When does the abuse stop?

DiamondInTheDirt

This happened to me and my friend...my friend infact is much more over weight than me, so im a lil smaller...and these..i dont know they were like 14 or 15 years old, and i dont know which one of us they said this to...but they shouted out fat panda.you fatty etc. and i was so hurt i wanted to curl up in a ball and die. but tbh...im looking at myself and thinking..i aint even fat. lol so i thought later on 'haters gonna hate'. From your pictures, youre not even fat, and even if anyone is overweight they dont deserve to be called such horrible things. I hope those two girls that said that ridiculous lie to you, i hope they get the taste of their own medicine. But i understand how you must feel, and you need to keep positive and speak to more girls! There are lovely girls in this world...dont let two stupid immature people ruint hat for you.

KarenWas

I experienced this many times when I was 100 lbs overweight. I just told myself that I'd show them when I was healthy and skinny. I always say revenge is a good motivator.

Yanicka1

heck, I am a size 4 and when I was running I once heard a guy say ...it<s only a fat one. They were looking at girls running on the bicycle path. Never stopped me going on that path and run. Do not let the *kitten* dictate your life.

butters1

I was out walking this evening and as a car drove passed one of the girls in it shouted fat ***** at me. This is not the first time this has happened in my life, 10 years ago i actually had a car stop in the street so that the people in it could shout abuse at me, it was shortly after this that i stopped going out and gained most of my weight.

I am at a point in my life now where I am trying to boost my confidence and start talking to girls, when things like this happen it does make me wonder if i should bother yet.

Anyone else had experience with abuse or bullying because of size?

Rich

Rich, in reponse to your question when does the abuse stop? It stops when you stop taking it as such :flowerforyou:

I had this happen recently on a jog/walk. Apparently a group of 4 teenage boys slowed way down so one in the back could hurl fat *** comments at me. Luckily they were going slow enough i could manage to hurl back at great big spitball right onto his lap. Then i informed the driver i knew exactly who his mom was (i don't) and they couldn't have driven away any faster. At the time all i could think was too bad, i was mad enough to teach them a real lesson:laugh:

Just mho, but most likely your insulters were just kids being stupid.

Leanne_fat2fab

I am so sorry that happened to you!! Some people will never know what it's like to struggle with your weight and confidence. I'm sure this isn't something that could be brushed off easily but some people just have no class, and no respect for others. There will always be people who judge you because of your weight. Once your happy with yourself and comfortable in your skin you could just look at them and see someone who needs to bring others down the make themselves feel better or show out to others. Ive been made fun of because of my weight ever since I was a little girl. It never got easier, until I realized the person who's making terrible comments about me is troubled. Troubled people look for other troubled people to bully. It's the sad truth, BUT everytime that happens I would let it simmer and boil and be sad because some stupid idiot was bored and wanted to pick on me. Those things WILL make you stronger! Don't ever lose hope!

i_love_vinegar

I think these people will pick on just about anyone, and I find it pathetic that these people only ever seem to be in "packs" and driving away in their cars (or picking on someone much physically weaker...aka me legal midget here).

I've had strangers pick on me throughout my life...from when I was a kid till this day. All ages, usually people older than me though -- kids are generally kind to me.

I hope I don't offend anyone by saying this, but the one thing that makes me feel better is that the people who have teased me usually look pretty darned bad (uneducated, poor, ugly).

There are a lot of horrible people out there. I have had guys block my path, follow me in their cars and cuss me out when I ignore them, women ram into me and give me nasty looks...Had a guy start laughing at me like I was stupid because I was speaking with someone at the front desk asking a question at my school. Had a woman old enough to be my mom start screaming at me for wearing a skirt. Some hobo said I was too pale. Another hobo said my hair was bad. In Japan had a group of guys, "Hellllooo" in English because I am white

Well...as you can see...
These people will make fun of you for ANYTHING. There is no getting away from it, and if they aren't making fun of you with words, they will harass you physically.

I would just use this as motivation to be "that guy they don't want to mess with." Good luck

ps: it makes me really upset too...i am very sensitive and will cry when i get home sometimes...just know that these people will pick on any little thing. Before braces i was made fun of for that. Ex made fun of me for having lines near my eyes when I smile...There is no escaping it...just when it happens...remember they are just trying to find any little thing...>.< And nobody is perfect...so they will always find a flaw...it does not mean you are ugly or something...>.<

i_love_vinegar

I'm sorry that this happened to you and I know how you feel. I remember leaving a party once and a guy just felt the need to say hey fat a**. I was never bothered by comments until that moment. If it is at all possible try to think of your weight loss journey as a game. super mario brothers perhaps...your objective is to save the prince (in your case) from diabetes, heart failure, etc but in order to do this you must eat healthier and exercise. this journey is not easy and the game has to give you distractions and fire breathing dragons that you must pass. the girl in the car was one of them. They want you to quit, give up, and lose focus so that you can't save the prince. well,,,step on their heads, jump over them, just like in the game to conquer your mission. even if you mess up, you still have another chance,

also to the other person who said that they don't run anymore,,,get back in the game.

Really well put. Thank you for sharing this!

daffodilsoup

People abuse others to feel better about themselves. Be the stronger person - you are doing this for you and it is a wonderful, positive thing. I know it hurts, but know that you are a better person than they are.

HealthyJess88

The fact is, kids are cruel and mean. They probably have been yelling that at everyone they pass, overweight or not. Don't take it personal, and don't let them make you feel that way. In 10 years they will be on MFP trying to figure out if they should be eating their exercise Calories.

I love this!

suegmune

Eh, little f*ckers are everywhere. Ignore them. Some people raise little sh*ts, and then they get in a group of people and they all become the same way. I always think people do this and other stupid *kitten* just to get attention. If they don't get the attention/response from you, they'll look for another target (someone skinny, someone in glasses, in a wheelchair, etc)...its just obnoxious. I really hope my kids never act this way. There is no need.

Just steer clear. You have better things to do and spend your time on. You've come a long way and you should be proud.

suegmune

Absolutely! When I first began trying to lose weight, I decided I would try to jog a little each day until I could go a mile. I had a car full of kids stop and tell me that I would give myself a black eye and start an earthquake if I didn't stop jogging.

That's because they were jealous of the girls!!!!! :P

teagin2002

When I was in college I lived in a rural area and collected cedar bows and sold them to companies that made christmas reefs for extra money. I did have a big *kitten*, still do. Every year I did it a truck would drive by and some guy yelled Fat *** at me as I am reaching for the boughs. This first two years I would get offended, but after that I took it as a complement.

skinnnyxoxo

I have been never called fat even when I was tipping the scales are 250 lbs.
However, people have called me things like anorexic, bulimic, and other means things when I lose about 50 lbs. Some were from family, too! I'm guessing that they were concerned but still! I have proof that I did it the healthy way, because I have YET to gain a pound back and girl I EAT!

emilycandoit

WOW> This is a heartbreaking post.
Im so sorry someone would treat you with such incredible disrespect.

This day in age, people are rude verbally, physically, emotionally- they drive angrily and cut people off, they flip people the middle finger, they swear--- they have NO manners whatsoever---- so though this kind of thing isnt shocking, its also considered bullying in repetition.

Great reminder to everyone- say nothing in jest that you wouldnt say in seriousness.

Again, SO sorry to you that you had to endure this.

NO excuse for anyone treating a person this way.

DONT QUIT on your goals!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Eventually you'll be shopping for the perfect friend or mate or buddy
and at that time, coming from your perspective, you'll have a GREAT radar for a quality person,
as opposed to a materialistic or superficial one.

God bless.