Quit telling people to "suck it up"

Articeluvsmemphis

You know, I love MFP because I see so much support, and then every now and then you get a hard *kitten* telling people to get over their problems, suck it up, and lose weight. While they're probably telling the bitter truth, they should know it's not that simple, and it's not that nice.

People have baggage, and the ones who carry it on their tummies or hips are here to try and get better: mentally, physically, and maybe spiritually. No one is perfect, and they are coming to MFP to try and garner support that they may or may not be getting in their home life. Managing weight is not easy for everyone, and if it was, there would be no MFP to begin with!

So when you say things to these people like: buck up, suck it up, get over yourself and just do it..... it doesn't help.

But if you say: you can do it, yes you can, hang in there.... it helps.

I'm sure this has been said before, sorry if it's repetitive, but I've seen it too much in the forums and it's been bothering me a lot.

I'm with you, I understand where you're coming from. I wouldn't tell anyone that, but I'm not necessarily opposed to someone being told that just depends on the individual's post. I lean more to being nice though.

CaptainGordo

Thank heaven my forebears "sucked it up" and crossed oceans to find freedom, won wars of independence, crossed plains on foot to build new lives in foreign wilderness -- so that I could enjoy what I have today.

"Sucking it up" and not looking for excuses or coddling works.

ninerbuff

As a trainer, I usually have to tell them to "buck up" and "suck it up". Let's face it, if you really can't do it, you won't. If you don't think you can and someone shows you that you really can, it's much easier to believe rather than hearing "yes you can". When I've heard people say "I can't" and the reply is "yes you can", the next usual words following are an excuse as to why they can't.

In the words of Yoda "Do or do not. There is no TRY".

A.C.E. Certified Personal Trainer
IDEA Fitness member
Kickboxing Certified Instructor
Been in fitness for 28+ years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition

Tropical_Turtle

I so agree that "suck it up" is needed sometimes. How many times can you hear someone whine and complain they "fell off the wagon". They know what they are doing and need to hold themselves accountable. Being very close with some military friends, I to be honest can not tolerate whiners (especially when they do it to themselves!!) I usually either tell them suck it up or pull up your big girl/boy britches and get over it. One can make excuses until the cows come home, but when will one hold themselves to a higher standard??

tuffytuffy1

Immature bullsh|t.

Reported for name calling!

HerpDerp, how about your own name calling -- calling the OP a "soft *kitten*." I'm not that familiar with the rules. Should I report that? And that was not name calling; that was characterizing the mocker's behavior.

sassylilmama

As a trainer, I usually have to tell them to "buck up" and "suck it up". Let's face it, if you really can't do it, you won't. If you don't think you can and someone shows you that you really can, it's much easier to believe rather than hearing "yes you can". When I've heard people say "I can't" and the reply is "yes you can", the next usual words following are an excuse as to why they can't.

In the words of Yoda "Do or do not. There is no TRY".

A.C.E. Certified Personal Trainer
IDEA Fitness member
Kickboxing Certified Instructor
Been in fitness for 28+ years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition

Yoda is one smart MoFo!

CarrieQuiteContrary

I agree, partially. Sometimes being a little more sensitive is appropriate. Sometimes, the person needs a kick in the *kitten* and told to just suck it up. For instance, yesterday I got up at 4AM to work out working with less than 4 hours of sleep. I told myself to suck it up. Sometimes, it's just the answer.

I love your response. And I quite agree.

Kdingo

I agree with you. There are a lot of really rude posters on here.

There are a lot of really thin-skinned posters on here. They should suck it up.

I just feel that the message boards aren't the place for being that blunt with people. I think it will deter some people who really need the support and encouragement from posting. Not only that...a lot of times it's not what you say, but how you say it. We can tell people what they need to hear (as opposed to what they want to hear) without being disrespectful and rude.

It's one thing if we "speak" in that way with our "friends" on here...but not people we don't know. Just my opinion.

:bigsmile: This!!!!:bigsmile:

_SusieQ_

I will cut someone for being soft with me. I don't want anything sugar coated. I would rather someone tell me to stop being a whiny baby about things and get off my @ss. Everyone is motivated in different ways.

HerpDerp745

Immature bullsh|t.

Reported for name calling!

HerpDerp, how about your own name calling -- calling the OP a "soft *kitten*." I'm not that familiar with the rules. Should I report that? And that was not name calling; that was characterizing the mocker's behavior.

Reported for being mad.

CaptainGordo

Immature bullsh|t.

Reported for name calling!

HerpDerp, how about your own name calling -- calling the OP a "soft *kitten*." I'm not that familiar with the rules. Should I report that? And that was not name calling; that was characterizing the mocker's behavior.

Perhaps we need to report some folks for not recognizing sarcasm.

deeharley

Agreed. People instantly just tell people to suck it up when they have no idea about their history or their story. Judging others when you know nothing about them is immature.

While this is true, it's also true that people tell others "It's okay," and "Tomorrow will be better," with no idea about their history or story. Technically, either way is judgmental - they're responding based on their own experiences, not on what they truly know about the other person.

sassylilmama

Immature bullsh|t.

Reported for name calling!

HerpDerp, how about your own name calling -- calling the OP a "soft *kitten*." I'm not that familiar with the rules. Should I report that? And that was not name calling; that was characterizing the mocker's behavior.

I would like to direct you to this wonderful Facebook page https://www.facebook.com/pages/Its-called-SARCASM-Look-it-up/112490988764902

Scott613

Honestly, for me, the "Awesome for trying! WTG!" gets irritating. It's like....i did A SINGLE CURL and i get a gold star? No. I have a really hard time feeling sorry for people who whine. Not losing weight? Maybe get off the computer and DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT instead of asking for pity. Durh.

I argree. I logged and 10 min walk n someone said good job every bit counts lol

You're doing great, keep it up.

surromom2010

Agreed, telling me "these things take time" makes me feel like I have an excuse to have that candy bar in the first week of my diet, since I'm still transitioning. I'd totally respond to someone saying stop crying and keep jogging. That's how I got through boot camp and it totally changed my mind about the phrase "mind over matter".

HerpDerp745

Immature bullsh|t.

Reported for name calling!

I'm not that familiar with the rules. Should I report that?

Please see the post: NEW FORUM GUIDELINES - PLEASE READ BEFORE POSTING before posting.

Thanks

killagb

Immature bullsh|t.

Reported for name calling!

HerpDerp, how about your own name calling -- calling the OP a "soft *kitten*." I'm not that familiar with the rules. Should I report that? And that was not name calling; that was characterizing the mocker's behavior.

You are free to report anything you like. The OP called 'suck it up' people a 'hard *kitten*', I guess I should report that too. I did report the 'eat it' comment from the person complaining about immature BS....irony, I love it.

Tropical_Turtle

Ermey - My HERO!!! I might have to post this pic in my office lol

nazey25

Wow, the immaturity of some people is astounding. Why do some of you feel the need to attack someone for sharing their feelings? Are you so insecure that you can't extend the kindness to be supportive of someone...in whatever way they need. Sure some people might need the suck it up kick in the butt, but not everyone is the same way. Comments like that might send others, right back to bad habits of eating junk & not exercising (something many ppl do when they feel beaten down), which would take away all of the hard work they've done and ruin this site for them. Some people just need a bit more kindness in the support you offer. Why bother posting if you are just here to be rude & mock people? That's not what this site is about. And for those of you that do this, I pity you...your life must be such crap that you get joy out of belittling others...so sad & pathetic!

meerkat70

So when you say things to these people like: buck up, suck it up, get over yourself and just do it..... it doesn't help.

But if you say: you can do it, yes you can, hang in there.... it helps.

Well, firstly, I don't think these two positions are, in fact, mutually exclusive.

And secondly, I'd say that you do in fact need to 'just do it'. No, it's not simple in one sense, since it requires a massive change of mind, especially for those of us with a lot to lose. But it is the truth of what you have to do, nonetheless. You have to stop whining, stop making excuses, stop imagining that there's something terribly special about you that makes you uniquely unable to lose the weight... and get on with it.