement?
CSR: It's the interest that posted for this month.
Customer: No one ever told me that they were going to charge me any interest to borrow money! Let me speak to your supervisor!0 -
This happened last week.
Customer: So, you're saying I can't return it because it's opened?
Cashier: That's our policy, ma'am.
Customer: But, it wasn't what I thought it was. I thought it was a DVD, not an audiobook.
Cashier: I'm sorry, ma'am.
Customer: Well, I didn't even really want it in the first place.
Cashier: Then why'd you buy it?
Customer: I don't know. ...Can I talk to a manager?0 -
Worked in the tourism industry for a number of years and got some real gems. I sadly can't remember them all (we used to record them on a board in the staff room :laugh:, but here are a couple of standouts:
Tourist: Are these prices in dollars?
Me: Yes, they are in Canadian dollars.
Tourist: What is the price in dollars?
Me: *guesses based on accent* In US currency?
Tourist: No. In dollars.
Me: Uh...in US dollars?
Tourist: *growing agitated* NO. IN DOLLARS.
Me: Are you from the USA?
Tourist: Yes.
Me: Okay. Then I'll tell you the price in the dollars that you use in the US.
Tourist: THANK you.
:noway:
Tourist: *pointing to carved totem poles* How do you get your trees to grow that way?
I thought it was a joke, but she was really disappointed when I explained that they were carved. :frown:
Tourist: Are these prices in Yen? (Wasn't aware that Japan and Canada had merged...)
Tourist: Can we make it to Prince Edward Island and back before dinner this evening? (That's about a 6000 km / 3750 mi drive...)
What's the Canadian word for dollar? :P0 -
I was a copier repair tech. Cust called with a code that affected a unit i worked on a week before.......VERY reliable, never any issues as long as preventive maintenance is done (did i say i did it a week before!?!) So i say is the large capacity tray plugged in, they never have issues unless the cable breaks and i replace it last week.
cust: yes it's plugged in do you think i am a F*%#ing idiot?
me: No sir I just know that unit is bullet proof and the plug for it is different then for the copier and is under the table, could you go check for me?
cust: Again I ask, do you think i am a f*%#ing idiot.
Me: No sir but since I am pretty sure this is the problem i am just trying to save you a $125 charge
cust: Just get over here
me: be there in 45 minutes.
me: I get there look at the unplugged tray, look at the girls by the copier and laugh, and ask I just got here and haven't touched a thing correct?
them: yes
me: walk to the complainant, and tell him i found the problem please come and see what happened.
WE: walk to the copier, and ask ladies, have i touched this machine? they say no! I crawl under the table and plug the unit in.....the tray lifts code clears!!! (NO **** I KNEW THAT) I look at the guy and ask Remember the question you asked me on the phone? The answer is yes you are!
His boss called my boss, I was in the office at the time and was asked to talk to him, I told him the story and the guy was gone when I went back!
BEST DAY OF MY LIFE! I got to tell a customer he was a f*&%$ing idiot with out saying it and my boss backed me up! YES!
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I used to be a waitress in a pub years ago. On the menu were 2 different sausage sandwiches that people always had a question about.
They'd ask: "What is the difference between the sweet sausage and the hot sausage?"
My answer: "The taste."
Alright, maybe you had to be there!0 -
I used to work at a grocery store in New York, and I had a man come up to me, 100% serious, and ask me 'Are we in Canada?'0
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I used to be a waitress in a pub years ago. On the menu were 2 different sausage sandwiches that people always had a question about.
They'd ask: "What is the difference between the sweet sausage and the hot sausage?"
My answer: "The taste."
Alright, maybe you had to be there!
One wears a bikini, the other compliments the one wearing a bikini...0 -
i worked at a truck stop just north of flint michigan and still can't believe how stupid people are when it comes to directions.
this couple once came in and asked how to get to cleveland ohio.
i asked them where they started out from and they said, 'toledo'.
i told them to go back home and turn left instead of right when they leave their driveway.
i would have thought the 'welcome to michigan' sign was their first clue that something was wrong.0 -
one night i was working with a white male, black female and i am a white female.
we all wore shirts with our company logo on the front.
a customer asked me if i worked there.
i told her, 'no, we're triplets and our mother dresses us alike'.
i detest working with the public.0 -
I work in retail. I'm not a cashier and I work on the floor. I love it when a customer comes up to me and asks "How much is this?" and expects me to know automatically. Do I look like a scanner to you? If I'm not familiar with the product I ALWAYS say "I don't know we'll have to take it up to a cashier so we can find out." I know that's probably not as stupid as it can get but it's just the expectation from the customer for the employee to automatically know..... It's a massive hardware store, does it look like I'm going to know the price of everything? Oh Yeah!!0
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one night i was working with a white male, black female and i am a white female.
we all wore shirts with our company logo on the front.
a customer asked me if i worked there.
i told her, 'no, we're triplets and our mother dresses us alike'.
i detest working with the public.
Haha! The public is an IDIOT!0 -
Emily_J_J LOL that is funny
I just had this
Cust: I have a file that is missing can you restore it for me
ME: okay where is the location of the file
Cust: I don't know
Me: then how do you know it is missing?
Cust:Because it is not there
Me: It is not where, if you tell me where it was i can find it and restore it from yesterday
Cust: I don't know where it was
Me: Then again how do you know it is gone?
Cust: Never mind i found it
Me: Where did you find it?
Cust: In the file
Me: Have a good day sir
"The files are IN the computer???"
So hot right now...0 -
BUMP0
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CUSTOMER : WHO ARE YOU PEOPLE WHAT DO YOU DO
AGENT: EXPLAINS
CUSTOMER WELL WHY YA'ALL CALLING ME FOR?
AGENT: SIR YOU CALLED US WE NEVER CALLED YOU
CUSTOMER O WELL DONT LET IT HAPPEN AGAIN!
AGENT : YES SIR!0 -
Customer's who were insistent that they didn't have to pay collection bills if they didn't receive a copy of the bill. (If that's all it takes to wipe out consumer debt...well, damn, I've been doing it wrong!)
Hotel guests who lie about the cleanliness of rooms in order to get free stuff. (**** rolls downhill, yo - and after the chewing out we WILL clean your table with the same rag we cleaned your toilet with!)
Oh, so many. Just so many.0 -
Had a customer complain about finding french on the back of his receipt.
I wasn't too sure how to handle it considering I live in Canada and we're a bilingual country. French is mandatory.0 -
when I worked at a corner store a young guy comes in leaving the girl he was with to wait ouside.
guy: where are the condoms
me: that aisle (pointing)
guy: (after stairing at the small selection for a few minutes) do you have any in extra small?
no joke. I considered telling the poor girl waiting outside the door that she should just go home, he's not worth it.
customer: what kind of pizza is there?
me: pepperoni, hawaiian and supreme
customer: can I get a cheese pizza?
me: no, we only have pepperoni hawaiian and supreme
customer: ok, can I get a meat lovers?
me: -blank stare-
I hated working customer service0
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