For women: "Your husband must be happy..."

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deniseg31
deniseg31 Posts: 667 Member
in Chit-Chat
Since people have started noticing my weight loss I have gotten these comments and I don't really know how to take them.

"Well, your husband must be happy."

"I bet your husband must be thrilled with your weight loss."

"ooooh I bet your man is finally happy!!!!"

I can say that these people don't know my husband and he seemed pretty happy with me before. I decided to change for me, not to please him. He is very proud of me and he is happy for my accomplishment but somehow it seems like people think that he wasn't happy with me before because I was very overweight. Maybe I'm overreacing but this comment really bugs me.

Have people made similar comments to any of you ladies??
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Replies

  • igora_soma
    igora_soma Posts: 486
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    Those comments aren't very nice...

    Most people I know have said "wow, you look REALLY different" lol! I'm kind of glad that they haven't made comments relating to my boyfriend's happiness, although I guess it's different when you're married.

    52 lbs is amazing! :)
  • emaline614
    emaline614 Posts: 86 Member
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    i hope these people aren't your friends... i think that is SO rude and I wouldn't know how to take it either.

    you should be doing this for yourself and no one else... next time, just tell them that YOU are finally happy... and that's all that matters.
  • TaraFTMVA
    TaraFTMVA Posts: 309 Member
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    Thats ridiculous!!! Like you can't change for yourself and like your husband is that shallow! Id be irritated too tbh.....not overreacting at all
  • goelvira
    goelvira Posts: 54 Member
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    Ditto! I've decided to lose weight for myself not for my hubby! My husband has always been happy with me and the way I look, and he'll be even happier to see me feel better about myself once I DO get down to the size I want to be. ;-)
  • Jorra
    Jorra Posts: 3,338 Member
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    I can understand why you would be upset with that. People don't realize that their "compliment" implies that your husband didn't enjoy you before...of course he did, he married you!
  • drog2323
    drog2323 Posts: 1,386 Member
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    i think sometimes people don't know what to say...so at times, what they mean as a compliment sometimes doesn't come out exactly as intended.

    I regularly have my foot inserted into my mouth.
  • ChitownFoodie
    ChitownFoodie Posts: 1,562 Member
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    Nah....I usually get "I am jealous of your boyfriend!" That one makes the both of us smile
  • Jess3kids
    Jess3kids Posts: 62 Member
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    I get those comments from my mother-in-law! Ugh!
  • Sherbog
    Sherbog Posts: 1,072 Member
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    You are not overacting. Try finding new positive type people to surround yourself with. You will be surprised how much positive enery helps on your "get healthy" journey.
  • fitmommy2012
    fitmommy2012 Posts: 451 Member
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    Since people have started noticing my weight loss I have gotten these comments and I don't really know how to take them.

    "Well, your husband must be happy."

    "I bet your husband must be thrilled with your weight loss."

    "ooooh I bet your man is finally happy!!!!"

    I can say that these people don't know my husband and he seemed pretty happy with me before. I decided to change for me, not to please him. He is very proud of me and he is happy for my accomplishment but somehow it seems like people think that he wasn't happy with me before because I was very overweight. Maybe I'm overreacing but this comment really bugs me.

    Have people made similar comments to any of you ladies??

    :huh: WHAT! Thats freaking awful! I cannot believe that someone would actually say that to you! WOW! Some people! I am the same as you, even though I am overweight, my husband still loves me just the way I am. He loved me when I was thin and he loves me now that I am fat! (lol) - I just can't believe that people would really say things like that!

    That sure puts a damper on the excitement that you have about losing the weight! Geesh! Dont worry about it though, just remember why you are really doing it and ignore stupid people out there, cause belive me, there are MANY of them! :grumble:
  • suz74
    suz74 Posts: 77 Member
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    not forgetting...wow! Your hubby must feel like he's got a new woman!
    I try not to take them the wrong way but sometimes it's hard! And yes he didn't have a problem with the woman he had before because....I'm still me!!!
  • chefchazz
    chefchazz Posts: 427
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    I get those comments from my mother-in-law! Ugh!

    eww
  • smbugi
    smbugi Posts: 35
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    YES!! I'm down almost 80 lbs. and I get these comments frequently and I HATE IT! My husband has never made a big issue of my weight. I wasn't skinny when he asked me to marry him and my weight has gone up and down the last 12 years we've been married. He loves me for me and doesn't emphasize my weight loss. People can be very shallow - either that or THEY are married to men who emphasize their looks constantly. Hang in there and keep on losing for YOU!! :happy:
  • thesmellofapples
    thesmellofapples Posts: 287 Member
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    had your husband not been happy with you before he wouldn't have married you...

    i don't know. personally i think it sounds rude but maybe those people think they're giving a compliment. i wouldn't sweat it too hard.
  • deniseg31
    deniseg31 Posts: 667 Member
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    No, these people aren't my friends...they are co-workers and acquaintances...not close to me. Ok. I’m glad you all don’t think I’m not over reacting. This has just been on my mind since the first time I heard it so I was like WTH :noway: is up with that comment?

    Thanks girls! You are all doing wonderful…keep it up!
  • MrsCon40
    MrsCon40 Posts: 2,351 Member
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    Why don't you just try to take it as a compliment and not interpret it as a backhanded insult?

    :flowerforyou:
  • fitmommy2012
    fitmommy2012 Posts: 451 Member
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    I get those comments from my mother-in-law! Ugh!

    Yeah I have had my time with that too....my mother-in-law LOVES to share with me how thin she was when she was pregnant and how she dropped her pregnancy weight so fast compared to me. And how she never had to buy maternity clothes...yeah it gets on my nerves. :grumble: I would love to slap her sometimes, I know thats not kind, but really! I mean we are NOT the same people, and she was severly depressed and in an abusive relationship while she was pregnant too! :indifferent: SO seriously, she wasnt healthy!!

    Oh and now she is obese, I mean morbidly obese...so really she has no reason to talk to me!
  • stephiejones
    stephiejones Posts: 54
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    Yes I get comments all the time, He never mind my size before as far as I know because we got togeather the size i was, and after nearly 30 lbs he told me a few days ago FINALLY he noticed i was loosing weight, then told me you know you don't need too loose much more, i just laughed and told him im doing this for me and i will know when i am going to stop and maintain...I love that man i call my husband! People are so cruel sometimes.
  • saffronblue
    saffronblue Posts: 79 Member
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    Ugh! I haven't gotten this -YET! But, it has happened before. I can only say, you know he was happy before your weight loss...
  • LorinaLynn
    LorinaLynn Posts: 13,247 Member
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    I could have written your post word for word! "Your husband must be thrilled!" He was thrilled with me before!

    But the thing that does thrill him is how much more comfortable I am being nekkid.
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