If you could tell that ONE coworker SOMETHING....

Stacera

I don't want to sit at your desk and train you on the new system b/c your desk is sticky and your keyboard crunches because all you do is eat there!!! I'm afraid of what your home looks like from seeing your desk and NO I don't want to eat any of the food you bring to work.

(diff coworker) you're a pig, we know your trick of trying to rub against the women in the elevator that's why i stepped back this morning and you lost your footing and hit the wall. The nasty degrading things you say about women in the building is being noted.

(diff person) quit being such a *kitten*!! just friggin stop!

tgh1914

Take a bath for crying out loud! You stink! Yes, I know there are cultural differences & all. But when you work with other people who have working olfactory systems, or worse - with clients sometimes - you have to do something about that BO!!!

nikki778

I would say
"UGH BE QUIET BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAAAAHHHHHH
I DON'T CARE JUST LET ME DO MY WORK"

RyanDanielle5101

Sorry Mr. Princess but no one understands why as man you HAVE to get your hair cut every fu*cking Thursday at the same time? FYI It doesn't look any different when you get back. Also, STOP INTERUPTING ME DURING A CONVERSATION YOU ARE NOT INVOLVED IN. You are a douche bag that hates women but you act like one, make up your f-ing mind.

KelliHatfield1

Stop picking your nose and wiping it on everything, close your mouth when you eat, flush the frig'n toilet, don't leave your **** all over the place! I'm a stay at home mom, my coworkers are my children!

Funny! :laugh:

complete_tease

Please sit down and shut the **** up. No your job is not the most important. No you are not supposed to monitor what everyone is doing. No everyone that works here is not ****ing stupid. Yes you are in fact the problem 99% of the time.

skinnywithin

that I am going to stick that celine dion cd up her *kitten*!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

chocolateandvodka

if you touch me one more time i will punch you in your face.

chocolateandvodka

Sorry Mr. Princess but no one understands why as man you HAVE to get your hair cut every fu*cking Thursday at the same time? FYI It doesn't look any different when you get back. Also, STOP INTERUPTING ME DURING A CONVERSATION YOU ARE NOT INVOLVED IN. You are a douche bag that hates women but you act like one, make up your f-ing mind.

$5 says it's not a hair appt - that sounds like therapy, a mistress or something sinister... i wanna know!!!!

_Ben

Turn off the ringer on your phone, stop talking to your friends on the phone while Im trying to help 7 customers at once by myself

summer827

Get to the point already.

BHAK

I know you have been working here for 75 yrs...I DON"T GIVE A $#!+...and another thing...when you come back from a smoke break you F*****G STINK TO HOLY HELL!!!!!!!!

RyanDanielle5101

Sorry Mr. Princess but no one understands why as man you HAVE to get your hair cut every fu*cking Thursday at the same time? FYI It doesn't look any different when you get back. Also, STOP INTERUPTING ME DURING A CONVERSATION YOU ARE NOT INVOLVED IN. You are a douche bag that hates women but you act like one, make up your f-ing mind.

$5 says it's not a hair appt - that sounds like therapy, a mistress or something sinister... i wanna know!!!!

I swear that is what he is doing. I get my hair done at the same place he does and the girls at the salon all think it is weird too:) He has a gf so I *think* he likes girls but all he needs is a lisp and I wouldn't believe the gf story:)

DannyMussels

To nearly everyone there:

"if i drank all the time, i'd have the body of a person who drank all the time - like you."


Boom!



*the above statement doesn't take into consideration the amount of physical activity done daily/on the regular of the targeted individual to which the statement was directed. in addition to that, nobody i work with works out, so i attribute their amazing physiques to the fact that they 'party' all the time....and rarely mention they attempt to exercise.

BethanieK

Please get sterilized, the world has enough idiots.

awdhemi

OMG have you you got the same collegue as me LOL!

I think I might.

I want to tell another coworker tonight that I've heard the booger in their nose whistling for the past 3 hours and I've just about had it. Seriously, who whistles with their nose for THAT LONG and just doesn't pay attention!?!?!?!?!?!

OMG!!! This made me laugh so hard, I was crying. I was trying to read it aloud to my staff, and kept getting stuck at the word booger, it took me over 5 minutes to read this, LOL!!!

Learning2LoveMe

This thread is way too awesome, funny & true.

Here's mine (for the moment): I can smell you coming from a mile away and know where you have been in the office, LAY OFF THE COLOGNE!!! I gasp for air every time you walk by!

2_young_2B_old

If you don't stop whistling I'm going to beat you bloody until your momma cries, and then I'll beat her too, you pompous, misogynistic, idiotic bast***!!!!

PegasusDeb

Uh oh... maybe I'm the one playing lousy music! lol

To my co-worker: Get over yourself, you aren't all that. And yes, you sure the hell are High Maintance! I'm sick of your whining & *****ing. It's your job STFU & do it, or move on (like you're always threatening to do!)

Hey, that did feel good! :happy:

PlanetVelma

I really don't care to hear your stories of "we used to do it THIS way" at your old place of employment. You are NOT in Kansas anymore, sweetheart!