I don't care ENOUGH.

Umeboshi

Ume, I love you, but now you're just being flat out antagonistic. We get it, okay? But she's not making fun of her brother for being obese.

The majority of my posts have had approximately nothing to do with OP.

BS. You made it about yourself and the OP.

Who started asking about my urine again?

Who is being troll again?

I started out by stating if people are fat but have good blood/urine/phsyical shape, then so be it. Nothing anyone can say about it.

Then you started in with the rants and making it about YOURSELF. So I asked if YOUR numbers were good, then you can have that stance. If you numbers are BAD or if you DON'T KNOW your numbers, you ain't got jack to say. Plain and simple. Sorry to be direct but you're acting like a blame diverting troll.

Who was phone?

I agreed with that first point, though I didn't post a reply saying so.
I wasn't ever ranting or making things about myself, just replying to various replies people made to me. That's how forums work.
Did you miss the part where someone quoted my profile to try to invalidate my point? I mentioned things about myself only when THEY decided to make things about me instead of the point I was trying to make.

You entirely missed the fact that my main point was that health shaming isn't okay.
I don't know why you think that a person is only entitled to say whether health shaming is bad or not if their health is perfect.

Jeff92se

No one is talking about fat shaming or whatever the hell you are labeling it as.

You assinged your plight to the OP's brother, then took the comments personally.

Why shouldn't I use your profile? You took it personal before that

BTW. I thought you were "done" with this thread?

Umeboshi

Ignoring all the middle-thread arguments: one of the things that did contribute to my own "wake up" moment were my awesome husband and amazing kids. I wanted to make myself better as a person, partially to contribute more and set a better example for them.

Maybe the OP could gently show her brother there are other things in life? Get him out of the house without making it weight-loss oriented, get him to visit a park with nice (and gentle) walking trails and chitchat about other things, or even go out to the movies once every other week (and don't park as close as you can to the theatre, lol). Spend time with him as a person, give him a support instead of judgement, maybe even get him to play an offline 2player game with you. Challenge him to chess! Work on your relationship, not his girth.

Maybe he will realize in his own time that there are people who love him and value him, and worry about him, and just maybe it will inspire him to live a longer, healthier life.

Very good advice. Another good idea would be to invite your brother over for a healthy meal, or even prepare it together. Maybe he'll even want to start cooking those healthy foods at home

There really is no good way to get someone to make a decision to change or get healthier, because in order for it to really stick it has to come spontaneously and from within. But doing little things could very well help inspire him.

I also wanted to say that in no way did I want to come off as saying that it's wrong to want your brother to live a long and healthy life. It's just important to remember that there are a lot of misconceptions about weight in relation to health, and that in the end health is a personal decision and not something you can really force on anyone else.

krist3ng

Well!

Having been there before (well, not obese, but having been overweight all my life) I totally understand the 'not caring enough' thing. But it isn't really that. It's more like not believing that weight loss is possible.
Some people get inspired by looking at pics of skinny or in-shape people, but for me that's like looking at pictures of dogs or martians; just something I am not quite sure I can ever be. (Maybe I can, I just can't actually imagine it.) People like me, who can't imagine what it's like to be thin, have trouble getting started because we have a fatalistic "failure imminent" mindset. The only way I get motivated is by being confronted by how overweight I am, and a sincere desire to look better and feel better. But when I'm off the wagon, it's just fun and comforting to lay around eating cheetos (or in my case, all the lucky charms marshmallows). And it's also habit.

He needs something to jolt him out of his apathy. Realizing how much he's gained, or how painful it is to perform normal daily functions. But that comes from within.

No one's ever tried to kindly suggest I diet (thankfully) but I imagine it'd be quite humiliating, and probably wouldn't work: I need some specific, me-related motivation.

Edit: I necro-posted, sorry. LATE TO THE PARTY AS USUAL

Hikaru37

There's nothing wrong with loving yourself the way you are. And seriously, 5'10 and 250? I'm 5'2" and 260 and there would be absolutely nothing wrong with it if I chose to stay at this weight. Health isn't a moral obligation, and so if he doesn't care about his weight.. good for him. People don't need to spend their lives obsessing over their weight and dieting.
I'm sorry that you think that you have the right to judge people based on their weight and perceived health. God forbid someone enjoy their snack and/or video game.

Oi snarky, she's just worried about her brother, if you aren't going to be supportive then take yo' negativity elsewhere -.-
It's hardly going to be 'good for him' when he gets heart disease, high cholesteral, diabetes etc
She's not having a go at him for having snacks and playing a game because everything's fine in moderation, but excessively it's dangerous

So go away you fool

whitehandlady

Well!

Having been there before (well, not obese, but having been overweight all my life) I totally understand the 'not caring enough' thing. But it isn't really that. It's more like not believing that weight loss is possible.
Some people get inspired by looking at pics of skinny or in-shape people, but for me that's like looking at pictures of dogs or martians; just something I am not quite sure I can ever be. (Maybe I can, I just can't actually imagine it.) People like me, who can't imagine what it's like to be thin, have trouble getting started because we have a fatalistic "failure imminent" mindset. The only way I get motivated is by being confronted by how overweight I am, and a sincere desire to look better and feel better. But when I'm off the wagon, it's just fun and comforting to lay around eating cheetos (or in my case, all the lucky charms marshmallows). And it's also habit.

He needs something to jolt him out of his apathy. Realizing how much he's gained, or how painful it is to perform normal daily functions. But that comes from within.

No one's ever tried to kindly suggest I diet (thankfully) but I imagine it'd be quite humiliating, and probably wouldn't work: I need some specific, me-related motivation.

Edit: I necro-posted, sorry. LATE TO THE PARTY AS USUAL

THIS....THIS ....OMG THIS

krist3ng

aww, thanks. Glad to know there are others like me...

modernfemme

People I love expressed concern over my weight at my heaviest, and I shrugged it off. I didn't care - and I didn't want to hear it. I wasn't ready to change. My dad was all into the "healthy" thing and his constant talking about it was annoying to me.

I WISH I listened then - 30 pounds would have been so much easier to loose than 50. But alas, we must change when we're ready and not a moment sooner.

This isn't a topic about looks and vanity. This is a topic about, "wow, if my brother doesn't change, he's going to die. How do I make him care?"

And if that's the way he wants it to be, then I guess that's how it's going to be, but don't troll the OP for caring. She -doesn't- have to be fine with it just because he is.