My 12 yr old daughter wants to be on MFP

RockHardAngel_777

I only read some of these "answers" to your post. And let me just say I'm sorry darlin. Some people! I swear some people forget we are on here to Help and Encourge. Oh my goodness. You do what you feel is right darlin. (no wonder I keep my "friends"to a very minimum) sometimes you just don't want some people's "advice". ;(

CityOnAHill

Personally I'd say pounce on this opportunity to teach your daughter about eating healthy! I know I would have appreciated it if my parents had taught me better as they raised me (I still love them so!). Just set it to make sure she doesn't lose weight. I'd supervise it.

This. If you supervise. Yes, the site if for those over 18. That said; learning the good habits WITH YOU would be a great bonding experience and she would learn the good habits now.

InvictusPheonix

Maybe have her just count her fruits and veggies? (like, try for the appropriate number of servings a day)
12 is wayyy to young.
Just a warning to those out there with kids- my mom was a "yo yo dieter" most of my life, and it gave me some pretty messed up ideas about nutrition. It was just how I was raised. I just thought that was normal.
It wasn't until I moved away that I learned there IS a balance, you can be conscious about what you eat without being black or white "on or off" a diet.
Be careful, what you do, even if it's to "get healthy and keep up" with your kids, impacts them more than you know.

Beastette

I would get her a non-Internet based program like Diet and Exercise Assistant by Keyoe if you are committed to letting her learn about calorie counting. No forums...

aeisenhut

Would it really hurt to teach her how to start counting calories? She doesn't need to be on here to lose weight she can maintain a healthy weight. I say if she is serious about it to let her try it for a week. If she wants to continue just let her. I wouldn't let her get too concerned about what she is eating though. Tell her that she can have those pop tarts but in moderation.

trishlambert

My two cents (if you need more cents! laugh!!):

If you do decide to go for it, up the ante by making it a calorie counter in AND out. In other words, stress the exercise side of the equation. There are a lot of people on here who are in great shape and who use MFP to continue to improve their health and strength. Look for those people and see what they have to say about using the site.

Also, another ante upper is to require tracking more than general calories, but other key nutrients. Make an agreement re: carb/fat/protein calies she will budget and track, and come up with rewards/penalties so that there are consequences for her adherence or nonadherence to the agreement.

Since she doesn't actually have a weight issue, limit the number of pounds lost she programs into MFP...like 1/2 pound per week or maintenance. If she wants to change her shape, refer her back to the exercise of the equation.

garlic7girl

I think the best thing a parent can do is show love (action), and be an example (action), and do things together (action again) which promote health and enjoyment...key enjoyment not punitive or in judgement.
For example, I used to work in a high school with teens and I would watch them eat the most horrific things...esp in the morning...huggables (blue drinks) and Funions or chips and etc. So, I would bring my breakfast and lunch to work and they would come and eat with me sometimes and see what I had...carrots, wheat bread, apples etc and then it HAPPENED...."can I have a piece" "can I try" Gasp! That is a small example but that is what kids do to change...what they SEE :noway: thier parents and other adult figures do. Tell her also being a kid has some benefits and that is freedom...freedom from counting calories and FREEDOM to be healthy all on her own POWER! YAAAAAAAAAAAY!!!!!!!!!!!!

bluecal822

Have your daughter join a sports team, and encourage her to eat healthier, DO NOT let her on this site. At that age this site could easily help trigger an eating disorder.

Focus on eating heathy and not on weight.

Make sure that you tell your daughter how pretty she is. When I was her age, even though I was pretty skinny, I though that I was fat and ugly, because I didn't look that the women in the media. I would not at all be surprised if your daughter feels this way either. Every girl that I know, and even my 5'6 105 lb friend thinks that they are fat.

bluecal822

It sounds like she is starting to get a bit body conscious, as others stated she is too young to join, and I think teaching her to track calories, especially as she is about to hit HS is going to set her up for ED's and obsessive calorie counting.

Right now, just sit her down and have a talk with her about basic good vs bad food, and how to read nutrition labels so she can decide whether or not she should really eat something. Focus on things like high sodium, high sugar content, heavily processed foods, this will set her up to eat healthy instead of just eat based on calories. Talk to her about how anything that comes from a box and often times from a bottle (excluding bottled water and tea of course), is probably something thats going to be heavily processed with lots of sodium or sugar. Make sure she knows that sodium and sugar are not necessarily bad but that she should only eat a limited amount of those things. Teach her that when she is really hungry she can eat several plates of veggies and it wont be anywhere near as damaging as something like a hot pocket. Teach her portions and that junk food is just fine in moderation.

If you want to talk about her weight you can do that as well, talk about how much she weighs and what a healthy weight range is for her, make sure she knows she is in a healthy weight range, and does not need to loose a bunch of weight. Talk to her about muscle vs fat and how someone who is say 120lbs with a higher fat percent can appear to be much bigger than someone who is 120lbs who is more toned. Express how excercise can help her to shrink sizes even if her weight itself doesnt go down a whole lot.

Finally, are you excercising? Ask her if she wants to set up an excercise routine with you for the two of you to do a few times a week. There is nothing bad about her getting down excercise routines this early in life instead of waiting until she is older and trying to figure it all out on her own. But since her body is still a developing body just keep the excercises light/moderate and of course try and keep them fun. Sports would help as well.

No, you never talk to children, especially girls this age about losing weight. I know WAY to many girls who, after a very well-meaning conversation from their parents about losing a little weight developed eating disorders.